Chapter 40
Elara
I stormed to my rooms with my fists clenched.
Cai called after me but I ignored him, proceeding in a fury.
I accidentally stepped on the hem of my long skirts and nearly toppled over. Cai’s footsteps were behind me. He managed to catch up with me before I could slam my bedroom door in his face.
“Lara.” Cai’s fingers wrapped around the door, and he stepped inside.
“How could you?” I cried out.
“You did not see the state I found them in.” His knuckles were red and split. Some of it from beating up Lance just now and some of it a reminder of what he did to Thatcher.
“Was Gwen screaming for help?” I asked, pouring some water into the basin.
“What?” He frowned.
“Was Gwen in trouble? Was Lance hurting her?”
“Well, I . . .” He hesitated. I dipped a washcloth into the water and wrung it out.
“Gwen is a grown woman, Cai. And I know you view her as your little sister. But she can make her own choices.”
“Even if that choice is Lance? I won’t allow it.”
“I didn’t say it was a good choice.” I took a seat on one of the chairs in front of the fireplace, gesturing for Cai to do the same. Even if I was furious with him, I didn’t want to see him hurt.
“What’s he even doing here?” Cai reluctantly fell into the chair opposite me.
“Does it matter?” We had so much more to be worried about. I took Cai’s hand, pressing the wet cloth to his skin.
He sucked his teeth and tried to pull back, but I had a firm grip on his hand.
I noticed Cai staring at me, his expression almost that of a young boy being caught doing something he shouldn’t.
“We cannot go on like this. I cannot go on like this.”
“What do you mean?” He was trying not to flinch as I cleaned his hands.
“I mean, I can’t keep fighting with you like this. We’re supposed to be on each other’s side, now more than ever.”
He looked down at my hand holding his. “I don’t want to fight with you either.”
“Well, for starters, that means you can’t just beat up my brother, no matter how much of a selfish bastard he can be.”
“It’s not like he didn’t deserve it at least a little bit.” After everything Lance had done to Cai, he might have deserved worse. But I meant it that we couldn’t be fighting among ourselves right now.
“Fine,” I agreed with him. “Maybe a little bit.”
I carefully inspected all the fine cuts on his knuckles and where small bruises had formed.
We were both clearly thinking the same thing. Knowing what Cai had done to earn those bruises.
“You shouldn’t have been witness to that,” he said after a few moments of silence. I didn’t have to ask what he’d meant.
“Do you regret killing him?”
“I wish that it hadn’t come down to it. I wish he’d never stabbed us all in the back. I wish he’d never killed Jack or murdered my family. But he did. And no matter how I try to play it out in my head, it always ends the same. I kill Thatcher every time.”
I dropped the cloth onto one of the little side tables, but my other hand still held Cai’s.
“Just because he deserved to die doesn’t make it any easier now that he’s gone.”
“He haunts me,” Cai said, wearing a grave expression. “Every time I close my eyes, I see him in front of me, taunting me still.”
I didn’t know what words could comfort him. Cai was going to have to live with what he had done for the rest of his life. And I feared nothing would make it easier.
“Elara, I want you to know something.” He folded his other hand over mine.
“What happened in that throne room.” He looked away, as if searching for the right words.
“I don’t know how to explain it but it’s like I wasn’t myself.
Or like I wasn’t fully in control of myself.
And maybe I was just so overcome with anger and hatred but . . .”
“You think it had something to do with the dagger and that guard I killed?”
“Maybe. I feel like I don’t know anything anymore.”
“I think you might be right.” I reached into the pocket of my dress and pulled out the Myrgonite dagger.
I wasn’t the kind of person to easily admit I was wrong, but there was too much danger to be prideful now.
“Whatever kind of weapon or magic this is, we don’t understand it.
I agree with you that this should be hidden until we can find a way to destroy it.
” I handed the dagger to Cai, who inspected it in his lap.
“There was something more in the diary,” I added.
“The king found writings from the goldsmith who’d forged the objects, and he believed that the objects were linked by the magic. And therefore, they could be used to find each other.”
He pondered my words, eyes still focused on the dagger.
“So, you’re saying we can use the necklace and the dagger to find the third object?”
“Maybe. I suppose anything is worth a try at this point.”
“I think you should keep it.” Cai used his free hand to hold the dagger out to me.
“I’ll do everything I can to make sure we have an army to fight Aries, and you can put all your efforts into finding another way to destroy the objects.
I don’t think you should use either of them, even if it is to find the third one. ”
After everything we’d been through, I could not deny that the objects must have had some effect on us.
There were too many things that Cai and I could not explain.
The way that he killed Thatcher. The unnerving feeling that came over me every time I was close to either of the Myrgonite objects.
Not to mention that it was affecting the mental state of the two of us, causing tensions between us that we actively had to fight to resolve. “I promise to keep them safe.”
His thumb stroked my hand. “If anyone is capable of saving us, it’s you, Elara.”
“But what if I can’t?” I asked so softly, I wasn’t sure if Cai could hear.
I’d spent most of the past few months searching for answers and trying to find solutions.
I didn’t want to allow myself to consider the possibility of failure because I feared it would make me lose hope entirely.
But now it felt as though there was an impending doom drawing near, in the same way storm clouds do.
And I couldn’t help but worry that, despite all our efforts, we would not come out victorious.
Cai placed his hand on my cheek, forcing me to look at him. “Then I’d be happy to die by your side, if it means I get to spend the afterlife with you.”
I turned my face into his hand, pressing a kiss to his palm.
“I don’t think I’d mind spending eternity with you either.”
There were much worse fates, after all.
I looked down at the dagger in my lap again.
“You should keep this.” The metal of the hilt was cold between my fingers as I handed it back to Cai.
