Chapter Ten
Oaklynn
W ALKING IN MY cottage after shopping with Marie and Melissa, my heart started racing when I found Rooster and Jace inside. Jace used his key to the door I gave him in case of emergencies. They took me straight to the room I chose as a nursery and I started to cry. The guys had painted the room a soft yellow and it was full of furniture. The curtains were even hung over the two windows in the room. From there, they carried in every single bag we brought back from the store while I walked around and examined the furniture. Every detail was perfect and I could easily imagine my son or daughter laying in the crib sleeping. Or me rocking them in the chair in front of one of the windows in the middle of the night. In my mind, I even added decorations on the walls and saw all of the little clothes folded or hanging up in the closet and the toy box filled with toys. There were books on a small bookshelf in my mind’s view of the room. They made my nursery perfect and more than I could ever imagine it being. Jace hugged me close and let me cry as the other three disappeared from the room to give me some space.
Once they all left me alone, I pulled out all the baby clothes with the new detergent I got specifically for them and started washing them all so I could put them away in the room. Everything was so tiny and precious. Including the one little girl and boy outfit I bought in order to bring my little one home. Those went in the bag I’d be taking to the hospital with me so I’d have them on the day I was able to bring my little one home. While I was washing everything, I took a few pictures of the furniture and sent them to my aunt. She called me back and we talked about it for a while and she promised me she’d come for a visit once I had the baby and was home. She wanted me to get into a routine and be comfortable before she showed up but was excited to meet the baby. It was good to hear her happy and settled for the first time since my uncle passed away. I think moving to be with his sister was the right move for her. Just like moving to Frostford was the right move for me. Even if it hurt to know Omen was so close and yet I’d never be able to go near him again.
That was a few days ago and tonight Melissa is dragging me to the county fair. It’s here for a week and she’s excited to take the kids for a while. This is her attempt at getting me out of the house so I’m not sitting and getting lost in my head. Melissa knows me better than anyone else because that’s exactly what I’ve been doing on a daily basis. Now that it’s so close to the day I’ll go into labor and have my little one, the fear and nervousness is starting to build up inside me. I’m scared that I won’t be able to push out my little one and will end up having to have surgery. Or that something will be wrong when I do have him or her. I’ve had nightmares about being alone and no one showing up or something terrible happening to me and the baby. These occur nightly and no matter what I do, they won’t stop. Plus I have dreams about Omen and the knowledge that he won’t ever get to know his son or daughter. I’ll have to figure out how to let the people close to me, including his parents, see the baby while making sure he doesn’t have to be in the same room or area as them. It’s going to be hard, but I’ll figure something out once I have to truly worry about that.
After showering and dressing in maxi dress, that’s all that seems to fit me these days, I brush my long hair and throw it up in a messy bun. It’s hot today and I don’t want it hanging down over my neck and back making me even hotter than I already am. I don’t bother putting on any makeup because it will just melt right off. Not to mention, I hate wearing makeup and now that I’m pregnant, it’s even worse. So, I don’t give a fuck about wearing it and today is no different. Especially considering I’m not exactly going out in search of a guy to start talking to. Even if I were interested in finding a guy to be in my life, not many would be willing to get in a relationship with a woman as pregnant as I am. Plus, I doubt I’ll be able to find someone who could even begin to compare to Omen.
By the time I’m done getting ready for a night out with my best friend and her family, I’m exhausted. Everything I do takes so much energy these days and I’m ready to collapse on the couch and take a long nap. Maybe I should’ve gotten ready earlier so I could be ready to go out when they get here. Instead, I waited until the last minute and now I don’t want to go out at all. Melissa won’t let me stay home though. If anything, she’d go rent a wheelchair from somewhere just to push me around and take me out with them. In fact, she threatened me with something like that if I didn’t promise to go with her. So, I head to the kitchen and grab a bottle of water to drink. Looking around the room, I realize I need to go shopping. The food from the diner is gone and I have almost nothing here to eat. Especially when it comes to snacks and other things I crave in the middle of the night. I’ll have to take care of that tomorrow or something.
“Bitch, where are you?” Melissa asks, breaking me out of my thoughts as I look toward the front door.
“I should take back my key,” I mutter while putting the cap back on my water and turning to face her.
