Chapter 34
Thirty-Four
What did Wyatt do to my cat?
I stand in the doorway, Nanners nowhere in sight, but my couch throw pillows are ripped to shreds and stuffing is all over the floor of my living room.
“Nanners?” I say into the quiet apartment. “Oh, devil kitty, where are you?” I close the door behind me. “Dr. Jekyll? Mr. Hyde? Where are you?” I walk through the stuffing and down the small hall to my bedroom, where I left her sound asleep this morning.
More stuffing. As well as scratches all over the post of my bed.
Fantastic.
And yet—there she is. Asleep, in her kennel, as if she had nothing to do with the destruction of my home.
Me: My cat is possessed.
Maggie: What does that mean?
Me: She used to sleep all the time. Now she destroys.
Maggie: She’s a kitten. She just needs to play.
Me: Tell that to my bedpost.
Maggie: You need to get her a scratching post.
I switch over to , and six seconds later…
Me: Done. It’ll be here in two days.
Me: Now… Can we talk about us?
Maggie: There is no us, Lucca.
Me: Except that there is.
Maggie: I’d like to keep my job.
Me: You mentioned that.
Maggie: A fling with Lucca Cruz just isn’t worth my job. My livelihood. My way of living.
Maggie: Do you get it yet?
Me: Fling?
Maggie: Is that really all you took from my text? I’m sure you’re great at… flinging. But it’s not worth my reputation, my career!
Me: Who said anything about a fling?
Maggie: Does Lucca do anything besides flings? Fran said you never even remember the names of the girls you date.
Me: Not true. Besides, we both know I have your name down. Margaret (Maggie) Bonita McCrae.
Maggie: That isn’t my middle name.
Me: It should be.
Me: Explain the fling.
Maggie: A noncommittal relationship. You know, two people who have fun for a brief period of time and then go on as if nothing happened. No attachments.
Me: I’d like to try attachments.
Maggie: Lucca! Stop it.
Me: What? You wanted honesty and forthrightness. I’m giving it.
Maggie: Nope. I never asked for honesty. I’d be thrilled if you’d stick to evasive and indirect.
Me: I can’t do that.
Maggie: Well, I can’t do this.
Me: Except that you want to.
Maggie: DON’T TELL ME HOW I FEEL.
Me: I’m not telling you.
Me: You also kissed me… which said a whole lot more than any of these texts. In fact, I vote we get together and talk about this in person.
Maggie: Not gonna happen.
Me: Because you’ll kiss me again?
Maggie: Because I’ll end up injuring you and you won’t be able to play in Saturday’s game.
Me: I don’t think so.
Me: I think you like me.
Maggie: I don’t.
Me: You kissed me.
Maggie: I was having an existential crisis.
Me: Let’s talk. Please?
Maggie: I have nothing to say.
Me: Well, I do.
Maggie: Push those thoughts right off a cliff and move on.
Me: I can’t do that.
I look up from my phone after reading the entire series of text messages from Maggie to Roman and Stella. I sit on Roman’s couch and peer into the faces of my best friend and his wife. “That was three days ago. She hasn’t answered me back since.”
“Wait. You got a cat?” Roman’s eyes have narrowed.
I scoff and roll my neck back to look at Roman’s cabin ceiling. “Is that really all you’re taking from this?”
“I’m sorry—I’m just surprised. You never said anything.” He shrugs.
“She’s a little gray devil cat. The next time you come by, you can see all the things she’s destroyed.” I swallow. “She’s adorable.”
Roman smirks.
“Honey, focus.” Stella taps his leg, her eyes on me. “You really like this woman, Lucca?”
“I really do,” I say.
“Well, you could always announce your impending marriage on national TV.” Stella breathes out a laugh.
“Not helpful.” Roman’s eyes dart to his wife with the smallest of glares.
“I mean, I could. Do you think that would work?” I look at Stella. At least she’s got ideas. “It would force her to speak to me.”
“Are you kidding me? Two months ago, you hated the woman. Now you’re willing to announce your marriage?” Roman stands. “I’m getting a drink. When I come back in here, maybe tone down the crazy.”
I glare at him. “Do I need to remind you—”
Roman groans. “You did not break any laws to help me!”
“Okay, do I need to remind you that you announced our future wedding to the world before you’d talked it over with me?” Stella rests one hand on her flat stomach. They say she’s three months along, but she doesn’t look any different to me.
Roman growls before disappearing into the kitchen.
Stella looks at me. “Marriage, Lucca? Come on.”
“I don’t want to get married. Not yet, anyway.” I sigh. “But I like her. I haven’t been out with a woman since we started to get to know one another.”
Stella leans forward, elbows on knees. “And for the first time in your life, you don’t want to see anyone else?”
I nod. “Yes. It’s strange. I can’t explain any of it.”
“It’s called falling.” She reaches out a hand, taking mine and squeezing my fingers. “Have you ever been in love, Lucca?”
I smirk. “Many, many, many, times.”
Stella leans back again, her hand resting on her abdomen. “Okay, let me adjust that question. Have you ever had feelings for one woman and one woman only?”
My brows cinch as I replay her question in my head. “I…”
I’m still thinking when Stella starts talking again. “You said you haven’t been out with another woman since you started talking to Maggie.”
My eyes widen. “I know. Crazy.”
“Not crazy.” She rolls her eyes with impatience. “That’s called only having feelings for one person. I don’t think you’ve ever been in love, Lucca. You’ve had a whole lot of fun. And sure, you like women. But these are sincere feelings. Nothing fleeting or paper-thin about it.”
I lean back and cross my legs, scratching through the bristles on my chin. Roman walks back into the room, but I ignore him. His wife is enlightening me with so much knowledge—about myself. “But so many women have been in love with me,” I say.
Roman scoffs out a growl and turns around to walk back into the kitchen.
“No, they haven’t,” Stella says. “Maybe they were infatuated with you. Strong, charming—”
“Handsome,” I say, helping her out.
“Yes, but those are surface-level feelings, Lucca. No one’s ever loved you because you’ve never given them enough time to. You get bored and move on.”
I hold up my hands. “I wouldn’t say I get bored.
More like sparks fade and then light somewhere else.
” I shrug. I’m not as shallow as she thinks.
And I’ve never wanted to be left again. Mom left.
Vovó stayed. But she’s right, I’ve never given a woman enough time to decide whether she wanted me for the long haul or not.
Maggie started out not liking me—we can only go up from there.
“And with Maggie?” Stella pats my knee, bringing me back to reality. “The spark is still there?”
“A spark?” I shake my head, slow and thoughtful. “Maggie isn’t a spark. She’s more like a fire blazing in the hearth.”