36. CT
36
ct
It was a beautiful fucking day. Maybe it was the sun finally not melting me to my saddle, or maybe it was the fact that my gorgeous girl was riding with me on this cattle drive.
We were working some new trail horses that I’d acquired for the lodge trail riding program and were making sure they would be good for the guests who don’t ride on a regular basis. Using them to help round up cattle was a good way to get them desensitized to new things and beginner riders.
“Is this what I’m for now, breaking in the babies?” Dani calls from atop her mount. The one she’s on is a little spitfire, but Dani assured me that she could handle her just fine.
“Well, that,” I start, giving her a charming grin. “And giving me something pretty to look at.”
Dani rolls her eyes, then gives her horse a little extra nudge. I give mine a kick as well and take off after her. The cattle get rolling down to the pasture where we’re going, and I hear Dani let out a holler from where she’s at.
I look and see her smiling brightly, the sun is kissing her skin, and the breeze is blowing her hair under her hat behind her. She looks like a model straight out of a Wrangler catalog. She has a wild rag scarf tied around her neck and a jean jacket to keep from getting too cold as the months turn to winter.
Fall is hurriedly leaving our small town, and the cold is just on the cusp of overwhelming our valley.
We slow it down, and I swear the cows look at me with relief and blame in their gaze.
Dani rides up next to me and says, “That was fun. I haven’t gone full speed in a pasture in a long-ass time.”
I nod. “It doesn’t exactly happen like it does in the movies.”
She rolls her eyes. “Please, I can’t even watch stuff that has to do with horses. It’s totally inaccurate.”
I laugh at her cynicism and keep pushing the cows down the hill. We’re keeping a good, comfortable pace for everyone now.
“These two don’t seem bothered at all by the cattle,” Dani comments.
“Nah, I didn’t think they would be. They grew up in a pen with cows and goats and such.”
Dani hums and we fall silent. It’s been a few weeks since dinner with our parents, and she hasn’t brought up the ring yet.
I didn’t mean to let her know I had one, but what she probably didn’t realize was that it was the ring I’d bought nearly eight years ago when she’d still been in her program. I was planning on waiting until she was finished and then popping the question, then she could have been home for us to plan a wedding together.
Then everything went to shit.
But I never got rid of the ring. I kept that little spark of hope in my back pocket. I want—no, need to marry this woman. There is no doubt in my mind about that.
The wind shifts its direction, and a gust sweeps through the trees on our left. It’s nearly enough to knock a damn tree down.
And it’s enough to spook our horses.
Dani’s horse immediately jumps to the side. She grabs at the horn and tries to rein her in, pulling to the side, but the young mare already has her mind set and starts to kick out her back legs.
I spin my horse around, calming her down before she gets any wild ideas and dismount as quickly as I can.
Dani’s still on her horse, trying to get her under control, and my chest seizes with panic. “Dani, bail!” I yell, trying to get her attention.
But the wind is still pushing through the valley and riling up all the animals. Even the cattle start to scatter, but I don’t give a shit.
Dani’s ass comes out of the saddle, but her boots are still in the stirrups. She’s trying to calm the horse down, but from what I can tell, the mare is too far gone to get under control.
“Dani! Jump!” I yell again, aiming to get myself closer, my heart pounding in my chest. If I can, I can try to ease her fall a little, so she doesn’t get hurt.
Fuck . I don’t know if she can even hear me.
Finally, her feet come out of the stirrups, a clear sign that she’s getting ready to bail, but she jumps just as the mare bucks harder, and the ass end of the horse knocks Dani in the head, sending her flying and landing hard on the ground.
“Dani!” I yell, running toward her still form, our horses bolting. I get to her and see her eyes pinched with pain, but she’s not knocked out like I thought.
Instead, she’s holding her arm, grimacing. “Fuck me,” Dani grouses.
“Where are you hurt?” I ask, forgoing the “Are you okay?” question, the answer clear.
“My arm,” she moans, and because she’s wearing a jacket, I can’t see what’s wrong. “And my head.”
I gingerly grab her head with my hands and twist her slightly, my fingers come away wet, and when I see the crimson liquid on my hand, I start to feel a well of panic.
A vision that’s haunted me for years hits me at that moment. That same one of her in the hospital, fading before my very eyes.
I can’t fucking let that happen.
Carefully, I scoop her into my arms, bridal style. She lets me, not even arguing that she could walk which adds to my worry. If she was okay, she would fight me. If she was okay, she would insist on walking by herself. If she was okay, she would be cracking jokes and telling me to stop worrying.
Our horses being long gone, I have to walk the few miles back to the house before I can get reception.
Even then, it will be faster for me to drive her to the hospital myself .
Dani moans again and rests her head on my shoulder. “I’ve got you,” I tell her, stomping my way down the hill, through the valley back toward home, trying like hell not to jostle her head. “I’m gonna get you taken care of.”
We’re maybe a mile into our walk when I see someone on horseback heading our way. When we get closer, Logan’s recognizable frame comes into view, and he pushes his horse faster, sensing our urgency.
“What the fuck happened?” he asks, swinging down from his horse quickly. “Dani, you alright?”
She keeps her eyes closed tight and doesn’t verbally answer but gives a nod.
“She got thrown,” I pant the words out, my heart hammering in my chest. “We need to get her to the hospital. I think her arm is broken.”
I keep my voice level, even, and calm. But inside, my panic is threatening to take over.
I can’t allow myself to panic. Not yet.
I keep a singular focus on getting her help at the forefront of my mind.
“Take my horse,” Logan says, and he takes Dani in his arms, letting me get on his horse and then handing her up to me. I adjust her carefully so that she’s straddling me, her ass bumping into the saddle horn, and I place my hand between her backside and the horn. “I’ll take care of things here. Just take care of my cousin.”
I nod at him, and we walk at a hurried pace to get back home. I don’t want to gallop and move her head too much, I don’t know how bad of a concussion she has, but I guarantee from the way that horse hit her, she has one.
When I get back to the ranch, Graham is there near his truck, just getting ready to leave.
He sees us and waves, but I hold a hand up, hoping to stop him.
“I need help!” I yell for maybe the first time in my adult life, and Graham’s eyebrows furrow with concern as he jogs up to us.
“What happened?” he asks, taking her from me so I can dismount.
Dad comes rushing out and asks the same. I give a quick explanation, and Graham offers to drive us to the hospital. Dad takes the horse and promises to call her folks.
She’s not responding anymore, except for a moan here and there, and I just shake my head at my family, unable to find the words needed.
Graham seems to understand what I’m thinking and helps me get into his truck. “Don’t worry, little brother. She’ll be just fine. Let’s get her some help.”
I don’t reply. I sit in the back seat, holding Dani to me, careful not to move or touch her head, or her arm, which is lying across her stomach.
She hasn’t said another word since she told me her head hurts, and I swallow.
My mind races as I think of all the things that could have happened—that still could happen, given that I don’t know the extent of her injuries. It was my fault.
I asked her to come out with me. I asked her to ride that mare. I put her in danger.
If something happens to her, that will haunt me for the rest of my life.