Chapter Four #2
He’s not happy to see you?
Why would he be? He basically ignored me for years. He’s only letting me stay because he doesn’t have a choice.
Joylyn, give him a chance to explain. He’s your dad.
Probably good advice, Joylyn thought, not that she would take it. Holly didn’t have a father, so she looked at things differently. She was always telling Joylyn to give her dad the benefit of the doubt.
A subject change seemed in order. How are things in SD?
Good. Rex is being especially sweet. I wish he wasn’t going away.
Rex was Holly’s boyfriend. They were both Marines and had been dating about a year.
Joylyn had met Holly two days after Chandler started working with her.
He hadn’t wanted his new wife to worry about his female coworker and had brought her home to dinner.
Joylyn and Holly had become friends in maybe twenty seconds.
It’s hard when they’re deployed , Joylyn typed.
You know that one, don’t you? I gotta go, but I’m thinking of you. Kisses to my favorite baby.
Joylyn smiled at that and sent back a baby and a heart emoji. As she put her cell on the desk, she noticed an old, black rotary dial phone. Despite everything, she smiled. Where on earth had her dad found one? They were practically extinct.
She’d always loved the stupid things when she’d been a kid. She’d looked for them in old diners or bowling alleys and had kept a log of where she found them.
She rested her fingers on the dial. Things had been easier back then. Simpler. She and her dad had been tight—a team in a way. No matter what, she knew he would be there for her.
Not anymore, she thought grimly.
She rose and looked around the room. It was a nice size, with a pretty four-poster bed. There was a dresser and matching nightstands. The comforter was nice, and there were lots of pillows.
She thought about lying down and taking a nap, but decided it was too late in the day. She was already having trouble sleeping at night. Better to be tired for a little longer.
She opened her tote bag and took out a little Winnie the Pooh music box.
When she and Chandler had discovered they were having a boy, they’d spent nearly a month trying to figure out the theme for their baby’s room.
Eventually they’d settled on Winnie the Pooh, done in light blue and pale yellow.
Right after that, she’d found the music box and had bought one for herself and had sent one to Chandler.
She’d brought it with her to feel more connected and because she had nowhere to put it. Once Chandler returned, they could move back into base housing, but right now she was pretty much homeless.
And stuck, she thought. Stuck where she didn’t want to be.
She rested her hand on her belly. “It’s just you and me, little one. I swear, no matter what, I will never do to you what your grandmother did to me.”
She felt the baby stir. The baby with no name, she thought, smiling. “Once you’re born we’ll name you,” she whispered. “Your dad and I have a list of names, but we want to see you first. We love you very much.”
She left the bedroom and walked into the living room. Her dad was still there, hovering by her luggage. He looked a little stunned, which almost made her feel bad. She knew she was being awful, but so what? He deserved it.
“Could you bring my bags in?” she asked, carefully avoiding looking at him.
Her dad picked them up as if they weighed nothing and started down the hall. When they were in place, on the bed, he turned back to her.
“Joylyn, what’s wrong? Why are you so mad at me? I meant what I said—I’m happy you’re here. I want us to be close again, but I don’t know what happened.”
For a second she wanted to say it didn’t matter and throw herself into his arms, the way she had when she’d been little.
But she didn’t—partly because she was still mad and partly because she didn’t know if he would catch her and hold her tight.
He’d let her go so easily before. Why should she think he cared about her now?
“What happened is you abandoned me, emotionally and physically. You went away. One day you were there and then you were gone. Wow—that’s what Mom did, too, just now. Is this part of a master plan?”
His confusion was nearly comical. “I never abandoned you. You refused to see me. You told me you didn’t want anything to do with me. I showed up week after week and you slammed the door in my face.”
“So? You’re the parent. You’re not supposed to give up. If you cared, why didn’t you make me hang out with you? Why didn’t you insist I stay with you on the weekends? You could have forced me, but you didn’t. You were happy to have your time back. You never wanted to spend time with me.”
She felt tears forming and willed them away. The ache in her back got a little worse, but she ignored that, too.
“That’s not true. I wanted our time together. That was important to me.” He stared at her. “Joylyn, you’re my daughter and I love you. I’ve always loved you.”
“Oh, please. You disappeared for weeks at a time. When you came back, you weren’t interested in me at all. Then you went away again for like a year.”
“I was working.”
“On some secret assignment. I know. As if.” The man worked for the Phoenix Police Department. What kind of “secret assignment” would have taken him out of the city? “You could have seen me if you wanted to.”
“Joylyn, I wasn’t around because of my job.”
She held up her hand. “Whatever. I don’t want to hear it. Fine. You were working, but what about later? When you were back. You didn’t want anything to do with me. You moved away, leaving Phoenix for this crappy town.”
His confusion deepened. “I continued to show up every weekend until you left for college. I tried to see you a few times in San Diego, and you were always busy. You told me to stop bugging you. Why would you care that I left Phoenix?”
She didn’t have an answer for that. Or any of it.
“If you wanted to see me, you only had to tell me,” he said quietly. “I would have been there.”
“I didn’t,” she said, pointing to the doorway. “I have to unpack and I’d like to be alone.”
He hesitated. For a second she thought maybe he was just going to grab her and hug her.
Longing swept through her. She needed a familiar Dad hug that would ease the ache in her heart and let her think everything was going to be okay.
But instead of pulling her close, he simply walked out of the room and shut the door.
The tears returned as she realized nothing had changed.
Her dad was willing to be there for her when it was easy but the second it got hard, he walked away.
***
The distance between his house and Wynn’s had never seemed so long, Garrick thought as he led the way, Joylyn trailing behind him.
He was confused, angry, hurt and a dozen other emotions he couldn’t name.
