Chapter 9 #2
“I always loved animals, but the biggest motivator was my brother. He loved animals and storms. I wanted his legacy to live on somehow. We were supposed to do the rescue together. All of this was supposed to be a family business. The house I’m in, it was my parents’.
They had some of the property, but not all.
Eventually, the surrounding land went up for sale, and I knew it would be perfect for the rescue.
My friend, Kentucky, he owns Dead Man’s Ranch. He’s based in Kentucky.”
“Wait, but your name…”
He snorts. “Yeah, I know. Funny how that works, right? Well, Kentucky liked my pitch and bought the land. The rescue is bigger than ever now. I’m known across the country, but I’m mostly popular in the Midwest area.”
“What happened? To your brother?” Somehow, the complicated webs that are tangled inside Oklahoma start there.
I know he feels deeply. That much is apparent. With how he moves, speaks, and even looks at people. He wears so many emotions, and they play like movies in his eyes, his soul open to every harsh critic in the world. He’s constantly bare.
I slip my hand into his, intertwining our fingers. When he tightens his palm against mine, his black claws slightly scratch against my knuckles.
Oklahoma settles with a big exhale, tucking an arm behind his head. I glance over at him, his attention locked on the onyx sky. From this angle, I can see how long and curly his lashes are.
He’s beautiful, no matter how I look at him, no matter which form he allows to show.
“Banks was my best friend. He was the better part of me. I’m sure you can understand, with Ruka.”
I nod, not wanting to even think about what life would be like without my brother.
“Banks…” he shakes his head with a grin.
“He was the life of the party. He was loud and happy. He loved chasing. He was always so careful. Smart too. Smarter than me. He was meant to do more. I wasn’t a risk taker, and I’m not now.
I’m happy with a slow-paced life. I don’t need adrenaline.
Especially now.” He flips on his side, leaning his arm against the roof to prop himself up.
“I’ll never forget that day. The day he died.
I remember what the wind felt like, what the wheat sounded like, what the air held.
I remember it all. The wheat was static, the air was thick, the wind was warm. ”
I scoot closer to Oklahoma, wanting to comfort him. I press my hand flat against his chest, and he covers it with his.
“He was a storm chaser.”
“What?” That was the last thing I expected, and it explains so much about Oklahoma.
“Mmhmm,” he says with a nod. “He loved weather, like you.” He smiles at me.
“You’re a hell of a lot prettier, though.
” He skims my jaw again, touching me like he can’t get enough.
“This storm was a bad one. I wasn’t a chaser, but I knew that.
I picked up a lot of things hanging with my brother and his crew. ”
“The skies were black in the distance, and the thunder was so powerful, it shook the ground. He wanted to chase it, and I told him it was a bad idea. He loved bad ideas.” A sad smile twitches his lips before it turns into a frown.
“Back then, we didn’t have the technology available today. Tracking was a little harder.”
“Back then? How old are you? You can’t be over thirty or thirty-five?”
A small amount of cockiness overtakes him. He scratches the scruff on his face, and if I’m not mistaken, he blushes. Even with how dark it is, I’m close enough to see the changes. Including the fangs he hasn’t hidden yet and the scarlet hue in his eyes.
He is the most stunning man I’ve ever seen.
Whatever he is, I don’t care.
I’ve never felt safer.
“I’m fifty.”
My mouth drops open in shock. “Fifty? Wow! You look great for your age. My Dad isn’t much older than you.”
“Aw, Sugar, don’t say that. Don’t make me feel old.”
We laugh together in the quiet night, the tension between us lessening while something else—something hotter—gains strength.
“You’re not going to tell me how you’re fifty, are you?”
“Tomorrow.”
“You have to be careful about tomorrows,” I say, flipping onto my back to stare up at the constellations again.
“Why is that?” He readjusts too, keeping our hands interlocked, and his arm pressed against mine.
“They might not ever come.”
