Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Ethan
“Probably not,” I reply, turning to face him. “But I’ve always wondered why all these sculptures have small cocks.”
“Ethan!” Jacob snorts under his breath, slapping my arm playfully with the back of his hand. “I think I read somewhere that having a small penis was a sign of virtue, and having a big cock was a sign of barbarism, little self-control, and a gluttonous appetite.”
He gives me a knowing look. “Which, we know, isn’t the case now, as you are far from a barbarian.”
I roll my lips, suppressing a smile. “Are you saying that I wouldn’t have a marble statue of me in the nude in the future? Maybe in the Hockey Hall of Fame?”
“No, I’m not saying that, but if they did, I would be the first in line for the unveiling,” he says, winking.
We’ve come to London to do some more exploring, including a visit to the Victoria and Albert Museum, which was on Jacob’s bucket list. I booked us a night at Claridge’s and also booked a table tomorrow for afternoon tea.
Our time here is coming to an end. In a few days, we’ll be heading back to Chicago, and I’m not sure how I feel about it. When I suggested giving into desire while we’re here, I didn’t expect to find myself so…at ease with Jacob.
It feels very natural. Seamless.
It makes me question whether we could continue this when we get back, but then the negative side of my brain questions if it’s this good because there are no expectations. If it’s easy because we’re just giving in to the chemistry, no strings attached.
“Do you think you’ll end up being in the Hockey Hall of Fame?” Jacob asks after a beat, pulling me out of my head.
I shrug. “No idea.”
There are rumors I’ll be nominated once I’m eligible. You have to be fully retired for a minimum of three years before you can be considered, so it’s not something I like to think about.
“I think you will. I can understand your fears, Ethan, of not knowing who you are outside of hockey, but you can have this.” He motions around us.
“In the world of hockey, your name would be here. Your legacy will be so magnificent, so awed by many, for generations to come. You won’t be forgotten the second you hang up your skates.
Like, your name is engraved on the Stanley Cup how many times? ”
My lips twitch. “Five.”
“Five, Ethan, five . I know nothing about hockey, but I know for sure that that is an incredible achievement. Plus, you’ve won Gold for Canada in the Olympics twice, along with a number of other gold medals and awards.”
Unsure how to handle his high praise, I turn and walk to the next statue, gazing up at the magnificent sculpture.
Hockey has been my life for as long as I can remember, and it’s a bittersweet pill to swallow knowing that my time playing professionally is coming to an end.
Jacob steps in front of me, reaching up to cup my face with one hand.
“Don’t run away from me. I don’t think you truly see how special you are—which is amazing.
You’re incredibly humble for someone in your position, with your talent, but I think you underestimate the power your name has.
Just because you hang up your skates in the professional sense doesn’t mean your involvement in hockey is over. ”
I furrow my brows in a frown. “What do you mean?”
“What if you started something like a foundation for underprivileged kids to play hockey? Kids just like you were. Think about how many kids are out there who have so much potential, but whose parents or caregivers can’t afford it.”
There’s a pang in my chest at the thought. I was fortunate that my mom never gave up. She saw something special in me. Saw the passion and dedication I had and did whatever she possibly could to ensure I had the means to keep playing, but not all kids get that opportunity .
And it’s not for a lack of trying. Some parents can’t physically do what my mom did, working three jobs and pouring every cent that wasn’t for rent or food into my hockey future.
I’m so fucking lucky to have my mom.
“There were a lot of kids like me growing up. It’s an expensive sport, and kids grow out of their equipment so quickly.” I chew on the corner of my lip. “I’m not very…personable, though.”
I’m not good with people, despite having been chosen as Captain. But that’s different. When it comes to hockey, I’m in my element, talking to guys already on the same wavelength.
I struggle with everything else.
“I don’t know how it would work. You’d probably need some legal advice, but you could hire someone to do the people-ing, and you could be as much or as little involved as you wanted.”
“Maybe I could speak with some of my sponsors, see if they would want to donate too.” My mind begins to run wild at all the possibilities.
“I could provide equipment and help pay for ice time, and it would be completely inclusive, since so many girls don’t get the same opportunities boys do.
” I slip my phone out of the pocket of my jeans and start to type in my notes app as the ideas rush to the surface.
“I could do like an age bracket. Five to seventeen or something, because if you’re picked up by a top NCAA college, you’ll usually get your equipment for free. ”
“There you go.” He squeezes my bicep, tipping his head up to face me, and flashes me a dazzling smile.
“I have no idea what you just said, but the passion in your eyes speaks volumes. Just because you’re not on the ice yourself doesn’t mean your impact on the sport has to end there.
Help pave the way for the next generation of superstars in honor of that little boy who never gave up. ”
Fuck. The stupid organ in my chest swells at his earnest expression. I lean down, pressing my lips to his in a sweet kiss. “You’re wonderful, you know that?”
“Well,” he drawls with a teasing grin. “I have my moments, but I’m not opposed to hearing it coming from you.”
I wrap my arms around his waist, reaching around as I slip my tongue into his mouth and swallow his soft moan as I squeeze the delicious globes of his ass.
“Ethan,” Jacob says in a hushed tone against my mouth. I raise my head slightly, trailing kisses down the column of his throat. “You’re being a barbarian in front of Jason.”
I chuckle quietly into his neck. I glance up at the marble statue and give a small nod. “I do apologize, Sir.” I turn back to Jacob. “Maybe the big cock myth is right because I do have a gluttonous appetite when it comes to you—and very little self-control.”
Jacob bites down on his bottom lip, smoothing his hand up my chest. “You’re insatiable, and I love it.”
