Chapter Four #2
Rick shifted forward slightly. “Do you want me to move so you can have the table to yourself?”
Allen blinked. “No.”
Rick’s eyebrows lifted. “No?”
Allen swallowed, then shrugged. “I mean… you don’t have to. You’re already here.”
Rick watched him for a second, then nodded. “Okay.”
They sat in silence again for a moment, but it wasn’t an empty silence. It felt loaded, as if something was there between them that Allen couldn’t put a name to.
Rick spoke again. “So, you’re twenty-two.”
Allen blinked. “How do you know that?”
Rick’s mouth twitched. “Lucky guess.”
Allen narrowed his eyes. No way was that a lucky guess. “That’s not a lucky guess.”
Rick smiled, and there was something smug in it this time. “You said you were in school when the song came out. You don’t look thirty.”
Allen stared at him, then laughed despite himself. “Alright.”
“How old do you think I am?” Rick leaned back again.
Allen hesitated to answer, so he shrugged. “I don’t know.”
Rick’s eyes stayed steady. “Go on. Guess.”
“Older than me.”
Rick gave him a look. “That’s a safe answer.”
Allen exhaled through his nose. “Thirty-five?”
“Close.” Rick’s smile shifted.
Allen’s stomach flipped. “Forty?”
Rick nodded once. “Yeah.”
Allen stared at him. Forty wasn’t old. Not really. But it was older than Allen expected when he’d looked at him from across the room. Rick didn’t seem bothered by the age-gap. He just said it like it was a fact.
Rick tapped his fingers lightly against the edge of the table. “Does that bother you?”
Allen blinked. “What?”
Rick’s gaze held his. “The age.”
Allen’s mouth went dry. He hadn’t said anything or reacted in any way, but Rick had noticed. Allen shook his head. “No. I just… didn’t expect it.”
Rick nodded. He looked down at his hands for a second, then back up. “Most people don’t.”
Allen didn’t ask what he meant, but he wanted to. “So why are you here?” Then immediately regretted it because it sounded like he was accusing him. “I mean. In this café. Not—”
Rick didn’t seem offended. “I needed to get out. It’s been a long week.”
Allen’s throat tightened again. He didn’t know why he kept reacting to Rick like this. He took another sip of chai, which was thankfully cooler this time. “I understand that.”
Rick watched him. “Do you always drink that?”
Allen lifted a shoulder. “Yeah.”
“I can see it.”
Allen frowned. “What does that mean?”
Rick’s mouth twitched. “It’s sweet. Comforting.”
Allen stared at him. Rick’s comments felt weirdly intimate, and his face heated up in response. “It’s nice,” he murmured.
Rick looked away and cleared his throat, then asked, “What do you do when you’re not dealing with angry customers?”
Allen shrugged. “Not much. I go out sometimes and see friends or watch stuff and I like to cook.”
Rick nodded slowly. “You sound bored.”
Allen’s eyes flicked up, and he furrowed his brow. “I’m not bored.”
Rick’s gaze held his. “You are.”
Allen opened his mouth, then shut it again because Rick was right. Allen didn’t know why that annoyed him, but it did. It also made him feel seen, and he couldn’t explain why.
He put his cup down. “What do you do?”
Rick’s mouth tightened slightly again. “Depends. I write. Sometimes I go to the gym. Sometimes I… try to work out what the hell I’m doing.”
Allen stared at him. The honesty caught him off guard, and he found himself saying, “That’s relatable.”
Rick’s eyes met his and held for a second longer than normal. “Yeah?”
Allen nodded, and it felt as if something passed between them. Rick broke eye contact first. He shifted his phone slightly on the table, then left it face down again. Allen noticed Rick’s hands. Strong, with veins faint beneath the skin. Large enough to pull or tug…
Rick caught him looking but didn’t comment. “Do you have a boyfriend?”
Allen blinked. The question was blunt and direct, but Allen didn’t think it was rude. “No,” Allen said, and tried to keep it casual. “Do you?”
Rick’s mouth twitched. “No.”
Allen waited for more, but Rick didn’t add anything else. Allen swallowed. “You… date?”
Rick shrugged. “Sometimes.”
Allen didn’t know what to ask without sounding like he was fishing, so he went with the safest thing. “Do you like being single?”
Rick’s eyes held his, and something in Allen’s stomach tightened. “No,” Rick said simply. “Do you?”
Allen’s throat went tight, and he shook his head. “No.”
Rick nodded. Silence fell between them, and it should have felt awkward, but it didn’t. Rick glanced toward the door, then back at Allen. “So, your friends aren’t coming.”
