Chapter 46
Sean
Bang, bang, bang. No answer…shit, did she leave without saying goodbye to me? Surely she wouldn’t do that but I haven’t heard from her all day and I know she was planning on leaving for Devon this afternoon. I press my ear to Callie’s door, listening for footsteps, movement, anything, but all I hear is silence. I try to call her, but her phone rings out before sending me to her voicemail. Fuck, why would she leave for the weekend without saying goodbye to me? That’s not like her at all. Did I do something wrong?
I’m wracking my brains for anything that could have upset her when I hear a muttered, “Fuck,” from down the hallway. Callie comes stumbling around the corner, four shopping bags overflowing with food dangling from her tiny frame as she struggles against the weight to keep herself upright.
I rush towards her and take the bags from her arms. “Here baby, let me help.”
Her hand flies to her chest in shock. “Jeez Taylor you scared me, what are you doing here?”
“I thought you’d gone to Devon and not said goodbye to me.” I pout and she strokes my prickly jaw, sighing.
“Sorry, no I wouldn’t do that. I’ve just had a shitty afternoon since I finished training.” She unlocks her dorm and gestures for me to follow inside.
I dump the shopping bags onto the counter top and follow behind her like a puppy as she turns on the coffee machine, grabbing two mugs from the top cupboard. I can sense the tension in her shoulders without even needing to touch her, I can hear the millions of thoughts whirring around inside her mind, I just don’t know what’s causing them.
I plant my hands on her shoulders, massaging the knots out of them as she continues making our coffee. “Baby, what’s bothering you?”
She spins around, letting her forehead fall to my chest and blowing out a sharp breath. “My mum isn’t doing well at the moment. My dad called me this afternoon and said I should skip my competition to go home and spend the weekend with her.” I thread my fingers through her soft curls as she continues. “And that only means one thing…he doesn’t think she has long left.”
Oh my god, I wasn’t expecting the conversation to take such a dark turn. I bracket her jaw in my hands, forcing her to look at me, holding my eyes for a moment before dipping my head and touching my lips to her’s. “Do you want to skip the competition to go and be with your mum?” She shakes her head, her hands lightly resting on my waist. “Mum forbade me from skipping it, you know what she’s like, stubborn as hell.” “Like someone else I know.” I smile and I see Callie’s mouth pull up at the sides.
She swats at me and turns back to the coffee machine, pressing the button on the top and watching the steaming liquid filter into the mug. The piercing aroma fills the air and I breathe deeply, trying to keep my mind on anything but the fact that Callie’s mum could die soon.
“Do you want me to come with you this weekend? I don’t have any games.” I say, tipping my face to kiss her bare shoulder as she mixes the piping coffee and hands it back to me.
“No Sean it’s ok, but I appreciate the offer.” She smiles mildly at me, fluttering her eyelashes innocently and I just want to stitch her to my skin so she never has to be without me.
She’s the strongest woman I’ve ever known, she doesn’t need me but I know I make her life better. That’s not me being cocky or arrogant either, I’ve seen the change in her like everyone else has since she met me. But I decide not to argue with her over coming to Devon, letting her have her space if that’s what she needs, I know she’ll call if she needs me.
I leave Callie’s dorm around 8pm after cooking a meal for Molly, Anais and Callie before they all make the long drive down to Devon. She’ll be back on Monday after her competition weekend and I already can’t wait for her to get back…maybe I have attachment issues, or maybe I”m just madly in love with this girl. I don’t know how much longer I can wait to tell her how I feel, the words almost tumble off my tongue every time I”m around her and I can feel how close I am to just blurting it out one of these days. I’m currently lying on my bed, one arm resting behind my head and the one tapping away at my phone, watching the time tick by as I wait for my girl to text me that she got to her hotel in Devon safely. There’s no chance of me sleeping knowing she’s still on the road, the drive taking her just over four hours which means she won’t arrive until after midnight. The time is coming up for midnight now and I”m waiting with bated breath for her to message me, telling me she’s ok and that she arrived safely. She’s sharing a room with my sister Lois which I know she’s nervous about as the two of them haven’t spoken much since the panic attack incident when Lois inadvertently found out that Callie and I are together. I did text my sister earlier this week to warn her about being nice to my girl whilst they were sharing a room for the weekend. Did she reply? No, of course she didn’t, she can be a brat sometimes but the truth is she has a heart of solid gold under that tough skin of her’s. I’m just hoping sharing a room will force them to reconcile and not let my relationship with Callie come between what was a strong friendship.
Ping!
“Thank god for that,” I mutter to myself as I open the text message from Callie.
