Chapter 19
Nel walked briskly through the desolate streets, pulling her leather jacket across her body against the icy wind, mind reeling as she tried to make sense of her discovery. Was this Ryan’s child? It had to be, didn’t it? There was no one else.
She cast her mind back, trying to remember the timing of things. Conception would have been sometime in late July or early August, but Ryan had called the relationship off by then, hadn’t he?
*
Nel stood behind Faye in the hall as she knocked gently on Maddie’s closed door.
‘Maddie?’ A pause. ‘Nel’s here.’
There was no reply. Maddie hadn’t been at school all week but the news had travelled quickly.
Ryan Warner had dumped Maddie Marshall on Sunday night.
Nel’s calls and messages had gone unanswered.
When Faye rang that afternoon and asked her to try to talk to Maddie, Nel wasn’t sure it was a good idea, but she went anyway.
She’d stopped at the mini-mart on the way to pick up a Sara Lee frozen cheesecake. Maddie’s favourite.
Faye knocked again. ‘Maddie?’
Still nothing.
Nel bit her nail as Faye pushed open the door and gestured for her to enter.
‘Maddie?’ Nel whispered.
The room was dark. Her eyes took a moment to adjust. There was a sigh and movement as Maddie rolled over to face the wall. Nel sat on the side of the bed.
‘Are you okay?’
Maddie sniffed.
‘I heard about … you know …’ God, what was the right thing to say? Nel didn’t know. She’d never been in love. She’d never even had a boyfriend. ‘I brought cheesecake.’
Maddie rolled over and sat up. Her eyes were swollen.
Nel pulled the cake out of the cardboard box and passed Maddie one of the forks she’d taken from the kitchen drawer before she’d left home. Maddie took a forkful and put it in her mouth. They’d eaten half the cake before the words started tumbling out.
‘He said he needs space to focus on his HSC, but I don’t get why. It’s not like he’s going to uni. He’s just going to work for his dad at Warner Property.’ She put down the fork. ‘I feel sick.’ She groaned and lay back against the pillows.
‘You’re better off without him,’ Nel said, putting her own fork down.
‘I said I could give him space, but …’
‘Maybe it’s for the best.’ Nel paused to gauge Maddie’s response.
‘Why?’
‘You’re too good for him.’
‘If I’m so good, why doesn’t he want me?’
‘Cos he’s an idiot,’ Nel said. ‘He just dumped the best person he’ll ever meet and he doesn’t even know it.’
Maddie smiled. Relief washed over Nel. She’d said the right thing. ‘I never liked him,’ she added, ‘or his stupid brothers.’ It felt good to say what she really thought after spending so long keeping her opinions to herself, afraid that Maddie would choose Ryan over her.
‘You didn’t? Why not?’
‘It always felt like he was making fun of you.’
Maddie shrugged but didn’t deny it.
‘You’re better off without him, Maddie.’
*
Nel swore under her breath, contemplating her friend’s terrible predicament. Maddie was sixteen and pregnant with her ex-boyfriend’s child. And she couldn’t even confide in her best friend because Nel had made it clear she despised him.
God, how could she have been so stupid? After the break-up, she’d assumed everything would go back to the way it was before Ryan came on the scene, but Maddie’s heartbreak had morphed into an obsession.
Everywhere they went, Ryan was there. It had taken Lauren to point out that Maddie was orchestrating these encounters.
‘You’ve got to tell Maddie to stop stalking Ryan,’ she’d said. ‘It’s embarrassing!’
Nel’s cheeks had burned at her own naivety.
She told Maddie it had to stop. ‘He doesn’t want to be with you!
’ she’d said, trying to get through to her friend.
Pain had flashed in Maddie’s eyes and Nel wished she could take the words back.
But the chance encounters didn’t stop. Maddie just dumped Nel for a new friend from the ice creamery, an emo girl in the year above.
Nel’s heart ached. She longed to go back and comfort her friend. Protect her. Tell her everything would be okay.
She stopped abruptly when she reached the wharf, taking in the sight of the old boatshed now transformed into a bar called Drifters. Festoon lights hung from the eaves, giving it an inviting glow.
Inside, cane furniture and bamboo pendant lights gave the space a tropical vibe. It was empty, just as Jimmy had assured her it would be when she’d insisted they meet somewhere quiet, away from the prying eyes of Carrinya locals.
Nel studied the blackboard over the unattended bar, noting the tourist prices.
No wonder the place was empty. The locals must be up the road at the Grand, she supposed, with its sticky tables and happy-hour prices.
She was starting to think they might not be open yet when an impossibly pale barmaid with a pink rinse in her hair wandered through the swinging doors.
‘Sorry, didn’t realise anyone was here,’ she mumbled. ‘What can I get you?’
Nel wondered if she might be anaemic and fought an urge to suggest a blood test. She ordered a nineteen-dollar glass of pinot and chose a table by the window.
She gazed into the darkness outside, where she could just make out a whale-watching boat idle on its mooring, its ‘Next Cruise’ blackboard blank.
Beyond that, Deception Bay was a black void.
She looked over as Jimmy entered. He gave her a nod and went to the bar. When he reached the table he greeted her with a kiss, his woody aftershave lingering as he sat down and clinked his glass against hers.
