Chapter 28
In her pretty sundress, feeling like a lemon chiffon pie being served up for cocktail hour, Mathilda took a seat on the cottage’s poolside patio.
A striped umbrella shaded the round glass table.
The sun was dipping lower in the sky, flirting with the edge of the umbrella.
Ceramic pots filled with jasmine sent an ethereal fragrance wafting over the table.
Her mother poured her a glass of juice from a large pitcher. Mathilda knew that joyful orange color—it had to be lilikoi. A quick sip told her it was a lot more than passionfruit, though. The vodka in that fruit cocktail went right to her head.
Another sip, and she finally felt herself relax. The world took on a light and hazy glow. Maybe it wasn’t so bad to be lounging by a pool drinking cocktails instead of hacking her way through a jungle with a machete. The contrast was disorienting, like something out of a fairy tale.
All of this was like a fairy tale, even her family.
She smiled at her silver fox father, her fairy queen mother, her dashing younger brother. “It’s actually nice to see you all.”
“Don’t sound so surprised.” Jamie laughed a little. His still-wet hair was slicked back from his face and tucked behind his ears. He must have gone for another dip while she’d taken her shower.
Duncan laughed too. He had volunteered to take the chair that faced the sun. Under his gold-rimmed sunglasses, his cheeks were ruddy from the intense Hawaii sun.
“Make sure you use sunscreen,” she told him. “You’d be surprised how fast you can burn here.”
“Jamie already hooked me up.” Duncan pulled a tube of SPF 100 from the pocket of his cargo pants. “Apparently we Brits need top-shelf protection. He also hooked me up with the phrase ‘hooked me up.’ That’s a new one to me.”
“Happy to help. If you’re going to marry an American, you should know the lingo.
” Jamie cast a vague smile around the table, not meeting anyone’s eyes directly.
That was a sign that he was unhappy about something.
Mathilda couldn’t say she knew her brother well, but she knew that much.
Maybe he too thought this arranged marriage idea was antiquated and absurd.
She didn’t dare ask him how his love life was going.
He got irritated whenever anyone broached that topic.
“Absolutely. I’ve been streaming TikTok videos to prepare.” Duncan leaned toward Charlotte. “Was it quite a culture shock when you moved to America?”
“Oh yes. Everything is different here. But I had Mark, and that was all that really mattered to me at that point in my life.” The two of them lost themselves in one of those long eye-locks that always made Mathilda cringe.
But not this time. For the first time in her life, she understood what they might be feeling, that sense of nothing else existing except for that one particular person. She’d experienced it herself now, with Rory.
She stole a glance at Duncan, but his expression was unreadable behind his sunglasses. Marrying him…it would mean giving up any chance of a connection like what her parents had. Just when she finally knew what that might feel like, she’d have to let it go.
But did she, really? Or were her feelings for Rory just the result of the crazy situation they’d been thrown into?
Focus on Duncan. Get to know him.
“What’s your family like?” she asked him. “Any brothers or sisters?”
“No, it’s just me. My parents had nearly given up on having children when I finally came along. My dad was nearly fifty. We lived in a big manor house in Scotland, and I felt quite alone most of my childhood.” His wistful tone touched her.
“That sounds pretty lonely,” she said softly. Maybe that could be a connection point for them. She too had felt alone as a kid, mostly because she spent so much time in her head, entertaining herself with her own imagination.
“Yes, quite lonely. That’s why from an early age I knew I wanted a family.”
“Right, you said that in your letter. It’s funny because when I used to babysit as a teenager, I would bribe Jamie to come with me.
He was always much better with kids than I was.
I’d curl up with a book and read while he played games with them.
” She caught Duncan’s reaction, a subtle flinch away from her.
“Don’t worry, I like kids now. But at that age I couldn’t be bothered. Lucky for me, Jamie was a good sport.”
She kicked her brother under the table. He roused himself and plastered on a smile. “Still am. I’ll be an awesome uncle. Whenever they want to play video games, I’m there. But you’ll probably have your kids chasing birds across the Arctic or something.”
“No thanks, I’m a tropical girl.” She turned back to Duncan, who’d been following their conversation with an unreadable expression “Anyway, back to you and your wish for a family. I can see why it’s important to you, as an only child, and not just for well, dynastic reasons.”
