Chapter 61
GEORGIA
Mac knocked on the door, then came in, not waiting for me to answer.
I was in the little apartment over his garage, packing.
The fireplace was on because the temperature dropped since yesterday.
So much for spring. I’d never used a fireplace before since they weren’t found in many houses in Georgia.
But I liked how cozy it made a space, even over-the-garage apartments and electric versions.
He took in the room as if assessing the scene of an emergency. My room did look like there had been an explosion since my clothes were everywhere. “What are you doing?”
I found one of the suede boots Mac despised behind the reading chair and tossed it into the open suitcase. “Packing.”
“You’re leaving?” he asked. He looked surprised, as if that was even a possibility. Not that we hadn’t talked about it ever since we first hooked up. My departure was always a constant reminder, even when we were naked.
I found a rogue sock and added it to the pile. And, shit, there was my vibrator peeking out from beneath a shirt. I covered it up. Then I looked to him. He was in his uniform, which fit him so perfectly. Snug button-up with his chief badge. Biceps bulged from beneath the short sleeves.
I knew that belt well, the one that circled his trim waist. And those sturdy legs. And what was between–
I swallowed, suddenly feeling overwarm. A constant condition around him.
“Yes, but don’t worry. Your dad took Andy to his house for the night. Said Ralph would pick them both up and take Andy to school. There was something in there about pickleball, I think.”
Maverick’s job offer was the only thing I’d thought about since this morning.
The whole Hunter Valley thing wasn’t something I imagined.
There wasn’t much of a real office here yet, only a small staff.
But if they wanted a PR person here, then they definitely planned to build it up.
With me. ME! I’d be in a place where I knew my ideas were valid.
In a job that could only grow. With people who were nice. Quirky. Fun.
I’d dreamed of working in Denver, getting based there, but this little town?
With Mac and Andy and Drew? It would be perfect.
But that whole casual thing made the decision tough.
Should I move across town or back to Georgia?
Mav said HR would email me the job details and I could take some time to consider.
He knew all about moving to Hunter Valley and that the decision was bigger than taking the job alone.
I still had to sell my house I shared with Art.
I had furniture, clothing, belongings fifteen-hundred miles away.
I’d need a place to live, one that wasn’t over Mac’s garage.
A car that could tackle snow. Probably some winter driving lessons.
There was a lot.
But it all came down to one thing.
Mac.
Maverick didn’t know my accepting his offer revolved around Mac. No sane person would tell the CEO of a billion-dollar company that she was debating a position because of a man.
I’d texted Keely as soon as I got back to get some advice, because I sure as hell needed it. The conversation went like this:
I was offered the PR job. Here in Hunter Valley.
That’s amazing! Right?
It is amazing.
But?
But I can’t stay here if Mac doesn’t want me.
He wants you. How many times have you two fucked?
I’m a fling. He’s never once told me otherwise.
Men are idiots.
We could’ve gone on like that forever and I hated texting long conversations, so I called her.
“What am I going to do?” I asked when she picked up.
“Do? Take the job!”
God, it felt so good. So fulfilling. Wanted. Successful, too. Except–
“It’s not that simple.”
The one thing I wanted came with strings. Big strings. Which was ironic because I wasn’t supposed to have any strings.
Gah!
“Let me get this all straight. Your boss loved your work. He’s hiring you on full-time with James Corp, I might add, in Hunter Valley with your dream job. The guy you want to be with and who gives you amazing orgasms is there. He’s got a kid you love. What am I missing?”
I sighed, hoping the anxiousness and doubt would go away. “Yeah, I want Mac, but he doesn’t want me.”
“Are you sure about that because the other day you texted me with a lot of tongue and water droplet emojis. A few eggplants and–”
“I know, I know! But he doesn’t want anything permanent. He said so.”
“He said to you, I don’t want anything permanent?”
I closed my eyes and remembered back. “He said, “You’re going to find a man.” He even offered to kick the guy’s ass if he treated me badly.”
Yeah, that had been a great moment. Not. I was already overwhelmed and stunned by Lindy giving birth and then Mac had said that.
She was quiet for a moment. “Why would he say that?”
