Chapter 39
MELLY
I had to admit, I liked giving a blow job much more than I expected. The idea of a man’s dick in my mouth and then swallowing thick cum had never been arousing. Could I take it all? Would I gag or even throw up because it was too much for me to handle? Would it taste funny?
When I reached across the truck and opened Daniel’s jeans, I hadn’t thought of any of that. Not when I licked that broad head like a lollipop or sucked on him or even swallowed as spurts of his cum hit my tongue.
No. It had been hot because Daniel had lost control. The big, growly guy had been reduced to involuntary hip shifts, hand clenched in my hair and a profuse amount of swearing.
Deeper, bad girl.
Fuck, that’s your throat.
Such a good little cock sucker.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT, THAT’S AMAZING.
Take it all.
Swallow.
Fuuuuuucccckkk.
Melly.
I did that to Daniel. The lumberjack. Me.
ME!
I felt powerful and aroused and so pleased with myself.
Daniel’s head was tipped back on the headrest. Eyes closed. If the corner of his mouth wasn’t tipped up, I wasn’t even sure he was awake. His chest heaved still, sweat dotted his brow and his dick was still out. While it was softening, it was still impressive.
Rolling his head, he looked to me. “All right, sweet girl. What was that all about?”
I bit my lip, suddenly unsure. “Um, a blow job. Did I do it wrong?”
He huffed. “If you did it any more right, I’d be dead. But what a way to go.”
I sighed, relieved.
“You didn’t just have a hankering to suck dick. I think it’s time we talk.”
“Talk?”
He studied me and shifted to tuck himself back in his jeans and zip up. “I see you squirming which means your pussy aches. I’ll take care of you when we get to my place, but I want to know about your mom.”
I looked at my hands folded in my lap. “Okay.”
He reached out, took one.
“The other day, you said your mom pushed a man on you.”
I nodded.
“Did he touch you? Did he–”
I shook my head and looked up at him. His gaze had been softened by his orgasm, but his voice and body were tense.
“No. Nothing happened.” I sighed again. “I lived here in Hunter Valley with my mom until I was sixteen. You know her history with the men in town.”
He nodded.
“She met a man, Carl, and we moved to be with him in Idaho. Carl had an… interest in me right from the start and Mom was okay with it.”
His hands went to the steering wheel and strangled it. His knuckles were white.
“When I turned eighteen, they pretty much offered me the opportunity to lose my virginity. To have some fun.”
“With this Carl guy,” he growled. Realizing he was murdering his truck, he loosened his hold and took my hand again.
I nodded. “Yes. I didn’t want that so I left. Came back here to live with my grandmother.”
He kissed my fingertips. “You’re right. Carl was a predator and your mom couldn’t see it. I’m proud of you for getting out of there. Is that why you never had sex?”
I shrugged. “I guess. At first, but then I never found a guy that interested me.”
“Until me.”
“Until you,” I confirmed.
“And the boundaries are because your mother clearly has none.”
“Right.”
“And you freaked when I said sex was fun because that’s what your mom taught you sex was. Only fun. I think you said something about it being interchangeable.”
“Yes. And that relationships aren’t something I want.”
He cocked his head, as if surprised by that even though I told him I didn’t want one. “Because you don’t want the kind your mom has.”
“Exactly. What about you?” I countered, licking my bottom lip. I had the taste of him on my tongue still. “You obviously had a relationship with Danny’s mom. Any others?”
“I was nineteen when I was with Haven. Danny’s mom.
It was a teenage relationship which was pretty much hanging out and having sex.
We had zero intention of having a child, but birth control isn’t foolproof.
She bailed. Danny’s the best thing in my life and I wouldn’t change having him for anything. ”
“But no relationships.”
He shook his head and frowned. “I got derailed by that one. I wasn’t letting it happen again.”
And he still wasn’t. Especially now that he sold his business and Danny was all grown up. “Because your life plans got changed when you had him and now, finally, you get to live them.”
“Exactly.” He huffed out a breath. “College isn’t happening now, but the other things on my bucket list are.”
I knew he didn’t mean for those words to hurt, but I felt them. I wasn’t a life plan. I wasn’t on his bucket list. I was temporary.
Temporary was what I wanted. How could I want more from a man who wasn’t going to be here?
I wasn’t going to Scotland or wherever else he roamed.
I couldn’t feel things for someone else who walked away.
My father left. Mom left. Sure, she came back, but didn’t see me for who I was.
She didn’t understand that the meals and the job and living still in my grandmother’s house was all because she pretty much messed with my head?
I craved consistency, constancy, and permanence.
If I wasn’t getting it from those who were supposed to care for me, then I had to provide it for myself.
The orgasms with Daniel were amazing, but it would be back to me and my drawer of sex toys soon enough. I’d given myself pleasure before, I could do it again.
Daniel didn’t need to get stuck in Hunter Valley like he had over twenty years ago. He’d soon resent me.
“Like your parents, mine aren’t great role models either,” he added. “My dad divorced my mom when I was eight because he fell for his secretary. They got married and had Sea Bass, Saint, and Seth.”
I had to smile. “Why do you call Sebastian, Sea Bass?”
He smirked. “Saint and Seth couldn’t say his full name. They only got half of it and it stuck.”
“So Sebas to Sea Bass? Does he even like to fish?”
“He does.”
Huh.
We were perfectly defective together. I had no idea what a real relationship looked like and well, neither did he. Not if his dad dumped his mom with Daniel and Deek to start a second family. It wasn’t swinging, but his dad certainly made relationships seem interchangeable.
“I meant it when I said you’re staying with me. I don’t want you in that house with those two.”
“Yes.”
He nodded once, probably expecting me to argue. “Good. Then let’s get to my place so I can see to that needy pussy of yours.”
“What about Danny?”
Danny was really upset and that confrontation the day before had been really embarrassing. Caught by his brothers was one thing, but Danny? Gah.
“We didn’t do anything wrong. He needs to realize–”
“That his dad might have sex with his woman?” I winced. “Kinda sounds familiar.”
He frowned. “You said you went on two dates. Daytime ones.”
“We didn’t even kiss,” I said, making sure he knew how not-serious it had been.
“Then there’s no comparison between us and the swinging your mom does. Rule number one, remember. I don’t share.”
“But Danny–”
“Had no chance with you,” he finished. “Right?”
Did I want Danny now? No. Had I ever wanted him? No.
“Right.”
“You’re not your mom.” Reaching out, he stroked my cheek. “I choose you and only you. Now let me take you home and fuck you to remind you who you belong to.”
He chose me. Only me.
For now, and only now.