Chapter 7
CHAPTER SEVEN
The thing about Cody was that he snuck in like smoke under a door, so subtly at first that Erika didn’t recognize that it— he —was already inside. Once there at Sweet Everything, she waved to Allison, the owner and most frequent operator who waved back. It felt simultaneously odd and not odd at all to be there with Cody having her cold brew latte with artificial sweetener, especially when Cody ordered the same thing.
“What she’s having works for me, too.”
Most vitally, this agreement she’d made with him to go get coffee meant nothing. It wasn’t a serious date. She was still in her scrubs, for mercy’s sake. How serious could this be?
“Then, Gabe bolts into the house, bare feet, naked butt, mud and all, right onto the pristine, brand-new white carpet.”
Erika hadn’t been paying the strictest amount of attention to Cody, but at that, she had to gape at him.
“You had a white carpet?”
“Stacey insisted on it. She was super into Do It Yourself home decorating shows back then. I warned her that it wasn’t a good idea to mix white carpet and a three-year-old boy, but she didn’t listen.”
Erika could imagine it, but she couldn’t help but trip over the other woman’s name. “Stacey is your son’s mother?”
“Yeah, she’s my ex. We were happy at first, but ultimately, it didn’t work out. We share custody, or we used to. Now that Gabriel’s of age, I suppose that’s no longer necessary.” He sat back in his seat as if pondering that as a revelation. “Life is funny, isn’t it? We had this big wedding and make all these promises to each other, only for it to fizzle away.”
“I have a husband,” she blurted out, and at his astonished look, added on, “A late husband.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“He is—was—the love of my life.”
Cody paused, regarding her carefully, for once utterly mute. It struck Erika that she’d gone out of her way to mention this, that she always did this when out with another man, as if spouting these words would absolve her of some sort of sin. As if being on a date, even though she couldn’t genuinely think of this that way, was cheating on Blake.
Erika knew she shouldn’t feel like that since this was nothing but two people having a cup of coffee.
“You look sad,” he remarked, his brows pinching in the middle. “I didn’t mean to make you sad. When did you lose him?”
She heard her father’s incredulous, Sixteen years, Erika , rebounding through her brain.
“A while ago, but it’s recent as far as my heart goes,” she replied. That much was certainly true.
Her hand had been resting on the table, and he clasped onto it as he said, “I’m sure that’s hard.”
“It is.” At last, someone willing to offer some sympathy. She didn’t know why so many of the people who knew her couldn’t seem to catch the memo. He squeezed her hand then, and she squeezed his back.
The only problem with this was that she couldn’t help noticing that his palm had become callused, likely due to the work he did, and feeling that coarseness against her skin was surprisingly intoxicating. Definitely welcome.
It also fit perfectly with his overall persona of being this rough and tough farmer man. He was rough and tough, yes. But also funny and self-deprecating. A father who obviously loved his son. Honest and forthright. She gazed into those sky-blue eyes with the russet brown starburst at the center.
He was indisputably handsome. Ridiculously so…
No. No, no, no . None of that mattered. Especially not that last one.
She released him, stretching out toward the napkin dispenser on their table to cover the action. Erika didn’t want to hurt Cody’s feelings, but she couldn’t lead him on, either. This wouldn’t be going anywhere. It couldn’t.
Fortunately for her, he changed the subject to dad jokes again, and once he started rattling them off, Allison came by, asking if they wanted dessert.
“Oh, yeah,” Cody nodded his head vigorously. “I’ve heard your black forest brownies are a must-have.”
“True,” Allison said, holding her head up with pride. She had every right to. Those brownies weren’t only delicious, they didn’t only sell well, those babies had won awards. Not just in local bake sales, either. A couple of years back, they’d come in first place during a Best of Montana contest.
But of course, Erika didn’t eat sweets. She had tried the brownies, though.
“They’re superb,” she told Cody.
He raised a couple of his fingers. “Two, please.”
Erika had just taken a sip of her cooling coffee, so although she tried to cancel her part of the order, the coffee went down the wrong pipe. She fell into a series of awful choking coughs that didn’t allow her to speak, and by the time she managed to get past the clog in her throat, Allison had disappeared into the back.
Too late to cancel.
Cody had stood to pat her back. “You all right?”
She made about a million different hand signals to indicate that she was, but Erika felt sure she was likely coming across like a chicken with its head cut off. Despite this not being a date, this wasn’t how she wanted to be seen.
Her face heating, she peered up at Cody. He was so tall. She’d noticed it as she strolled beside him earlier. Blake had been her height, but this farmer man had at least six inches on her. Maybe more. She wondered what it would be like to dance with him.
No, Erika, you are not thinking about that , she reprimanded herself. She fell into such a tizzy that she forgot all about how to cancel her order without it coming across as rude.
Technically, she could send it home with Cody. Yet when it arrived in front of her, smelling freshly baked and chocolatey, her mouth literally watered. And honestly, what harm could it really do? She could splurge just this once.
The instant the confection hit her tongue, Erika’s eyes rolled back into her head. The brownie melted like fudge as soon as she tasted it, the flavor weaving into her senses. If heaven above had a taste, this would be it.
Erika ate her dessert gradually bite by bite as Cody waxed poetic about his own admiration of it.
