Chapter 33 Kieran
Kieran
The remainder of our ride to Huntley House is quiet—reflective.
Gen’s response to pleasure nearly brought me to tears, seeing how it broke something inside her.
Knowing I was the first and only man to think of her desires hurts in a way that makes me want to rage, to kill any man who ever deigned to touch her.
I had to bite my tongue to keep from asking for a list of her past lovers, just so I could hurt them.
This damned blueblood culture that exalts a gift over a person has forced Gen to live her entire adult life believing her worth is tied to a curse that makes her a tool for men. Has no one considered how this “gift” is destroying her?
Hell, I want to kill her own family for not seeing that she’s so much more than her fucking blueblooded gift. I even hate myself for the part I’ve played in her suffering. If I’d stood my ground—if I hadn’t run when she told me to leave—I could have protected her.
But in the end, we both carry scars from what happened after I left. What matters now is the present, and I’ll be damned if I ever let anyone harm her through that cursed gift again.
After hours on dusty roads with only a few short stops to stretch, we finally arrive at Huntley House. The old manor, with its red-brick exterior bordered by rocky hills, was once my refuge as I built my empire around helachite. I haven’t been here in months.
“Where are we?” Gen asks groggily, sitting up from where she’d been leaning on my shoulder.
“My home, actually. Welcome to Huntley House.”
She peers out the window at the moonlit manor.
It’s nothing like Fairbright, or any of the Ashcrofts’ other residences.
It’s not even as impressive as my home in Icelantica.
But there’s no place I’d rather be than back in these rocky foothills, the mountainous border still capped with snow and the smoke from the mines drifting through the night sky.
This place took my father from me, forged me into the man I am today. I should hate it, yet I keep returning—drawn back by the lives here, by the people I’ve worked tirelessly to give a better life to. Because I knew if I didn’t, no one ever would.
“Your home? You’ve owned a home in Naseria all this time, and you never thought to contact me?”
I shake my head. “Perhaps I didn’t want to be in contact with you, Princess.”
It isn’t that simple. At first, it was impossible to reach her.
Then, after I heard about her gift, I was angry and jealous—I had no way of knowing what that gift was doing to her.
Had I known, I wouldn’t have hesitated to come for her.
Instead, I poured everything I had into building this business and eventually grew numb to Genevieve Ashcroft.
But now that she’s back in my life, I cannot imagine living without her. Still, that isn’t rational. Even after our time in the carriage, I know she’ll choose the crown over me. It’s what she does—and I no longer have it in me to stop her.
She slides her hand into mine as a footman opens the door. “Why wouldn’t you want to contact me if you could?”
I swallow and tell her the truth. There’s no point in keeping secrets anymore. “Once I learned of your gift, my pride kept me away, Princess. It was wrong. I see that now.”
She studies me, as if searching my face for something. “We’ve both been wrong about many things, I’m afraid.”
I step out of the carriage, taking in the hills glowing in the moonlight, and offer her my hand as she follows.
“It’s beautiful here. So wild.”
“Quite unlike Fairbright.”
“What’s that smoke in the distance?”
“The mines. We’ve developed a process to smelt the tracks and train components so they can absorb the natural helachite from the ground—allowing trains to run safely without risking workers or passengers to overexposure.”
Gen cocks her head, a grin spreading across her face. “Kieran, when did you become so brilliant?”
“I’ve always been brilliant, didn’t you know?”
She laughs, shaking her head. “And so humble.”
I rest my hand on her back, guiding her toward the housekeeper and butler—both survivors of the old mining operation and its egregious mishandling of raw helachite.
I see how Genevieve takes in their scarred skin, their slow, careful movements, their disfigured hands.
She doesn’t waver, only approaches with that quiet confidence I’d hoped she still possessed.
Both look at me in surprise. I’ve never brought a woman to Huntley House, always keeping this life separate from my former lovers in Icelantica.
“Princess Geneveive, I’d like you to meet Mrs. Andrews and Mr. Bridge.”
Andrews looks shocked, but Bridge maintains his composure as he bows. “It’s an honor, Your Highness.” Andrews catches herself and curtsies deeply before giving me a pointed, questioning look.
“Excuse me, Your Highness,” she says. “We were not properly prepared for you.” Her eyes narrow at me in unfettered disapproval.
Gen smiles widely and replies, “It’s no trouble at all. I apologize for catching you off guard with this visit.” She gives me a teasing look before leaning toward Andrews and whispering, “I wasn’t prepared either I’m afraid.”
I shrug. The truth is, Andrews keeps this place in perfect order—always ready for guests, even though I rarely have reason to entertain. “Give her the Lavender Room and have some clothing sent up. We had a mishap with Princess Genevieve’s luggage.”
“Of course, sir. How long can we anticipate your stay?”
Gen looks at me, then back to Andrews. “I apologize, but it may be quite a few days. I’m interested in better understanding the helachite mines and how Mr. Blackwell runs his operation. Then there’s the railway. I’d like to learn more about the infrastructure involved.”
“Of course, Your Highness. We’re honored to have you for as long as you choose to stay.”
