Chapter 22
NEW YEAR’S EVE
‘What are you two huddled up about?’ asked Peg coming down the stairs. ‘You’re thick as thieves, the pair of you.’
She had meant it as a joke, but Mim’s sudden start was a guilty one for sure.
‘I don’t think I should tell you,’ replied Henry. ‘You already think I’m mad, and this will only cement that opinion.’
‘Want to try me?’ she said, smiling benignly, although in truth she was intrigued. This wasn’t the first time she had come across Henry and Mim having a whispered conversation.
Henry shot Mim a look before raising his hands in a gesture of submission.
‘If you must know, Blanche is picking us up shortly,’ said Mim, butting in. ‘I’m going for a gossip and Henry is going to look at Athelstone House.’
Peg frowned. ‘The place where she lives?’
‘One and the same.’
Peg turned her attention back to Henry. ‘So when you say look at… I’m guessing this is not a trip to study its architectural features, or muse on its history.
’ She suppressed a smile. ‘Not being funny, Henry, but aren’t you a little young for all that?
I know you’re worried about your health, but this is only a temporary setback, I’m sure of it. ’
‘They cater for people over fifty-five,’ said Mim. ‘Even you could go there, Peg.’ Mim’s tongue was firmly in her cheek.
Peg was about to say ‘over my dead body’ when she thought better of it. ‘Thank you, Mim, but I’m not sure I’m ready for that quite yet.’
‘No, it’s not my cup of tea either,’ said Mim. I mean, it’s very nice – Blanche’s flat is lovely, but…’ She shuddered. ‘Talk about one foot in the grave. All those old people.’
Peg smiled, wondering whether Mim had ever said anything to that effect to Blanche. She could easily imagine the response if she had.
‘Yes, thank you,’ muttered Henry. ‘And you’re absolutely right, I am too young for the type of accommodation Blanche has, but the main house is set in several acres of parkland, and within its boundaries are also several bungalows and chalets.
There’s a health club there, too. And although they are for people of early retirement age, it’s the setting that appeals.
It’s very private and, well, altogether rather lovely… ’
Peg nodded. ‘Yes, I’ve seen it advertised,’ she said. ‘But you haven’t even been out of the house yet, Henry. Are you sure a visit like that isn’t going to be too much?’
He raised his eyebrows. ‘Point proven, I think.’
‘Yes, but it’s not, is it? The way you feel now isn’t going to be the way you feel in a couple of months’ time, maybe even a couple of weeks.’
Peg didn’t really know why she was trying to put obstacles in his way – perhaps it was simply that she was surprised by his decision – and although she’d promised Adam she would keep a careful watch on Henry, she wasn’t his keeper, he could actually do what he liked.
She had sounded a note of caution anyway; it was up to Henry what he did now.
‘True…’ Henry smiled. ‘But it doesn’t hurt to look. And I’ve probably made it sound more formal than it is. I don’t even know whether there are any properties for sale. So, in truth, what we’ll be doing is having a cuppa with Blanche, and I promise I won’t overtax myself.’
‘Adam would never forgive me if you did.’
‘No, I know.’ Henry’s expression was warm. He was obviously grateful for her concern, even if he didn’t say it.
‘Will you be back in time for lunch?’
Henry exchanged a look with Mim. ‘Possibly not… Perhaps it would be better to assume we won’t be.’
‘Okay,’ said Peg lightly. ‘I’m just popping into the garden to get some of the leaves up. The lawn is clogged with them and it would be good to let it breathe a little, it’s such a lovely day. Let me know when you’re going.’
She walked straight through to the kitchen and quickly shrugged on her welly boots and coat. The conversation had disturbed her, and she needed some time alone to get a grip on her thoughts. For heaven’s sake, she’d thought her hormonal days were long behind her.
Raking the leaves was one of those jobs which, on the one hand, was irritating because it seemed never-ending during several months of the year, but on the other, one she was grateful for at times like this.
Times when the physical exercise was just the thing to help her vent her frustrations.
There were plenty of occasions when Julian had driven her out here and…
She turned the thought away. She’d gone over and over all that in her head countless times, and she was done with it.
Nothing she did, or didn’t do, would have changed the outcome, that much was abundantly clear.
She hadn’t even got the first load of leaves corralled into a pile when she saw a shadow stretching out across the lawn, bobbing up and down as its owner walked. She turned around to see Henry coming down the path towards her.
