Chapter 9
Pernelle
A week later
I don’t know why I lied to Crew about being on pelvic rest, because I was struggling thinking about his sexy ass and the way he fucked me when we made this baby.
I guess my reasoning was that I didn’t want Crew coming around or being in my daughter’s life just because he wanted to have a sexual relationship with me.
I wanted him to be here because he wanted to be a dad, not because my cooch is good.
I was sitting on the bench outside, uncomfortable in this tight-ass yellow dress that Emoney’s sister Brenda was adamant I wear to this baby shower.
The Bronx winter air had that cold bite to it, slipping through the dress like it was personal.
I am just ready for this shit to be over with so that I can go back home and be comfortable in my bed.
Every five seconds, I’m wincing in pain and rubbing my stomach because this little girl was so damn feisty, and she kicked like crazy.
Crew had given me orders not to have this shower, but he didn’t understand the predicament I was in.
Plus, what is the shower going to hurt? It’s gifts, free food, and potential babysitters if I ever need them.
At the end of the day, they were prepared to step up in more ways than I felt like Crew would.
He talks a good game, but actions always speak louder than words and so far, all he has given me is words. That and a DNA test.
Emoney’s mama, Ms. Erika, picked me up in her Nissan Altima, dressed in a baby shower shirt that said “Glamma” across the front. The car smelled of meatballs, her famous chicken wings Emoney always requested, and a pan of ribs, with a strict “one each” rule in place before the event even started.
We rolled all the way to MJ Catering Hall in the Bronx, and from the outside, I could already tell that Emoney’s family went all out.
Yellow balloons tangled around the railing, SpongeBob and Patrick cutouts posted at the door like security, and island music floating out every time someone opened the door.
Once I got out and wobbled up to the door, I was met with hugs, cameras flashing, and cheering from dozens of people who had already made it there before me. My mom and Princeton were among the crowd, and Princeton looked like he wanted to be anywhere else but here.
“Damn, Chicken head, glad you finally made it. They been holding on to the tuna salad sandwiches like them bitches just for you. A nigga fucking hungry.”
My mama slapped him on the back of his head.
“Shut up, boy. You can wait.” She turned her attention to me.
“Hey P. You look beautiful.”
“Thanks, mama. It’s so nice in here. They went all out.”
“Yes, they did. They are ready!” My mama made a corny SpongeBob reference that humored her more than me.
I glanced around the room, and there were SpongeBob cutouts on every table, charger plates with baby-bottle napkins next to them, and balloon garlands twisted up in yellow, blue, and pink to match the theme.
Front and center was a large backdrop that read “Nine Months Later” in gold lettering.
I wouldn’t have picked this theme myself, but it was cute, and they wanted it simply because SpongeBob was one of Emoney’s favorite shows.
The whole room smelled like barbecue sauce, perfume, and baby powder, and the music bumped low under the chatter which was now a mix of old-school jams and R&B slow cuts.
For the first time, I actually felt bad about what I was doing. They were so excited about this baby, but I guess at the same time, I needed to remind myself that I’m healing them with this baby, too. Without Emoney here they still feel they have a part of her coming back.
There was a special seat waiting for me at the front of the shower in a big white king-sized chair with gold trim, right under the balloon arch.
Once I sat down, the shower seemed to fill up quickly, and I took so many pictures, my cheeks started to hurt.
I, however, had to cut the pics short because I was starving, and neither me nor baby girl liked to wait to eat.
Of course, I didn’t have to move to get my own plate. They brought me everything I wanted, and within fifteen minutes my dress had stains from wings, mac and cheese, and the three ribs that Ms. Erika swore she wasn’t letting anybody get seconds of, but I was the exception for that.
I got so full that I was ready to go immediately after I finished, but I couldn’t go anywhere without opening the presents first. There was a table stacked so high with gifts that I knew this was going to take an hour but again I didn't have to move and simply sit there admiring everything.
My mama and Ms. Erika were standing next to me, one handing me the gifts and the other holding a trash bag to throw the gift wrap and bags away.
I was halfway through opening the slew of gifts stacked in front of me before all of the baby stuff started to make me tear up. The tiny onesies were so fuckin cute, and the baby bottles and bows had me tore up.
When I looked up to grab the gift from Emoney’s cousin Stacey, I caught a glimpse of the entrance and had to double-take when I saw Crew of all people, standing there, iced out in a Burberry shirt and tan jeans to match. Why the hell is this nigga here in the national baby daddy baby shower outfit?
“Oh, he must be lost.”
My mama spoke up as every eye in the room watched Crew approach me at the front of the baby shower.
