Chapter 15 #2
Instead of dry humping each other every night, we’ve spent a few hours each evening putting the finishing touches on Remy’s room.
The bear decals finally arrived in the mail, so the entire theme is complete.
The bears have pink bows on their heads too, which totally brings the color of the walls out.
Henley has finished putting all of the furniture together, and I’ve been organizing clothes by size, preparing for the upcoming winter season, and organizing toys and other items in her closet.
Her room is almost complete and the admiration I feel for Henley for finally getting it done has been hard to contain.
Luckily, I’ve had a mental distraction of whether or not I’m going to agree to perform at Laney’s family’s winery in a few weeks, even though my heart is leaning toward saying yes.
In fact, as I was writing my song today, I realized just how much I’ve missed that aspect, and it would be the perfect opportunity to debut some new lyrics.
“She’s been a little cranky today. I think that tooth on the bottom gums is really affecting her.”
Henley frowns at his daughter. “Well, that’s just unacceptable, huh, baby bear?” His eyes find mine. “Did you give her anything?”
“A little bit of Tylenol earlier, which seemed to help because about twenty minutes later she passed out for two hours.”
“Well, at least she got a nap.”
“I’m convinced that’s the only reason why she’s in a decent mood right now.”
Henley carries her over to the living room, setting her down on the floor in her Bumbo chair that allows her to sit up on her own. He lowers himself to the ground and then reads a book to her, making my heart melt even more for this man.
After we eat, clean up the kitchen, bathe Remy, and shower ourselves, Henley insists on putting Remy to bed on his own. We moved her crib into her room tonight, so he’s nervous about not having her sleeping with him, even though he hasn’t outwardly admitted it. But I think it’s adorable.
I’m sitting on the couch, flipping through Netflix, trying to find a movie for us to watch when my phone vibrates next to me.
My mom’s name flashes on the screen and I momentarily debate not answering it.
I haven’t spoken on the phone with her since I moved to Blossom Peak.
In fact, the last time we texted a few weeks ago, she asked me how L.A. was, and I told her things were great.
Obviously, I lied.
“Hello?” I answer, trying to keep my voice low.
“Elodie? Why are you whispering?”
“Um, I—” Struggling to come up with an excuse, I sigh and decide it’s time to tell the truth. “I don’t want to wake up my boss’s kid.”
Her silence is eerie. “I’m sorry, did you just say your boss’s kid?”
“Yeah…”
“Elodie Anne Olsen, you’d better fill me in on what you mean by that right now.”
Sighing, I lean back further into the couch cushions. “I’m not in L.A., Mom. I’m in Blossom Peak. I’m nannying for this guy and…”
“Does this mean you’re done trying to make it as a singer?
” The tone of her voice is more optimistic than concerned.
A supportive parent would wonder why I’m giving up—even though that’s not what I’m doing—but still.
Sometimes I wish my parents would just support me because that’s what they’re supposed to do, regardless of whether they understand what I want for my life or not.
“No, I’m just taking a break.”
It’s her turn to sigh. “Elodie, let’s call this what it is—you are finally realizing that music is not a stable career and…”
“I didn’t realize that. My lease was up on the house I was renting, and I wanted a break.”
“So why not come home?”
“Jeez, Mom. Why do you think? So you can stand right in front of me and look me in the eyes while you tell me that my dreams are stupid?”
Henley walks down the hall, his brows drawn together as he takes in only my side of this conversation.
“Does this mean you’ll be home for Thanksgiving and Christmas?” my mom asks, ignoring what I just said.
“I—I don’t know yet.” Henley takes a seat on the couch next to me. “Look, this has been a great talk, but I’ve got to go.”
“Elodie, I just want you to have a secure future, honey. You could open a daycare like I did. The money is nice and you love kids. You said you’re a nanny now? I could totally see you being happy doing that.”
The truth is, I am happy taking care of Remy, but that’s the last thing I want to say to her right now.
I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. “I know, Mom. I just—I haven’t made any concrete decisions yet, okay? And I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner, but…”
“I understand, honey, even though I don’t.” Wow, way to make sense, Mom. “But Blossom Peak, huh?”