‘Cheers,’ he said. He took a sip of his beer and wiped froth from his top lip with the back of his hand. ‘What d’you think? Pretty trendy for Carrinya.’
She raised an eyebrow. ‘If it wasn’t completely deserted, I’d feel like I was in Bondi. Have you been here much?’
‘A couple of times. They were getting a decent crowd while there were still some tourists around.’
‘It’s definitely a change of pace from Sydney.’
He laughed. ‘It’s a change of pace from Wollongong.’
She took a sip of wine. ‘What happened in Wollongong?’
‘Long story.’ He paused as though he was trying to work out where to start, or how much to tell her.
‘I was working on the Molly Peters case.’ He looked at her and she nodded.
The tiny blonde girl’s photo had been at the top of every news bulletin for months after she disappeared from a school fete, her tiny face painted like a butterfly, fairy floss in hand.
‘We were making progress—I had some good leads—and then I got taken off the case, completely out of the blue. I’d got “too close to it” apparently, whatever that means. ’
He ran a hand through his dark curls, then he leaned back and shrugged.
‘Anyway, it’s not so bad here. The position comes with a cottage next door to the station so the commute’s a breeze.
’ He gave her a smile. ‘To tell you the truth, it’s kind of nice to be dealing with stolen patio furniture instead of missing children, and I get to spend some time with my folks.
What about you? Do you think Carrinya could be home again? ’
‘Home? God no.’ She shook her head, rejecting the idea without a second thought.
Voices sounded and a young couple entered, hand in hand. Nel watched them walk to a nearby table. They were too young to recognise her but she lowered her voice anyway.
She looked back at Jimmy. ‘I am going to stay a bit longer though.’
‘I thought you couldn’t wait to leave?’
‘Something happened this afternoon.’ She glanced across at the young lovers but they only had eyes for each other.
The barmaid must be out the back. Satisfied no one was listening, she told him about the visit from the journalist, Sophie’s wrist injury and her suspicions about Ryan.
‘Sophie didn’t tell him she’d taken Harvey to the doctor.
She said we met at the library. She’s scared of him, Jimmy. He’s controlling her.’
Nel sipped her wine, recalling an article she’d read recently about how difficult it was to get convictions in coercive control cases.
‘Have you brought charges against anyone for coercive control yet?’ she asked. The new laws had only come into effect a year or so before.
Jimmy shook his head. ‘A lot of victims don’t report the behaviour because they’re terrified of what will happen when their partner finds out.
Or they do report it but then their partner convinces them to drop the charges.
’ Nel sighed as Jimmy went on. ‘The wrist might be the first physical assault. Some of these bastards spend years smashing plates and breaking furniture before it escalates into physical abuse.’
‘Does it always escalate?’
‘Usually.’
Nel thought of Sophie and her kids. What was happening in their home right now? Were they safe or scared?
‘There’s something else,’ she said. ‘I went through Maddie’s medical file.’
He raised his eyebrows. ‘And?’
‘I didn’t expect to find anything, to be honest. I just thought it was a starting point, but I was wrong about that.’
‘What did you find?’
She leaned in and lowered her voice. ‘Blood test results from the week when she died. She went to see my dad about fatigue earlier that week. According to his barely legible notes, Faye thought she might have glandular fever. But she didn’t.
’ A beat. ‘She was pregnant, Jimmy. Ten to fourteen weeks at the time of the test.’
‘Shit.’ His voice was almost a whisper.
Nel glanced around to check they weren’t being overheard.
‘I’ve made a decision.’ She wasn’t sure what he would think but she needed him.
‘I’m convinced Ryan Warner had something to do with Maddie’s death.
For years I’ve pretended it doesn’t matter, that knowing won’t change anything, but now that I’m back here, I can’t accept that anymore.
I hardly saw my dad for the last fourteen years because of what happened.
And now there’s a journalist sniffing around planning to write god knows what.
I’m an outcast in my own home, while Ryan Warner basically owns the place.
It’s time to get justice for Maddie. And justice for Ryan Warner. ’
Jimmy took a long sip. ‘The thing is …’ He seemed to be choosing his words carefully.
‘Solving cold cases is … difficult. Extremely difficult. Even for experienced detectives. There’s a good chance that you’ll get nowhere.
Find nothing.’ He paused to let his warning sink in.
‘How will you cope with that? If that’s where you end up? ’
‘At least I’ll know I tried.’ She felt her resolve strengthen. ‘Maddie was my best friend, Jimmy. I let her down. At the very least, I will have tried to make amends.’
He nodded. ‘You sure this won’t just bring everything back for you?’
‘It’s never left me. I hid from it for two years, then I ran from it for fourteen.’
‘You need to do this.’
She nodded.
‘Then you need to be careful.’
‘I will.’
‘I mean it. This is a small town. God knows what you’re wading into.’
‘I get it, Jimmy,’ she said firmly.
‘Okay.’ He leaned in. ‘So what’s your theory?’ There was curiosity in his eyes, like she hoped there would be.
‘I think she saw Ryan to talk about the pregnancy after I left her at the lighthouse. I think he killed her. Intentionally or accidentally, I don’t know, but I’m certain he had something to do with it.’
Jimmy looked out the window into the darkness, then back at Nel. ‘Tell me what you know about that night. What you know for sure.’