Why? “Because he’s a man not interested in a relationship. He doesn’t want me for more than sex. Oh, and a babysitter for his son.”
“Oh.”
I frowned, because recounting it made it sound even more obvious. “Yeah, oh.”
“Then tell him how you feel!”
I sighed. “Again, it’s not that simple.”
“Yes, it is. Let’s practice it together. ‘Mac, I’m in love with you and I want to be with you and Andy and let your eggplant and my cat make lots of water droplets.’”
I rolled my eyes and began to pace. “I can’t tell him I’m in love with him. One, because I’m not–”
“You are totally in love with him!”
I let my lids fall closed and I succumbed to the truth I’d been refusing to admit. That from the very first time I saw him at the airport, I was drawn to him. That what we felt, this chemistry, wasn’t normal. It was special and crazy and– “You’re right. I’m in love with him.”
It was ridiculous. I’d only known the guy for about two weeks.
In that time, we hadn’t done a hell of a lot of talking.
When we did talk, Mac was often obstinate and stubborn.
Said I drove him crazy. But I saw through all of that.
I thought I knew him. Knew his character, his honor.
The depth of his love for his family. That was what drew me to him as much as that sexy mustache and his ability to handle chaos with a cool head.
He was so unlike Art or any man I’d ever met. I never expected to fall for someone so completely different. So temperamental. So basic. Simple. Someone who cared more about the people around him than things as superficial as appearances. Who… was insanely perfect.
She screeched. “Finally! I was fixin’ to come up there and whoop your ass.”
“It doesn’t change a thing,” I countered, frustrated now that I admitted my feelings aloud. Saying them didn’t make anything easier. It actually hurt and I rubbed at my chest. I was stupid for falling for him when we’d clearly said it was just sex.
I swallowed hard, coming to terms with the truth. Of my mistake. I fell for another guy who doesn’t love me in return.
I was an idiot. Weak. I had an impulsive heart. One that was attracted to things I wasn’t supposed to have.
“He doesn’t love me, K,” I said. “He likes fucking me. He likes me babysitting for Andy. I’m replaceable. I’m temporary. No strings, remember?”
“Then you take the job of your dreams and steer clear of him.”
She made it sound so simple. Why couldn’t it be simple?
“Ha! This place is just like Calhan. Small. You think I can avoid Art and Pam?”
She laughed. “No.”
“Well, I can’t avoid the fire chief in Hunter Valley if I lived here. Everyone knows him. In the wintertime, I’d drive into a snowy ditch every day and he’d be the one to rescue me.”
“Fine. Then ask him if he wants you to stay. Then you’ll know.”
Keely was right. I needed to know how he felt about me. Because a job was a job. Love was something else entirely and I couldn’t walk away from the chance of it. Not if Mac felt the way I did.
“Ask him, G,” she pushed. “You have to. You spent years with Art not knowing he didn’t feel for you what you thought. He’s not Art and not every guy will let you down.”
I bit my lip, worried. “What if he doesn’t want me, just like Art?”
“Hon, then you’ll come home knowing you took that dick for a ride and had some fun. That dick got you over Art once and for all and you’ll be ready for the right guy when he comes along.”
That had been the end of my call with Keely and when my nerves kicked in.
Mac was here, watching me.
Are you leaving? he’d asked.
Now was the time. The moment. My plane ticket back to Georgia was for the morning. I was so nervous my palms were sweating. I wiped them on my pants. Mac was everything I wanted. Moody, sure. But selfless and sexy. Bossy and an amazing father. An incredible lover.
I swallowed hard, licked my lips. God, I wanted to go to him, wrap my arms around him and hope he held me right back. I wanted him to kiss the top of my head, call me his good girl and then fuck me like I was very, very bad.
But more sex wasn’t going to change anything except my orgasm count. I had to ask. I had to know if I belonged, and if it was here. With him. Do it. Do it. DO. IT!
“Do you… do you want me to stay?” I asked. Do you love me? Do you want to be with me? Do you want me?
There. I did it. My heart was pounding louder than Andy flying down the stairs. I smiled. Waited. Waited. Waited, just like when the emcee opened the envelope to announce the winner of a pageant.