Chapter Nineteen
Spencer
”Ah, why not.” This tiny-house idea intrigues me, and I can understand why some people enjoy the lifestyle. It”s much simpler, and as Connie said, cheaper too. But as I gaze up at the ceiling, I swear my muscles are cramping up just from thinking about sleeping in this miniature home. ”What else is there to see?”
Connie grabs my hand again and starts walking backward, forcing me to do the same. Then she points up toward the ceiling. ”See that little loft up there? That”s our bedroom.”
I crane my neck but can”t see much of the loft. What I can see convinces me I do not want to live in a tiny house. ”How do you get up there? I don”t see any stairs.”
Connie drags me over to the wall, where a ladder is attached to it. ”We climb up there, sweetie.”
”Can you stand up inside that cramped loft?”
”Oh, sure. It”s an A-frame roof.”
As if that explains everything. The ladder seems rather flimsy, particularly for a man of my size. I have never done any mountain climbing, but I think I would need to take a course on that before attempting to scale this ladder.
Connie turns to Tabitha. ”Would you like to show Spencer around the property? I”m sure he”d love to see your house.”
”And mine too,” Sabrina says. ”It”s a tiny-house masterpiece.”
Whether Tabitha and Sabrina have genuine sibling rivalry going on here, I can”t tell. I rather doubt Tabitha would behave that way unless she was teasing her sister. Sabrina was definitely teasing Tabitha when I first met the youngest family member.
Barry marches over to the door and thrusts it open. ”Tabby, why don”t you and Sabrina show our guest the rest of the property while Mom and I prepare for target-shooting practice.”
Am I actually going to shoot a firearm? I”ve never even used a water pistol. But I don”t want to offend Tabitha”s parents. Besides, I might actually enjoy a bit of target practice, just to find out if I have any talent for it. I was good at rugby back at uni, but I failed miserably the one time I let Dominic Rigby talk me into trying cricket. I lost the game but went home with a collection of bruises.
I doubt my rugby experience will give me any advantage with target shooting.
Connie and Barry escort us out of the house, then take off down a dirt path behind their home.
Tabitha claims my hand, leading me behind her parents” house and across the large clearing. I begin to get glimpses of other structures, though I can”t decipher what I”m seeing yet. Tree branches are in the way. Sabrina rushes ahead of us, turning around to walk backwards. Why? I have no idea. If I”d thought Tabitha was a bit strange when I met her, she now seems like the sanest one in the family.
Sabrina glances at her sister, then studies me. ”Do you have any siblings?”
”Yes. I have a brother, Kendall, and a sister, Bindy. Her full name is Belinda, but she prefers her nickname.”
”Does your brother have a nickname too?”
”Well, sort of. I call him Kenny, but he hates that. His other names aren”t the sort that I want to speak aloud.”
Sabrina”s brows hike up. ”Oh, now you”ve got to tell me. Can”t tease me with something that juicy and then drop the subject.”
I haven”t even told Tabitha about my brother”s other names. Kendall would hate it if I shared that information with anyone. But Tabitha isn”t just anyone. She”s my girlfriend, and Sabrina is her sister, so...I”ll be well in it if Kendall finds out what I”ve done. ”If you promise never to divulge the secret to anyone else ever, then I”ll tell you Kendall”s other names.”
Tabitha and Sabrina both stop walking. I stop too.
”Sure you want to violate your brotherly code?” Tabitha asks.
”Well, it”s really not a secret anymore. My family knows, and so do my mates.” I clear my throat. ”Kendall”s other names are all related to his former profession. He was known as Rod Thruster, Maverick of the Wild West End, King of the Pelvic Thrusts.”
Both women freeze, their expression blank.
And then they both erupt in laughter. Their eyes even begin to water.
I strap my arms over my chest and shake my head until they settle down again. ”I didn”t invent those names, you know. I would prefer never to utter those words ever again or to discuss it.”
Tabitha takes my hand. ”I”m sorry, Spence. That was very rude of us.”
Sabrina puckers her lips and studies me again. ”What sort of job did your brother have?”
I wince and cover my eyes with one hand. ”Kendall was a dancer at a male revue club.”
”That means he was a stripper,” Tabitha tells her sister. ”I”m sure you understand what that means.”
Sabrina”s jaw drops. ”A stripper? If he”s as hot as you are, Spencer, I need to go to London to meet your brother.”
”He is no longer a stripper. You”ll be disappointed by his usual behavior. Kendall is slightly uptight.”
Sabrina smirks at me. ”Have you ever performed in a male revue show?”
”Absolutely not. No one needs to see my bare arse.”
”I bet you”d be a great stripper.”
Tabitha smacks her sister”s arm. ”Cut that out. Spencer doesn”t want to discuss the stripper lifestyle with you.”
Sabrina raises her hands. ”Okay, sorry. You sure are protective of Spencer. Must be true love.”
What I have with Tabitha is not love of any sort, not yet. I might”ve felt as if I might possibly be falling for her, but it”s much too early to label it true love. Not sure I believe in that, anyway.
”Let”s get moving, Sabrina,” Tabitha says. ”And walk the normal way this time. You”re liable to smack your head into a tree branch.”
”Yes, Mom, whatever you say.”
