Chapter 31
Eiri
Never in his wildest imaginings could Eiri have ever dreamed the day would come that he would sail into the harbor at Maizar on a Vaetrean ship, with a Vaetrean husband, wearing Vaetrean clothes.
More precisely, he’d dressed in the outfit he’d worn to the princess’s birthday party, as had Syrus.
While Vaetrean in cut, the Canjiri details were clearly visible.
The short time frame of their departure from Lodie meant communications had been brief and to the point.
His family only knew that he was returning home with his Vaetrean husband to oversee the new mines.
Any letter he sent would be read before leaving the palace, so he hadn’t included anything personal.
Which meant that, as far as his family knew, Eiri still hated Syrus and was bringing an enemy into their midst.
He didn’t want to start this off on the wrong footing, so he’d purposely chosen this outfit, knowing the statement it would make when his people saw him.
“Is it strange that I’m nervous?” he murmured to Syrus.
They stood together above deck at the bow of the ship, watching the port grow closer and closer.
A crowd of people awaited them and while they were still too far away for him to make out any details, he knew the figure standing alone at the very end of the dock had to be Akari.
“Do you think it’s going to go badly?”
Eiri shook his head. “My mother will have a lot of questions for us, but she’ll be easier to reason with than your mother. As for Akari… well, she’ll probably have you wrapped around her finger by the end of the day.” He glanced up, giving Syrus a wry smile. “She’s good at that.”
“And the rest of the Canjiri?” Syrus hid his own nerves well, but he was likely just as anxious as Eiri. He still hadn’t fully regained his strength, not that his stubborn husband would ever admit it.“Should I expect something similar to the welcome you received in Vaetreas?”
Eiri looked back out over the water toward the waiting crowd, considering the question.
Relations between Canjir and the rest of the world, in general, tended to be fraught, but nowhere was it as bad as Vaetreas.
His people had settled more easily into Nevarre, with their progressive attitudes.
It helped that the monarchy of Nevarre had never passed the heavy taxes and tariffs on Canjir that Vaetreas had, which was the main reason they only raided Nevarrean towns if they were desperate.
Gavarria had spent twenty years locked in a civil war, leaving them too busy to bother the islanders.
Both sides welcomed Canjiri mercenaries, though, and some of the older Canjiri had brought back quite a bit of money from fighting back then.
Now, though, the country was a mess as it attempted to recover and those few Canjiri that remained had enmeshed themselves into the new regime.
To the far north, the kingdom of Sarkhyr stood alone and had since they closed their borders a hundred years ago. He’d heard rumors of rumblings up there, but no one seemed to know the details, and he’d been far too focused on his own troubles to worry about their strange northern neighbors.
Truly, Vaetreas was the only kingdom on the continent that seemed to harbor such deep-seated prejudice against his people.
Many Canjir, himself included, vehemently disliked Vaetreas, but he couldn’t imagine any of his own doing or saying some of the more reprehensible things he’d encountered in Lodie.
He shook his head again. “They may not know what to make of you at first, but give it a little time,” he said.
“The queen’s policies weren’t your doing and even the other raiders will know you were just doing your job.
We never held it against the foot soldiers, just the people in charge.
” He bit back a smile, unable to resist teasing his husband.
“It will help that you never actually arrested any of us.”
“Not for lack of trying, brat,” Syrus grumbled, but he took it with a begrudging smile. “That’s good to know.”
“It’s going to take time before they accept you, make no mistake about that, but I think once everyone understands that you and I are on the same side, it will make things easier.”
Syrus turned to face him, so Eiri did the same, tearing his attention away from the dock and over to his husband.
Syrus didn’t say anything, though. He just studied Eiri’s face with a strange look in his dark eyes.
He’d caught Syrus watching him a few times now in their days on the ship, always with a soft fondness that made Eiri’s stomach flutter and his heart clench.
This felt different. More important, somehow.
“Syrus?” he asked when the silence stretched. Around them, the ship was a frenzy of sound and motion, sailors moving around and calling to each other as they readied to dock, but here at the bow they’d created a little corner of peace for themselves.