Callie:
‘I’ve just checked into my room, Lois isn’t here yet so I think I’ll just go to bed, the drive took it out of me. I’ll text you in the morning, goodnight. X’
Sean:
‘Oh come on, I don’t even get a tit pic before you go to sleep? I waited up for you to make sure you got there safely, I think I should be rewarded for being the best boyfriend ever. X’
A few minutes go by with no response and I assume she’s had enough of me for one day and gone to sleep. But after a moment my phone pings again, this time telling me I have a picture waiting for me. My cock is hard before I even open it, eyes widening with disbelief when I see a full screen view of Callie’s round, perky tits. Her skin is golden tanned, tiny freckles splattering across her torso, up to the swell of her breasts. Damn, I just want to suck her nipples into my mouth and feast on her soft skin. It’s going to be a long weekend without her.
Callie
Competition days are always go, go, go. From the second I open my eyes it”s an adrenaline rush, the flipping of my stomach as I watch my teammates compete, the surge of endorphins when I land that difficult dismount I’ve been trying to nail for ages. I love competing, it’s in my blood to be ravenous for a win, claws out the entire time but also laser focus turned on and able to think of nothing else but smashing my routines. I’m currently top of the leaderboard, Anais nipping at my heels with only two points less than me and Lois following after. The team event is not until tomorrow, so for today at least I”m competing against some of my closest friends, but it’s all part of the sport. We don’t take losing personally and learning to lose graciously is a huge developmental milestone in elite sport, it’s just as important as winning gracefully. I drop down onto the bench at the side of the floor area, stretching my calves before I have to go and complete my last and least favourite piece of all, vault. As I push my heels into the carpet, leaning down and flattening my chest against my shin — that’s now littered with purple bruises from falling off the bars yesterday — I feel someone sit down beside me. When I glance up from my stretch I see Lois fiddling with her fingers, biting anxiously at her nail as she watches the scoreboard, waiting for the judges to determine her fate.
“You did well Lo, don’t stress.” I mutter, pulling out some tape from my bag and re-strapping my ankle before I have to start my least favourite vault move ever.
She’s still biting at her nails when I sit up straight, still feeling the very heavy tension between us that I”m desperate to shift. When she got to the hotel last night I was already sleeping and we were up and ready by 6am this morning so I’ve not had chance to try and clear this stale air between us.
“Lois come on, please talk to me. Look, I know you”re mad that I”m dating your brother but I can’t help it, he was going to have me whether I liked it or not.” I try to hide my growing smile when I think about Sean, as always he’s making me blush without even being here.
Lois’ score flashes onto the board, moving her into second place and her face lights up along with a muttered, “Thank god,” before she turns back to me with a deep sigh. “I’m not mad at you Callie, I”m just hurt that you kept it from me.”
I sigh now too, knowing she’s totally right. “I know, I”m sorry. I just didn’t want you to think badly of me for being with someone like Sean, who is known for his hobby of flitting between women like they’re flavours of ice cream.”
Lois titters. “That’s one way of describing my brother,”
“I really like him Lo, please don’t let this come between us.” She pats a hand on my bare thigh and stands up, reaching her hand down to help me to my feet too. “It doesn’t change our friendship Cal, I still love you and hey, I guess one day you could be my sister-in-law.” She grins and my stomach does it’s own little backflip. I’m not sure if it’s a good backflip or not.
“Erm, I”m not sure that’s on the cards just yet Lo,” I laugh and she nudges my shoulder, gesturing to Ellen who is stood waiting for me at the vault, hands on hips and eyes like a snake.
I huff and kiss her cheek. “Better go before Ellen gouges my eyes out.” Lois pats my ass as I move past her, yelling after me, “Go and smash it Cal!”
Oh, I intend to.
I’m well and truly fucked when I get back to my hotel room and not fucked in a good way like when Sean has broken me with his 9 inch dick. No, I”m fucking exhausted, mentally, physically, emotionally. I dump my bag on the ground, making a mental note to sort all of my sweaty shit out later and sink back onto my bed. Lois lands beside me, pulling out her phone and beginning to scroll through her messages from today. We both groan with exhaustion, a hint of frustration laced through both of our guttural sighs after the competition ended with neither of us collecting a gold. After I fucked up my vault I was dropped to second place, Lois pushed to third and Anais following in fourth. Ellen was pissed to say the least, but not as pissed as we were at ourselves for not coming top of all the universities like we usually do. My phone screen is filled with messages when I turn it on, not having had chance to look at it since 8am when we started warming up this morning. The first name I notice is of course Sean’s, I scroll through his many messages of support from this morning, the latest one from only an hour ago asking me to call him when I get back to the hotel. Just as I”m about to hit the call button, desperate to hear my favourite voice, I notice my dad has tried to call me a few times today too. My stomach sinks and before I have chance to think too much into what this means, he calls again. I answer immediately and can hear the thumping of my heart in my ears as I wait for him to speak. “Callie why haven’t you been answering your phone? I’ve been trying to reach you all day.” He says, so quietly it’s making my skin itch with anxiety. Usually if I’d ignored his calls all day he’d be yelling, scolding me for not being at his beck and call. But his voice is totally foreign today, a soft, raspy sound there that I don’t think I’ve ever heard before. I clear my throat. “I was at my competition Dad sorry, everything ok?” It”s not, I can already feel it deep in the pit of my stomach.