He says nothing, and I’m worried I crossed a line. “It’s why I hate storm chasers. It’s why it’s hard for me to wrap my mind around what you do. I told myself I was done with anyone who chased clouds.”
I slap his arm with a bit more force than I meant to. “Don’t be disrespectful. It’s more than chasing clouds. You make it sound like a waste of time when our data, my photos, the way we talk to our viewers, it all matters. It’s all about keeping people informed.”
“I know that,” he exhales, and I turn to see so many emotions gleam in his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s why when you first met me, you were so angry. You really do hate chasers, don’t you? Why do you live here, then? In the middle of Tornado Alley, seems to be the worst place to be for someone who is afraid of storms.”
He swivels his head, bright carmine daggers narrow at me. “You think that’s what it is? That I’m afraid of storms? Like I’m a child who needs to cover his head with a blanket when thunder rolls outside? No, no, that’s not why I hate storms.”
He gets to his feet, lacing his hands behind his head as he stares into space. Dropping his arms by his side. “You wouldn’t understand,” he mutters.
Flattening my hands on the roof, I push myself to stand. “Then, talk to me. Enlighten me.”
“I can’t.”
I grind my teeth together, impatience building next. “You can. You’re choosing not to, Oklahoma. There’s a difference.”
He charges at me, the red suns brighter somehow. I step back, afraid for the first time since meeting him. I tremble with fear.
Oklahoma stops midstep, devastation deflating his anger. His eyes shift into a familiar blue. “You’re afraid of me. I can smell it. Your fear.”
My heart thumps in wild, chaotic drums. “You took me by surprise, that’s all. You came at me fast. You don’t move like a normal person.” He’s fast and smooth with his motions, unlike humans, who have a clunkiness to them when they move.
He flexes his hands as if he is stopping himself from reaching out to me. “I’m not a normal person. You need to understand that.”
I groan, beyond annoyed at him. “You’re unbelievable.
You don’t think I know that? You don’t think I feel that?
That you’re different from anyone I’ve ever met?
Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid. I am here.
I’m trying to get to know you. It’s you who won’t let me!
” I shout at him, my voice carrying across the plains.
“I think it’s best if we call it a night.”
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” This time, I step forward, and my nearness causes his gaze to glow again. He can’t hide his reaction to me. “That’s.” I poke his chest. “Too.” I poke him a little harder. “Bad.” I shove him with both hands for good measure.
And he doesn’t move a muscle.
“I won’t let you quit. You don’t want to get close to anyone! You keep everyone at arm’s length. Everyone! Even your friends. The people who are always by your side. You have hidden yourself in grief.”
“I have lost myself in resentment!” he roars so loud, an animalistic, monstrous tone has gripped his words. “I have lost myself in rage. In sadness. I have lost myself because I am doomed to live a very long, unnatural life, while everyone around me dies and I stay the same.”
“I do not fear storms, Nariko. I hate them. With a burning fucking passion. I wait and wait and wait for one to finally take me. It never does. I should have died with my brother twenty years ago. Instead, I was made into something that outlives everything he comes to love. It’s a lonely life, and how I choose to manage it is no one’s business. ”
“It’s my business!” I yell, tears gathering in my eyes. “You’re my business.”
“And you’re mine!” Another animalistic growl leaves him, my soul awakening to his call.
I want to be. I want to be his.
The moonlight illuminates his shadow, the silhouette of his shoulders rising with every angry breath. “You’re all so reckless with your lives. I’ll never understand it.”
I keep my chin high, but my bottom lip betrays me as it quivers.
“It isn’t for you to understand. At least we live our lives.
At least we take risks. At least we make every second count.
You keep yourself on your ranch, all safe and sound,” I whisper with a hint of disparagement.
“Afraid to live life by allowing others to get close to you because you don’t want to lose anyone else. Loss is part of life.”
“Get back to me when it becomes all that your life is.”