“It’s still strange to think about sometimes. That we’re on the same side now,” he clarified when Eiri just gave him a confused look.
“I know what you mean.” Eiri stepped closer, loosely draping his arms over Syrus’ shoulders.
Physical affection still felt somewhat strange and new between them, after so many years spent trying to run a blade through each other, but he was quickly growing addicted to it.
Syrus seemed to feel the same, because every time Eiri did this, he immediately wrapped his arms around Eiri’s waist, like he did now.
“I don’t know much about your people, but I can imagine that politicians are the same, no matter where they come from,” Syrus murmured. “That means that there will probably be people on the island who will be about as happy as my mother was to see us united.”
Eiri sighed heavily. “You’re probably right. There will also be plenty of people who will have sided with Kien. He didn’t make the decision to kill me on his own and there’s no way to know who was in on the plan.”
“Did your mother ever reply with any word about him?”
“Unfortunately, no.” So long as Kien C’Marlo was in the wind, he posed a very real threat to them, but there was only so much they could do.
There was no telling when or even if he’d return, and Eiri refused to spend the rest of his life jumping at shadows in case one of them held the former ambassador.
“We’ll just have to prepare as best we can,” Syrus said, unknowingly echoing Eiri’s thoughts. “The more present danger is going to be Queen Delia, I think. There’s no telling what sort of maneuvering she’ll get up to with us out of the way.”
“Politicians really are the same everywhere.” Eiri leaned his head against Syrus’ shoulder for a moment. “I believe my mother and a few others went into this genuinely hoping for real peace, but I’m not foolish enough to believe that there weren’t backroom deals being made.”
“Then it already sounds like we have more allies in Canjir than we ever did back in Vaetreas. Not a single one of the queen’s council members had the good of Canjir in mind when they approved the treaty. All they cared about was lining their pockets.”
“My mother and I aren’t as close as I would like, but I’ll be the first to acknowledge her integrity.
She cares about our people and puts Canjir above almost everything else.
” Including him, in the end. He knew his mother loved him, but not enough to put him ahead of the safety and well-being of Canjir.
“I suppose I should thank her when I see her.”
That halted Eiri’s maudlin thoughts in their tracks. “Thank her? For what?”
“For you.” Syrus smiled and leaned in, brushing a soft kiss across Eiri’s lips. “I know it’s not what you wanted in the beginning, but if she hadn’t forced you into this, we wouldn’t be where we are now.”
“That’s certainly an optimistic way of looking at it,” Eiri said, raising an eyebrow, but he had to admit that Syrus had a point.
“With everything that’s happened, I’m learning to always try to find the good in every situation. Otherwise, I’d lose my mind.”
“I think there are some people who’d argue that you already have.”
Syrus just laughed quietly and leaned in again, resting his head against Eiri’s. “Maybe I have, but if losing my mind means I found you, I’m alright with that.”
“That was so sappy,” Eiri groaned to hide just how much those words affected him.
His stomach fluttered, his breath hitching in his chest. It felt almost like the ground had disappeared under his feet, that moment of breathless anticipation right before the fall, and he remembered the thought he’d had while locked up in a prison cell, believing Syrus to be dead.
I could have loved him.
In the panic and chaos that had followed and the last month of frenzied preparations, he’d pushed his emotions aside so he could focus on what was going on. It all came rushing back with Syrus’ sweet words and soft smile, leaving him dazed.
I could fall in love with this man.
“It’s true, though,” Syrus murmured, breaking through Eiri’s thoughts and giving him something to latch onto as his entire world rearranged within him.
“I know we started out badly, but it was worth it to get to where we are now. Though I could have done without the poison. I’d already learned my lesson by then. ”
He couldn’t help but laugh. “Only you would think all of that nonsense was worth it.”
“It was. It is. You’re worth it, Eiri.” Syrus paused, and Eiri froze when he saw the look in the other man’s eyes. “I love you.”
Eiri closed his eyes, blinking back the sudden moisture before a tear could fall.
He couldn’t seem to draw a steady breath and his heart raced in his chest, leaving him lightheaded.
