Chapter 19 #3
Eiri nodded. “The Canjir had no leverage, nothing of real value to trade, save for whatever we could get from the ocean. The ones who came to Vaetreas assumed that centuries of goodwill and free trade would help negotiations. Obviously, they were mistaken. The king at the time realized the new power he held over the Canjiri. Without the food and supplies he held, the islanders would die. He held their lives in his hands, and everyone knew it. Rather than stir empathy or compassion, though, it woke his greed.”
“Some of our books cover this part,” Ellis said when Eiri fell silent. “They talk about it as if it were an economic victory for Vaetreas, though.”
“I’m sure they did,” Eiri muttered.
“King Tyrat negated old trade agreements, claiming they were no longer valid, as the Canjiri king who’d signed them had died in the eruption.
The new ones he offered more than doubled the price of goods and laid heavy taxes and tariffs on anything the Canjiri imported.
” Ellis stared at the table as he spoke, and for the first time, Syrus felt the shame of his history sink into him.
“He knew he could do whatever he wanted, and my people had to agree or die,” Eiri continued. “So, with no other choice, they signed. Those agreements have remained in place ever since. The first raid on a Vaetrean town happened two months later.”
Silence, heavy and tense, fell around them when Eiri finished his story.
Ellis had obviously known at least part of the history of their people, but Syrus and Xan were stunned.
Syrus, especially. He stared into the darkness, trying to come to terms with the realization that his own ancestors had created the raiders that he’d spent his entire life fighting against.
“I assume any attempts to revisit those agreements since then have failed?” he finally asked, but he already knew the answer to that.
“No monarch of Vaetreas has even taken an audience with a Canjiri ambassador about trade issues since then.”
“I imagine at first they didn’t simply because it would cut into their profits,” Xan said, voice hard. “More recently, it’s likely they couldn’t without looking like they’re making concessions to raiders.”
“Public image is more important than human lives.” Syrus scrubbed his face with his free hand, sighing tiredly. “I hate politics.”
“Canjiri ambassadors haven’t even been allowed in court since Queen Delia took over,” Ellis said, and it was pure luck that Syrus looked up just in time to see a flicker of expression on his youngest brother’s face.
When he said their mother’s name, for a moment Syrus was sure he saw something dark and angry in his brother’s eyes.
He didn’t get a chance to ask before Eiri spoke, but he made a mental note to talk to Ellis later.
“I was surprised Kien was allowed to come with me at all.”
Syrus silently thought that their lives would be improved if Kien had stayed behind in Maizar, but he wasn’t foolish enough to say that out loud.
“Thank you for telling us,” he said instead, smiling when Eiri looked up at him in surprise. “You’ve given me a lot to think about.”
“I’m sorry to dump all this on you right now. We’ve got enough to worry about with the party.”
“No, I’m glad you told me. It’s long past time that things changed for the better.”
This time, the silence that wrapped around the four of them was a gentler one, giving them space to think about everything they’d just learned.
They finished the rest of their meal in comfortable contemplation.
He’d have liked to leave it at that, but there was only so long they could be gone before someone came looking for one of them.
“So, I want to make sure we’re all on the same page,” he said. Xan brushed off his hands and settled back in the chair. Ellis and Eiri both shifted in their seats so they were facing Syrus.
“From what you’ve told me and what I’ve explained to you, it’s fairly straightforward,” Xan shrugged. “You two are caught in a dick-measuring contest with the queen, basically.”
Beside him, Ellis choked on a breath. He spluttered, his face going red. Xan slid some water over to him, and Ellis hurriedly took it, but he didn’t meet Xan’s eyes.
“That’s certainly one way to put it,” Syrus said dryly, shooting his cousin an exasperated look. Beside him, Eiri put his hand over his mouth, but even that wasn’t enough to hide his startled smile.
“What? It’s true,” Xan protested. “Are you alright there?” He patted Ellis’ back.
“Fine. Sorry. You surprised me.” His voice was rough from coughing, and the blush still hadn’t faded. As soon as this mess was dealt with, Syrus was going to need to have a long talk with his baby brother.
