Chapter 14 #2
She smiled up at him, her face bright with remnants of her pleasure and also just true enjoyment.
She was achingly beautiful in that moment, genuinely perfect in every way.
And he realized that he was truly coming to care for her.
Perhaps more than just care, even though that made no sense and could have no good end.
He would leave. She had made it clear she only wanted an affair.
To long for more was folly.
“They’re all watching us, you know,” she said softly.
He looked around and shrugged even as he turned her. “I’m sure. You are in great demand, after all. I’m sure it irritates them to no end that a bastard no one is the man with you in his arms.”
“They’re watching us because they want to know how I tamed such a wild thing,” she said. “How I made you dance with me like a very proper gentleman.”
“That’s because they don’t know what I was doing on the terrace a moment ago,” he said. “They wouldn’t think I was a gentleman then.”
She tilted her head. “Perhaps, despite your best efforts, you are both, Silas. A dashing rogue, yes. But also a little bit of a reluctant gentleman.”
He stared at her as the music ended and the other couples took their bows. She’d said something so seemingly benign and it felt like it cracked him open a fraction. Let some light into places that had always been as dark as the corner where he pleasured her.
He had no idea how to respond to her observation, but was relieved of any obligation to do so when they were approached by a couple.
She smiled at them and Silas realized this was the sister he hadn’t yet met, Evelina.
Like the youngest, Julia, this woman looked a great deal like Arabella.
Her eyes weren’t the same—Evelina’s were brown—but otherwise they had a similarly shaped face, the same dark hair.
“Evelina, Harry!” Arabella said, and drew their group off the dancefloor so they wouldn’t block the next set of dancers.
“What excellent timing. I don’t think you’ve met my…
” She trailed off and looked at Silas. “My friend, Silas Windham. Silas, this is the Duke of Southwater and my sister, Evelina Comerford.”
“Your Grace,” Silas said with a slight incline of his head.
He actually knew Southwater, though he doubted the man recalled him.
They’d been acquainted with each other as boys in school.
Southwater had been a few years older. Silas had watched him bully some of the younger children and had ended up with a black eye for the trouble of defending them.
“Mr. Windham,” Southwater said, all disinterested politeness. “I’d heard you were back in Town for a few weeks. Pleasure to see you. How is your brother?”
Silas glanced toward Evelina, who hadn’t yet had a chance to greet him thanks to the intrusion of her protector. “He’s doing better, thank you for the inquiry. And Miss Comerford, I’ve heard so much about you.”
Evelina extended a hand at last and he shook it. “And I think you know I’ve heard so much about you,” Evelina said with a glance toward her sister.
“Evie,” Arabella said, and actually blushed. “She is terrible, she’ll tell you awful tales. All lies.”
“Hmmm,” Silas said with a wink toward her. “That only makes me want to ask questions.”
“Dearest, would you like some punch?” Southwater asked.
Evelina glanced up at him with a soft smile. “Oh, that would be lovely, thank you.”
The duke inclined his head and then left the three of them to weave his way through the crowd.
Silas watched him with a frown. To fetch punch for his lover seemed kind on the surface, but Silas wondered if it was more out of disinterest in talking to Arabella and him rather than truly looking out for Evelina’s care.
Not that it was any of his business.
“You know I met your younger sister, Julia, at an event not so long ago,” Silas said, refocusing on the two women.
“Yes,” Evelina said with another wink for Arabella. “She told me all about it. And so you’ve met all three Comerford Courtesans. Do you have an opinion on the lot of us?”
He felt Arabella tense beside him. Just a little bracing for whatever he’d say, which made him wonder what other men had talked about when they discussed the sisters. Actually, he could well-imagine the disgusting things some men would come up with when faced with three sisters in the life.
“I think I’m most stuck by your strong bond,” he said, and meant it. “I’m afraid I’m not particularly close with my siblings, so to see how easy you are together is a true pleasure.”
Something on Evelina’s expression softened and she reached out to briefly squeeze Arabella’s hand. “Well, you ought to see all three of us together, then.”
“A tornado is what that is,” Arabella teased.
He smiled. “I’ve seen a tornado, in America. Terrifying things, but intensely beautiful.”
Evelina laughed. “Then it sounds like the perfect description for us. Terrifying but beautiful.”
