Chapter 9 Daisy
NINE
DAISY
A surge of fury blistered through the room. I almost wanted to shrink away from the ferocity that was Cash Cunningham, except I knew the fury he felt wasn’t at me but rather for me.
For my kids.
Those hazel eyes flashed and flared with a severity greater than anything I’d ever witnessed.
The power of it weakened my knees, and I dipped my face as if I could hide from it. From the things he made me feel and the old wants he caused to resurface.
Embarrassed that I was so pathetic that I was still imagining them.
Cash tightened his hold on my chin.
“Nothing is going to happen to you or those kids. I promise you that.” I felt each of those words as if they were carved in stone.
But he didn’t know Ethan. He didn’t know what he was capable of.
I guess I really didn’t, either. Not until it became clear someone was after me. Clear that my ex-husband’s intention was taking my life, or at least scoring a fear so horrible inside me that I would keep my mouth shut, but I wasn’t about to take that chance.
Not with my children.
“I need you to do this for me,” I whispered into the tension that bound us.
Cash’s eyes dimmed. Dimmed in shame and sorrow. “If you knew me, you would never ask that of me, Daisy.”
“I know you better than anyone.”
Pain lanced through his severe features. “Not anymore.”
Heartbreaker.
I’d never felt it as acute as right then.
I guess he had broken all of us.
I couldn’t help but bring up the past. To try to reach him in the pain he so clearly wore. “I’m so sorry, Cash. I’m so sorry about what happened to your family.”
It was such a horrible accident. I still couldn’t fathom it.
His teeth ground. “Don’t. Please don’t.”
“I—”
A big hand came to my cheek, cutting me off, so soft against the rage I could feel simmering beneath his skin.
He angled in close.
His proximity was overwhelming. The man smelled like the woods and the faintest vestiges of sweat. Unfortunately for me, there wasn’t a single thing unappealing about it.
“My Little Wallflower…”
My throat thickened.
I couldn’t believe he called me that. I hadn’t heard it in so long.
He caressed the apple of my cheek. “There’s one thing you can be certain of. You are safe here with me. You don’t have to be afraid.”
He let his hand slide down the side of my face before he curled his hand around my left wrist and lifted it. I didn’t realize he’d noticed the tattoo I had inscribed on the inside of it until he ran the callused pad of his thumb over it.
In Silence We Must Endure.
“You were never meant to be left in the silence. You were supposed to bloom. Thrive. And I’m going to make sure that you do.”
“How was I supposed to thrive without you?” I shouldn’t let it escape, but I couldn’t help it. Not when I felt the most vulnerable I had in years. The old wounds raw and aching. The loss right there. Now whole and real and touching me.
“And I am afraid, Cash, and I know what I’m asking is—”
He suddenly whipped away, clearly panicked and uncertain.
With his back to me, he roughed a hand down his face.
“I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to do here, Daisy.
I’m the last fuckin’ person on Earth you’d want caring for your kids.
What you’re asking of me is all wrong. But I promise you, I’m going to take care of this.
End the problem. Then you’ll be free, the way you deserve to be. ”
“Cash, I—”
He turned back around.
Hostility vibrated him to the bone. Barely contained fury. His gravelly voice forever cut low.
“I have to go out tonight.”
I swore that the tattoo on the back of his left hand subconsciously flexed. The stacked Ss with the eye and dagger hardening into a fist. The flames from the torch lapped up his wrist as if at any moment his entire being would be consumed.
What was he in?
I could almost see them—the secrets that whirled around his being.
A storm of anarchy.
The demand was already grinding off his tongue as he pulled out his phone. “What’s your number?”
My mind couldn’t keep up with the sudden shift, and I fumbled over the number as if he’d plucked it right out of me.
He tapped it out before he tucked his phone into his back pocket. “I have a friend on the way to keep an extra eye. No one is getting in here. No one is going to touch you. You can rest and get some sleep.”
I gaped as he strode for the front door.