“Yeah, our trips here as a kid were always my favorite, so I was hoping that being back here would help me get clarity.”
“Well, I hope you find what you’re looking for there, Elodie. But you know that home is just a short drive from there if you need to regroup.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
“Let me know about the holidays, okay?”
“I will.” When I end the call, I look up to find Henley watching me. “My mom…”
“I gathered that.” The crease in his brow is still there. “What did she say?”
“Well, since I hadn’t told her I’ve been in Blossom Peak for the past two months…”
“Your mom didn’t know you were here?”
“No, Henley. What part of my parents aren’t supportive of my music career did you not understand?”
He holds a hand up. “Hey, I’m just trying to understand what’s going on…”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “I’m sorry. You don’t deserve me snapping at you, I just—” A heavy sigh escapes me. “Every time I talk to her, there’s always this voice in the back of my mind that wonders if she and my dad are right—that I need to just throw in the towel and get a regular job.”
He pulls me into his arms and situates me so I’m straddling him, a position that I haven’t been in since the night I dry humped him. And all this position is doing is making me think about that night, not the conversation with my mom.
“I want to say that I understand, but I don’t. I didn’t have parents that cared at all, El. In fact, at one point, I stopped caring too.”
Remembering the lack of concern he got from his parents makes me feel guilty for being irritated by mine. “Do—do you know what happened to them?”
He shakes his head. “No. Dilynne and I made a promise to each other to never go looking for the answer.”
“I don’t know if I could do that, if I could live my life without knowing if they were dead or alive.”
He stares up at me, pushing my hair behind my ear.
“That’s because you have parents who love you, who were there every day while you were growing up.
When you have to raise yourself, you begin to realize there are other things that matter more.
Dilynne was the only person I was concerned about.
In fact, I still am from time to time because the girl does like to push boundaries. ”
I laugh. “I can only imagine.”
“But that’s not to say that you should feel any sort of obligation to them for how you live your life just because they were there. If Nick and Carol had told me not to buy the ski lodge, I wouldn’t have listened to them.”
“Really? I thought…”
“Did they take in me and my sister when we needed them? Yes. But I don’t owe them anything for that.
” His statement has me confused, because he almost sounds like there’s a double meaning to his words.
“The only opinion that matters is mine, and therefore, yours. You’re the one that has to look yourself in the mirror every day and like the person looking back at you. ”
“Do you like the person you see in the mirror, Henley?” For a second, I wonder if the question crossed a line, but he surprises me with his answer.
“No,” he says, his eyes locked on mine before they move across my face and down my neck.
“The man I see in the mirror has a lot of growing up to do. He’s got to own the mess he’s made with his emotions, take responsibility for the shit he’s been running from.
” His grip tightens on my waist, pulling me flush against him, and I feel him growing hard beneath me.
“He’s also a man that wants to defile his nanny, even though he promised to be on his best behavior. ”
“I think his nanny would very much like to be defiled.”
He licks a trail up my neck, nibbling at my earlobe and sending tremors through me. “The first time I fuck you, I want to know that you’re ready for it.”
“I promise, I’m ready,” I pant, grateful for the change in topic because the ache between my legs has been intensifying for days and getting harder to ignore. “Please, Henley…”
He hums as he closes his eyes. “Fuck, don’t start begging, sweetheart. I’m not going to be able to control myself.”
I grind my pussy against his cock. “Is that what you’ve been doing since you kissed me? Controlling yourself?”
“You have no idea how much,” he grates out.
Leaning back with his hands still on my hips, I say words I’ve wanted to since the night of our admissions. “Well, how about you show me what it looks like when you lose control?”
The clench in his jaw is so sexy that I have to force myself not to strip him down myself and ride him until we’re both screaming. My sex drive has been non-existent for months, but Henley has made me want to be vulnerable again, to seek out pleasure with someone who makes me feel comfortable.
And even though I feel like we’ve been walking on eggshells around each other for weeks, I now know it’s because Henley’s been fighting this just as hard as I have.
But I don’t care about the consequences anymore.
I see the moment his decision flashes through his eyes. Then he’s lifting me in his arms and setting me on my feet before loosening the drawstring of my sweats. “This is about you, not me. Got it?”