‘It’s lovely out here,’ he remarked. ‘But crikey, is it cold.’
She smiled. ‘Hence the leaf raking. It certainly keeps you warm. At least you’ve had the good sense to put on a coat.
’ She dropped her head. ‘Sorry, I’m fussing.
It’s what I do.’ She was well aware that she wasn’t just referring to her last statement.
‘And probably made worse by having Mim live so far away that when I do get to see her, or something untoward happens like a broken wrist, I go into smothering mode. It’s become something of a habit. ’
Henry squinted against the sun. ‘I don’t see concern as smothering.
And, actually, it’s nice to have someone show it at all, I’ve lived a long time without it.
Plus, you were right to temper my enthusiasms, it is early days and I do need to learn to walk before I can run.
’ He pulled a face. ‘So I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to be defensive. ’
‘Even if you had been, I wouldn’t blame you.’
Henry smiled, looking around. ‘This is quite some space you’ve got here. The garden is beautiful. You must put in a lot of hours to keep it looking this good.’
‘I do.’ Peg nodded. ‘It’s something I very much enjoy but…
it’s been my saviour, too. I feel different when I’m out here.
’ She dipped her head. ‘The dust of snow from a hemlock tree, has given my heart a change of mood, and saved some part of a day I had rued. So you see why I’ve always loved that poem.
What you did… I didn’t get a chance to say much about it the other day.
You were asleep, and then Mim arrived home and there was dinner to make, and…
it got a bit lost in all of that, but it was beautiful, truly beautiful.
And a beautiful thing to do.’ The sun was turning the grey strands in Henry’s hair into silver threads.
‘If I’d got my act together I’d have written some words of my own, but…’ He tapped his head gently. ‘The old bonce isn’t quite what it was just yet. And besides, Robert said it far better than I could.’
Peg smiled at his deflection of her compliment. ‘I didn’t know you wrote poetry.’
‘I don’t. Or rather, I haven’t, not for a long while. But I’m hoping it’s something I might find my way back into. Now that I’m going to have a lot more time on my hands.’
‘Have you heard back from your dean?’ she asked. ‘Will they let you go, do you think?’
‘I don’t see that they have any choice, but yes, I’m to go with their blessing, which means a lot. The dean is a very articulate man, so it’s no surprise that his reply to my email was everything I could have hoped for but, even so, he didn’t have to write it that way.’
‘No, I’m sure.’
‘There are some administrative procedures to put into place, but I shall officially retire at Easter. I’m on sick leave until then anyway, so the reality is that I have given my last lecture.’
Peg hoped her expression was sympathetic. ‘That must be hard.’
Henry thought for a moment. ‘You know, I thought it would be. But surprisingly, it doesn’t seem to feel that way. I’m taking that to mean the timing is right.’
‘Things happen for a reason. Isn’t that what they say?’
‘It’s something I’ve always believed in, certainly.’ Henry was studying her face. ‘And recent events have definitely given me a great deal to think about.’ He smiled. ‘How about you? Are you a mistress of fate? Or a proponent of free will?’
Peg glanced away. The conversation was edging into territory she was keen to avoid. ‘The latter,’ she said, looking down at the pile of leaves at her feet. ‘We make our own fortune. Which brings me neatly around to what we were discussing earlier. Are you really thinking of moving?’
Henry ran a hand through his hair, frowning when he encountered the dressing that was still there.
‘I don’t know what I’m doing, not really.
But I guess I’m exploring all the possibilities,’ he said.
‘I’m not used to having all this time on my hands for thinking about stuff, and one topic which is sorely in need of it is my relationship with Adam.
It hasn’t been good for a while, and there’s nothing like looking death square in the face to make you consider what’s important in your life.
I don’t want to go through whatever time I have left being alienated from my son, or from Sofia, for that matter.
He told me some things the other day and…
’ He broke off and stared into the distance for a moment, as if thinking.
‘Anyway, one of the things he said is that I know nothing about their lives, and he’s right.
The truth hurts, but I can see that I’ve used the rift in our relationship as an excuse to further withdraw from it, when what I should have done is the opposite.
I need to be a much bigger part of their lives going forward, and it’s going to be an awful lot easier if I’m based here, rather than nearly three hours away. ’