I guide Gen into my home and bring her to the parlor. I know Andrews and Bridge need time to prepare the other staff for the princess’s arrival. If I don’t make us scarce, they may just turn on me.
“Well,” she remarks, looking at me expectantly as she smooths her skirts and sits on the sofa, “this is quite the surprise.”
“What part is surprising?” I ask, taking a seat across from her. A footman brings in a tray of refreshments, and I wave him out of the room.
“I think the most surprising thing is that I thought you were dead for so long. Then I came to terms with it, knowing you were in Icelantica, but to see that you have a manor just a day’s carriage ride from Fairbright?
I’m unsure what to think. Do you truly hate me so much that you couldn’t even pen me a letter? ”
“Gen,” I say, moving toward her until I’m kneeling before her, “you gave me no reason to think you wanted me in your life any longer. Just this morning, you were playing the part of the haughty princess, turning me out again.”
I hate that I’m already putting distance between us again, but whatever happens next—whether she accepts me or chooses the crown over me—won’t be decided tonight.
She presses her hands to my chest, pushing me lightly. “That isn’t fair! You’ve been nothing but the demanding redblood, planning my ruin!”
Despite her words, her tone is playful, and the smirk on her lips reminds me of all the times I used to tease her until she teased me back. Riling Genevieve Ashcroft out of her stuffy, composed crown princess role is something I’ll never tire of.
I give her a knowing look. “You’ve tried to drive me away twice now, Princess. What more evidence do I need that a correspondence wouldn’t have changed a thing?”
She keeps her hands fisted in my shirt, and I can’t tell if she wants to pull me closer or push me away. Hell, I don’t think she knows either.
“But—but…” She shakes her head, then looks away from me, the old pain I saw in the carriage returning.
“When I heard you were dead, I didn’t know how I’d survive it.
Until then, I was so sure you’d return to me eventually.
I told myself you just needed new experiences, and then you’d see that you belong to me. ”
I stare at her in confusion. “What part of you pushing me away made you think I’d ever return?”
“I think back on that often. We were so young, and my mother was adamant I make an advantageous marriage to continue the blueblood lineage. If I could go back, I would have fought for you. But I can’t go back—I can only look to the future.
What you said earlier today is true. I haven’t allowed myself to make decisions I actually want.
I always think of the crown. I can’t help it.
Even this morning, I tried to force myself to accept a marriage I already knew would be disastrous.
In truth, I wish I could have felt something for him, but my heart hasn’t been mine to give for a very long time. ”
I swallow thickly. The shell I’ve built around my heart threatens to crack under the weight of the woman who caused it to harden.
Despite her rejection and the circumstances that nearly ruined me, I’ve never stopped thinking of Genevieve Ashcroft.
She dug her way into my life long ago, and I could never let her go.
I ask the question that’s been on my mind all day. “Who has your heart, Gen?”
She lets out a soft laugh, a smile playing on her mouth as she leans forward, so close her words brush my skin. “You do, you fool! You always have.”
I grin before pressing my lips to hers. “I’m no fool. I knew from the moment you fainted I still had your heart. I just wanted to hear you admit it.”
She tilts her head, then kisses me again. I want to stay in this moment forever—in this fragile illusion that she’s truly mine—but I know it won’t last. Even as she claims I have her heart, I can’t quite trust her words, or the heart that once turned mine hard.
I pull back. “Let me show you to your rooms. Tomorrow, we’ll visit the mines, then decide what comes next.”
She gives me a quizzical look. “You don’t want to share a room with me?”
“I would love nothing more than to share a room with you, Gen. But we shouldn’t—and you know why.”
“Propriety has already been damned by my running toward your carriage, away from my fiancé.”
I huff a laugh, standing and pulling her up beside me. “I wasn’t thinking of propriety.”
“My gift, then? Did it bother you too much?”
I shake my head. “You’ll be more comfortable alone.”
“No, I don’t think I will,” she says, pressing her body against mine.
I stop her, even though the urge to hold her all night is almost too much to resist. “I’ve been exposed to high levels of helachite for many years. I’m not the same as I once was, and I don’t sleep beside others because of it.”
She gasps softly, studying me. “What do you mean?”
“Did you notice Mrs. Andrews’s and Mr. Bridge’s features?
They worked in the mines from childhood until I closed off the dangerous mines.
I brought them here and gave them employment that allows them to live comfortably.
I’ve employed dozens of former miners—too injured or ill to work elsewhere.
We’re all damaged in ways you can’t see.
We all have restless sleep, insomnia, or both. ”
I want to admit that’s why I kept returning to her room at night—that seeing her sleep safely gave me the only peace I’ve known in years. But saying that aloud would make me sound mad, even though she must understand now why I couldn’t stay away.
Her brow furrows as she looks at me with a stifling amount of pity.
“Don’t pity me, Princess. I won’t have it.”
“It isn’t pity. I just feel responsible. I ruined your life—no wonder you wanted to ruin mine.”
But I don’t want to ruin her life, not really. Far from it. I want her to fill mine, to make all this damn work and suffering mean something. I want what I lost and thought I could never have again.
But not until I know she wants it too.
Because I may have Geneveive Ashcroft’s heart, but that means little if she’s not willing to let me take it.