Chapter 28
Freya arrived at Exposure ready to explode. On the drive in, all she could think about was Jonny and his potential involvement in this ugly business. Despite his pledge of support for the Every Day project, everything else in Freya’s life had gone downhill since he’d reappeared on the scene. As much as she wanted her new-found knowledge regarding their relationship to be erased from her memory banks, she now also wanted to know why he despised her so much and why he seemed to have turned into a carbon copy of their father.
‘Morning, Sasha,’ she greeted as she entered the reception area. She marched towards her office, barely giving her assistant a second glance.
‘Oh, Freya, this is a surprise. I wasn’t really expecting you in today. Wow! Your hair,’ Sasha remarked, hurrying from behind the desk to follow Freya into her room.
‘Weren’t expecting me? Don’t I have Miss Guide at eleven and Toby James at four?’ Freya asked, looking down at her diary on her desk.
‘Well, yes. But I wasn’t sure, what with everything that’s been going on, whether you’d feel up to working.’
‘I feel fine. In fact, I feel better than ever. I mean, who wouldn’t feel on top of the world when they have a gorgeous fiancé to marry in the next few weeks?’ She smiled.
‘I guess nobody.’
‘Right, so, have you got my messages?’
‘Um, yes. I’ll just get them.’ Sasha left Freya’s office and headed back to the reception.
Freya began leafing through papers on her desk, looking for a Post-It note she knew she’d kept. She really needed to sort out the items on her desk. It was chaos and there was probably food under the files somewhere.
‘Here you are. There are quite a few. I marked the ones I called back.’ She passed Freya the message pad.
‘Thanks, Sasha.’ She took the book.
‘So is everything OK at the house now? No more break ins or anything?’ Sasha questioned.
‘No, no everything’s fine. In fact, everything’s more than fine.’ She couldn’t keep the smile from her face. Despite everything else that was going on, the baby news was wonderful. She might have reservations about her capabilities but she was excited. It was unexpected but not unwelcome.
‘Really? You sound like you have some sort of news.’
‘Well, actually I do. But it’s completely confidential.’
She didn’t want to share this news with the world. She’d hardly had time to take it all in herself yet.
She wasn’t ready to react to the world’s reaction.
‘That goes without saying.’
‘Well, Nick and I… we’re going to have a baby. Isn’t that just the most exciting and terrifying news you’ve ever heard?’
‘Wow. I mean, that’s fantastic news, really great,’ Sasha replied, smiling broadly.
‘Yes it is, isn’t it? I mean, I wasn’t sure at first but Nick is so excited. And I think he’s going to be a wonderful father.’ She recalled his expression when he saw the image on the scan monitor the night before.
‘I’m sure he will be amazing.’
‘The only downside to the pregnancy is I seem to have totally gone off all the foods I used to crave. For example, the thought of eating leftover Chinese for breakfast makes me feel quite sick.’
‘I’m sure it will pass.’
‘I hope so. Because I can’t see the baby getting all it needs from Jell-O sandwiches.’
‘Would you like me to get you something from the patisserie?’
‘No thanks. But a cup of tea would be great.’
‘I’ll go and make one.’
Miss Guide was one of the largest lingerie companies in the US and Freya knew her intimate photos of Nicholas were the reason she’d been asked to shoot for them. Although scantily clad women were not her subject of choice, the job paid extremely well and Freya had also been able to suggest the company thought about making a range for the larger woman. They had taken this on board and Freya had agreed to endorse the product. She’d devoted the morning to looking at designs and trying on some prototypes. In between changes of underwear, she’d telephoned Jonathan. She’d got through to his voicemail and had left a message for him to meet her at Gatebrook.
It was just after one when Freya arrived and Jonathan was already there. He was stood, leant against the bonnet of his car, a pair of sunglasses in his hand. He looked more composed than the evening before. He was wearing a fresh suit and everything about him was immaculate and restored.
Freya pulled up in front of his car. Her stomach was churning. She didn’t really know what to say to him. Taking a deep breath, she got out and shut the door firmly behind her.
‘Got your car back then,’ she remarked. She walked towards him.
‘Yeah, I went to the hospital last night but they said you’d already gone and I didn’t want to call the house. I guessed, as you’d left, it meant things must be alright.’
‘Things aren’t alright, Jonny. Things are far from alright.’ She threw the wreath at him. It landed on the bonnet of his car. Some of the flowers detached and fell to the ground.
‘What is this?’ he asked, looking at it.
‘Oscar worthy! Come on, keep it up. Show me some real surprise and outrage. Nick says it’s all in the stance. So, come on, Jonny, give me a stance.’
‘Who sent you this?’ he asked, moving his gaze from the flowers to Freya.
‘Fantastic! Great line and perfectly timed. I wish I was recording this. Perhaps Nick could swing a part for you.’
‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. Am I supposed to know what this is?’ Jonathan questioned.
‘The camera would love you. Hold on, I have Donald in my bag somewhere. Let me get some stills.’ She dug into her handbag and looked for her camera.
‘Freya, stop it. I don’t know anything about this. Where did it come from? Was it sent to you? Have you informed the police? Stuff like this is serious intimidation.’
‘It was tied to my front gate this morning for everyone to see, including some of the press. Well, one of the press. Apparently, we’re not as hot as George Clooney today.’ She couldn’t find the camera.
‘And you think I had something to do with it? Why?’
‘Now let me think! When did I start getting hate mail? Hmm, just after you reappeared. When did my beautiful house start getting broken into? Hmm, just after I met up with you again. When did our driver get attacked? Oh, let me fill in the blanks for you! When I started seeing you again!’ she ranted.
