Chapter Thirty-Eight
Zinn
Zinn stared at the two pink lines on the stick. He hadn’t had any serious doubts about the results, but the confirmation still made his breath catch.
He’d told Calder last night after they left Assa and Wes’s house that he would take the test this morning, and Calder had respected his wishes to do so alone.
With everything going on, the apartment was as much Zinn’s refuge as it had ever been.
They had discussed whether he should move in with Calder at some point, and Zinn felt like he’d be ready to live together before the baby came, but for now, he preferred taking things slow.
He thought he was probably already in love with Calder, considering he had no problem telling Assa and Wes that the man was his alpha. It was just difficult to trust it. He had been so wrong about Valentin.
But Calder wasn’t Valentin.
Calder had kissed him tenderly last night, saying how proud he was of the way Zinn had handled everything with the Pashuks. He told Zinn that he understood his need for space and left him with the reminder that he was there if Zinn needed him.
“I love you, sunshine,” he said. “And I’m so thankful you’ve been reunited with your son.”
“Assa and Wes’s son,” Zinn corrected him.
“No, my omega. You don’t have to do that.
Yes, he’s their son, but you’re his birth father, and those men seemed perfectly willing to give you that title.
I realize you don’t want to diminish the relationship they have with Ryde.
And you want to set their minds at ease so they won’t be scared to let you in his life.
Of course they are his fathers, but you have a place here too. ”
“I hope so… Stars, I hope so.”
“We’ll figure it out, but not right this minute.” Calder hugged him close. “That’s why they invited us to dinner next week to talk about how to introduce you to Ryde. Not whether they would. It gives everyone a few days to take a breath, but they understand you don’t want to wait too long.”
“I noticed that too. Like, it’s already a given that they’re okay with me meeting my son. Only the how is in question.”
“Assa and Wes are good people. This is going to work out.”
“Other things are going to work out too.” Zinn grinned. “I can’t wait to text you in the morning after I take the test.”
Calder’s eyes lit up, and he kissed Zinn on the nose. “I’ll be waiting for it.”
Twelve hours later, Zinn held the evidence of his pregnancy in his hand.
It was surreal that it was happening at the same time he’d finally met his first child.
This new baby would have what Zinn hadn’t been able to give Valentin’s son.
This boy would have an alpha father, an omega father. And three brothers.
The pink lines seemed to stare back at him. Zinn, Calder, Wes, Assa…and Valentin. They were all connected now.
Zinn picked up his phone and had just finished texting Calder the good news when a message coming through startled him.
It was from Assa. I’d like to drop something off for you, but don’t want to overwhelm you if you need some space.
Zinn chortled. The last thing he wanted was space from the Pashuks.
He was going to be on edge until they could hash out the details of setting up a time when he could meet Ryde. He texted Assa his address.
The beta arrived twenty minutes later. His hair seemed lighter with the sun behind it. Flecks of gold shimmered among the red strands.
“It’s only me,” Assa said. He breezed in as if they hadn’t met less than a day ago. “Wes had an emergency staff meeting at the university. I was prowling around the house getting these together—” he held up a tote bag “—and decided to take a chance and text you.”
“I’m glad,” Zinn said. “When Calder dropped me off last night, I thought I wanted time alone to decompress. But I miscalculated. I was usually on my own growing up and I’m still getting used to wanting to be around people. Can I get you anything to drink?”
“Tea?”
“Chamomile okay?”
At Assa’s nod, Zinn flipped on the kettle in the kitchenette. Assa sat on the small couch, resting the bag by his calves.
“Wes is a professor, right?” Zinn asked.
“He’s the assistant dean in the history department, so he doesn’t teach many classes. Mostly he does administrative stuff. That’s how we ended up in Bellwether. For his job.”
“And you work on campus too?” Zinn tried to recall what Calder had told him about the couple.
“Mm-hmm. I was a stay-at-home father with Ryde until we moved. But I work in one of the labs now. Have you heard of Dayson Bannon?”
“The omega scientist who sued to operate a heat service?”
“Right. About ten years ago, he won that big case. But before that, he worked at the university. I’m a tech in the lab he established to conduct research on omega heats.”