He was like a falling star that blinked out too soon. So bright and blinding in my life before he faded away.
And here I was the fool who wanted to stand in the remnants of his glow.
“Don’t open the door for anyone,” he grunted before he stepped out into the night and pulled the door shut behind him. A panel on the wall beeped as a security system was engaged before what sounded like three locks were latched into place.
Ensuring that we were secure.
It did give me a fragment of comfort, but still, that hole inside me expanded as he left.
In the distance, I could hear a motorcycle approaching. The powerful engine grew louder and louder with each second that passed before I saw the glow of a headlight come up the lane.
I eased up to the window and peeked out the side of the drape, spying Cash talking in hushed tones to a brown-haired man who swung off a bike. Tattooed and hard and every bit as intimidating as Cash.
The man nodded and shook his head before Cash turned and strode for a huge, detached garage about a hundred feet to the right of the house. A big rolling door opened, and a blaze of white light spilled out.
Cash went straight for a motorcycle that was parked inside.
He swung his leg over the metal.
So powerful as he gripped the handlebars and kicked over the engine.
He was so different than the man I used to know. Covered in ink and written in shadows.
Dangerous in a way that was so foreign.
He pulled out of the garage and took off down the worn path that led through the forest in the direction of the main road. The single red taillight disappeared almost immediately, and the man who’d come lit a cigarette as he leaned against the seat of his bike.
Something that almost appeared to be a smirk hitched on his face when he noticed me peering out at him.
Or maybe he knew I’d been there all along.
Crap.
Embarrassed, I dropped the curtain, chewed at a hangnail on my thumb, and wondered if I made a mistake coming here.
Cash’s life was obviously something that I didn’t understand. Something that oozed with the same kind of warnings that he’d given me.
The bare threat of what he was capable of when he made the promise that he would take care of Ethan.
I was almost terrified to contemplate the way he might take care of him.
My spirit thrashed.
No.
This had to be the right choice. It had to be because it was the only one I could make.
Blowing out a sigh, I hurried to Cash’s bedroom where I left my phone charging on the nightstand. I thumbed into it and found a waiting text from an unknown number.
Unknown
Mean it, Daisy. You are safe with me. Rest.
Affection stretched my chest tight, but I sucked the foolish notions down, then saved his number under the nickname I gave him long ago.
Heartbreaker.
I needed to freaking remember it.
I stilled, my heart swelling when I started to type out a message to the one other person in this world that I had. I was so grateful that she’d come back into my life. That we were reconciling what had been lost.
Me
Are you awake?
I eased over and sat on the side of the bed, my heart battering at my ribs as I waited for her to reply.
God, I could still smell him. Could still feel him. Cash’s presence so thick in the house that he was the only thing that I could breathe. In his bedroom, it was ten times worse. His scent embedded in the sheets.
How the heck was I supposed to get any of that rest he was speaking of?
My sister responded almost immediately.
Hadley
Oh my gosh, thank God you texted. I was getting really worried about you.
Me
I know, I’m sorry.
From across the country, I could feel her concern. We decided it would be best if I contacted her as little as possible. Ethan didn’t know where she was living. Hell, he didn’t even know that she’d contacted me. That I finally knew she was safe and alive.
Still, we weren’t willing to take the chance that he would find out and track her down to get to me.
Hadley
What’s going on? Are you safe?
Gulping, I glanced at the closed door before I let my fingers fly across the screen.
Me
I found him.
Three bubbles immediately popped up.
Hadley
Are you serious? I thought it was a long shot. No chance that it was actually him.
Me
He’s living on a ton of property in the middle of nowhere outside of that small town we found.
Hadley
He’s not married or with someone?
It’d been one of the risks I was taking. That I’d get here, and he would have long moved on. I wanted that for him—joy—but I also knew it would have devastated me.
Me
No. He’s single. And I think kind of a recluse. Quiet and reserved. Though I think he maybe has people he knows here.
