Chapter 17 #2
“A little, but there’s still a long way to go before he feels comfortable joining us for family dinners.”
“I don’t blame him. Sometimes they’re okay, but when mother is in a mood…” Ellis shook his head. “Maybe I could officially meet him soon? I’d like to get to know him, maybe even be friends someday.”
“I’ll let him know. He might like that,” Syrus agreed. From what he recalled, Eiri was twenty-eight. Seven years younger than him, but hopefully not too old to befriend Ellis.
They came to a stop in front of Ellis’ door and he surprised his younger brother by pulling him into a quick, one-armed hug. “Thank you for the advice. I appreciate it.”
“I’m glad you’re finally noticing that I’m smarter than you all think,” Ellis teased, but he returned the brief embrace. “Let me know what Eiri says. I’m free a lot when I’m not in the library.”
“I will. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Yeah, I’ll… I-I’ll see you in the morning.”
Syrus didn’t have to look to know Xan was coming down the hallway. His brother’s blush said it all. Shaking his head, he rubbed Ellis’ hair again, leaving him muttering under his breath to go join his cousin.
“Does this mean you’ve pulled your head out of your ass after all?” Xan asked when Syrus joined him.
“I’ll grovel in private, I promise.” Syrus opened the door to the room he’d been staying in, locking it behind him. It wasn’t warded to the same level as his personal suite, but it would do until he settled back into his own rooms. With any luck, that would happen sooner rather than later.
Only after he’d checked the room to make sure it hadn’t been disturbed in his absence did he turn his attention back to Xan. For his part, his cousin just appeared amused, leaning on the back of a plush chair and watching Syrus.
“Well?” he prompted.
“I don’t even know where to start.” Syrus crossed to the chair beside the one Xan was leaning on and collapsed into it, sighing heavily.
Xan rolled his eyes, settling into the other chair. “Why don’t you start with whatever prompted this change of heart you seem to be having?”
“Of course you’d want to start with the part where I beg for your forgiveness and tell you that you were right all along.”
“Naturally.” Xan tossed his curls over his shoulder, giving Syrus an expectant look. He should have known his cousin would actually want to hear the words.
“Fine. I thought about what you said last night, and you were right. The idea of spending the rest of my life watching my back, wondering if Eiri is going to stick a knife in it, sounds horrible. I also realized that he would never make the first overture for peace, not when he thinks he’s surrounded by enemies. ”
“So you took him into Lodie? To what end?”
“I actually didn’t plan on heading into the city. I just thought he’d relax more if we were near the water, so I took him to the beach. Then our driver was being rude to him, so I sent her home.”
“You stood up for him against one of your own people?” Xan said, surprised, which just irritated Syrus all over again.
“Is it that shocking to believe that I’d defend him when someone is being openly rude and insulting him?”
“Honestly? Yes.” Xan held up a hand to stop his immediate protest. “It’s just that it’s no secret you two don’t get along. Not to mention that you’ve been enemies for years. I know you, and I know that you’re a good person, but he’s Canjiri.”
“Maybe I judged him too harshly and I’m trying to make up for it. Did you ever consider that?”
“I’m really glad to hear that,” Xan smiled, which didn’t answer the question, but since Syrus hadn’t meant to actually ask it, he didn’t press the matter.
“Hearing that I fucked up makes you happy? Thanks,” he grumbled, trying not to sulk when Xan just laughed.
“No, that’s not why I’m happy. I’m just glad that you’re not basing all your assumptions about your husband on prejudice and rumors.”
“To be fair, he has tried to kill me on multiple occasions, and more than a few of my scars are due to him.”
“That defense would only work if you hadn’t left your own marks on him in the past, as well.”
Syrus winced, thinking of the dark bruises marring Eiri’s wrists.
He hadn’t felt guilty at the time, but now, his conscience twinged.
It was one thing to hurt each other in a battle, but this was different.
They were married now, and even if Eiri had cut him first, he knew he shouldn’t have responded with violence.
“I don’t want to fight with him anymore, but I don’t know what to do,” he said softly, meeting his cousin’s eyes. “My mother expects me to force him into line and make him start acting like a Vaetrean, but…”
“But?” Xan leaned in closer, resting his hand on Syrus’ wrist.
“But the more I get to know him, the less I want to do that,” he confessed. “Why can’t he be who he is? It’s no secret I married a Canjiri raider. He’ll always look Canjiri, no matter what he wears. I guess I don’t understand why it’s so important that he pretends to be like us.”
“And that, my dear cousin, is why you make a better soldier than a politician.” At Syrus’ confused look, he shook his head. “It’s not about him, really. It’s about power.”
“I don’t understand.” This was why Syrus preferred his life as a soldier. When he stepped into a fight, he knew who his enemy was. When it came to politics, friends became enemies in the blink of an eye, and everyone was only out for themselves.
“If Queen Delia can parade Eiri around dressed as one of us, acting like one of us, it shows others that she was able to break a proud raider. It makes the Canjiri look weak. The longer he defies her, though, the more the tables turn. People will start to question her authority if she can’t manage to get a single Canjiri nobody to fall into line. ”
“Which means she’s never going to let this go,” he murmured. “As long as he refuses to bend to her will, she won’t relent on either of us.”
“Unfortunately for you, you’re right.”
“So what do I do? I don’t want to fucking break him, Xan.
” Not anymore. Maybe it was because they knew each other a little more now, or maybe it was just that bleak, resigned look on Eiri’s face and how he couldn’t get it out of his head, but the idea of forcing him to give up who he was just didn’t sit right with him anymore.
“Give me some time. I’ll see what I can come up with.
In the meantime, I suggest you keep doing what you’re doing.
Get to know him, build up the trust and respect between you.
Whether either of you wants to admit it, you’re on the same side in this fight, and you’re going to need each other if you’re going to get through this in one piece. ”