Allen made a face. “No.”
Rick nodded. “You could leave.”
“I know.”
Rick’s mouth twitched, and his eyes warmed slightly. “You’re not leaving.”
Allen stared at him, then whispered, “No.”
Rick leaned back in his chair. “Okay.”
Allen felt his pulse pick up, and he forced himself to breathe. This was ridiculous. He barely knew Rick. He’d seen him on a screen years ago and that was it. He shouldn’t be sitting here like this, feeling as if a table in a café was suddenly the most important place in the world and yet…
Rick’s gaze dropped to Allen’s hands around his cup. “Your hands are shaking.”
Allen blinked and looked down. They weren’t shaking. Well, not much. He tightened his grip and forced them to stop. “They’re not.”
Rick’s mouth twitched. “They were.”
Allen swallowed and met Rick’s eyes. “Maybe I’m cold.”
Rick nodded and didn’t call Allen out on an obvious lie, which kind of made it feel worse to Allen. He took a breath, then said the thing that had been sitting in his head since Rick sat down. “Why did you ask to sit with me?”
Rick’s eyes met his. “Because you looked like you didn’t want to be alone.”
Allen’s stomach flipped hard, and he stared at Rick. “That’s a weird thing to say.”
Rick nodded. “Yeah, it is.”
Allen’s throat tightened. “And you? You didn’t want to be alone either?”
Rick held his gaze. “No.”
Allen stared at him for a minute, then looked away first because he couldn’t handle the intensity. He took a sip of chai to give himself something to do, and when he put it down again, he said quietly, “Okay.”
Rick’s eyes stayed on him. “Okay?” Rick glanced toward the counter. “Do you want anything to eat?”
Allen blinked. “No, I’m fine.”
Rick tilted his head. “You’re hungry.”
Allen furrowed his brow and stared at Rick. “How do you know that?”
“Lucky guess.”
Allen stared at him, then let out a quiet laugh. “You’re annoying.”
Rick’s smile widened. “I’ve been told.”
Allen should’ve ended it there. He should’ve finished his drink, said it was nice to meet you, and gone home, but instead he said, “I’m not hungry.”
Rick held his gaze, then he nodded slowly. “Alright.” When Rick stood, Allen said nothing. He watched him walk to the counter and order something. When Rick came back, he put a plate between them, and Allen looked and saw a slice of cake.
Allen stared at it. “I didn’t ask for that.”
Rick sat down. “I know.”
Allen’s chest tightened. “Why?”
“Because you looked as if you needed it.”
Allen stared at him, and his throat tightened. He looked down at the cake instead, then he picked up the fork. “Fine,” Allen muttered.
Rick’s mouth twitched. “Good.”
Allen took a bite and glanced up and caught Rick watching him. Allen swallowed. “What?”
Rick shook his head. “Nothing.”
Allen narrowed his eyes. “You’re looking at me.”
Rick’s gaze stayed steady. “Yeah.”
Allen’s pulse kicked again. He set the fork down because his hands weren’t steady now. “This is stupid,” Allen said quietly.
Rick’s eyes didn’t leave his. “Is it?”
Allen swallowed. “I don’t know you.”
Rick nodded once. “No.”
Allen’s throat tightened. “And you don’t know me.”
Rick’s mouth twitched again. “Not yet.”
Allen stared at him. Not yet. Allen looked down at his phone, partly to break the moment and partly to get himself under control. When he looked back up, Rick was still there. Still watching him as if he’d decided something.
Allen took a slow breath and made himself say it. “Do you want my number?”
Rick didn’t hesitate. “Yeah.”
Allen’s heart kicked so hard he gasped softly.
Picking up his phone, he unlocked it and slid it across the table.
Rick took it, typed quickly, then slid it back.
Allen looked down and saw that a new contact had been added.
His mouth went dry again, and he blinked before picking his phone up and sending a message that only said hi.
Rick’s voice cut in. “If you don’t want me to use it, say now.”
Allen blinked and looked up. “I want you to.”
Rick’s gaze held his, then he nodded. Allen picked up his fork again and took another bite of cake because he didn’t know what else to do and he didn’t know how to react. This never happened to him.
Rick watched him for a second, then looked away, but the strange chemistry building between them didn’t disappear and Allen didn’t know what to do about it, or even if he should do something about it.
But as he sat there across from Rick in a busy café, eating cake he hadn’t ordered, with Rick’s number now in his phone, Allen felt something he hadn’t felt in a long time. Hope.