I had to swallow the lump in my throat because I was terrified of what his reaction was about to be.
He had a cold, hard mug on his face until he was a few inches away from me and bent down over the chair and into my ear.
"Did you get the email from the clinic?"
"No, I, I, didn't. Crew, what are you doing here?"
"The DNA results said 100% probability. So, I am here because this is my baby shower, too. Can I get a plate of chicken wings or some shit since we know that’s my baby?
" I was so stuck on the fact that Crew was in here that it took a while to realize he said that the results had come back.
I hadn't been stalking my inbox to find out, because I knew all along who the father was.
But how the hell did he know I was here?
Ms. Erika stepped in between us.
"Excuse me, baby, but we are opening up gifts, and this is a baby shower. There was also a diaper raffle at the door for entry, and I don't see any diapers in your hand."
"With all due respect, ma'am, my daughter doesn't need any diapers, or cheap ass clothes and bottles from anybody in here."
The crowd of people started to react because Crew was now speaking loud enough for everyone to hear. No one however got crazy because everyone in here probably knew who he was and his cutthroat reputation.
"What is going on, Pernelle? What is he talking about?" I was looking up at Ms. Erika, so blown away by all this that my mouth was moving, but no words were coming out. Suddenly, the silence was broken by Princeton bursting out laughing before my mama gave him the look of death.
"P, get up and let's go to Target or somewhere to get the shit my daughter needs."
"Crew, don’t do this right now. Are you serious?"
"I am dead ass. I told you not to come here anyway. Now quit playing with these people and bring your ass on."
He put his hand out in front of me.
"Pernelle, are you going to tell us what's going on! Is this man the father of that baby? After all the money I spent on this shower?" Emoney’s mama had that scowl on her face that I often saw in the past before we became close.
"Ms. Erika, I am sorry. I didn't know how to tell you. This was a mistake."
I looked over to Crew, who was digging in his pockets, then pulled out a wad of money and handed it to Ms. Erika.
"Here’s about $5,000, even though I am sure you ain't spent that much. Please forgive my baby mama for being dumb and putting you through this shit. Now come on, P, my car is still running.
Crew walked off and left me sitting in the chair before I struggled up out of the seat and followed behind him.
Everyone in the room was saying slick shit about me, and walking out of here was the hardest walk of shame I’ve ever taken.
When we got to the door where Emoney's sister Brenda was sitting collecting tickets, she stood there all bull in the face.
"Bitch you got some fucking nerve. I should beat your ass!" Her arm flew up, and just before she could put her hands on me, Crew stopped her arm in the air.
"Don't die today. Pull the winner of this mutha fuckin diaper raffle, get you a plate or sum, but find you something safe to do." And she swallowed all her words while looking up into Crew's eyes.
"Matter of fact, let me get a plate, it smells good as hell in this mutha fucka."
Crew left me at the door, and I walked out ahead of him going to the car. My mama was right out the door on my heels, calling my name.
"Pernelle! What the hell is going on?"
"Mama, I tried telling you that chicken head had a baby daddy." Princeton had to add his two cents in.
"Oh, shut up, Princeton. Is this for real, Pernelle?"
"Yes, Mama, it’s true. I'm pregnant by Crew and not IVF."
She exhaled deeply and shook her head.
"I am so disappointed in you, Pernelle. Not only did you just embarrass yourself, but you embarrassed me too!"
She walked off, and Princeton followed behind her, still laughing like this shit was a fuckin TV show and not my life.
Explaining to my mama why I did what I did would be a long story we will have later.
She’s embarrassed, and she has every right to be because I am too.
I never expected to be called out like this in front of Emoney's whole family.
I could just kill Crew. It was just so hard to really want to do it when he looks so fucking good in that Burberry shirt today.
"It's unlocked." Crew called out coming out of the building with a plate stacked up with at least five ribs.
"You know Pretty P. If you faked this baby shower to get some of these ribs, I don't blame you." He and I climbed into his car.
"Crew, I told you why I didn’t want to tell them. You didn't have to come in here and do that.”
“And I told you not to have a baby shower with those people if you knew this was my daughter, but you did. Shit, my daughter being inside your stomach is the only reason I did not snatch you out of there by your fuckin hair.”
He took a bite from a wing on his plate as he navigated the wheels with his knees.
All I could do at this point was shake my fuckin head because I was outdone by this entire day. I guess the embarrassment I felt was God’s way of showing me that I was wrong, and I never should have lied to those people about this baby. I just pray it doesn't come back to bite me in the ass.