Chapter 25
Adriana
I found it impossible to sleep that night. By morning, I was still a complete mess. It was hard to believe that Bryant really did own the Pacific, that I’d slept with both Landon and Nolan at the same time, and that I’d broken up with all of them at the same time.
She was probably going to say that she told me so, but I texted Sierra about what happened anyway. I needed someone to talk to, someone who could keep me from losing my mind.
I checked my watch. I was going to be late if I didn’t leave immediately. In a rush, I left the staff quarters and stormed up to reception.
“The Whitfields have left for their breakfast,” Louisa announced as I walked up to her table. “You okay?”
I’d forgotten about that. I was supposed to get up earlier to get them to the car. It wasn’t a huge mistake. It was still fine. All I had to do was focus on my job and let it distract me from the drama.
“Fine,” I answered Louisa, even though I was aware that it didn’t sound very convincing. “Is the dining room ready for the group that booked it?”
“Isn’t that tomorrow?”
“I’ll check.” I reached into my jacket for my tablet, which wasn’t there. “Damnit. This isn’t my morning.”
“I’ll uh, keep an eye on things while you go get it,” Louisa suggested, her face full of concern. “If you’re not feeling well, maybe you should take the day off? I don’t think anyone would blame you. You’ve been working your fingers to the bone.”
“No, I’m okay, I promise,” I insisted. Taking time off would only make it all worse. I’d spend all day in my room thinking about Bryant, Landon, and Nolan, and nothing else. That would easily lead to a spiral of overthinking, and I’d end up running away in the middle of the night.
It was better to stay busy.
The little issue with forgetting my tablet wasn’t the only mistake I’d made that day.
All through the morning and afternoon, I found myself forgetting things, misinterpreting schedules, and mistiming where I had to be.
It was as if I had completely lost the ability overnight to do my job well.
Some people noticed, but no one said anything.
They simply adjusted to make up for my incompetence in most cases.
I avoided the men as much as I could, sending someone in my stead whenever anything came up that called for their involvement.
For now, I couldn’t handle facing them. I didn’t know how Landon and Nolan felt about everything that happened, but I hoped that eventually, things would die down, and we could work together. Nothing more than that.
I was standing by the concierge desk waiting for the next set of guests to return from a trip to Big Sur, when I noticed the notifications on my personal phone. Two missed calls from Sierra, and several messages.
She wanted to know if I was okay, if I was coping. There was no judgment in any of it, just concern.
But even though I’d wanted nothing more than to talk to her about it just a few hours ago, I couldn’t stomach going over everything again now. It felt like the only way to get through this was to pretend that nothing was going on at all.
Everything’s good now, I texted her back. She wasn’t going to believe me, but I’d simply have to double down until she eventually gave up.
“The florist is looking for you.” A porter appeared in front of me out of nowhere, and I frowned for a second, having completely forgotten what we needed a florist for.
Dahlia’s wedding. My jaw tightened. On top of everything else, I had to make sure the hotel was prepared for that.
It was only two months away, and it felt as if nothing was going to be ready in time.
It had been incredibly difficult to keep up with it between the rest of my work and the shambles of my personal life.
“Tell him to meet me in the conference room,” I answered, feeling like my head was going to explode.
Great. Now I had a stress migraine, too. Though I kept a professional smile on my face. No matter what was going on behind the scenes, I couldn’t let it spill over into my job, even if that seemed like complete irony.
The meeting with the florist was a disaster.
I couldn’t find Dahlia’s preferences in the mess of new files I’d created on the tablet, and figured I’d organize later when I had some time.
Luckily, the florist still had my original list on file to prevent the whole meeting from devolving into absolute chaos.
At the end of the day, it was time for my debrief with Landon. But, as I was on my way to his office, I received a voice message from him on my work phone.
“I noticed you had a difficult day today. Don’t worry about the debrief. Take an early night, and get some sleep. Louisa will update me and tell you anything you need to know in the morning.”
It tugged at my heartstrings to hear his voice. It was kind and warm, like it had been at the very beginning of our affair. He was clearly actually worried about me.
And it tore me up inside to turn around and go back to my room without talking to him. I couldn’t ignore the fact that my heart was still pulling me toward him, and to Nolan, and to Bryant. I wasn’t sure whether I could move past this, but I had to if I wanted to keep my career intact.
In my room, I checked the rest of Sierra’s messages. She hadn’t believed me when I’d said I was okay, and she wanted to know what I actually felt.
I couldn’t tell her. Even the thought of it had me tearing up again.
“Don’t worry, it’s over.” That was all I had the strength to reply.
The next few days were more of the same.
I repeated several mistakes, and no matter how hard I tried to focus on my work, I couldn’t seem to get back into my usual rhythm.
During nightly debriefs, I found myself apologizing for my errors and pretending that everything was fine.
I could see that Landon wasn’t buying it, but he didn’t say anything, either.
All I could do was to hope that things would eventually get better before I did something so bad that neither Landon, nor Bryant could overlook it anymore.
About five days after the breakup, things hadn’t eased up much for me.
I was trying to coordinate the music for Dahlia walking down the aisle, and figure out seating for a dinner party taking place that night.
But that wasn’t all. I also had to deal with a request for a private session in the pool at the same time.
