Chapter 45
FORTY-FIVE
I told myself I wouldn’t call my mother. Ever.
But here I am.
For Melody.
“Hello?” an older voice on the other end answers.
I’m hit with all the times she would bitch me out after school because I spent my time writing poetry instead of learning a skill she considered better.
She wanted me to go to college. Become a doctor or something “well-paying and better than making up stories in my head about that girl all day.” She would yell at me for my obvious feelings for Mel; about how she thought it was disrespectful that Melody was friends with me and the guys.
And any time, any fucking time Melody came around, Mom would give her the cold shoulder while being loving and open to the guys.
It killed me.
“Mom,” I say strongly, clearing my throat. “It’s Reis.”
“Reis,” she cries excitedly. “Oh my god, Reis. How are you, my boy? You’re in England right now, right? I’ve been watching your career, son. You… You did it. What you always said you were going to do. Make it big.”
She sounds almost reverent as she speaks. Awed. Like she’s trying to convince me she believed it all along, even after spending most of my upbringing telling me I wouldn’t amount to anything.
“Yes. The guys and I are in the UK. We’ll be heading back to London tomorrow. I need to ask you a favor actually,” I say, jumping right to the chase. I don’t want to stand here and listen to her lie to me to try and get in my good graces. I’m not interested in small talk with this woman.
I’m just hoping her apparent love for this version of me will make it easier for me to get what I need.
“A favor?” She half-laughs, half-scoffs. “You call me up after seven years asking me for a favor?”
I mentally groan. That tone in her voice is filled with disbelief and disdain.
I know right then that I’m not getting anything from her.
“Yeah, I am.” I straighten my spine and steel my voice. “I need to know if you’ve seen Melody around Haven recently.”
There’s a beat of silence that turns from disbelief to anger.
“Melody…Sullivan? That girl who used to hang around with you all?”
“You know who Melody is,” I grumble.
“And you want to know if I’ve seen her? Have you?” My mom scoffs and I can hear her laughing under her breath.
“That is what I asked, yes. Have you seen her?” I know there’s a slim chance. Melody always avoided my mom like the plague and my mom… Well, let’s just say she would never admit to noticing someone “so far beneath her.” I was always one bad moment away from being slapped or disowned.
God, this woman pisses me off.
There’s a reason why I stayed away, and it wasn’t only because of how she treated Melody.
It’s how she treated me .
“Melody Sullivan? No, I haven’t seen or heard from that girl since the day after you left, and I hope I never see her or hear her name again.”
What? My mind short circuits and a fury starts to build in my chest, red tingeing my vision.
“What did you just say?” I ask softly, a little louder than a whisper.
“What?” Her tone changes. She knows what she did… she knows that she fucked up and I’m going to lose my shit.
“You talked with Melody the day after we left?” I ask again, my voice lowering darkly.
“I told you that,” she answers, switching gears.
There’s no fucking way. If she remembers that the last time I talked with her was the same week we left, then she remembers that conversation with Melody.
My mom is slick like that; she remembers everything, especially when she thinks someone did her wrong.
“You didn’t. In fact, you went so far as to say the opposite,” I snap, my voice picking up.
“I did not. I distinctly remember that you and I talked and you hung up on me.” She’s trying to fucking gaslight me out of remembering one of the most heart-wrenching memories of my life. Is she serious?
“You sure as fuck said that to me. “ Melody hasn’t come by, hasn’t asked, she doesn’t care about you.
” Sound familiar?!” I yell into the phone.
My chest hurts as the realization comes around again that Melody really didn’t leave us back then.
She went so far as to ask my mom where I was, and I’m sure this witch was evil to her.
Probably blamed her for everything she could think of.
Why didn’t Melody tell me?
But I immediately know the answer.
She didn’t want me to hurt more.
“You… You cost me something I can’t get back.” My voice is gruff and dangerous, full of violence as I talk. I know for a fact that if she had said Melody had come to see her and was crying, begging, pleading to know where we were, I’d have called. I’d have opened that door to Melody again.
And my mother knows that, too.
She did this on purpose.
“I’ve cost you nothing .” My mother’s voice turns sinister, the last word she says coming out with a hiss that tells me she knows what she’s done. “If I had told you that girl came to see you, you’d never have the career you have today. You’d have thrown it all away for her.”
“My career?” I scoff, just as Kai walks into the room, sitting down to watch me pace the space in my hotel room between the foot of the bed and the dresser.
“The career you didn’t believe I’d ever have?
The career you spent my entire life telling me was a waste of fucking time?
You can’t flip the switch now that I’m successful and famous.
You can’t change the narrative from when I was younger, so don’t fucking start now. ”
Kai stands up, eyes burning with intensity after only hearing my side of the conversation, but I’m too far into my anger to try and clue him in.
“I did what I had to do. And you know what, Reisyn? I regret nothing. Because what I did, or didn’t do, caused this level of success for you.
I’m the reason you’ve become this successful.
A world famous rockstar, touring the world with his best friends, making more money than God, and getting to show the world your poetry. That’s all because of me .”
“No, Mother,” I say immediately with no hesitation, all the fire I’m feeling in my chest flowing through my lips.
“I’m this successful because of me . Because of my friends.
Because of Melody . None of this is a tribute to you at all .
” I pause. “Maybe a small bit. A small bit of ‘Do not believe in your child, because they will prove you wrong.’ That’s the only thing I’ll give you. ”
“You ungrateful little shit?—”
“I don’t want to talk to you ever again. Stay away from me and my family, do you understand?”
She scoffs. “Your family? I’m your family, Reis. Not those friends you live with or that girl that was going to ruin you. Me. I’m your flesh and blood family.”
“They are more my family in every single way that matters. You? Nothing more than the person that gave birth to me.”
“You fucking?—”
“Goodbye, Mother. Stay away from Melody. I mean it, I’ll know. I have people watching her and they’re authorized to protect her, by any means necessary .”
“Reis—” she says, but I hang up the phone before any more stupid shit leaves her lips.
“That sounded cheerful.” Kai rolls his eyes, standing up and crossing his arms. “Melody?”
“She didn’t know Melody was in Haven. Or at least, hasn’t seen her.
She sounded genuinely surprised there was the possibility she could have run into her.
This fucking shitstorm. I just want to go get her.
” I shake my head, sitting on the end of the bed and put my head in my hands.
“This is all my fault. All of it. I was the one that wouldn’t let us explore this in high school because I was so fucking scared it meant she might not choose me.
I was the one that made you all leave her in the middle of the night without even discussing it with her because I was too fucking dumb to think there was something deeper going on.
I was the one who forced us to cut her out of our lives completely.
I was the one who hurt her when we found her again.
I was the one to fucking poorly handle Louis.
I… this is all my fault, Kai. And now I don’t know how to fix it. ”
Kai’s so quiet, I almost think he’s gone, but then I feel a hand on my shoulder.
“It’s not all your fault, Reis.” Kai’s gruff voice brings me some relief from this fucking tornado of guilt I feel inside.
When he squeezes my shoulder, I can’t help but lean into the comfort of my best friend.
“We’re all our own people. All that’s happened?
That’s on all of us, not just you. We could’ve asked.
We could’ve said no. We could’ve done something, anything.
But we didn’t. And that, that is on us alone.
This… situation? It’s on all of us. Don’t carry that ‘I fucked everything up alone’ shit around anymore, okay? ”
I nod, take a deep breath, and clear my throat before I stand up.
“How do we get her back?” Kai asks.
“It’s going to take a lot. Let’s call the guys and I’ll tell you all my plan.”