26. Maddy
Chapter 26
Maddy
I sleep badly, the frustration of my interaction with Kain and my concern for Sarra impossible to distract myself from. With Inga somewhere in the Bear Wing now, I've taken to sleeping with Thyrvi every night, carrying furs down with me from the third floor and making my own little nest. My sleeping chamber locks, so I leave my valuables and clothes there, checking corridors before going up to wash and dress each morning.
Thyrvi and I did some investigating, and we think her bear has taken a stall at the other end of the massive barn, though I've never heard her. The only place I've actually seen them is in the training room, and it resulted in a tense but brief conversation where we agreed I'd use it in the mornings and she would use it in the evening. The gods only know if the two bears will ever actually train together in the huge space, as it was designed for. I highly doubt it.
As soon as I'm washed and dressed in the morning, I hurry over to the healing chambers to get Sarra.
My stomach plummets as I push my way into the room I left her in and see her still asleep on one of the pallets I've occupied numerous times before, her skin a sallow gray color.
There's nobody around, so I sit by her bed and open one of the books from my big book bag. Nothing is particularly holding my interest until I come across a passage about lesser gods channeling their magic into artifacts.
Of the more than fifty lesser gods, many were inclined to store parts of their magic in items like jewelry and weapons that fae may come across. It is believed that some gods did this because they favored the fae and wished them to wield more power, whilst others had more malicious intentions and wished to hurt the unsuspecting finder of the artifact.
Lesser gods, whilst more powerful than the Vanir, or High Fae, were not able to preserve themselves as the higher gods were, so they also stored parts of themselves in mundane items in order to keep their legacy intact. Some gods even added their magic to items to evade banishment or punishment by the higher gods.
I lean back in my chair, thinking. My sister has been convinced for as long as I can remember that the tiara of Skadi has magical powers. Skadi could do many things, but healing wasn't one of them, so I never understood why she was so convinced it could heal me. But if what I'm reading is true, then she may well be right about it having power of some sort. Over ice, maybe? Snow?
I'm about to go to the gallery and look up what all of the goddess Skadi's powers were when a new thought strikes me.
What if the Helm of Embers contains a god's power?
Kain said the helm can't undo any of his punishment, but if it holds any godly power then it must be able to do something pretty spectacular.
Before I can stop myself, I'm in the gallery, looking for any lesser gods connected with fire, embers, or the fire-fae.
By the time I've checked three statues, I have a small list of possibilities. Logi, a god of heat who is revered for the warmth and light that fire gives, but also feared in his truest untamed form. Logi's wife, the goddess Glod, who was fiercely protective of her two daughters. And the lava god Stutr, who was banished from Yggdrasil after his plan to overthrow Odin with liquid fire was exposed.
I chew my lip as I consider what I've learned. If the power of any fire god is contained in that helm, we will all be in danger if Kain gets both pieces. Does it really matter which god?
"Good morning," says Erik, striding in and startling me from my thoughts. His face tightens when he sees Sarra. "No improvement, then," he mutters.
"What's wrong with her?"
He moves to a low table and starts grinding something brown in a stone bowl. "I've never seen the likes of it before. It's magic, though, for sure."
I swallow. "What kind of magic?"
"Earth-fae magic."
I'm alarmed by his words for two reasons. The Earth Court is being assailed by some sort of sickness. And that staff I gave her had strange earth-fae magic in it.
I decide to start with the sickness. "She told me humans in her court were getting sick," I say.
He glances at me. "Yes. I had heard that too. A strange illness nobody has been able to cure yet."
"Including you?"
"Including me." He nods. "But that is not what this is. None of the symptoms are the same." He turns toward her with the poultice he's made. I hurriedly stand, getting out of his way. "She has hallucinations, gray skin, blackened fingertips, and a frequent green hue to her eyes. She is confused, and weak, and has no appetite, which is currently the most dangerous thing to her."
"She won't eat?"
"Everything I have given her has made her retch."
I bite my lip, my stomach twisting with worry and guilt. "I… I gave her a staff belonging to the earth-fae who died on the way to Featherblade."
Erik doesn't turn, just keeps rubbing the brown mix across her forehead. "Okay," he says.
"She said it had strange earth-fae magic in it. And this isn't the first time she's acted strange."
Now he turns to me. "Where is this staff? Tell me exactly what she said and did."
I turn Sarra's workshop upside down looking for the staff. I search her dormitory room, I search the thrall common areas, and I even search the hallways and tunnels the thralls use, but I can't find Aldrich's staff anywhere.
I gave Erik all the information I could think of, recalling every single thing she said and did, but he told me that without the staff he can't identify the magic that is making her sick.
"There must be something you can do for her?" I am standing over her bed trying to control my emotions.
I gave her that staff. This is my fault.
"I have an idea. But I need more to act on it. I need confirmation."
"Of what?"
He tilts his head. "I'm reluctant to say, as it is highly unlikely. But without the staff, I don't think your friend has very long left."
Tears fill my eyes and I grip her hand. Something stabs my palm, and I yank my hand back.
Erik leans forward. "What is she holding?"
I gently open her fingers. It's the feather she was clutching when I found her, the delicate strands now crushed. I show the Valkyrie, and his eyes widen.
"She went searching for a feather?"
Did I not tell him that? "Yes. She said all she remembered was that she really wanted this feather, but she didn't know why."
Erik shakes his head thoughtfully. "This may be confirmation enough. It was not that feather she wanted." He holds up a hand, and his snake shimmers to life around his arm. "Yes, this explains why she went outside," he mutters. His eyes focus on me. "The previous owner of the staff was killed by shrieks?"
"Yes."
"Describe them." His snake winds down his arm onto Sarra's shoulder.
