Chapter 24 Griffin
Griffin
Sabrina: I’m sorry for how I reacted.
Sabrina: Please don’t throw away what we have.
Staring at the texts and realizing that I feel nothing for Sabrina anymore is a major fucking relief.
I had felt like a colossal disappointment after cheating on her. I still feel shitty about it because that’s not the kind of man I want to be. But I also realized that my desire to be with Jake was a lot higher than it had ever been with her.
I don’t know if that says something about sexuality as a whole or if it just means that I never really felt a connection with her to begin with. That’s honestly not something I feel like diving into without a bottle of Jack Daniels and maybe Mack as a sounding board.
I’m trying not to completely implode over the fact that I might really want something real with Jacob. Our date had been…the best date I’ve ever been on.
And we didn’t even do anything other than kiss and hold hands like high schoolers. And yet, I felt more connected to him than I had to Sab even after two years spent together.
It was eye opening.
I’m walking past one of the science buildings when I catch a glimpse of Hughie halfway down the sidewalk with his backpack slung over one shoulder.
So of course I jog to catch up with him.
I’m huffing slightly by the time I get next to him. When I close the gap, Hughie turns and looks at me with that expression that says you’re interrupting my existential peace for what, exactly? which I ignore because, again, it’s Hughie and weird is his baseline setting.
“Hey,” I say, breath still slightly brisk like I just sprinted instead of lightly jogged across the quad. “How’re you doing? What are you up to?”
He shrugs and narrows his eyes at me. “I’m heading home for the day. Morning skate tomorrow, so figured I’d take the evening and actually rest.”
And then he pauses like he is waiting for me to say something, he shoots me this side-eye that could slice through steel.
“You wanna come over and play video games?” he asks, in a casual tone.
And I jump at the chance like someone offered free pizza because yes, I want to be anywhere that isn’t my own head right now. Video games with Hughie are basically emotional duct tape with a controller attached.
“Hell yeah,” I say, maybe a little too eagerly, because I’m a disaster, but also because the idea of sitting on a couch with Hughie feels exactly like what my brain desperately needs and then some.
He nods like this is a normal request and we start walking together toward his place.
Oh and there’s the obvious perk that he lives with the guy I’m currently obsessed with.
We get to Hughie’s place with the pizza box smelling like fucking heaven and my stomach grumbling with excitement. My hands are also choosing to sweat because I’m so obviously nervous. Which is something I refuse to think about too hard.
Until we walk in and I see Jacob.
He’s at the table with his textbook open, glasses on, and hair still damp like he just got out of the shower. He’s holding a pen between his lips with his brow furrowed, totally locked in like he’s about to rewrite the damn textbook himself.
And I just… stop.
Because he looks fucking gorgeous.
He always does, but this is something else. The way the light hits his skin, the way the glasses sit on his face, how effortlessly handsome he looks here. It fucking wrecks me.
He looks up and our eyes meet. I swear his face changes for a second like he didn’t expect to see me. Because of course he didn’t. I didn’t text him and let him know I would be showing up when I practically chased Hugh down on campus.
He shifts in his seat and gives me a friendly smile that goes straight to my gut.
“Hey,” he says, voice soft.
I nod back and try not to stare like a love sick fool. It’s exceptionally hard to not to focus on his mouth, or his shoulders, or the way he smells like his citrus body wash. I try, and probably fail, not to let it show that I’ve been thinking about him every fucking day.
Hughie tosses the pizza on the counter in the kitchen.
I sit down in the living room and try to act cool. This isn’t the first time I have been here. It’s just been, well, too long. This is what life what like freshman year before I let girls and booze and parties ruin my first college friendship.
Jacob keeps reading at the dining room table and I keep trying not to put my full attention on the gorgeous man.
Hughie grabs a couple slices and strolls over to him. He grins down at Jacob, still buried in that damn textbook. “You cool if me and Griff play some games? Or are we killing your concentration?”
Jacob glances up, glasses slipping just a bit down his nose. “Thanks for the food. No, you’re good. I’m almost done anyway.”
He’s so calm and at ease that it’s unreal. Meanwhile, I’m sitting here wondering how the fuck I’m supposed to function with him five feet away.
Hughie walks back to the couch, and my limbs finally remember how to move. I look over at Jacob again. I want to go to him. I want to kiss him. I want to curl around him and not have to pretend anymore.
And then I shove all of that down. Hard.
I grab a slice of pizza and take a bite. The pizza’s good. It’s from the spot downtown that we used to get all the fucking time freshman year. Hughie’s got the game loaded on the TV. I hit my slice with hot sauce because obviously I do, then slump back into the couch.
I get focused on the game and it’s unreal how easy it is to fall back into a friendship with Hugh. I won’t say it out loud but I missed this so much. The ease that his presence gives.
Out of the corner of my eye I see Jacob standing up and slipping out of the room. He disappears into his room like I’m not here.
The controller’s in my hand, but my brain’s shorted out.
Hughie snorts and then he shifts, looking over at me. And I already know what’s coming.
He lifts a brow, slow and obvious.
I shoot him a look. What?
The asshole fucking smirks at me, “You should go invite him to play.”
I don’t move. I keep my face forward. The truth is that I want to go grab Jake and make him hang out with us.
I want to spend time with him around his brother and best friend.
I want a normal fucking relationship where we are around each other without hiding.
But we haven’t had that discussion and I don’t know how he would respond.
“Nah,” I mutter, feeling dejected. “Let him do his nerd shit.”
His smirk grows like he’s watching a rom-com play out in real time. Then he hits me with, “Just go, you fucking weirdo.”
It’s not mean. It’s Hughie-code for I know you’re a dumbass, but I still support your emotional nonsense.
I sit there for one more second. Then I drop the controller.
I stalk down the hall to Hughie’s quiet snickering and I stop at Jacob’s door. I knock once and then wait.
“Yeah?” he says from inside.
The door cracks open. He’s pulling a shirt over his head. It’s plain white, tight across his chest. I catch just enough skin to have my heart racing and my cock stirring to life. His hair’s still damp, his skin flushed, and my brain just stops working.
He turns and sees me, a smile playing on his lips. I don’t say a word. I walk into his room, close the door behind me, and kiss him.
Hard.
I’ve been needing to do this since the moment I walked into this apartment and saw him studying.
He makes a sound, somewhere between a groan and a sigh, and it undoes me completely.
I pull back just a little, breathing heavy, eyes locked on his.
“Come hang out with us,” I say, voice low and rough. “Please.”
He smiles up at me, completely sweet and at ease, and nods.