32. Bottom Of My Heart
CHAPTER 32
bottom of my heart
BELLE
I called Anna, needing moral support, maybe a little sympathy.
Anna answered after one ring. "What's up?"
I groaned. "It's complicated."
She laughed. "Complicated? Is that code for I've somehow made a huge mess of my life but want to pretend it's sophisticated?"
"More or less." I flopped back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. "Mick wants me to leave. He thinks he's doing me a favor. The whole noble, my life is too simple for you; you're destined for greatness nonsense."
"Oh, please." I could practically hear her rolling her eyes. "What does he think you are, a prized racehorse? Run free, Belle, go win gold medals, and change the world. I'll be here, toiling away in obscurity. Give me a break."
"Right?!" I bolted upright, feeling vindicated. "He basically thinks I have no work-life balance and that I'm going to, I don't know, burn out like he did."
There was a pause, and then Anna snorted. "Well… "
I narrowed my eyes, even though she couldn't see me. "Well, what?"
"He's not wrong."
"Oh, come on, Anna! Whose side are you on?"
"Belle, honey, I'm on your side," she said in the tone she used when I was being particularly dense. "But you have to admit, you are a terrible workaholic. Completely obsessed. You don't exactly have what I'd call a balanced lifestyle."
I groaned. "I'm not obsessed. I just… care. And I like working. What does balance even mean? It sounds like one of those terms people throw around when they're too lazy to have a real passion."
"Uh-huh," Anna said dryly. "You're right; balance is totally a scam. That's why people invented it. To trick productive people like you into wasting time doing silly things, like, I don't know, being happy."
I flopped back down again, pressing my hand to my forehead. "You're not helping, Anna."
"Look, I know you're capable of amazing things. You've got a drive that would intimidate most people. But you also have this guy who loves you and wants to be with you—and you're about to throw that away because…you don't know how to take a nap?"
I let out a huff. "I know how to take a nap."
"Really?" she said, her voice skeptical. "When's the last time you took one?"
There was a silence. "That's not the point."
"You're on a beach with a hammock, and you haven't taken a nap. Belle, you're the only person I know who has to schedule relaxation into her calendar. And then, if something else comes up, you cancel it." She paused, then asked in a suspiciously innocent tone, "Do you remember that one time you tried to do self-care Sunday, and it lasted about ten minutes before you ended up reorganizing your files?"
I groaned, burying my face in a pillow. "That was one time."
Anna laughed. "Right. But you've done it in different forms about fifty times. Mick's not an idiot, Belle. He's just observant. And maybe he has a point."
I lifted my head, glaring at the wall. "So you're saying I should just give up on my dreams and…what? Sit around with him all day, sipping pina coladas and chasing lizards off the porch?"
Anna giggled. "I'm not saying give up your dreams. But maybe let's not go full lizard-chaser, either. There's a middle ground here. Balance isn't about abandoning what you love; it's about making room for a life. And you're terrible at that."
"Wow. Thanks, Anna. Just what I needed to hear."
"Belle, I'm your sister, not your fucking cheerleader. Let me tell you this: I know you'll regret it if you let Mick slip through your fingers if you don't wake the hell up, and as a bonus, you'll get an ulcer and high blood pressure. You have a guy who actually wants to be in your life and who thinks you're amazing. How many of those do you think you're going to find?"
"Probably just the one," I muttered, kicking at the bedspread. "But he's so… infuriating sometimes. He doesn't get it. He thinks working hard is the enemy, and I just…I don't think I can do what he wants. I don't know how to be that kind of person."
"That's because you've never tried, Belle," she said, with an edge of patience that only an older sister could pull off. "Look, maybe he doesn't get it, and maybe you don't get him. But that doesn't mean you can't find a way to meet in the middle. He doesn't want you to give up your work. He just wants to know your life with him is more important to you than your job. "
"It is," I whispered, a little surprised by how much I meant it. "But he doesn't believe that, he never will."
"Then prove it to him," Anna suggested like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "For once in your life, put down the laptop and show him he's worth it. Take a damn afternoon off without having a meltdown. Or better yet, take a weekend off. Go fishing. Or whatever it is that people do in that tropical paradise of his."
I laughed. "I caught a yellowtail last time."
"Sounds fabulous," she said triumphantly. "Go do something completely pointless and unproductive and…I don't know…relaxing. Show him you can."
I sat up, chewing my lip. "So what, you think I should just…wander around in the sand all day, waiting for my inner Zen to appear?"
"If that's what it takes, yes! Or maybe…don't take life so seriously all the time. Give him something. Show him you're willing to learn a little balance, even if you have to grit your teeth through it." She laughed. "It might be good for you. You're not going to die of underachievement if you spend a day or two without a deadline."
"Underachievement," I muttered, rolling my eyes. "Is that even a word?"
"It is now. Look, Belle, you've spent your whole life impressing everyone. You've got more awards than I can count. But that's not what Mick cares about. He cares about you. So maybe, instead of trying to impress him with how hard you work, try impressing him with how much you're willing to not work. See what happens."
I was silent for a moment, turning it over. The idea sounded ridiculous and impractical. And yet…she had a point. I couldn't continue like this. It wasn't sustainable.
"You really think he'd stick around if I…tried the balance thing? "
"I think he'd stick around if you asked him to wear a tutu," Anna said. "Look, you've done the workaholic thing. You know what that looks like. Why not try the other side? You might actually like it."
I let out a long, exaggerated sigh. "Fine. Whatever ."