I try to recall the shrieks without using my memory magic and describe them to him.
"Tell me, Madivia, did any of the birds look different from the others?"
I can't remember, but I know the answer will be in the gallery. I don't think I can access a memory as intense as that one and have Erik not notice, though. I need to be alone to check. "I'm not sure," I say. "Possibly?"
"I believe your friend is infected with shriek magic."
"Shrieks have magic?"
"Only a few. And if any transferred to that staff… A rune-marked human will never have come into contact with a shriek before now. Fae, yes, but not a human able to channel magic. This is most, most interesting."
"Can you help her?"
He looks at me. "She knew what she needed to survive. That's why she risked leaving the safety of Featherblade."
I stare at him. "The feather?"
"A shriek feather." He lifts the broken black feather from my hand and lays it on the mattress. "This is all she found before hallucinations and fear drove her back to safety, but what she wanted, what she needed , is a shriek feather."
"Do you have one?"
He shakes his head quickly. "No."
"Then how do we get one?"
He raises a brow. "You go out there and you find a shriek nest. My recommendation is to get one that has already fallen, rather than facing the beasts."
"Will you go and get one?" I ask quietly.
"Whilst in a teaching capacity, none of the Valkyrie are permitted to leave Featherblade."
That seems highly unlikely.
I blink at him, Kain's words in my mind. None of the Valkyrie will help a human thrall.
He tilts his head. "Sigrun may come and go as she pleases, but there have been instances in the past where the Valkyrie have had favorites and snuck out to help them during the Oskorela , or gone to their homes to gather better weapons, armor, and comforts. To ensure the Wild Hunt is fair, she banned Valkyrie leaving Featherblade."
"Right," I say quietly. I'm not sure I believe him.
"Of course, we may break the boundary in an emergency situation. Like Frost Giants attacking." He scowls.
I look back at Sarra. "And there's no other way to save her?"
His snake shimmers, then flows back up his arm. "She needs shriek magic to survive."
"What if I find the staff?"
"Then perhaps I could use it to do something to help."
I clench my jaw. I'll find the infernal thing if it kills me.
The next twenty-four hours are a blur. All I do is search. Thyrvi helps me trace Sarra's route from her workshop to where she crossed the boundary at the springs. I skip sailing on Thursday and instead search places I'm sure Sarra has never been, in lieu of any other option.
I don't find the staff.
I'm standing by the bush I found her under, guilt consuming me, when Kain strides into view. He's been a few steps behind me all day, and I'm pretty sure he's scanning the ground as keenly as I am.
"She might have destroyed it," he says quietly. "She's been hallucinating and she's unstable."
I stare at him, and a thought occurs to me. "A while ago her workshop got trashed. At the time, I thought it was somebody trying to get at me, but I didn't think anyone knew I spent time there."
He shakes his head. "Trust me. Nobody else knew you slept there."
"Do you think she did it?" I whisper.
He shrugs. "Perhaps."
"Fuck!" I shout, and Thyrvi snaps her head to me in surprise at the outburst. Kain doesn't flinch. "If she's destroyed it…" I trail off, trying not to let the burning tears escape my eyes. "It's my fault! I gave her that stupid infected fucking staff!"
I look out toward the dense forest beyond Featherblade.
"Princess, you can't go back out there to look for it."
"Odin's arse I can't," I tell Kain, and once more step over the shrub. Thyrvi lumbers after me and Kain spits a stream of swear words as quietly as he can behind me.
We search everywhere Thyrvi can smell Sarra's trail around the small pool, but there's nothing.
Kain is glaring at me once more when I cross back.
"I can't protect you there," he growls.
"I don't need your protection. I have Thyrvi, and I can do this." I lift my hand and shoot razor-sharp icicles at the ground a few feet from him. It feels good to let the rage out a bit, but I know it's immature.
Again, he doesn't flinch. "I don't care. Stop. Going. Out. There," he grits out. "I have a vested interest in you, and I don't want you where I can't reach you."
Reach me. The fucking irony, when he won't let me touch him.
He's helping you, Maddy, and nobody else is. Do not take this out on him.
"I don't know what to do," I say instead. I keep the wobble out of my voice, barely. "I won't let her die."
Kain's eyes soften. A rare sight, and a welcome one. "Did Erik say anything else would help?"
I shake my head. "No. Only a shriek feather."
Kain almost flinches at that. "Awful fucking creatures," he says.
But I don't really hear him.
Do what you can, ignore what you can't.
I can't find the staff.
But I do know where to find a shriek feather.
Slowly, I look back out at the forest. "Princess," Kain says warningly, "I don't like the look on your face."
"The Oskorela ," I breathe.
"What?"
"I'm going to have go at some point. But if I go tomorrow, I can try to find a feather." Hope pours through my veins like icy energy, and I spin back to him. "There must be plenty lying around out there!"
"Princess, don't be so fucking stupid."
Hope is replaced instantly by anger.
"Stupid? You dare call me stupid for trying to prevent a death I caused?" I shouts, and his lips press into a hard line as he sucks in air through his nose.
After a silence only broken by the icy solidifying of my hands, he throws his own in the air.
"Fine! Like I've got a hope in hel of stopping you."
"Why would you want to stop me? I will have to go out there anyway, and I couldn't be more prepared. I have magic and her ." I throw my arm out at Thyrvi, who is actually rocking from paw to paw.
"We are going on the Wild Hunt?" she says in my mind. Her voice is filled with barely contained excitement.
"We are going to find a shriek feather to save my best friend's life." I stare at Kain. "Didn't you just tell me how important motivation is? What better motivation can I have for surviving the Oskorela ? I'm coming back with that feather, and I defy anybody, or anything, to stop me."