“Allison, this is the best dessert I’ve ever had, bar none. I’m not even kidding.”
“Thank you,” Allison said, even though Erika knew she heard such compliments all the time. “Enjoy.”
Cody started sharing more anecdotes about halfway through, and Erika listened to the resonant sound of his voice. A distant part of her recognized that she could easily close her eyes and listen to him forever. His intonation was so soothing but not the type that would lull her asleep. She wondered what he’d sound like reciting poetry, then felt her cheeks heat again.
Why was she thinking such outrageous things? This was why she shouldn’t have sugar. Not when she seemed to be having such an extreme reaction to it.
She and Cody continued to sit there and talk, and Erika had laughed at his stories and jokes so often that her stomach now felt sore. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had such a good time or anywhere close to this much fun.
“Okay, you two, I hate to break up the party, but it’s closing time,” Allison announced, and Erika goggled at her in shock. Spinning to look outside, she noticed that yes indeed, it was dark outside. When she retrieved her cellphone, she could see that it was five minutes until nine. That meant they’d been there for three hours .
How was such a thing even possible? It felt more like three minutes.
“You probably have an early morning,” Cody assumed, and he was right.
“You probably do, as well.”
“True,” he said, his mouth raising into a reluctant smirk. One she believed to be because of their need to separate and go home.
She didn’t want to.
He escorted her out to her car, his hand resting ever so lightly along the small of her back. Then, once she was situated in her driver’s seat, he kept talking as if loathe to end their time together.
Ultimately, though, he grasped her hand again.
“Thank you for agreeing to go out with me.”
A part of her almost denied it out loud, almost declared that this hadn’t been a date, but in the end, her protest went unsaid.
“Thank you for the latte and brownie. You should know that I usually avoid sugar, though.”
She expected some type of counterargument like most people gave her, but he didn’t do that.
“I try to, too. But sometimes, like tonight, indulging a little is acceptable. How about next time we go to dinner?”
“I think I could handle that.”
“Say Saturday at six?”
“That would work.”
He took her hand, squeezed it briefly, and let it go. Cody began to back away from her, offering her a smile. “Until this coming Saturday at six, then, Erika Cantrell.”
Then, swiveling on the heel of his cowboy boot, he climbed into his truck. She started her ignition and drove home, warmed by the fact that he stayed right behind her until it was time for him to veer off, presumably to go to his own residence. He even caught her eye and waved at her before making the turn.
Erika floated home unable to think about anything but Cody. How he moved through the world. How his expressions changed as he talked. How good his concentrated attention on her made her feel.
It’d been since Blake was alive that she felt anything similar. And for the first time, she had to admit to herself that not only did she miss Blake, she missed the handholding and the feeling of being held. She missed being hugged and kissed by him. She missed the sensation of being the center of a man’s attention.
One thing she knew for sure was that she’d been the center of Cody’s attention. He hadn’t been over the top about it or anything, but she’d never once doubted that all his concentration had been on her.
She slept like a baby that night and was still on a high all Tuesday morning. She waited on her patients, taking blood pressure and basic vital signs, the hours drifting by with her thoughts frequently returning to Cody.
It wasn’t until she was about to leave for lunch that Callie pounced on her like a mountain lion. “You and me are going to lunch. Right now,” she said, gripping her by the elbow and basically kidnapping her as Callie led her out the door.
They were allowed to leave the building, of course, but it was more typical for Callie to place some sort of order for the four of them and have it delivered. It was only then that Erika realized that her friend hadn’t done that today.
“All right, spill,” the office manager demanded of her.
“Spill what?”
“Spill whatever transpired with the farmer.”
Erika chose to play dumb. Her time with him felt special. Almost sacred, even. She didn’t know if she was ready to share it yet.
“You mean Cody?”
“Of course I mean Cody. All those cards, and then him showing up out of the blue. Please tell me you finally said yes to him.”
Erika busied herself with watching the barely existent traffic that motored along the street. A minivan with a cargo container on the top and a bike rack on the back went by, everything about them screaming that they had to be tourists. Not that they received all that many of those. Rocky Ridge tended to be too far off the beaten path for anyone but locals to travel here.
“Well?” Callie prompted her again, and Erika knew keeping this to herself would be useless. Particularly since she and Cody had gone to such a well-known establishment.
“We may have stepped out for some coffee.”
“Stepped out for some coffee,” her friend squealed like a thirteen-year-old as she repeated the words. Her over the top behavior had Erika also breaking her composure. Yet the only thing she felt comfortable saying about it seemed to disappoint Callie.
“It was… nice.”
“Nice? Like describe what you did.”
Erika did, explaining how Cody regaled her with jokes and stories. How time seemed to pass in an instant.
“Looking at you going all dreamy-eyed.”
She frowned at Callie. “I’m not dreamy-eyed.”
“You most certainly are. And I’m so proud of you for getting out of that cocoon you’ve encased yourself in.” The office manager almost seemed smug.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, you’ve been keeping yourself in this tight little cocoon, a gloomy one if you don’t mind me being honest. It’s so great to see you break free of it and fly.”
Erika considered this. Was that what she’d done last night? Break free? But what could she be breaking free of? The concept of acting disloyal to Blake smacked her across the face, and she felt horrible. Guilty, even.
Dismay and regret dogged her for the rest of the day.