38. Avery
THIRTY-EIGHT
AVERY
“I’m blaming you for our tardiness,” I say to Reid as we walk down the hall to Dallas and Maven’s apartment. “This is your fault.”
“Yeah, because you really hated the second orgasm I gave you,” he draws out, and I blush. “I’ll never do that again.”
I elbow his ribs. “Don’t withhold sex from me, Duncan. I like your dick too much.”
He tips his head back and laughs. The sound echoes down the hall, and I laugh too. “We’ll both claim responsibility. You, for your perfect pussy. Me, for being easily distracted.”
“There’s the holiday spirit.” I smile. “Nothing says Christmas like a perfect pussy.”
“Falalala, I want to eat you out later.”
“There’s the holiday spirit. Hey, speaking of holiday spirit. How are we going to act around our friends?”
“What do you mean?” he asks. “Are they aliens or something?”
“Are we going to be affectionate? Ignore each other? Send messages back and forth on our phones?”
“I can smell you on my hand, Avery. It’s going to be impossible to ignore you.”
“Okay, well.” I blush and fix my skirt. “I haven’t told Maven and Emmy we’re sleeping together. Okay, that’s not true. I haven’t told them we’re sleeping together again. Maven knows about the first two times before Vegas.”
“Really?” Reid frowns and stops outside their door. “I told Maverick and Dallas.”
“ What ? You did? When?”
“Months ago. The night you came over after book club, actually. Maverick could tell I was hiding something, and being honest about what was going on in my life was easier than trying to lie. I’m a shit liar. Is it okay that they know?”
“Of course it’s okay. They’re your best friends.”
“Maven is your best friend, and you’ve spent time with Emmy. Why haven’t you told them? I don’t care that you haven’t. I’m just curious.”
“I don’t know,” I say, and it’s the truth. “I’m not embarrassed of you or anything like that.”
“You think I’m a nerd, don’t you?”
“I’ll tell you you’re a nerd to your face,” I say. “I guess I didn’t want it to be this big thing. I wanted to have a sexual relationship with someone without all the meddling. Without people asking when it’s going to turn into a relationship. I want to tell them now, though. I don’t want to keep it a secret anymore.”
“Yeah?” He grins and bands an arm around my waist. “I’d be shocked if Maven didn’t already know. She and Dallas tell each other everything.”
“I guess we’ll find out soon.” I nod to the bag of gifts he’s holding. They’re all for June, and there has to be close to a dozen in there. “Want me to take that?”
“So you get all the credit? Fuck, no.”
Reid walks into the apartment and I follow behind him. We take off our coats and shoes and head toward the laughter and loud voices coming from the living room. Our friends are gathered around a tray of nachos and pizza, and they all cheer when they see us.
“There you are!” Maven jumps up and hugs me. “I was starting to think something happened to you.”
“Sorry,” I say.
“We got caught up with work,” Reid explains. He takes a seat on the couch next to June and hands over her presents. “It’s Avery’s fault. She lost track of time. Told me to keep going and she didn’t want to stop.”
I glare at him. His grin is beautiful, a wicked display of happiness that pangs in my chest, and I know I could never be mad at him. Not really.
“It’s exhausting having to tell someone multiple times how to figure something out.” I sigh and put my hands on my hips, smirking when Reid narrows his eyes. “They just don’t get the hint.”
“Let’s get you a drink,” Maven says, and she drags me from the living room. I flip Reid off before I round the corner to the kitchen. He pretends to catch it and tucks it away in his pocket. “What sounds good?”
“Anything,” I say. I’m still on edge and turned on after he felt me up in the parking garage. He slid my underwear down my legs and tucked them in his pocket. He didn’t give me a third orgasm, not yet, and I’m buzzing with anticipation and need after his teasing. “Alcohol. Lots of it.”
“I’ll make you a martini,” Emmy says, joining us at the island in the center of the room. “Gin or vodka?”
“Vodka, please,” I say, leaning against the counter. “A double, if you can.”
She gives me a sly look and hums. “Any particular reason we’re indulging so heavily in alcohol? Does it have anything to do with the mark on your neck and why your lipstick is smeared?”
Maven gasps and touches my cheek. “Holy shit. It is smeared.”