“And yet the Aberdeen dynasty must live on,” he said dramatically, raising his glass in the air. “Our ancestors have decreed it so. Do you ever think about the sadness embedded in this legacy? At its heart it’s about two people who couldn’t be together in their own lifetimes.”
“Well…to be honest, I haven’t given the whole thing much thought,” she admitted. “I guess it was different for you, growing up as an Aberdeen. Your parents must have talked about it with you.”
“Endlessly,” he admitted. “Especially because our family line came close to dying out. If I hadn’t been born, there would be no more direct descendants of that original Marquess of Aberdeen, just a few distant cousins.”
Wow. The pressure on him must be even greater because of that. “I’m sorry your parents couldn’t be here with us.”
“They send their best regards. They don’t travel anymore.
It’s them and their basset hounds and a household staff that’s just as old as they are.
They keep having funerals for yet another footman or driver.
Whenever I suggest hiring someone new, they launch into a litany of complaints about the younger generation.
When I point out that I’m part of that generation, they say I’m a fluke and that I belong in some past bygone era. ”
“I can see that,” Mathilda said thoughtfully, tilting her head to study him.
“There’s something very…courtly about you.
” He was gentle, that was what it was. She enjoyed listening to him talk, that flow of British-accented wit, with never a pause for an “um” or an “er.” He would be amusing, as a husband.
But distant, she thought. Never truly revealing himself, hiding behind well-told anecdotes and witty observations.
“Well, if this all goes according to plan, we should consider traveling to Scotland for a second wedding,” Charlotte said brightly.
“A second one?” Mathilda was aghast. She still hadn’t wrapped her head around one, let alone two.
“I was hoping someone would suggest that.” Duncan smiled broadly at her mother. “I didn’t want to ask, since it’s such a long trip.”
“I always love going home to England. We all love it. Jamie even considered studying at Cambridge.”
“Oh?” Duncan turned his sunglass-masked gaze toward her brother. “What made you decide against it?”
Jamie gave a vague wave of his hand. “It was never a serious plan. I would have been running away, and I decided I had to face my problems head-on.”
This was the first Mathilda had ever heard about some crisis in Jamie’s life. That familiar sad pang twisted in her heart. Why hadn’t he confided in her? Was she such a bad sister that he didn’t think he could trust her?
“A breakup?” Duncan asked.
“You could call it that.” That cryptic answer had them all curious.
“Jamie, darling, why is this the first we’re hearing about this?” Charlotte cried.
“It wasn’t a big deal.” Jamie drowned his discomfort in the last of his lilikoi cocktail, then poured himself another one. “I didn’t want to upset you guys.”
“Well, I am upset. The idea that you endured a heartbreak without any family support, well, that breaks my heart. You can tell us anything, I hope you know that.”
From the look on her brother’s face, Mathilda could tell exactly what he was thinking. We can’t tell you anything because you’re perfect and we’re not.
“Mom, let it be,” Mathilda said gently. “Jamie doesn’t have to tell anyone anything unless he wants to.”
“Well of course, sweetheart, but…” Charlotte looked to her husband, who was already there, patting her hand, soothing her distress.
Same as it ever was. The two of them never really needed anyone else. Which, as their child, had always been a difficult thing to absorb.
“It’s okay,” Jamie said abruptly. He caught Mathilda’s gaze, then shot a look at Duncan, then looked back at the table. “I can talk about it.”
Duncan pushed his chair back. “If you’d like me to leave…”
“No, you’re going to be part of the family, aren’t you?” Jamie shrugged. “You can stay. Unless you don’t want to be part of family drama…”
“Are you joking? I live for family drama. Mine has none because we’re all too old and tired.”
“You’re barely in your twenties,” Mathilda pointed out.
“I’m an old soul, always have been. Even at Eton, I spent more time with the resident teachers than the other students. But let’s not take away from Jamie’s moment.” He gestured for Jamie to take the floor.
Charlotte clutched Mark’s arm as if their ship was about to hit a reef.
“I’m already bracing myself. Was it that vegan chef we hired for a time?
I never trusted her. How can you trust someone who eats seaweed at every meal?
And those sprouting jars she kept everywhere.
I thought she was simply hiding my hazelnut creamer from me, then it turned out that she threw it out, along with every other trace of dairy in the entire—”
“I’m gay,” said Jamie flatly.