“No, you shouldn’t. Someone needs to be able to get in here in case there’s an emergency. I know there’s one other person with a key to the door but you guys are keeping it a secret so a certain asshole doesn’t find out because there’s no reason for him to be jealous or anything. Zeke and the kids are waiting. Are you ready to go?” Melissa asks me, watching as I yawn and try to cover it with my hand. Concern fills her face.
“I’m okay. I just finished getting ready to head out. I’m sure you remember how exhausted you used to get at the later stages of your pregnancy. Granted, I’m only carrying one baby and not two, but everything I do still tires me out. That’s why I’m in here and not sitting on the couch because I knew if I sat down, I’d fall asleep,” I tell her, my voice showing how tired I am as another yawn escapes.
“Are you sure you should go? I don’t want you walking all over the fairgrounds if you’re gonna be this tired,” Melissa asks me, stepping further into my cottage as I start walking over to her.
“I’m going. You didn’t give me a choice in the matter when you started talking about it so I’m not backing out now. I’ll be okay once I get to the fair. Hopefully there’s some kind of breeze so the heat doesn’t make this shit worse,” I tell her, grabbing my bag and making sure my keys and phone are inside before we head out and I lock the door behind us.
Melissa and I get in her new SUV with me sitting in the front seat since it’s easier for her to move around the car seats of the twins. She’s used to moving around the car seats even though she’s even more pregnant than I am. Homicide gives me a nod but doesn’t say anything as he watches his wife through the rearview mirror. He doesn’t hesitate to take off and head for the fair as Melissa chats excitedly about everything she wants to do with the twins while we’re there. This will be their first time and I can’t wait to see how excited they get over all the lights, colors, and sounds they’ll get to experience at the fair. I’ve always loved seeing people experience things for the first time no matter what it is. To see someone’s true reaction to something happy and amazing is like seeing pure innocence in the world again. Especially when it’s through the eyes of a child.
***
H omicide pulls up to a field that’s filled with cars, trucks, and SUVs of all kinds. Some of them are new and shiny in the bright sunlight while others are rust buckets that look ready to fall apart from the slightest gust of wind. He parks close to the entrance as I look around and spot the row of bikes parked against the fence. Without being able to see them up close, I know it’s the guys from the club. Though, if I’m being honest, I wouldn’t expect them to be anywhere other than here. Especially if Homicide told them he was bringing Melissa and the twins here today. They’d be here in case something happened with so many people in one area. It’s what they do for one another and I’m glad he found this club and people to call his family. If anyone deserves it, it’s Homicide.
We all get out of the SUV and I watch as Melissa and Homicide put the twins in some kind of double stroller. They stuff a bag full of stuff in the back before we head to the front gate and pay to get inside. My best friend walks slowly with me while her man walks behind us to keep an eye on everything. I know he won’t push the stroller because that will make his hands full and if I know one thing about the man Melissa loves more than anything in the world, it’s that he’ll always do what’s needed to protect his family and that means keeping his hands free from the stroller. Yeah, he’ll hold his children and play with them but rarely when we’re around so many people like this. For him, he’s in full protection mode and that’s how he’ll always be.
I look at the twins and see the large smiles on their faces as they look around the fair. Their eyes are wide as they listen to all the sounds surrounding them while taking in the rides, games, and happy people. Music fills the air from one of the rides while the scent of various foods and drinks permeates the entire area. My mouth waters from the scent of all the food. I look around after taking my attention from the twins and find a tent selling barbeque chicken and everything that goes with it. Looking at Melissa, I point to the tent and let her know I’m heading there for some food. Without leaving me alone, my best friend follows as I stand in line to get tickets for the delicious smelling food.
Buying tickets for all of us to get food, we move over to a new line to wait for our food.
“Is this your first time at a fair? I mean other than the last one we went to before you moved to live with your aunt and uncle,” Melissa asks me as I hand over our tickets for food and drinks and answer the workers questions.
“Yeah. I mean, I went out and had fun, but I never went to a fair with anyone. I knew I’d never have as much fun with anyone else as I did with you. There are just some things that you know won’t ever compare to when you’ve done it in the past. I mean, it was always fun and we did nothing but laugh when we went to fairs growing up. With someone else, I’d probably have a good time, but it wouldn’t be the same as when we used to go together. I’d get upset thinking of everything we used to do and how much fun the two of us had,” I answer her honestly as we get two trays of food set down in front of us.