“I wouldn’t phrase it quite the way Xan did, but he’s not entirely wrong,” he went on. “She needs to be seen as someone capable of keeping everyone in line, and that includes Eiri. We need help in figuring out a way to appease her while not just giving in to her every whim.”
“I don’t believe I’ve ever seen you question an order from your mother before. This is a refreshing change.”
“I live to entertain you, Xan.” Syrus rolled his eyes. “Any ideas?”
“One or two, but nothing that would provide any immediate protection,” Xan said.
“When Mother makes a decision, it’s very hard to sway her from it,” Ellis agreed.
“Maybe the easiest thing to do would be for me to just sit down and talk to her about it in private?” Syrus suggested. “Perhaps she’d be more open to change if she didn’t have the eyes of the court on her?”
“If anything, she’s worse in private,” Ellis said, unusually somber. “She doesn’t have to check her temper when it’s only family.”
“Maybe the easiest thing to do would be to let her win?”
Syrus had been watching his brother, trying to figure out why he’d reacted like that to their mother, but Eiri’s words drew his full attention back to his husband.
“What are you talking about?”
At some point, Eiri had pulled his feet up to rest on the edge of his chair, bringing his knees to his chest. He wrapped his arms around them now, as if he was trying to make himself smaller. Or trying to protect himself.
“I’ve been thinking about it all day, trying to find a solution, and I don’t think there is one,” he murmured.
“Your mother, and most of your people, hate me for who I am. She will not compromise with me or allow me to have any semblance of a victory. I can keep fighting it, but nothing is going to change. So… maybe the easiest thing is to stop fighting.”
What the fuck? What had happened in the last few hours to cause such a change in Eiri? Where was the proud, stubborn raider he’d talked to this morning?
“Xan? Ellis? Could you give us a moment?” he asked, never taking his eyes off Eiri. He heard them murmur agreements, saw them leave from the corner of his eye, but he never took his focus off Eiri.
“You didn’t have to send them out,” Eiri protested when the door closed behind the other two.
“What’s going on, Eiri?” Syrus shook his head when he saw that same look in Eiri’s eyes from earlier. “The truth this time. What happened after I left? This isn’t you. You don’t give in just because the problem is complicated.”
“You have no idea if this is who I am or not,” Eiri snapped, crossing his arms over his chest. “You don’t know anything about me!”
“That’s bullshit, Eiri.” Syrus matched his pose, eyes narrowed.
No. He refused to go back after they’d made so much progress.
“I’ve fought you for years, and I’ve seen how you are.
I’ve watched you get backed into a corner, surrounded by half a dozen soldiers, and still manage to get out of it and escape.
It always infuriated me how you kept slipping out of every trap you landed in.
So don’t sit there and tell me I don’t know you. ”
“That’s different! Fighting on a dock isn’t the same thing as defying a queen!”
“It’s different, but it’s still a fight, and I’ve never seen you give up!”
Eiri shoved back in his chair, staggering to his feet and pacing away, putting the length of the room between the two of them. Syrus rose but stayed put when Eiri turned. Rather than the anger he’d expected, Eiri’s eyes held a bleakness that stole his breath.
They’d fought on opposite sides all their lives, driven by a hate that’d separated their people longer than anyone alive could remember.
Every time Eiri and his raiders slipped through his fingers, he’d wanted nothing more than to catch him, throw him in prison and let him pay for his crimes.
Even then, though… even then, he wouldn’t have wanted to see this defeated look.
There was no honor, no pleasure, in defeating an opponent that’d already given up.
“Eiri…”
“Don’t.” He shook his head, taking a step back when Syrus tried to close the distance between them. “There’s no winning this fight, and you know it, so why are we arguing about it? Your mother will never bow to the wishes of raider trash.”
Syrus couldn’t count the number of times he’d lobbed that insult at Canjiri in general, and Eiri specifically.
Honestly, it was more unusual to hear Eiri’s people called by their actual name.
‘Raider trash’ was one of the milder insults thrown at them on a daily basis.
But now, knowing what he knew now and hearing it from Eiri’s lips, calling himself trash, struck him low in the gut, harder than any physical blow he’d ever taken.