Most of the time he didn’t care that he was a typical guy with a limited vocabulary to describe his emotional life, but every decade or so he thought maybe women were smarter with their ability to understand what they were feeling.
Although given how badly things were going with his daughter, maybe ignorance was the safer path.
Since he’d delivered her luggage, she’d ignored him, keeping to her room and refusing his offers of food.
When he’d knocked on her closed door to mention dinner with Wynn and Hunter, she’d surprised him by agreeing to join him.
His first thought had been disappointment that he wasn’t going to escape her for a few hours.
That had led to guilt and other feelings he couldn’t name and here he was, walking up Wynn’s porch and hoping she could make some sense of the situation.
Wynn opened the door seconds after he knocked. Relief swept through him as he stared into her beautiful eyes.
Help me , he mouthed.
She smiled but didn’t say anything as she turned her attention to Joylyn.
“How are you feeling?” she asked. “Achy?”
Joylyn nodded. “The drive was really hard.”
“I’ll bet. Did you take a walk this afternoon? The movement might help.”
“I didn’t think about that.” Joylyn shot him a glare. “I had other stuff on my mind.”
He wanted to protest he hadn’t done anything wrong, but knew there was no point. Rather than say anything, he walked into the house and greeted Hunter.
“This is my daughter, Joylyn. Joylyn, this is Hunter.”
“Hey,” Hunter said, staring at her belly. “You’re going to have a baby. No one told me that.”
“He’s due on Christmas Day.”
Hunter’s whole face lit up. “That’s great. A Christmas baby! That happens all the time in the movies, so it’s kind of a thing. And, you know, Baby Jesus.”
Joylyn laughed. “Baby Jesus is a lot to live up to.”
Wynn touched Joylyn’s arm. “We’re going to barbecue chicken and steak. I have several salads to choose from, so you should find something that tastes good and sits well in your stomach. There’s plenty of time. Would you like to take a walk now? Just a short one? Hunter will go with you.”
Joylyn glanced at the teen. “You sure?”
Hunter nodded. “I wouldn’t want you getting lost. Plus Mom said you have brothers around my age. We’ll figure out something to talk about.”
“A walk would be nice,” she said, and they headed for the door.
When they were gone, Garrick followed Wynn into the kitchen and collapsed on one of the island stools. “You’re amazing.”
Her gaze was sympathetic. “That bad?”
“Worse. She hates me. She practically said it. She blames me for not seeing her when she was in high school. I pointed out that I showed up every week and she slammed the door in my face, but that doesn’t seem to count for anything. I called Alisha.”
Wynn got a beer out of the refrigerator and handed it to him. “What did she say?”
He took a couple of big gulps before setting down the bottle.
“She admitted she hadn’t been honest with me when she asked if Joylyn could stay with me.
” He looked at Wynn. “Apparently the problem isn’t the boys, it’s our daughter.
She’s turned into, and this is a direct quote from her mother, ‘a raving bitch with psychotic tendencies.’ Nothing makes her happy, she’s unreasonable, demanding and horrible to be around.
Alisha couldn’t stand her anymore and sent her here. ”
Wynn’s eyes widened. “That’s not happy news.”
“I agree, but what can I do about it? I can’t throw her out. Despite how she’s acting, I don’t want to get rid of her. I love her. I just wish she wasn’t so difficult.”
“I want to say Alisha should have warned you, but I’m sure she was afraid you wouldn’t agree to let Joylyn come stay.”
“Being prepared might have made a difference, but I doubt it. Right now Joylyn is mad at the world.”
And him. He supposed he should be grateful that some of her attitude wasn’t personal, but it didn’t feel that way. The great relationship they’d had before had been lost, and he still didn’t know how to get it back.
“She is dealing with a lot,” Wynn said. “She’s newly married, pregnant and her husband is deployed. That would be hard on anyone.”
“I don’t know why she didn’t stay on base in San Diego. She had friends there and support from the other Marine wives. Going back to live with her mom isolated her.”
“She’s stuck now.” Wynn’s tone was sympathetic. “And now you are, too.”
He appreciated the understanding, but before he could say anything, the front door opened.
“We’re back,” Hunter called. “We saw Jackson’s new puppy. It’s a Great Dane. She’s really big already and her feet are huge.”
Garrick glanced at his daughter and was relieved to see her eyes were bright with amusement. “They said she would be over a hundred pounds when she was grown. That’s a lot of dog.”
Hunter grinned. “That’s a lot of poop to pick up.”
Wynn sighed. “You’re never going to outgrow the bathroom humor, are you?”
“Nope.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Sorry, Mom. You should be used to it by now.”
“I keep hoping for improvement.”
“Not gonna happen. Oh, Mom! Joylyn plays Fortnite. Can we go play before dinner?”
“Sure.”
He took a step, then glanced at her. “Does this count as part of my game time for the week?”
“No. You may have a guest exception.”
Joylyn made a fist and gently hit Hunter in the upper arm. “Girls rule, boys drool.”
“It’s not because you’re a girl,” he said, leading the way back to the family room. “It’s because you’re a guest. And I don’t drool.”
“You do in your sleep.”
“Na-uh.”
Their voices faded as they entered the family room. Garrick stared after them for a couple of seconds before looking at Wynn.
“She’s transformed.”
“For the moment. I’m sure she feels better after moving around and Hunter’s good company, but I wouldn’t hold my breath thinking it will last.”
He knew she was right. “At least I know the real Joylyn is buried in there somewhere. It gives me hope.” All he had to do was figure out how to reach her. Maybe then they could talk and their relationship could be restored.
Wynn sighed. “You look optimistic.”
“I have a sunny disposition.”
She laughed. “Even if that’s true, I would remind you to be cautious. And maybe learn how to play computer games.”