Chapter 19
Sebastian
Ara’s mouth was on mine and it took my mind longer than it should have to realize that. My hands were quicker to respond and they went up to her hips and then slowly wrapped around her. This was what I had wanted, dreamed about, and yet having her, holding her, feeling her need as she stood next to me, almost didn’t feel real. I had thought countless times what it would be like to have her in my arms again, and it still wasn’t as spectacular as the real thing.
Ara’s mouth opened with a moan and my body came alive with the sound. My hands gripped her body tightly as I dove my tongue inside her mouth. Her tongue was like silk and she tasted like the pizza we had just eaten. The smell, taste, and even sound of her brought me back to our youth. This was the woman I had loved my entire life, the one who knew me better than the rest. It quickly made all other thoughts but touching, kissing, and pleasing her leave my body.
Our conversation had been heated, necessarily, but filled with anger and passion. I wanted Ara, had wanted her forever, but I didn’t want her to feel guilty about being with me or have any remorse. I wanted her, all of her, but only if she was truly willing.
“Ara,” I said with a sigh and moved my mouth from hers and placed my forehead on top of hers. I felt like my mind and body were fighting each other and I wasn’t sure if my mind would win.
“Bash,” Ara moaned.
Her voice told me what I needed to hear and I longed to move back to her, but I had to hear her say it. I took a deep breath. “Are you sure?” I asked.
Ara’s voice turned to anger and concern when she asked, “Aren’t you?”
“I want you. I have always wanted you. I will die wanting you, but I need to know you do too. This, you, it means too much. This can’t be in anger, or to prove something. I— ”
Ara brought her mouth back to mine. It was inches from my mouth when she said, “You idiot. I kissed you. I want you. Take me. Now,” she demanded.
At the sound of her words, a dam broke in me. I brought my mouth to hers again. I kissed her greedily; my hands tightened around her and I lifted her in my arms. Our tongues moved together as I turned us around and placed her by the bed. Her hands went around my back and down to my ass, giving it a tight squeeze. I jerked toward her and she let out a muffled cry when she felt my erection between her legs.
I wanted nothing more than to tear her clothes off, throw her on the bed, and dive deep inside her. But I had imagined this for too long and Ara deserved more than that. I wanted to take things slow; I wanted to show her just how much she means to me. This, tonight, us, was just beginning.
Reluctantly, I moved my mouth from hers and took a small step back. Ara leaned toward me and then slowly opened her eyes. She gave me a questioning look as I stared at her. She was beautiful, she always had been to me, and I took a moment to just look at her. Her long red hair cascaded down her back, her green eyes were dark with desire, her lips were swollen from my kisses, and her cheeks were flushed. I couldn’t believe that this woman was going to be in my bed. My heart swelled as I thought about all the other things we were going to do together.
My eyes didn’t leave hers as I slowly lifted her shirt up and over her head. Ara let me, seeming to know without me telling her what I wanted. I let the shirt fall to the floor and feasted my eyes on her.
I could see the nervousness in her stance but also her strength. She might have felt self-conscious standing there half-dressed but she looked magnificent to me. I held her gaze as I lifted my hands to her breasts and cupped them over her bra. They were soft, yet firm, and my breath caught at touching them again. They were the same as I remembered and yet different. They, like the woman standing in front of me, had grown, changed, and matured since we were together last.
Ara closed her eyes and bit on her lower lip. She tilted her head back and my body tightened at the look of enjoyment and restraint she was showing. It wasn’t enough to just touch her like that. I needed more. I needed all of her. I reached behind her back and unclasped her bra, letting it fall to the floor. I didn’t watch it go, all I could see, all I cared about was the magnificent woman in front of me.
My eyes roamed over her breasts, marveling at how round, full, and perky they were. Ara dropped her head down and looked at me. The look told me how much she wanted me and any reservations I had disappeared. I put my hands on her stomach and slowly moved them up towards her breasts. Her breathing became shallower the closer I got.
She let out a soft whimper when my thumbs ran over her nipples. They immediately went to rock-hard peaks and I squeezed and massaged them. Her hands tightened at her side, yet still she made no move to touch me. She was letting me do as I wanted and I loved her more for it.
It was too much being this close, touching her the way I was and not kissing her. I moved closer to her and pressed my mouth against hers. She smiled into my mouth as she kissed me. My tongue dove inside hers as she wrapped her arms around me. I pressed up against her as the kiss intensified. Her hands went to my jeans. I cried out in her mouth as she unbuckled them. My body strained at the thought of her touching me. I teased her breasts as she made quick work of pushing my pants and boxer briefs to the ground. I stepped out of them as Ara reached down and took me in her hands.
“Ara,” I moaned as I worked my mouth over to her ear and sucked on it.
“Bash,” she moaned back and tugged on me harder.
Her hands, her tongue, her moans, her body all felt wonderful. I knew if I didn’t change positions, I was going to lose it and I didn’t want that for us. I wanted to draw out the night, our time together, as long as I could.
I moved my hands from her breasts to her pants, sliding them down her legs. As they went, I moved with them, dropping my mouth down to her breasts, kissing first the right and then the left nipple. I sucked on each in turn and it made Ara squirm. Her hands dug into my hair as I gently put her down on the bed. She went willingly and when I kissed my way between her legs, she dropped her head down and sighed.