"That's the spirit!" she cheered sarcastically. "And hey, worst-case scenario, you get a tan and some fun memories. Best case, you don't lose the guy who might actually be perfect for you."
After ending my conversation with my sister, I went looking for Mick. I found him on the beach by the Coral Cove, skipping stones with Franco, while Cato watched with an amused smirk, lounging on a big piece of driftwood with a coconut drink in hand. Toothless Nick, half-asleep in his usual spot at the outdoor bar, perked up as I walked over.
I was supposed to leave the island in a day, and I didn't know what to do to convince Mick that we weren't ending just because I was going to Cambridge.
"There she is!" Franco called, tossing a flat stone into the waves. "You off saving the world tomorrow, Belle?"
"Well…." I grinned, plopping down beside Mick in the sand. "I might be saving a few lives soon." I held up my phone, the screen glowing with the email I'd waited months for. "It's happening, Mick—the second batch of results just came in, and we're seeing positive effects for Sanfilippo Syndrome in the kids." I could barely contain my excitement. "This is real progress. I have to get back to Cambridge to keep things moving!"
The whole crew broke into cheers and applause, with Nick even spilling some of his drink as he held it up in a toast.
"See, Mick?" Cato rolled his eyes. "You didn't ruin her career by dragging her to paradise."
I laughed, nudging Mick's shoulder, who looked most proud .
"Which brings me to… another idea," I said, looking at Mick meaningfully. "You, me, Reef Harbor—and Cambridge. Let's make it work. You've got enough money to charter a plane anytime you want, Dr. Augustus, and I need to learn to escape the lab and find my peace with you."
I could work in Reef Harbor but at a slower pace, for maybe thirty hours a week instead of seventy. I could take weekends off. I could love Mick.
He blinked at me, and the laughter around us quieted as everyone leaned in, clearly invested in whatever crazy scheme was about to come out of my mouth.
"So," I continued, grinning up at him, "come with me tomorrow and help me. We split our time. Reef Harbor and Cambridge. Your money, my brain, plus your brain—we're unstoppable. Besides," I added, "you'll always have a tan. I'll make sure of it."
Mick looked at me, a slow grin spreading across his face. "So, you want me to follow you back to Cambridge, only to fly us both back here whenever we need a break?"
"That's the plan," I said, holding my breath and waiting for his answer. He glanced at Franco, who was giving him an enthusiastic thumbs-up. RiRi, who'd come out to investigate the cheering, put an arm around Cato, a big smile on their faces. Even Toothless Nick looked happy.
"And you promise to take breaks?" Mick mused.
"You'll never have to drug me again," I vowed.
"You know what?" Mick laughed. "I think that's the most genius plan you've ever come up with."
"About time, you both," Franco growled, "It's been fucking impossible to see the two of you fumble this shit."
Before I could reply, we heard Officer Ray Jenkins's voice, drawling in his usual unimpressed tone as he strolled by, hands in his pockets. "I hear I'll be seeing less of you, Belle. Leaving Mick here to be the troublemaker alone? "
"Not a chance," Mick shot back, laughing. "She's dragging me right along with her."
"Can you keep him there?" Ray wanted to know.
"Nah, we're going to be coming back all the time," I told him. He made a face.
Everyone cheered again, and as I looked around at the absurd, wonderful mess that was my Reef Harbor family, I knew I wouldn't be giving any of it up—not Reef Harbor, not my work, and especially not Mick.
Later that night, Mick and I took a walk along the beach, just the two of us under a sky blazing with stars. The water lapped quietly at our feet, and for the first time in months, I felt like I could breathe. The ocean air was warm, and with Mick beside me, the reality of our new plan started to sink in.
"You know," I kicked at the sand, "for a guy who left it all behind, you're not so bad at managing a double life."
He chuckled, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "All part of my charm. So, you're really okay with this? Going between Reef Harbor and Cambridge?"
I looked up at him, smiling. "More than okay." I hesitated, my voice softer. "Mick, I…I love you."
He stopped, staring down at me, and in that moment, everything else seemed to fall away. "Belle," he murmured, pulling me close. "I've been in love with you since you showed up at Coral Cove looking for me."
Our kiss was perfect, right there under the stars—and that's exactly when I felt something sharp and searing wrap around my ankle.
"Ah!" I yelped, pulling back, hopping up and down. "Something just stung me!"
Mick's face went from love-struck to amused. "Did you step on a jellyfish?"
I hobbled over to a rock, clutching my ankle. "I don't know, but it's burning, Mick! Do something! "
His grin turned devious. "Well, you know, legend has it you need…a certain remedy for jellyfish stings. A bit…unorthodox."
I glared at him, catching onto exactly what he meant. "No way. You're not peeing on me. This relationship will be over before it starts."
"Come on, Belle," he teased. "A little island wisdom never hurt anyone."
I shot him a warning look, and even through the pain, I couldn't help but chuckle. "There has to be another way."
He took my hand, kneeling to examine the sting with exaggerated seriousness. "You know, I'm glad we're both scientists. I happen to have a bottle of vinegar in my hut that should do the trick."
Mick carried me to his…our hut. He set me down on the steps of his porch and jogged in. He returned with a bottle of vinegar and a towel. He gently dabbed on the sting, his touch soft.
"That's better," I whispered, looking at him as the pain started to subside.
He grinned, pulling me close and wrapping me in his arms. "Good. Because I plan on keeping you around for a long time, Dr. Volnay. Stings and all."
As we sat together, stars twinkling above and the ocean stretching out beside us, it hit me—I was exactly where I wanted to be, right here, with Mick, building a life that I knew was going to be amazing.