‘For God’s sake, Freya. Why would I be doing this to you? I care about you.’
‘Oh no. Don’t you say that. Don’t you say you care about me! If you cared about me, you would not have told me what you told me. You would not have got in touch with me again to tell me that…’
‘To tell you I’m your brother?’
‘Stop it. Don’t say that. I don’t want to hear it.’ She clamped her hands over her ears. The words still sickened her.
‘You have to hear it. Take your hands away and bloody listen to me,’ he ordered. He wrenched her hands away from her head.
‘Let go of me! Don’t you touch me! You make me feel sick.’ Her heart was racing and she was starting to feel woozy.
‘And how do you think I’ve felt about it since I found out? I’ve had to carry this around with me every day since I was seventeen. Our father bought my family’s silence and we never spoke about it again. There were so many times I wanted to get in touch with you, to try and make sense of it all, but I couldn’t cross him.’
‘You couldn’t cross him because he was dipping into his pockets and providing you with everything you needed to become a cardboard cut-out of him.’
‘What was I supposed to do? You know what my life was like on that council estate. I had no prospects. My future would either have been working my guts out in a factory like my father or pedalling amphetamines.’
‘It didn’t have to be that way. And there’s nothing wrong with working hard for a living.’
‘No, I agree, but struggling? Struggling to survive like my parents did for so many years? Letting my mother carry on selling herself just to put food on the table? Listening to her cry at night? Eric offered us all a lifeline and I’m sorry if that grates on you, but we took it.’
‘He bought you. Just like he buys everything in his life. You’re just another one of his possessions and he will use you and manipulate you forever.’
‘I don’t think he will.’
‘Believe me, I’m speaking from vast experience.’
‘This is going to sound really hard to believe, but… he cares about me.’
‘Oh my God! You’re kidding me, right? You think he cares about you! I didn’t realise you were so na?ve. The only person Eric Lawson-Peck cares about is himself and the only other thing he cares about is his fortune.’
‘He’s aging, Freya. He’s nearly sixty years old and I think he’s taking some time to reflect on things.’
‘I can’t stand here and listen to this crap. My father will never change. He’s always been a piece of work and being eligible for his bus pass is not going to alter that.’ She turned away from him and made her way back to the car.
‘He’s left me everything in his will.’
‘Oh my! He’s not left it to me? How shocked and surprised I am. How hurt and insulted. I’m pleased for you, Jonny. It sounds like you completely deserve it, having been so close to the man for all these years.’
‘The money doesn’t interest me. In ten or so years’ time, I plan to be worth twice as much as him.’
‘Bravo.’ She opened the door of her car.
‘I want you to have the money. As soon as I inherit, I’m gifting it to you.’
‘I can’t be bought; you know that. I’ve no interest in the money either but for much better reasons than you. Like the fact taking anything from you or that man would be like selling my soul to the Devil.’
‘Are you saying the Every Day project or the Nicholas Kaden Foundation could do without a few billion dollars?’
‘It’s dirty money, Jonny. Anything my father’s associated himself with is soiled and that includes you.’ Her eyes flashed at him, shooting anger across the yards.
‘I never stopped loving you, Freya.’
‘Don’t you understand how that sounds? Whatever we felt for each other back then was wrong and disgusting. I have memories in my head that keep replaying and I don’t ever want to see them again.’
‘We did nothing wrong. We didn’t know.’
‘That doesn’t make it alright. God, what sort of freak am I? My mother sleeps with my boyfriend and now I’ve slept with my half-brother. Any more and they could probably dedicate a whole episode of Jerry Springer to me.’
‘So, where do we go from here?’
‘Where do we go from here? Well, I suggest you go that way and I’ll go in the opposite direction. You didn’t expect us to get together and all be one big happy family, did you?’
‘I didn’t expect anything, but would that be such a bad thing?’
‘You’re serious, aren’t you? You think you and I and our father can put our differences aside and let bygones be bygones! Jonny, you’re completely insane. I can hardly bear to look at you.’
‘I never had any siblings growing up.’
‘Well, go back to Daddy. Ask him how many other prostitutes he slept with. There might be a whole new multi-cultural family waiting out there for you. We might even have to expand Friends Reunited to fit us all on there.’
‘Can you blame me for wanting to be part of your life? We’ve missed out on so much.’
‘Perhaps I’m not being plain enough. Stop sending me letters. Stop breaking into my house and ruining perfectly good photos of Nick and me. And stop with the floral tributes. I don’t want your money. I don’t want your help with the Every Day project and I don’t want to see you again. For all I care, you can go ahead and build a giant Recuperation Inn on this very spot.’ She’d yelled so loud, her throat hurt and tears were pricking her eyes.
‘I never meant to hurt you.’
‘Then you didn’t try very hard.’ She got into the car and slammed the door shut. Her fingers shook as she turned the key. She performed a U-turn, leaving Jonathan in her dust.
She trembled as she drove, her emotions overloaded. Her eyes brimmed with tears and she wiped at them with the back of her hand. All the good times she had with Jonathan, all the memories they’d shared together and the love they’d felt for each other had been destroyed. Recalling their time together would never be the same now their relationship had changed so drastically. All Freya felt now was hurt and disappointment of the severest kind. The foundations of her life had been built upon lies and deception and here she was, preparing for motherhood. She knew all the things she wanted to teach her child, things she had to learn for herself through trial and experience. But would she really be able to do it when so much of her world had been based on untruths?
She needed to stop thinking about it so much. She needed to get absorbed in something else. She turned off the main road and headed for County Bridge.