“So you’d rather give up, bury your culture and your identity, than fight for yourself?”
Eiri scowled. “I thought you’d be happy? Isn’t that what you’ve been wanting since the day we met? Wasn’t that the whole reason you’ve been kind to me?”
“We already talked about this. Yes, I was lying to you at first and trying to gain your trust. It wasn’t my finest hour, and I’m not proud of what I did.
I admitted I was wrong, though, and I thought we’d moved on from that.
Yesterday was real, and I haven’t lied to you since we made peace with each other. ”
“You say that, but why should I trust you?” Eiri’s ire fled as abruptly as it’d appeared and he seemed to shrink, wrapping his arms around his slender frame and hunching in on himself. He looked exhausted, pushed to the breaking point and shoved over the edge, leaving him crumpled and beaten.
“I meant it when I said I would earn your trust,” Syrus said.
He took a cautious step forward, then another when Eiri didn’t shy away from him.
It put them within reach of each other, but he didn’t reach out, sensing it wouldn’t be appreciated at the moment.
“Will you please tell me what changed, so I can try to fix it?”
For a moment, he didn’t think Eiri would respond.
He had his eyes on the floor, studying the plain tile like it held all the secrets of the world in its pale gray depths.
Patience had never been Syrus’ strong suit, but he waited now and was finally rewarded when Eiri looked up at him, conflicted and exhausted.
“Nothing changed. Not really,” he whispered. “I talked to Kien earlier, and something he said stuck with me. He thinks I’m being foolish for trusting you and forsaking my heritage. He’s the only bit of home I have left and…”
“And hearing him say something like that had to be really hard.” Syrus struggled to keep his voice low and even.
He could punch the ambassador for this. The trust he and Eiri had been building was too fragile to withstand any real test, and for Eiri to hear the one person he did fully trust say that would have shattered it.
“I know you said you don’t want me to give up who I am, and maybe I believe it, but you went from hating me to protecting me almost overnight. It’s hard to make myself believe it’s real.”
“In all honesty, I’m still trying to figure everything out myself,” he admitted.
When Eiri’s brow furrowed in question, Syrus shrugged helplessly.
“My mother was very specific about her demands, and I’ve never gone against her.
She’s not only my mother, but my queen. I’ve been taught since birth to obey her, and I have.
I’ve followed orders and never questioned why she had me do certain things. ”
“So, what changed for you?” Eiri asked, echoing Syrus’ earlier question.
“Talking to you. Getting to know you.”
“You spent one day with me, and that was enough to make you turn on your queen?” Eiri asked, skeptical, and Syrus shook his head.
“Not turn on her, no. I’m not sure I could ever do that.
But spending time with you and seeing how your people are treated here made me think.
Most of my initial reactions to you were based on what I’ve always been taught about your people.
Some came from how often you fought me and evaded my traps, of course,” he added, pleased when he saw Eiri’s lips quirk in the tiniest smile.
“I know now that most of it was based on assumptions I’d made before I knew anything about you, and it got me wondering if the same thing is affecting my mother’s actions concerning you. ”
“We have our own ideas of Vaetreans back home, things that have been pushed into our heads since we were little. Perhaps Kien is just as biased as your mother, and that’s why he said those things?” There was an almost desperate hope in Eiri’s voice, like he needed to believe the words.
“That’s likely the case,” Syrus nodded. “I know we both still have a long way to go before we can trust each other, but we can’t let other people change our minds and set us back.
It’s hard when it’s people we love and trust, but there’s no other way we can make this work between us.
I don’t want to keep fighting you, Eiri, and I don’t want you to change. ”
“I’m so tired of fighting,” Eiri breathed, and Syrus couldn’t have stopped himself from responding to that pain in his voice even if he’d wanted to. He crossed the final few inches between them and pulled Eiri into his arms.
The other man tensed, instincts probably flaring up, telling him Syrus was a threat, but only for a moment.
A shudder ran down the length of Eiri’s body, then he collapsed against Syrus’ broad chest. Eiri stood a few inches taller than him, but Syrus made it work, using his hard-earned strength to hold Eiri as he fell apart.