I fumble with my purse and pull out a compact, groaning when I see the bright red streak across my jaw. “Goddamn him.”
“Who is him? Are you seeing someone?” Maven asks, and I sit on a barstool.
“I’ll tell you, but you cannot make this a big deal, okay?” I say. “Really. You’re going to want to freak out, and there’s nothing to freak out about.”
“I promise,” she says.
“Reid and I have been… we’re…” I trail off, struggling to find the right words. “Sleeping together. We’ve been sleeping together. But we also spending time together outside the bedroom. And he bought me a special edition of my favorite romance novel for Christmas. We text a lot, and, well, I don’t know.” I shrug and brush a pile of crumbs into a hand. “Sex. We’re having sex.”
Maven looks at Emmy. “This sounds familiar,” she says.
“Is it? Reid is a lot less obnoxious than Miller,” Emmy says as she pours a generous serving of vodka into the shaker. “He also has the glasses thing going for him and he’s not a total playboy with an ego the size of the state of Maryland. I don’t see how they’re related at all, actually.”
“I’m confused.” I drop my elbows to the counter and rest my chin in my hands. “Can someone fill me in?”
“This is exactly how Maverick and Emmy got together. They were at each other’s throats, until one day, they kissed. Fast forward a few years later, and she’s wearing his ring on her finger,” Maven explains.
“Reid and I aren’t… it’s not dating,” I explain as Emmy hands me my drink. “It’s sex and then some. A friends with benefits arrangement with extras on the side. Like today. I get to come here and spend the evening with you all.”
“Do you like spending time with him?” Maven asks, and I sip on my martini.
There’s a moment of hesitation where I think about keeping these thoughts and feelings I’ve been having to myself, but I see them watching me, and I’m struck with how badly I want to spill my secrets.
Making friends as an adult woman is so fucking hard. It’s nearly impossible when you add in a job with a heavy workload that requires frequent traveling. I’m constantly surrounded by men, looked at as one of the boys just because of my job, and I find myself craving the femininity that comes with talking with close female confidants.
“Yeah,” I say. “Lately, it seems like all my free time is spent with him.”
“What happened to never sleeping with him again?” Maven teases, and I groan. “I distinctly remember sitting in a booth with you when you said those very words.”
“I thought that too. That was the plan. Then he kissed me, and, well, here we are. Having sex on a near daily basis.”
“ Daily ?” Maven repeats, incredulous. “I didn’t realize it was so serious.”
“It’s not serious.”
“Spending almost every day with someone is teetering closer to serious than it is casual.” She glances at Emmy and tilts her head to the side. “A little help, Hartwell?”
“I’m not sure I have anything to add. As long as everyone understands the rules of the relationship—and I use that term loosely—what’s the harm?” Emmy asks.
“We’re both well aware of what it is and what it isn’t.” I pause and trace the rim of my glass with my finger. “I might have a teeny, tiny crush on him, though, and that goes outside of what’s allowed. It’s not what we agreed on.”
“Sex can go from detached to intimate real quick. It’s nearly impossible to separate yourself from the person if you’re consistently with them. A one-night stand is easy. You get what you want out of it then go on your way. Repeatedly seeing the same person allows time for those what-ifs to pop up. It’s what happened with me and pretty boy,” Emmy says, sounding matter-of-fact. Like she’s talked about this a hundred times. “Take me and pretty boy, for example. One minute, it’s all about each other’s pleasure. The next, he’s taking care of me when I’m sick and washing my hair. I’m not immune to romantic gestures; that’s enough to sweep anyone off their feet. I think it’s normal to develop some sort of emotional connection with someone who’s seeing the most vulnerable parts of you.”
“That’s the thing,” I say. “He is seeing the most vulnerable parts of me. It’s not intentional, but he’s putting together the puzzle of my life, and I’m afraid of what happens when he finds the final piece. What then?”
“Well.” Maven takes my hand and smiles. “That’s generally when people fall in love. It’s not something you plan. It’s something that happens along the way.”
That word again.
The same one I tossed around earlier.
Love .
A hesitant and terrifying consideration.
Reid is the embodiment of the perfect man. Calm and patient and good to his very core. He’s smart and funny and everything I’d look for in a partner if I were looking for one. Kind and full of hope.
It would be silly not to love him.