Homicide moves in to take the trays from us before following us to the closest picnic table. He leaves long enough to grab two highchairs someone brought here for the kids so they can eat with us. Once they get the kids settled and ready for dinner, we dig into the food and I watch as my best friend feeds her children. They love the meat, potatoes, and rolls they’re given, devouring every bite of food placed in front of them without hesitation.
“So, what do you want to do first?” Melissa asks, as we clean up the garbage from the meal and load it back onto the trays to dispose of.
“Whatever you guys plan on doing. I’m not picky and will go along with anything you want to do,” I answer her knowing this is more about the twins than any of us.
“What about a few games so we can let the food settle in their stomachs before we do anything else?” Homicide suggests, his voice softer than normal as he talks to his wife and looks at her as if she’s the center of his world like normal.
“That sounds good. I think the games for kids are down at the other end,” I point out, not paying attention to much of anything as we turn around and head for the games while passing food trucks of cotton candy, fried dough, and all sorts of other food and drinks.
For the next hour, the twins laugh and let out happy squeals as they pick those rubber ducks out of water to win prizes. We toss rings over bottles and Homicide wins each twin a giant stuffed animal as they laugh while holding them close. We play that game where you have to squirt water into a little hole to make some kind of animal race across the length of the wall. Of course Homicide also wins that game as loud laughter fills the air around us and I can’t help but turn and look to see who’s making a commotion.
As I let my eyes drift over the area, they land on a group of guys from the club. Jace and Omen are standing among the group as they talk, laugh, watch all the women around them, and drink their beer. I know they’ll only have one drink while they’re here so they remain alert and can ride their bike home. My eyes land on Omen as I take him in from head to toe.
Tonight he’s wearing a black tee-shirt that stretches tight across his chest. His cut is worn over his shirt allowing the ink on his arms to be on full display. Dark jeans hug his thick legs and his standard boots cover his feet. He’s standing toward the back of the group with his arms crossed over his chest and a beer held in his hand. His eyes are constantly moving as he scans the area surrounding them. When he looks in our direction, I immediately turn my attention back to the game in front of me and realize I’m back at the beginning because I haven’t been paying attention. Melissa is laughing her ass off as Homicide scowls because he just lost to a kid who can’t be more than ten years old. Meanwhile, the twins are clapping in the stroller while I feel a set of eyes watching my every move.
“I’m done with games,” Homicide pouts after accepting his defeat and standing from the stool he’s been sitting on. “Let’s take the kids on a few rides so we can get them their fried dough. Not gettin’ cotton candy when they’re this little.”
This is an argument they’ve had daily over the last week. Melissa wants them to experience every single thing about the fair. I get where she’s coming from, but the twins don’t need to be completely hyped up on a treat that’s nothing but sugar. So, I happen to agree with Homicide and Melissa knows this. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that I’ve never really liked cotton candy. I’d rather have a piece of fried dough over any of the other delicious treats a fair has to offer.
After buying tickets for the rides, we make our way over to the small section with rides specifically for the kids. Melissa has talked to her doctor about going on a few of the slower rides like a carousel and gotten the approval. Once again they’re clapping their hands and laughing as we get closer to the merry go round. Melissa and Homicide get the kids out of the stroller while I stand back and watch them get on and prepare to take the twins on their first ride. They’re going on a carousel Pulling out my phone, I once again feel eyes watching me and know without turning around it’s Omen. The guys will follow us around the fair for safety reasons as they normally do. No one is ever left alone as they go out in public in a crowded area like this.
For each ride the kids are on, I take a million pictures. Especially for the ones Homicide and Melissa go on. These moments are memories in the making and if I can help record them for the couple I’ve known for years, then that’s what I’ll do. The kids love each ride and don’t once show an ounce of fear as they experience each one for the first time. I think that comes down to how well Melissa and Homicide are raising them and have protected them since they were born. They always know Homicide is there to catch them if they fall and it won’t ever change. That’s how I want my child to be raised and it’s what I’ll do regardless of Omen’s role in our child’s life.