“Bash,” she moaned.
I wasn’t sure if it was in surrender, concern, or need. All I knew was that I wanted to taste her; I wanted to watch her as she came apart, and wanted her to cry out my name when she did. I lifted my head and gazed at her lying on my bed, naked, vulnerable but so very strong. I had never met a woman like her and I knew I never would. She had captured me, mind, body, and soul. She had no clue the hold she had over me and how much I would do for her.
“So incredible. So strong. So beautiful,” I said hoarsely.
Her eyes were closed and if it weren’t for the quickness of her breath and pulse, I would have thought she was asleep or just relaxing. Her hands had bunched up the sheet she was lying on top of. I could see and feel how aroused she was. I wanted to give her everything, I wanted to show her pleasure like she had never known.
I knelt on the edge of the bed and slid my hands under her ass. She lifted her hips up to let me and then settled back down. I kissed her stomach and moved to her legs and then the inside of her thighs. She jerked and sighed with each kiss and I could see how much she wanted this. Still, I took my time; I had all night, I had the rest of our lives.
As I moved between her legs, she opened her legs wider for me. I could smell her arousal and see her juices glistening in her opening. Her hips jerked slightly as if she was just waiting for me to taste her. I was going to give her everything she wanted, starting with my tongue.
Her body jerked and she cried out when I flicked my tongue inside her. Each kiss, each sigh, was better than the last. I moaned my own pleasure. She tasted so good and her response was so perfect, I did it again and again and again. I lapped up her juices. I loved her response and how incredible she was. I could have stayed between her legs all night, listening to her moans, teasing her and myself as I drew out her pleasure. I had never had a woman who was as responsive as she was. My whole body was on fire with need for her.
As if she could sense how much I wanted her, she tugged on my hair and moved me away from her. I looked at her as she sat up, wrapped her arms around me, and pulled me to the bed with her. I went willingly, thinking she needed a moment. It had been pretty intense and I wouldn’t have blamed her if she needed a break.
“Are you okay?” I asked, breathlessly.
Her response was to lift my shirt over my head and then bring my mouth to hers. Her tongue pushed against my mouth, demanding entrance. My arms went around her as I kissed her. Her hands slide down my stomach and between my legs. It was my turn to moan when she stroked me.
Ara broke the kiss as she whispered in my ear, “No. I’m not okay. I won’t be okay until we’re one.”
As if to prove her point, she tugged me on top of her and guided me between her legs. I brushed up against her opening and I sighed into her neck. “Ara,” I moaned.
“Yes. Take me,” she sighed.
Her words were all the invitation I needed. I was rock-hard and desperate to be inside her. I sighed and did as she asked. I lifted my body up slightly so I could enter her. In the back of my mind, I worried that we didn’t have protection, but I was clean, and I wouldn’t mind if our lovemaking resulted in a pregnancy.
Ara wrapped her legs around me, her hips moved under me, as she lightly touched my erection. I dropped my mouth to her as I nestled between her legs, teasing us both. Our tongues danced as I moved myself inside her, slowly. I was a big man and I wanted her to get used to my girth. She sighed and arched her back up toward me, her body opening to accept me. Her legs tightened around me as if she was afraid I was going to move away.
I wanted to tell her I couldn’t leave her. I would never leave her. She was all I wanted, all I needed in life. I had wanted this, her, for as long as I could remember. As long as she would have me, I was never going to let her go.
She felt so good; she was so wet, her cries and moans the perfect soundtrack to what I was feeling. I slid right inside. She cried out as I did, arched her back, and moved with me. She felt perfect; she was perfect. I moved my hands to her hips as I drove myself deeper and deeper inside her, going faster and faster with each thrust. She matched each of my thrust with her own. Soft sounds of excitement and need came out of her mouth and turned me on. Soon, we were frantic as I moved in and out of her and she gyrated underneath me. Her legs tightened around me and I could tell she was so close to coming.
“Yes, Ara,” I moaned.
“Bash. Oh Bash! Don’t stop” she cried.
I kissed her again as she started to go over, passionately, deeply. In that kiss, in that moment I wanted her to know how much she mattered and how much what we were doing mattered to me. I might have been a fool to let her go once, but I was never, ever going to do that again.
She cried out into my mouth as she came and tightened her body around me. At the feeling of her going over, it was all too much and I fell as well. I tightened my hold on her as I did. I cried out into her mouth and could feel tears forming in my eyes. It was everything I had hoped for and more. I felt as if our bodies had become one and I never wanted to let the feeling or her go.
Spent, I dropped down next to her. I shifted my weight so I wasn’t crushing her. Ara rolled with me and put her head on my shoulder. I kept my arms around her as I put my head on top of hers. I could feel her heartbeat slowly returning to normal, as did mine. I wanted to say something to her. I wanted to tell her how amazing that had been, how much it had meant to me but I couldn’t find the words. Instead, I just ran my hand lazily up and down her arm as she slowly fell asleep. With a smile on my face, I closed my eyes and followed her into oblivion.