The three of us continue strolling across the clearing, and at last, the trees part to reveal two tiny houses as well as a tiny shed. One house is painted pale pink, the other is a sunny yellow.
”Which house do you think is mine?” Tabitha asks. ”This is a deal-breaker question. If you get it wrong, I”ll have to dump you.”
”I already know which one belongs to you. It”s the yellow one.”
She gawps at me. ”That”s right. How did you know? You haven”t even gone inside yet.”
”You have the sunniest personality of anyone I”ve ever known. Naturally, you would live in a house that”s the color of the sunshine.”
”Awww,” Sabrina coos. ”That”s the best answer ever. Too bad my ex-husband never heard you say that. He still would”ve dumped me, but at least he would”ve seen a good role model.”
”How could any man divorce a Remington woman? You”re all treasures to be guarded and appreciated.”
Sabrina starts to cry.
Oh, bollocks. What have I done? I didn”t mean to upset her.
Before I can struggle to come up with an apology, Tabitha hurries over to hug her sister and glances back at me. ”You didn”t do anything wrong. Sabrina always cries when she thinks about her marriage. The divorce was hard on her.”
Sabrina wipes her eyes with the sleeve of her blouse and sniffles. ”I”m okay now, Tabby. And I am so happy that you found a great guy like Spencer. I”ll wait out here while you show him your house.”
Tabitha leads me inside the tiny home which seems to consist of just two rooms, though I can”t tell what the smallest room is. ”Let me give you the grand tour. My house is a little different from Sabrina”s and my parents” homes.”
”Yes, I can see that quite clearly. You have your own style. I already like your house, and I”ve only just stepped inside.”
”See, the kitchen is over in that corner, and it”s open to the living room. Unlike my parents, I have a TV in the corner there. I also have a closet, which is right next to the bathroom. I have a tub, a toilet, and a sink.”
”Yes, and I see the bedroom over there. I like the open plan of your home. It seems less cramped somehow.”
”There”s also a mirror on the bathroom wall.”
I wander over to the sofa, rotating in a circle to take in the full view. ”Your house is one story. That”s good. I”m afraid I”d have a ruddy awful time trying to squeeze myself into a loft bedroom.”
”Sounds like you want to spend the night here.”
”Yes, I do. Unless you prefer to drive back to Arlington tonight. I assumed we would stay overnight.”
Tabitha smiles, and her face lights up like the sunshine in the sky. ”I want to stay over too. My parents should get to know you better.”
”Hey, lovebirds!” Sabrina shouts. ”Are you done making out yet? I want Spence to see my house too.”
I clasp Tabitha”s hand as we leave Tabitha”s home. Sabrina seems quite keen on showing me her tiny dwelling, and I don”t want to disappoint her. When Tabitha had first told me about the unusual way her family lives, I had assumed their houses must have been self-built in a ramshackle way. Not sure why I assumed that. My brain apparently couldn”t grasp the concept.
As the three of us wander toward Sabrina”s home, my curiosity rears its head up. ”Did your family build these houses themselves? Or did you hire contractors?”
”A little of both,” Tabitha explains. ”We got an architect to draw up the plans, then we hired contractors to do the things we couldn”t, like putting in the plumbing. But the four of us put up the walls ourselves and painted everything.”
I gaze at her with a new appreciation. ”You know how to put up walls? Blimey. I can”t even hammer a loose nail into a board without cocking it up.”
Tabitha bumps her elbow into me, smiling up at me with sly sweetness. ”I would be happy to give you a crash course in tiny-house building techniques.”
Sabrina smirks and winks at me. ”I”d be happy to show Spencer how to pound those nails.”
Her emphasis on the words pound and nail make her meaning clear. Tabitha”s sister is making a sexual metaphor.
And my girlfriend seems none too pleased with that. ”Sabrina, stop hitting on Spence. You”re making him uncomfortable.”
Sabrina rolls her eyes. ”I wasn”t hitting on him. I was making conversation.”
”Uh-huh. Sure you were.”
I throw my arm around Tabitha. ”Ladies, please don”t fight over me. I know I”m irresistible, but I don”t want to come between two sisters. I do have several mates back home who are single. Maybe I could set Sabrina up on a blind date if she comes to England with us for Kendall”s wedding.”
Both women stop walking at the same instant. And both gawp at me as if I suggested we should have a ménage à trois here in this clearing.
Sabrina”s mouth has fallen open. ”You would invite me to your brother”s wedding?”
”Yes. Why not? Believe me, my family would love to meet you and your parents.”
Tabitha blinks rapidly, her eyes wide. ”You could get invites for our whole family?”
”Isn”t that what I just said? It”s my brother”s wedding. I can invite whomever I like. You and your family have been incredibly welcoming to me, a complete stranger, so the least I can do is give you a lovely little weekend holiday in England.”
No one speaks for several seconds.
Then Tabitha and Sabrina rush at me as one, hugging me and kissing my cheeks, jumping up and down, laughing too.
Tabitha plants a hard kiss on my mouth. ”Thank you, Spence. You”re the best.”
”It”s not as if I proposed marriage.”
”You did something even better. You”ve just become a member of our family.”
”Do I get a T-shirt or something?”
She rubs her thumb over my lips. ”You get something even better. You can call me Tabby.”