It was in the middle of this chaos that I noticed Reggie from the corner of my eye, walking up to me cautiously. That was the last thing I needed right now, and I was fighting a breakdown already.
“Adriana,” Reggie said as he reached my desk, and I pinched the bridge of my nose to avoid a sarcastic answer.
“Please tell me you’re happy today,” I finally replied. “I don’t think I can deal with anything else.”
“Actually, I’ve gotten a pass from Landon to take you for high tea in the upstairs dining room,” Reggie said with a grin. “As a thank you for the birthday dinner. He said he’d delegate your work to someone else. Unless you’d prefer not to take a sanctioned break.”
I checked my phone and saw a message from Landon confirming what Reggie was saying.
I was to join him for tea so that he wouldn’t have to be alone.
The excuse was that the tea we served was for two people, and making it for only one was a waste.
I had a feeling there were other reasons behind it, but I really didn’t feel like arguing.
“Okay,” I said to Reggie, giving him an honest, tired smile. “Just give me a minute to get everything in order.”
“I’ll meet you there,” he replied, almost dancing when he walked away.
I started sending messages out to get things delegated while I wondered whose idea this high tea actually was. Had Reggie noticed me spiraling, or were Landon and Bryant behind it? Was Nolan going to be the one serving the tea? Were all three of them going to show up there to talk?
I could feel my stress levels skyrocketing with every question that ran through my mind, but I managed to keep moving forward.
When I stepped into the dining room, I was relieved and a little disappointed to see that it was only Reggie and one of the senior waitresses present.
Reggie already had a pot of tea in front of him with two cups.
I took a seat beside him, my head still filled with everything I had to do and everything I had to face.
“Listen,” Reggie said firmly as he started pouring tea for each of us. “I don’t know what’s going on with you, but this tea is about relaxing. I won’t have you sitting there all stressed out. It’s getting on my nerves.”
I tried to change my posture as well as my face. “I’m sorry. I’ve had a long week with the wedding and everything.”
“Yeah, I doubt that’s all of it,” Reggie answered, dropping two sugar cubes into his own cup. I added three to mine. “But it isn’t my business, really. I don’t need to know what’s going on in your personal life.”
I noticed the look on the waitress’s face, but she turned away and left the room quickly. Probably to gossip while she fetched the scones.
“Still, don’t try and pretend that it’s work that’s got you pouting like this,” Reggie continued, looking at me like he could figure out what the problem was if he stared hard enough.
“I would never believe that. You’re the best damn concierge this place has ever had, at least as long as I’ve stayed here. ”
I studied him for a minute, slowly stirring my own tea. “You’re just saying that.”
“Am not,” he insisted like a kid arguing with a sibling. “No matter what’s been thrown at you, you’ve tackled it with calm elegance and a vicious efficiency.”
“Did you get that from a thesaurus?” I laughed, though his words were affecting me.
He wasn’t wrong. I had been good at my job from the beginning. But I didn’t know if that could be true without Nolan, Landon, and Bryant. Each one of them had helped me build my confidence and focus in a different way, and it felt like I’d lost all of that now.
“You might be surprised at how smart I actually am,” Reggie answered with a wiggle of his eyebrows. “You might even say that I’m wise.”
I laughed again, feeling some of the weight washing off of my shoulders. “I’m not going to argue with a guest.”
“That’s good,” Reggie nodded as the waitress came back in with our scones. He waited for her to leave before he continued speaking. “Because you need to be listening to me.”
“Right,” I nodded, working on cutting my scone in two and putting butter and cream on it while Reggie kept going.
“You didn’t get this job because you’re a yes-man, or an idiot.
You got it because you are excellent at it.
You’ve gotten some of the hardest issues out of the way without batting an eye.
Whatever’s got you hung up, it’s not enough to ruin you.
It would take a whole lot more to bring you down. At least, that’s what I believe.”
I paused and watched him fix up his own scone, managing to smear some of the cream on his jacket. Despite his clumsiness, the man had a knack for making salient points.
Only the cream of the crop worked at the Pacific, and I was one of them. I’d always put my personal issues aside to be the best at what I did. I’d never chased after men to get where I was. I’d gotten here all on my own, and I’d faced incredible challenges along the way.
Maybe I could still make it. On my own. Even if the men did make me feel like a stronger person, that didn’t mean that I was weak without them. It was my ruthless ambition that had drawn them to me in the first place.
“This is real good,” Reggie muttered as he took a bite of the scone. “Don’t you think?”
I glanced down at mine and realized how hungry I was. I ate gracefully, aware that I was still accompanying a guest and expected to stay professional. In my mind, I went over what Reggie had said again, finding a deep sense of confidence building in my soul.
“You know what, Reggie?” I said halfway through my scone. “If I make it through this shift, I’ll have you to thank.”
“I’ll remember that,” Reggie answered with a splash of joking malice in his tone.
After the tea, I felt a lot better about myself, ready to take on the world. I knew that I could do this, I knew that I was here for a reason. I just needed to focus and put aside everything that had been dragging me down.
Then, as I walked down the hallways to get back to work, I got a call. I froze when I read Landon’s name on the screen, but reminded myself that I could do this.
“Adriana,” he said when I answered. “Dahlia’s wedding’s been moved up by three weeks.”
“What? I—”
“Just get it done. Or else.”