“I find all three of you lovely,” he agreed. “But only slightly terrifying.”
Evelina watched him a moment, her humor still on her expression, but her gaze focused. She was reading him, just as Arabella did sometimes. “How did you find the former colonies?” she asked. “You were there a long time, yes?”
“Over five years,” he said. “I traveled a great deal, saw cities and the countryside. There is great beauty there. And their wilderness is very different from ours. Here, you walk for a little while in one direction, you’ll find a town or house of some kind.
There…well, if you wander too far you’ll never be found.
Lost to the woods and the brush forever. ”
“That sounds fascinating,” Evelina said with a sigh.
“I-I made some sketches during my time there,” Silas admitted, almost not realizing he was going to be so honest.
“You did?” Arabella asked, her eyes wide as she turned to face him more straight on. “I had no idea you were an artist.”
“I wouldn’t say an artist, but it’s impossible not to be in such a place and not capture it in some way, and I’ve never been much of a writer.”
“If you’ve brought the pieces, I’d love to see them,” Evelina said. “And it sounds like Arabella would feel the same.”
“I’m happy to share, as long as you do not judge my attempt at art too cruelly,” he said.
Evelina glanced over her shoulder. “Where in the world is Harry? He’s always been interested in America. Thinks we should take it all back by force, I think, for the resources there.” She slightly rolled her eyes, just barely perceptible.
“I think I see him there with…” Arabella pursed her lips. “I’m not sure which earl that is, it’s hard to tell when they’re not facing me.”
“He must have gotten sidetracked,” Evelina said. “I’ll go fetch him, as we intended to go home early before we spotted you two dancing. It was a great pleasure to meet you at last, Mr. Windham.”
“Silas,” he said. “Mr. Windham is far too formal.”
“Silas,” she repeated. Then she leaned forward and kissed Arabella’s cheek. He thought he saw her whisper something, but couldn’t hear it. “Good night, dearest. We’ll work out when I can have the grand exhibit of his work.”
“Good night,” Arabella said, and together they watched her make her way toward Southwater. The duke glanced down at her when she reached him, put his arm around her as he continued to speak to his companion.
When Silas looked at her, Arabella was frowning slightly. He caught her hand and lifted it to his lips. “Another dance, my lady?”
She nodded. “I’d love to.”
They went back to the dancefloor and spun back out together. This dance was a little more lively than the waltz had been earlier, but it wasn’t a country group dance, at least, so he could keep her in his arms even as they hopped and skipped their way around the floor together.
“You worry about her,” he said.
“Evelina?” she asked.
He nodded. “Do you not approve of her duke?”
“She’s been with Harry for two years now. That’s a lifetime in the world of courtesans. She tells me she’s happy, she even seems happy most of the time. But I suppose old habits die hard and I always look to how I can protect her.”
Silas tilted his head to look at her a little more closely. There was more to it than that, but he doubted Arabella would say more. On some level, he understood it. If there was trouble between Evelina and Southwater, that was their business, not anyone else’s.
“Well, both your sisters are amazing women,” he said.
That slight change of subject caused Arabella’s face to light up. “Thank you, I agree. I do adore them both. We were close as girls and to still be so close now is a true pleasure.”
“I can picture you all easily as girls, giggling together and causing trouble. What about your mother since I know you weren’t close to your father based on our earlier conversation.”
The pleasure that had come over her face when she spoke of her sisters faded now. Replaced by pain and then by the mask she put up around subjects that had real impact on her. Her expression became calm and blank and her gaze darted to the side slightly.
“My mother was long dead,” she said.
Silas wrinkled his brow because she made no effort to tell that story, nor more of the one she’d already mentioned about her father. She was shutting the door on him. Shuffling him into the same category where she put her protectors. He had opened up to her, but she wouldn’t do the same with him.
And he understood it all. He knew exactly why she kept her emotions, her pains, separate from everyone around her. Yet he wished he could find a way over that wall she had erected around herself. Wished he could delve deeper and find the depths of her that hadn’t seen the light in years.
And that was most definitely unfair of him. For both their sakes.
He turned her on the dancefloor as the song faded and when she changed the subject, he didn’t pursue it. He let her be light and fun and nothing more. And even as he reveled in all that she was, he also felt bereft with the knowledge that he could only see a tiny fraction of her.
And that she’d likely never allow him more.