Chapter 30 #2
I was careful to hide behind the wall as I observed the beautiful dresses of the women and the fine tunics and jackets of the gentlemen, glittering with gold stitching and medallions.
My parents were down there as well, in conversation with the King and Queen. I also spotted Thatcher and Cai, observing the amiable young women around them.
“I was wondering where you were.”
The sound of his voice made me jump.
Once again, I felt like he’d caught me doing something I wasn’t supposed to.
“What are you doing up here?” Lance asked.
How did he even find me?
“I’m just watching the party.”
“I can see that. But why aren’t you down there with the other guests?”
“Not old enough.” I shrugged. “Mother says I will make my debut next year.”
“Ah, I see.” Even though Lance wasn’t much older than me, I was suddenly very much aware that I was up there alone with a boy, no chaperone in sight. How did I keep getting myself into these situations?
Lance had a cup of wine in his hands, which he offered to me. “Would you like some?”
“I’ve never had wine before.” Mother said it was improper for a lady to drink wine before she was out in society.
“I promise one sip won’t kill you.”
I didn’t know whether I was trying to prove something to him or to myself, but I grabbed the cup and took a big gulp.
It was nothing like the grape juice I’d had before. Instead, it had more of a sour and bitter taste as it ran down my throat.
My expression must have given away my distaste. Lance chuckled as I handed back the cup and wiped my mouth.
“How do people get drunk on that stuff?”
“Easy,” Lance said. “The more you have, the easier it is to drink.”
“How many cups have you had?”
“Two.” He looked down at the cup. “Maybe three.”
The musicians below started a new tune, and a few people gathered to dance. I pressed myself against the wall to avoid being spotted by the guests.
Lance stood next to me, with his shoulder leaning against the wall, allowing him to look as casual and unfazed as he always did.
“How long are you and your father to stay here in Norrandale?”
“We are leaving tomorrow actually.”
“So soon?” I attempted not to sound disappointed.
“I’m afraid we’ve received news that my sister is unwell. We must return to Levernia immediately.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Why? Are you going to miss me?” The guests were temporarily forgotten. I could think only of his close presence.
“No.” I was surprised by his bluntness. “I meant your sister.”
“So, you won’t miss me, then?” He was teasing me now, I could tell. And I didn’t know how to respond. Had never had a boy speak to me like that.
I decided to try to focus on the party again, but I could feel his eyes lingering on me.
“You should come to Everness one day.”
“Why?” Was he suggesting that I visit him or did he simply believe himself to live in the superior kingdom?
“The library,” he said, clearing his throat. “You like reading, don’t you? The palace at Levernia has a very fine library.”
The second, then.
“Perhaps one day I will. Though I doubt my mother would allow me to leave the kingdom. Not unless she found me an Evernean husband, and even then, I think she is too much of a loyalist to do that.”
When Lance didn’t say anything, I looked back up at him. A strand of dark hair had fallen across his eyes, and before I could stop myself, I brushed it out of the way. We stared at each other for a moment, as if both having realised what I’d just done.
Then Lance lowered his head and pressed his lips to mine in a kiss. It only lasted for a moment, but I could have sworn I was no longer breathing. I didn’t know if I wanted to slap him for having the audacity or ask him to do it again.
Instead, my mouth fell open with no words coming out and I stood there like an absolute idiot.
“I’m afraid I must go, or my father will start to look for me.”
Anything. Say anything.
“I bid you goodnight, Lady Gwen.”
It was the last time I saw the Prince of Everness until I walked into the Palace of Levernia a few months ago.
By the time I’d risen the following morning, Lance and King Magnus had already departed.
I knew it was foolish of me to hope I would hear from him and yet .
. . Was it entirely deluded of me, as a young girl, to hope that he might have liked me?
But there was nothing. As the weeks passed, I came to realise that the spoiled prince did not care for me in any way. Instead, he was simply bored and looking for something to pass the time. I promised myself I would never fall victim to a prince like that again.
* * *
“What?” Lance asked, full of surprise.
“You,” I said, jabbing a finger at his chest. “Stole. My. First. Kiss.”
He took a moment to respond. “When?”
Of course, he couldn’t remember.
“When you and your father last visited Norrandale. That night at the party when you found me spying on the guests.”
“I—” He hesitated. “That was? You mean to tell me you hadn’t kissed anyone before that?”
“I was sixteen,” I reminded him. “And I wasn’t out in society. And I’d like to think myself a lady who doesn’t just go around kissing random boys.”
“So, you—” Lance pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose as if still trying to process the information. “You’re angry with me because I kissed you once, a very long time ago?”
“Yes,” I huffed. “Well, no.” I groaned in frustration, unable to believe that I was actually having this conversation with him.
“I’m angry because you made me believe that you cared for me in some way, showing me how to dance and following me around the palace all the damned time.
And then you had the audacity to kiss me without a chaperone around and leave without a word.
My reputation could have been ruined, and I never heard from you again. ”
Saying it out loud felt a little ridiculous.
Of course, my mother would have had a fit if she’d known I was kissing boys while hiding away from parties, but as no one was likely to discover us up there and I would never breathe a word of my encounters with Lance, it was unlikely my reputation would have suffered from the matter.
And yet somehow, against my will, my heart did.
I was hurt by him in a way I’d never been hurt before, even if it was over such a small thing.
“I was a kid, Gwen.” Lance tried to defend himself. “And I was probably already tipsy on wine.”
“I know,” I said abruptly. “I just thought our acquaintance mattered to you in some way, even if it was just as friends. But I know better now. I realised that you were just a selfish ass who wanted to play with my feelings to pass the time until you found another way to entertain yourself.” I made to move past him, but he took hold of my upper arms.
“That’s not fair. I didn’t even know that you wanted me to write. I thought you didn’t care.”
I didn’t want him to say anything that could possibly change the way I felt about him in that moment.
“You’re right. It was a very long time ago. And I’m glad you didn’t write. It’s for the better.”
“If that was the case then why are you still upset with me?”
I wanted this to end. I wanted to go back to my rooms and crawl under the covers and wait until I was well enough to leave this damn place and its damn prince.
“Because,” I said, pulling myself away from him. “Because it meant nothing to you. Because I meant nothing to you.”
And with that I finally walked away.