“We’ll see,” I say. “For now, we’re going to keep doing what we’re doing. Seeing where it goes and having fun.”
“I’ll drink to that,” Emmy says, lifting her drink. “To good dick and men who treat us right.”
I laugh, and we knock our glasses together. “Thank you so much for letting me join the festivities.”
“We’re happy you’re here.” Maven rests her cheek on my shoulder. “It’s nothing special, but it’s nice not to be alone this time of year.”
“Don’t sell it short, Mae,” Reid says from behind us. I turn around and see him leaning in the entryway of the kitchen, his arms folded across his chest. “This is my favorite holiday because I get to spend it with you all.”
“My expectations are low after Thanksgiving,” Maven says. “The burnt turkey really brought the mood down.”
“And Dallas and I were stuck out in Phoenix so we couldn’t even enjoy it.” Reid walks to the fridge and pulls out a water bottle, his gaze moving to me. “How are you doing, Sinclair?”
“I’m good.” I smile and hold up my martini. “I have alcohol and friends. What more do I need?”
“Sounds perfect if you ask me. Did you tell them about the concert?”
“Oh.” I brighten, looking at the women and beaming. “The Ella Wright concert? I’m so excited.”
“I told Dallas our relationship hinged on him getting us seats,” Maven says, popping a cherry from a bowl on the island in her mouth. “He made quick work of that.”
“Maverick walks around our apartment singing her songs.” Emmy smirks. “I think he likes her more than I do.”
“I like her too,” Reid says. “I put June’s presents under the tree, Mae. Hope that’s okay.”
“That’s perfect. She always loves what you get her.” Maven stands and kisses his cheek, sneaking me a sly glance. “Will you help me clear the appetizer plates, Em? The ham will be ready soon and we need some space.”
“Sure.” Emmy finishes off her drink and sets it in the sink. “If you want a second, Avery, let me know. I’m happy to make you another round.”
“I think I’m good right now,” I say, crossing my legs and sighing. I feel warm. Content and surrounded by excellent company. “Thanks, though.”
The girls disappear, leaving Reid and me alone. He brushes the hair away from my neck and kisses my throat.
“Did you tell them?” he asks.
“Yeah.” I close my eyes and hum when he moves his mouth down my neck. “My smeared lipstick kind of gave it away.”
“Whoops.” He drops a kiss to my cheek. “Guess that’s my fault. You’re irresistible, Ave. I can’t help it.”
“A few months ago, you wanted nothing to do with me,” I say.
“And look at me now. I’m bringing you to Christmas Eve dinner.”
I spin on the stool so he’s standing between my legs. I hook my fingers in the belt loops of his jeans and tug him closer to me. “I’m so glad I get to be here with you.”
“Me too,” Reid says. “I’m glad you get to celebrate with our friends.”
It’s funny to think we’ve cultivated a life that blends together so easily.
I felt like I’ve been muddling through the last couple of years. Grieving my dad. Adjusting to a new role away from home. Getting over a breakup and learning to love myself again. Branching out and trying new things.
These past few months, though, I’ve started to think I’ve found my place. The spot where I belong and where I’m most happy.
In all those shining moments, Reid is there. A constant pillar and the brightest star in the sky. It’s almost like I was waiting for him to show up, and my life is better because of it.
“Should we help them set the table?” I ask. “If we stay in here any longer, they’re going to start making sex jokes.”
“Trust me. The jokes have already started. After we eat, I have one more surprise for you,” he says.
“You’ve already done more than enough for me.”
“This is different. I know how important your dad was to you. I also know it’s not Christmas Day, and I know you’re not there in person to watch like you normally would, but I wanted to include a part of him today. I, uh, might have downloaded last year’s Orlando Blazers game so we can stream it later. It might be in a different language and it might ruin Dallas’s television, but I thought we could give it a try.”
“Y—you did that? For me?” I whisper.
“Yeah.” Reid smiles. “There’s no rule saying we can’t do both old and new traditions.”
A sob racks my shoulders. I throw my arms around him and hug him as tight as I can, afraid that if I ease up for even a second, he’ll disappear.
I’ve been scared to admit it, but now I know with absolute certainty. If I let myself fall, Reid is the one I’m going to fall for.
I think I’m already halfway there.