Zinn’s jaw ticked. “Thank you for that. I’ve had some painful and terrifying heats in my life, and I wouldn’t wish them on anyone.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. If there’s one thing the past few months has taught me, it’s that everything happens for a reason.” Zinn poured boiling water into their mugs and sat down next to Assa. “Do you want to hear another wild coincidence?”
“Of course. We haven’t had enough of those this week.”
Zinn laughed. “You mentioned Dayson Bannon’s case from ten years ago. Calder’s older son, Jordie, is boyfriends with Kino McGinn. Kino’s father, Teal, was Dayson’s lawyer.”
“That is something,” Assa said. “Teal is one of the state’s most famous omegas.” An odd look crossed his face. He took a deep breath before adding, “The McGinns are also well known for being part of a polycule.”
Zinn flinched. Assa didn’t seem like a judgmental traditional values person, but he supposed there was a chance he’d misread him.
“Yes,” Zinn spoke carefully, sensing Assa’s continued scrutiny.
“Are you concerned that if I get to know Ryde, he’ll be around Kino?
I can’t imagine it would be difficult to prevent that, but honestly, I’ve met several of his fathers, and they’re all great…
But if it’s a problem, I can make sure none of the McGinns interact with him.
” He rolled his lips inward. “I understand polyamory is unusual, but they are lovely men and I promise it won’t be an issue. ”
Assa’s expression softened and he barked a laugh. “Zinn, are you questioning whether I have something against non-monogamy?”
“I hadn’t thought about it until a minute ago, but then your face got all weird when I mentioned the McGinns.”
“Trust me. I have zero issues with their polycule.” Assa released another small chuckle.
“Oh. Okay,” Zinn said, bewildered.
“Then I take it you don’t have a problem with polyamory?”
Zinn pffted. “After everything I went through, I don’t have a problem with anyone doing whatever they fucking want, as long as it doesn’t hurt other people.
” He clenched his mug. “I spent so many years under my parents’ rule, then had my baby taken from me.
” He took a measured sip. “Now, by some miracle, I’m able to have a new life with Calder.
It’s made me realize that sometimes grabbing happiness requires bravery.
It’s not always straightforward. I wouldn’t judge the McGinns for loving more than one man any more than I’d want to be judged for moving on after what my fathers did to me.
Just like I wouldn’t look down on an omega without a partner, or two alphas who wanted to be together.
” Assa nodded and Zinn puffed out another breath.
“I’ve spent a good chunk of the last decade being miserable.
I can’t imagine denying anyone the chance to find joy. Whatever that looks like.”
Assa put his hand on Zinn’s knee. “I’m sorry you were unhappy for so long.
You’re an amazing person,” he said. Placing his mug on the coffee table, he leaned in close to Zinn, practically nose-to-nose.
“In all the years I imagined what Ryde’s omega father might be like, I wondered if you’d be nice, and smart…
if you’d look like him, be creative like him.
But I never stopped to think about how much I’d like you myself. How much I’d admire you.”
Warmth crept across Zinn’s cheeks. “You don’t have to say that.”
“I do.” Assa locked their gazes. “It’s too bad Wes isn’t here, because this is something we’ve both been anxious about, but I think it’s the right moment to tell you…he and I are poly.”
Zinn blinked. “Oh.” He cast his eyes down, staring at Assa’s hand on his knee. “Polyamorous?”
“Yes.” Assa’s mouth held the hint of a smile. “After everything you just said, it would have felt disingenuous not to own it. We aren’t part of an established polycule, but we sleep with other men occasionally. And we’re open to whatever that evolves into.”
“Oh,” Zinn repeated. For some reason, this had never occurred to him. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
“I mean, yeah? If that works for you. Not really my business, but thanks for telling me, I guess.”
“You guess?” Assa smiled wider.
“Yes…wait, I mean, no.” Zinn shook his head. “I don’t have an issue with it.”
On the contrary, the idea sent a shiver cascading down his spine.
He understood why Assa had told him, especially after he'd provided such an obvious opening, but now all he could think about was the beta couple with other men. They had had bigger issues going on last night, but he wasn’t blind.
He’d noticed how beautiful the couple was, so of course his traitorous brain had to paint pictures now.
“I’m relieved it doesn’t bother you,” Assa said. “Even though it was consensual, our non-monogamy was the reason we had trouble listing with the adoption agencies in Warburton.”