I knew what he’d been about to say earlier. There were people here he considered family. That was right before shame took him over. As if he thought he was committing a sin for loving. A crime for finding something in the ashes.
Hadley
Wow. I can’t believe it.
Me
He’s letting us stay with him.
Hadley
Did you think he wouldn’t? He was always obsessed with you.
Me
I would hardly call him obsessed.
Hadley
Pssh. The boy was smitten.
I’d thought so. For one moment in time. Before that moment was ripped away.
Me
He’s different now. Harder.
Hadley
Are you having second thoughts?
Me
No. But I’m not sure he’ll agree.
Hadley
You already asked him?
Me
Yeah. He was…
I hesitated before I sent another text.
Me
Terrified by the idea, I think. But he promised he would protect us.
It took a while for her to respond.
Hadley
But that’s not enough for you?
Contemplating, I rolled my bottom lip between my teeth.
Me
I just need certainty, Hadley. I need to know, no matter what, my children will be taken care of.
I could feel her pain from across the miles. Her regret and her love.
Hadley
You know I would care for them if I could. I’m so sorry that I can’t do more.
Me
Don’t you dare apologize. I’m just thankful to have you back.
I’d thought she was gone. Forever. Succumbing to the grief of losing our mother all those years ago. Blaming herself for what had happened.
I’d felt so alone without her for all these years. Abandoned by everyone that I loved.
But she had finally gotten to a place where she was emotionally and mentally well enough to make contact, a miracle in itself, though there was no question she was still struggling.
In it, though? She was the one who gave me the ultimate courage to find Cash when I drove around aimlessly after I fled from West Virginia.
She had helped me sift through the few clues we could find on his whereabouts.
The old memory of what he’d once told me of how I could always find him bringing up a result I really hadn’t expected.
So I’d taken this long shot and turned my car in the direction of this small town in Northern California.
Moonlit Ridge.
Me
Who knows where we would be right now if it wasn’t for you encouraging me to take this step.
Hadley
Well, you sure wouldn’t be with that hottie. Tell me he’s still as gorgeous as he was.
A grin pulled at the edge of my mouth, and I looked around as if Cash might catch me doing something scandalous.
Me
Holy crap, Hads. He’s glorious. Like gazing up at the Sistine Chapel ceiling, mouth hanging open as you stare at its beauty.
Was that sacrilegious? I chewed at the inside of my cheek. I mean, no offense to Michelangelo or anything, but the man was a masterpiece.
Hadley
Ah, now I know the real reason you wanted to find him.
Me
Eww. I did not need that vision. And don’t get excited. That is not going to happen. Believe me. He was not thrilled to see me.
Hadley
Pssh. I bet he wanted to jump your cute little bones the second he saw you.
I freaking wished. I pushed the thought aside.
Me
This isn’t about me. It’s about keeping my kids safe.
It took a moment for her to respond.
Hadley
You count, too, Daze. You deserve to be happy.
Affection pulsed through my spirit.
Me
Just send me all the good vibes that I can actually convince him to do this. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be a challenge.
Hadley
I’m pretty sure my sister is up to any challenge.
Had she met me? I was the reserved one. The quiet one. Well, that was until I stood up and did what I thought was right. Reporting Ethan when it was clearly dangerous. I just hadn’t realized how dangerous it might be.
Me
I’m going to do whatever it takes.
Contemplating what to say, I chewed at my bottom lip then tapped out another message.
Me
I want you to know how much your help means to me. I didn’t want to drag you into this.
Hadley
You’re my sister. I’d do anything for you. For those kids.
Me
I love you so much.
Hadley
And I love you, Daisy. Things are going to work out just like they’re supposed to. Just watch. Keep me updated, okay?
Me
I will.
I set my phone onto the nightstand and pressed my lips together.
Maybe Hadley was right.
I might have been a wallflower. No friends. Quiet. Reserved.
But Cash was sorely mistaken if he thought I was going to give up so fast. I wouldn’t rest until I knew my children were safe.
Forever.