A strange, bubbly feeling welled up inside him, those three words echoing over and over in his mind.
He knew he should say something, do something, anything, but it was like he’d completely shut down, everything in him latching onto those words, to the exclusion of all else.
“I’m not expecting you to say it back,” Syrus went on when Eiri didn’t speak. “I don’t know if you feel the same way and it’s fine if you don’t. I just wanted to tell you now, before I lost my nerve again.”
One look at Syrus’ impossibly dark eyes was all it took to see that he meant it. Eiri saw the fear there, the nerves, but also the determination and courage it’d taken to admit his feelings without knowing how Eiri felt in return.
He thought about lying. For half a moment, the span of a heartbeat, he considered saying the words back just to ease Syrus’ mind. He couldn’t, though. They’d promised to be honest with each other, no matter what, and he didn’t know if he could say it and truly mean it.
“I… I care about you,” he admitted softly, barely louder than the shush of water against the wooden boards of the ship. “I think I could fall in love with you once we have more time to just be together.”
“That’s more than I could ask for. We have all the time we need and I won’t push you for anything you’re not ready for,” Syrus assured him. “I’m more than happy with what we have right now and if this is how it remains, I’ll consider myself a very lucky man.”
“I’m really glad I never stabbed you like I wanted to when we were younger.”
It was Syrus’ turn to laugh in surprise and he did, grinning at Eiri. “I’m really glad we never killed each other, too.”
For now, that would be enough. There was no doubt in Eiri’s mind that, once they built their life together on Canjir, he would come to love Syrus.
He’d always known him as a man of integrity, even when they’d been actively fighting each other.
Syrus could have easily bowed to Queen Delia’s wishes.
It would have been easier than battling his own ingrained hatred and putting aside a decade of antagonism to get to know his new raider husband.
Instead, he’d gone against all expectations and put the needs of others ahead of himself and had nearly paid with his life.
Every time he thought he had Syrus Vardor figured out, the man surprised him all over again.
There was no question of whether he could fall in love with him, given time.
Luckily, as Syrus had said, time was one thing they had.
Eiri didn’t have to rush, for once. With the arrival of Syrus on Canjir, things would change.
They already were. Part of their agreement with the queen was the understanding that the impossible levies against Canjir would be lifted, finally allowing them to buy and trade like everyone else.
They would no longer have to steal what they needed to survive, which meant that, like Syrus, Eiri was now retired.
He’d have to figure out where he fit into the new Canjiri society that they were building, but he didn’t regret anything.
There was still work to be done. The long history of cultural and political differences between Canjir and Vaetreas was too vast to be overcome simply because he and Syrus had worked out their marriage.
By essentially exiling them, Queen Delia had cut off their ability to create any change in Vaetreas.
With time, he knew they could bring a good portion of the Canjiri around, particularly the younger generations.
The older folks had suffered their entire lives under the cruelty of Vaetrean laws and were less likely to accept them, but Eiri still held onto hope.
Even in Vaetreas, they had allies. Ellis was far removed from the throne and Xan wasn’t in the line of succession at all, but they had power and influence in their own ways.
Ellis more so than Xan, apparently, and Eiri realized only then he’d never taken the time to talk to Ellis to learn how he’d saved them.
But whatever secrets the youngest Vardor held, perhaps he could use them to dismantle some of the systems of oppression in his country.
Right now, though, all of that was behind them.
Ahead of them, their new life awaited. He could see Akari on the docks, waving frantically, a huge smile on her face.
Behind her stood his mother, along with the rest of the council and what looked like half the population of Maizar, all watching them arrive with a mixture of curiosity and trepidation.
Eiri and Syrus would have their work cut out for them as they forged a new future for their people, but he believed with all his heart that they could do it.
He held onto that belief as the ship docked, and he looked over at Syrus.
“Are you ready?”
Syrus took Eiri’s hand and he could see the same determination in Syrus’ eyes as he nodded. “I’m ready.”
Eiri took a deep breath, then he and his husband stepped off the ship to face their new future. Together.