“I have the necklace, which I can try and use to find the third object. You were right. It would be too dangerous to have them all together. Especially if there is some kind of link. I think we need to keep them separated. I trust you’ll know where to keep this safe. ”
“I have a few places in mind.”
“Good.” I stood up from the chair, brushing invisible flecks of dust from my skirts. “Well, I should probably get to it, then.”
Cai also stood, dagger in hand. “I should follow up on news regarding our armies.”
“And while you’re at it, try not to kill my brother if you can.”
He gave me half a smile. “I can’t make any promises.
” He pressed a kiss to my temple, sparing me a last glance before leaving the room.
We’d managed to reconcile and yet I still felt unnerved.
Like there was something between us, unresolved.
A lingering force that nagged at my subconscious, except I couldn’t tell what it wanted. Only that it was not to be ignored.
* * *
The library was deathly quiet apart from the peaceful crackling of the fire and the turning of pages.
Mistwood’s library had endless rows of shelves, filled with countless books. Dust hung in the air, suggesting the library hadn’t been cleaned or used very often in the past few months. There was a large wooden table close to the fireplace where I had King Evrin’s diary laid out in front of me.
Candles decorated the rest of the table, to provide better light for reading in the dark. The sun set early in winter and there weren’t many hours in the day when one could read by sunlight.
I stood up from the table to add another few logs to the fire, suspecting that I was going to be there for a good few more hours.
The wooden chair creaked under me as I returned to my seat, forcing my eyes to focus on the diary in front of me.
I’d had little sleep in the last few days and my eyes strained with every word that I read.
But this was important. Rhen had worked through much of the diary and made lots of notes, but I had a few hours free tonight and could go through a bit of it myself.
See if I could find anything that perhaps he might have missed.
The pages of the diary were old and delicate, and I winced every time I had to turn a page, praying that I wouldn’t damage it somehow. In some parts, the ink was faded and barely readable. It took an insurmountable amount of time to make any decent progress.
At the very least we now suspected the objects were all linked to each other.
But I found myself worrying about what could happen when and if we did manage to have all three Myrgonite objects in our possession.
If they truly were as dangerous as the king said, we needed to stay as far away from them as possible.
But in doing that we also needed to keep them far away from King Aries.
I carefully turned a page. It was the start of a new entry, after the king had searched the goldsmith’s forge.
I miss her terribly some days. But then I remember the person she was in the end.
No longer the woman I had married but a monster, corrupted by the dark magic of the stones.
I’ve been going through more of the writings we’d found in the goldsmith’s forge.
Most of it is incomprehensible, scribblings and sentences that make no sense and have no order.
Perhaps the use of so much magic had caught up to the goldsmith himself, driving him mad in the end.
I used to think he’d killed himself for fear of what I might do to him once I found him.
Now I wonder if maybe he simply wasn’t able to live with himself after what he’d done.
Riona was a clever woman, and she knew I would eventually figure out that two of the stones were in her necklace and dagger.
She’d always been too fond of carrying them around, refusing to take them off for fear of being parted from her precious objects.
She knew I would try and stop her if I had all three objects, so I suspect she’s hidden the third Myrgonite stone somewhere I’ll never think to look.
It has to be in the palace somewhere. Riona could never be parted from the stones.
She’d want it somewhere she’d be able to keep an eye on it.
I found something interesting among the notes of the goldsmith.
Not only could the magic be a link between the objects, but if that is the case, the objects can be used to destroy each other.
Destroy one and you destroy them all. But the objects need to be in close range of each other to achieve this.
And then there was still the destruction it would cause if someone tried to destroy it.
I looked up from the page, eyes wide. This was something.
The objects could be used not only to find each other but also to destroy each other.
But we still didn’t have a safe way of destroying one of them, not without killing anyone, at least. I delicately turned the page to start reading the next entry.
I’d warned her that she was meddling with something which she did not understand.
But nothing was ever enough for Riona. Nothing could satisfy her endless greed.
And it cost her life. I mourn the girl who was once my wife, a very long time ago.
But she has been gone for a while now. I fear it is a stranger that I buried in the forest. I had hidden the necklace with all the other royal jewels, undetectable and not to be used for a long time, as there is no queen.
The dagger I buried in the forest with her, and I hope that time will continue to keep it hidden.
But the third object is yet to be uncovered.
It is close to me. I can feel it. It whispers to me like a voice in my head.
It calls to me in the middle of the night, urging me to retrieve the dagger and the necklace.
To use them in order to find the last Myrgonite object.
Months ago, I would have jumped at the chance.
But now, I do not think myself safe from the effects of the magic.
I want to think of myself as a virtuous man, but temptation is a strong motivator, and once I have all three objects, I might not have the strength to destroy them.
This kind of magic sows destruction. And once it has you in its clutches, you can never be free.
Destroying the objects will not come without sacrifice and I believe it would have to be the ultimate price.
As king to my people, I cannot risk it. I can only hope that if I continue to keep the objects far away from each other, the magic will fall into a slumber, and all will grow forgetful that it even existed at all.
It was a lot to take in. The king was clearly fighting an internal battle, which meant the third object had to be among his royal possessions.
But after so much time, there was no way of knowing if the object was even in the palace.
If the necklace had managed to travel from Everness into the hands of Norrandale, then the third object could be anywhere.
Whatever grasp it had on him, the king understood the danger of the objects, and not only that, but that there would be a consequence to trying to destroy the magic.
I closed the diary knowing I had to inform the others of my latest find sooner rather than later, but it wasn’t exactly the hopeful news I wanted to bring.
I knew it wouldn’t be easy. But this war and these stones had already cost everyone so much. What did we have left to sacrifice?