Chapter 7 #2
A month. A month was all Mitch had to get Alex to like him. Was that enough time? Considering his mother had had almost twenty years to warm up to him, the answer was most likely a resounding “hell no.”
Alex bumped his shoulder against Mitch’s. Warmth pooled in Mitch’s chest at the friendly gesture. “Thanks for this,” Alex said. “How did you know I miss skating?”
Mitch shrugged. “I didn’t. Just figured it’d probably been a while since you’d been on the ice. I’d miss it, if it was me.”
The expression on Alex’s face confused Mitch. Furrowed brow with a slight smile. He looked like a pleasantly surprised bear.
“What?”
Alex shook his head. “You surprise me.”
“In a good way, right? ’Cause I’m awesome.”
Alex laughed.
Mitch bit his lip to contain a grin and sat on his hands to warm them. “Do you want to talk about it? Whatever was bothering you earlier?”
Alex’s sigh held an ounce of resignation, but none of the dejection from earlier. “My grandpa has Alzheimer’s.”
Mitch winced. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“No, it’s fine. I don’t mind.” Alex took a breath before continuing. “He doesn’t know who I am. Hasn’t in two years.”
Mitch shifted closer to Alex, offering what support he could.
“I got this for him.” Alex held up his left arm.
On the inside of his wrist, “Hockey” was written in script. The last vertical line in the “H” and the bottom of the “Y” met underneath the word in an “X” formed by two hockey sticks. Before he could think better of it, Mitch reached out and palmed Alex’s wrist, running his thumb over the tattoo.
Alex froze.
“Sorry.” Mitch snatched his hand back. Shit. If Alex was anything like Cody, he didn’t like to be touched except by people he considered his. For Cody, that amounted to his mom, Mitch, and Mitch’s dad. For Alex, the list, however long it was, most certainly did not include Mitch.
Yet. Mitch was working his way there.
“It’s okay.” Alex lowered his sleeve, covering the tattoo. He blinked, and whatever confusion Mitch might’ve seen in his eyes was gone before Mitch could be sure it’d been there to begin with. “Anyway, he wasn’t having a good day today apparently, so I couldn’t visit him.”
“I don’t know what ‘not having a good day’ means. Sorry, I don’t know much about Alzheimer’s.”
“I hope you never have to,” Alex said. “It means he’s angry and confused and doesn’t know what’s going on. It usually happens when he’s overly tired or stressed, so he must not’ve been sleeping well lately.”
“I’m sorry.” Mitch didn’t know what else to say. “Do you visit him often?”
Alex scratched an itch on his hand. “When I’m in Tampa, no. Not as much as I’d like. But while I’m here, I’ve been going every day.”
“Wow. That…” must be so fucking hard. “That’s dedicated.”
“He doesn’t have a lot of time left.” Alex’s smile was sad and it pulled at Mitch’s heart.
“He was a constant in my life growing up. My biggest supporter, along with my mom, when it came to hockey. And he never got to see me play in the NHL.” Alex’s voice was raspy, and his heartache so palpable, Mitch felt like he’d been whacked in the stomach with a hockey stick.
He could only imagine what Alex was going through.
“I don’t know what to say, Alex. Except, that fucking sucks.”
Alex huffed a breathy laugh that sounded anything but amused.
“I was wondering why you came here while you’re out of the game.”
“To see my grandpa mostly,” Alex confirmed. “And I get to visit some old friends too. I’m also using my downtime to write a book. I doubt I’ll get it all written, but I’m hoping to get a decent head start, since I’ll have less free time once this cast comes off.”
“You’re writing a book? What kind? Wait, can I guess? Science fiction,” Mitch said without waiting for a response. “No, fantasy. A kid’s book?”
Alex chuckled, crinkling his eyes at the corners. “None of the above, although I do hope to write a romance one day. I’m actually writing a nonfiction about hockey. Coach Bedley gave me the idea, but you inspired me.”
“Me?”
“Coach Bedley mentioned how hard you work for your team and for your degree. He said he’d never seen a more dedicated player or student, and it got me thinking—what’s the cost of a hockey career? Physically, mentally, emotionally, even personally. What do people sacrifice in the name of the game?”
Mitch gazed at the rink, the ice smooth except on the half they’d skated on. “I don’t feel like I’ve sacrificed anything.”
What had he given up, exactly? His mother’s respect and acceptance? He wouldn’t have had that, even if he had gone into the family business. His social life? He had Cody and he had the camaraderie with his teammates. What else did he need?
“Nothing?” Alex asked. “There’s not a single thing you’ve given up in order to play that you wish you hadn’t had to?”
His personal life. The freedom to be who he was without fear of reprisal.
It was something that hadn’t mattered as recently as a few weeks ago, until he met Alex.
Not that he was under the delusion that Alex had feelings for him yet—if ever.
But the possibility had him suddenly longing for a world where being something other than heterosexual wasn’t a big deal.
“You don’t have to answer,” Alex said when Mitch remained silent. “I’m not trying to dig into your life, just show you the angle I’m using for the book. Professional sports isn’t all money and fame. There’s a darker side to it too.”
“Like what?”
Alex leaned forward, elbows on his knees.
“One guy I interviewed plays for an NHL team in Canada. He got divorced because his wife couldn’t handle all of his travelling.
He gave her up instead of the game. Another guy’s mother passed away just before he joined an ECHL team and he’d inherited her credit card debts.
There were a lot. He couldn’t afford to pay them and rent, so he lived in his car so he wouldn’t have to give up playing the game he loved in order to get a better paying job in an office or something. ”
Man. Mitch couldn’t imagine living out of a car. How would he eat? Shower? Go to the bathroom? But then again, he couldn’t imagine giving up hockey either. Would he make the same decision under those circumstances?
Yes. Definitely yes.
“Anyway.” Alex shook his head and smiled sheepishly at Mitch. “Thanks for bringing me here today.” He squeezed Mitch’s knee. “I really needed it.”
“You’re welcome.” Mitch ignored the tingle in his leg. “Ready to head out?”
“Can we stay a little while longer?”
“Sure.”
“Unless… Do you have somewhere to be? Sorry, we can go.” Alex bent to untie his skates.
“No, Alex, it’s fine. I don’t have anywhere to be.” Nowhere that was more important than helping a friend who needed it.
“Yeah?” Alex shot Mitch a grateful smile that had Mitch’s inside doing weird things. “Thanks. Come on, let’s get back on the ice.”
“Hang on, I’ve got to put my skates back on.”
They didn’t try any fancy moves, simply skated leisurely laps side by side. Alex was a tall guy without his skates, several inches over six feet. On skates, he was a fucking giant. Add his broad shoulders and muscles and unfairly gorgeous face and the man was just…
Mitch wanted to climb him like a tree, right there and then. Of course, he couldn’t. Not until Alex gave him the okay, if that ever happened. He’d just have to keep jerking off to a lonely shower.
“Hey, Alex?”
“Hmm?”
“You know you have an anatomically incorrect cock and balls on your cast, right?”
Alex swore and covered his cast with his sleeve. “I was hoping you wouldn’t notice.”
“It’s purple. Not exactly inconspicuous.”
Alex grumbled something under his breath that sounded like “Fucking Jay.”