I tug his lip between my teeth. “How soon can we get out of here, then?”
Jacob props his head on his fist, the index finger of his other hand tracing the lines of the tattoos on my arm. His cheeks are flushed pink from his recent orgasm. Dark blond hair damp with sweat.
We should probably take a shower, but I’m too worn out to move.
When we left the museum, we visited Harrods before working our way through various bakeries in Soho and Covent Garden. By the time we returned to the hotel, I was on such a sugar rush that I needed a nap, but it was worth every second.
Watching Jacob get so inspired by the different delicacies we tried, I knew I would break my diet every day to watch the way his face lit up the way it did.
After we napped together, we ordered room service, then devoured each other for dessert. Since that night of the wedding, I’ve become ravenous for him.
Starved.
And no matter how many times I taste him or fuck him, I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of Jacob. I wasn’t kidding in the museum earlier when I said I have a gluttonous appetite when it comes to him.
“Have you ever lost any of your teeth?”
I turn my head on the pillow to look at him, confused. “Don’t they do pillow talk in those sexy books you read, J?”
His mouth gapes. “You’ve been reading my books?”
“I haven’t read them, no.” I give him a wry grin. “But I may have flicked through some pages. I’ve gotta admit, no wonder you’re a little firecracker.”
He left one of his books on the kitchen counter the other day, and curiosity got the better of me. It was safe to say I was hard within a few pages, my mind replacing the two guys on the page with Jacob and myself. It had me slapping the book closed and hunting him down so I could make it real.
He ghosts his hand down my chest to where my soft cock rests against my thigh. He cups his hand around me and gives my junk a gentle squeeze.
I hiss between clenched teeth. “You need to give me time to recover. I’m ten years older than you, remember?”
“Mmm,” he lazily agrees, leaning in to nip my chin. “And aged like a fine wine.”
I choke out a laugh. “Okay, enough of that.” I roll over onto my side and slip my arm around his waist, pinching his ass. “I’ve lost my three front teeth,” I admit, baring my teeth and pointing to the ones in question.
His brows shoot up. “How did that happen?”
“I took a puck to the face.”
“Oh my god,” he gasps, his hand cupping my jaw. “Aren’t you scared they’ll come out again?”
“I have a flipper, so they just pop out. I lost the first one in the juniors. Then in my second year with the Thunder, I took a slap shot to the face and lost another two. I figured there was no point in getting them fixed until I retire in case it happened again.”
“How come I’ve never noticed this?”
“Because I don’t take it out around you.” I huff a laugh. “It’s not the most attractive thing, J.”
Jacob’s eyes sparkle with mischief. “Let me see.”
I raise my brows. “You want to see me without my teeth?”
He nods, more excited than I thought he would be at seeing me that way. Ian hated seeing me without my teeth in .
“Come on. I lived with my grandparents, both who had dentures. I’m used to seeing a gummy smile.”
I snort, shaking my head. I quickly pop them out, giving him a wide, toothy—or rather, tooth less —smile before putting them back in.
He grins, pressing a kiss to my lips. “I still think you’re the most handsome man I’ve ever seen.”
“Such a charmer.” I shake my head slightly, feeling my face heat under his compliment.
He runs his fingers through the hair on my chest, grazing his nails against my skin. “Just being honest. Plus, is it weird I kinda want to know what it would feel like to get a blow job from you without your teeth in?”
I burst into laughter.
He grins. “What?”
Shaking my head, I trail my lips up his neck and nip his lobe.
“Do you ever go to the games with Alex?”
He shakes his head. “No, I haven’t been to any. This sounds a little crazy, considering I’m laying in bed, naked, with you, but I haven’t had the best experience with guys who play sports.”
My body goes rigid. “What do you mean?”
“When I was in high school, I was bullied by some of the guys on the football team and a couple from the hockey team. I’ve always been smaller and quiet, and I was kind of a loner because nobody wanted to be friends with the kid whose parents died.
They saw me as weird, and they used to say some pretty awful things to me. ”
I rise up on my elbow, keeping my eyes locked on him. My jaw clenches as I try to squash the anger bubbling away inside me as he continues.
“They would push me around, or steal my lunch, or do things like knock my books out of my arms while I was walking down the stairs…” He sighs, “Basically, they were just assholes, but their size scared me. I knew they could really hurt me, and I wouldn’t have been able to protect myself, and that terrified me.
I didn’t fight back or report them because I was too afraid of what they would do. ”
“I’m so sorry that happened to you.” I cradle his jaw with my hand, smoothing my thumb over the curve of his lips. “If I’d been there, I would have broken their fucking legs if they laid a finger on you.”
He kisses the pad of my thumb and smiles.
“You were busy being a hockey superstar when I was in high school. They idolized you. They had photos of you in their lockers and everything,” he admits, laughing quietly.
“Alex and Blaine have invited me a few times, but I haven’t taken them up on it.
It took me a while to teach my brain that you guys weren’t going to hurt me, but every time I meet someone new, it’s like a wave of panic, even after all this time. ”
I noticed how his shoulders tensed up the first time when we filmed in the bakery. The subtle way Alex would comfort him. It pains me that he went through that, and that the aftermath of those kids’ actions still impacts him to this day.
I chew on the inside of my cheek, debating whether to ask the question that’s been playing on my mind. Taking a deep breath, I bite the bullet and ask, “Were you afraid of me when we first met?”
Jacob’s silence tells me everything, and my heart sinks into the pit of my stomach. He gives me a small smile, but it’s filled with sadness.
“Yes, but I think part of that fear was because I found you so damn attractive. You were a danger to me in a very different sense than those idiots in school. You were a danger to my heart.”