“Kitchen,” Charlotte ended, the word landing limply in the sudden silence.
Mathilda’s mouth fell open. She’d honestly never considered the possibility that her brother might be gay. Jamie had always had girlfriends hanging around.
“Since when?” she asked, then winced. That had not come out the way she’d intended. “I mean, when did you realize?”
“It’s been coming on.” Jamie’s gaze was still fixed on the table. “It never really felt right with any of the girls I dated. Then I, uh, got to know a boy in my calculus class and, well, that’s when I thought about leaving the country. I was confused.”
“But you’re not confused now?” their father asked gently. Charlotte was still frozen in shock, hanging onto his arm.
“No. I mean, not about that. I’m definitely gay. I’m sorry it—”
“Don’t be sorry,” Mathilda cried. “That’s not something anyone should apologize for!”
He frowned at her, silently telling her to back down, this was his scene, not hers. “I was going to say, I’m sorry it took so long to tell you guys.”
“We’re fine with it,” Mark said, leaning across the table to pat his hand. “We always would have been.”
“Yes, I know. I wasn’t afraid to tell you or anything like that. I wanted to tell everyone at once, that’s all. That hardly ever happens anymore.”
Mathilda was struck with a pang of guilt. That was her fault, wasn’t it? Loving Hawaii so much, being so caught up in her projects that she didn’t get home very often.
“Also, I thought, uh, Duncan should know in case that changes anything with the, uh, bequest.” Jamie was staring at the table again, looking slightly mortified.
“Well, it better not,” Mathilda declared. “If it does, I want nothing to do with it.” She turned toward Duncan, whose face was still unreadable. She wished he’d take those sunglasses off.
“Of course it doesn’t.” Charlotte finally found her voice. “Why would it? Darling, I’m glad you told us. Thank you.” She flitted around the table and dropped a kiss on the top of his head. “Thank you, sweet boy.”
“Must we make a whole production?” Jamie grumbled. “Can’t we just get back to Mathilda? Are we going to have to bow to her if she has a title?”
Mathilda made a face at him, but inside, her heart was swelling with emotion. She would have been shocked if her parents hadn’t been supportive of Jamie, but it was still wonderful to see it play out that way.
Duncan lifted his glass. “To Jamie,” he said. “Well done.”
“To Jamie.” Everyone else followed suit and clicked their glasses together in a barrage of clinks and splashes and cheers. For the first time since she could remember, Mathilda felt like part of a family, and not some odd duck floating around the edges.
Was it because of Duncan? Maybe so. He’d brought them all together like this. He’d inspired Jamie’s confession. He was a sweet and lovely person, an amusing conversationalist, intelligent, tolerant. Pretty perfect, in fact.
Did they have chemistry?
She eyed him as he laughed with her family. He was good-looking, even though that sculpted style of haircut was not her thing. Very fit. Didn’t the British say “fit” instead of “hot?” Duncan was both. The setting sun was giving his skin and hair a very sexy golden glow.
And yet, no. They had no chemistry. They might as well be brother and sister.
They even looked a little alike, both blond-ish and blue-eyed.
She tried to imagine being naked in bed with him, but all she could picture was dark eyes and a sinfully sexy mouth.
She blinked, hoping that image would vanish.
It did, only to be replaced with the memory of Rory braced over her, the moonlight gilding his skin, his muscles rippling as he flexed his hips.
Goddamn it, Rory Baker. Honestly, why did he have to crash into her jungle at just the wrong time? If not for him, she probably would have been perfectly happy to marry Duncan. The guy even liked Hawaii. He’d probably agree to spend some time here so she could keep up with her ‘alalā project.
But now Rory was the only man she could picture herself with.
She put her hand in her pocket, feeling the crystal he’d slipped to her. Why had he done that? What was she supposed to do with it now? Maybe she should just toss it in the pool and be done with it.
She noticed that her hand was getting warmer. A lot warmer. Something was happening to the crystal. She jumped to her feet.
“Be right back.”
“What’s the matter, darling?” her mother called.
The vibrations coming from the crystal were really something. She’d noticed them before, a kind of low hum, but they were even more magnified now. She needed to get a closer look at it, maybe in the last rays of daylight, without showing it to anyone else. “Nothing. Bathroom.”