Then there’s a silence on the other end of the phone, a silence so heavy I feel like it might crush me. I can hear him breathing, stuttering and uneven as he waits, for what I don’t know but I can’t bear this any longer so I mumble quietly, “Dad?”
He inhales a long breath. “Cal, I”m so sorry to have to do this over the phone but…”
“No,” I gasp, my lungs closing in on me and my ears prickling with heat, waiting for the words to fall from his lips, the words that will make me want to curl up in a ball and die.
“I’m so sorry honey,” he chokes on his tears, “but she passed away this morning.”
My ears are ringing, my head burning as the red hot flames crawl up my neck like a wildfire, spreading to every crevice of my skin and lighting me up like a house engulfed in flames. My eyes instinctively flood with tears, my vision a total blur as they roll down my cheeks in a heavy stream, leaving a trail of ice on my burning skin. I hang up the phone without saying another word, grabbing my chest where it feels like my heart might fall out of it.
Lois twists her face to look at me, seeing the tears and sitting up straight. “Cal, what’s wrong?”
I collapse into her, gripping her t-shirt so hard I”m worried I might tear a hole in it, she holds me as I weep and god, do I weep. I scream a low, throaty bellow as she hugs me tight, my entire body feels like it’s made of jelly, my legs and arms totally numb. When my mum’s beautiful, childlike grin enters my mind is when I totally lose it, rolling away from Lois and curling up in a ball, lying on the bed in the foetal position and rocking myself repeatedly as I sob with pain into my knees.
How can this be happening? How can she just be gone? Just like that. I saw her two fucking weeks ago and she was fine! I don’t understand, I don’t understand anything right now.
I don’t know how long I”m in that position but I do hear my phone ringing on repeat for what feels like days. When I finally feel able to lift my head from where it’s almost crusted to the pillow with tears, I see Lois sitting on the other side of the hotel room drinking a glass of water and watching me like a hawk.
When our eyes meet she stands up and approaches me, tenderly laying her hand on my arm as I sniff with the still trickling tears. “Callie, I”m so sorry, I saw the text from your dad when you were asleep.” Did I sleep? I don’t remember sleeping. “He’s tried to call you…so has Sean.”
Sean. I need him, right now, I need him.
I sit upright. “Where’s my phone?” I croak, my voice hoarse and dry. My throat hurts, my head hurts, everything hurts, especially my heart. Lois immediately retrieves it from her back pocket and puts it into my outstretched hand. I nod in thanks and unlock the screen, finding Sean’s number and pressing it with shaking hands.
Lois stands up from the bed. “I”ll give you some privacy Cal.” She leaves the room just as Sean picks up the phone, his voice full of pride and excitement, the total opposite of how I”m feeling. “Hey baby, I heard you totally smashed it today, I”m so proud of you.”
I can hear the grin in his voice and for a split second the usual warmth spreads through my chest. Until the blazing fire returns and makes me want to die again.
I sniffle, speaking through my tears. “Can you come here?”
He falls silent for a beat and then whispers, “Are you crying?” I hear him shuffling around but I don’t respond. “Tell me what happened, tell me now Callie.” His voice is stronger now, that usual protective instinct wading through his deep tone.
I choke on my tears again. “My mum she…” God, I can’t say it out loud, it”s too painful. “She’s gone Sean.” I wail, dropping my phone onto the bed beside me and burying my soaking wet face into my hands, sobbing loudly.
“Shit,” I hear Sean murmur, my phone still laying on the bed beside my knee. “I’m coming baby, I’ll be four hours ok?”
He hangs up before I can reply but I don’t care, all I care about is that he’s coming. I don’t think I’ve ever been so desperate to be in his arms than I am now, I need him to hold me so tightly I can forget just for a moment that my heart has been ripped from my chest and stamped into the ground in front of me. I need him here and fast.