Chapter 2 #2
“No. Not jealous. I have what I need in my life. I’m not farming because I want to get rich.
I farm because I love the land, and I earn an honest living that’s enough for me and my child.
And I don’t make it a habit to tell others how inadequate they are because they’re not just like me.
” She started to speak but before she could, he added, “I have several friends who farm close to a thousand acres in addition to holding regular jobs. I don’t look at them as less successful than I am.
They’re just walking a different path, and it’s their path, not mine to criticize. ”
Dawn put down her napkin and leaned back into her chair. “I suppose it comes from having two brothers. I’m very competitive, more so than most men. I want to excel at what I do. I want to be the best. And I’m not going to apologize for that.”
“Excelling at something is fine. It’s the looking down on others who don’t have the same definition of success as you do that can make you look …” He trailed off, trying to find the word.
She didn’t give him a chance to find it. “Can make me look what?”
“Kind of, I dunno, critical?” Kyle answered, not sure if that was what he meant but desperate to find something.
“You mean bitchy, don’t you?” Dawn said, her voice rising. At least one other couple in the dining room turned and looked at them.
“If I’d meant bitchy, that’s what I would’ve said,” Kyle told her.
“I didn’t come here to argue with you, but I also didn’t come here to be made to feel small and insignificant because I don’t have almost fifteen thousand acres.
I’ve got what I can afford. My parents have entrusted the farm to me, and I’m proud to be able to farm it for them and make us all more money.
I’m sorry you find that to be small peanuts.
I’m very proud of what I do and the way I make my living. ”
Dawn sat there for a few seconds, staring at him.
Finally, she said, “Well, I don’t think this is going anywhere.
We’re obviously in two very different worlds.
I wish you success with your little farming operation, but I think we’d be poorly matched in the dating pool.
” She took the last bite of her hot brown, then put down her fork and napkin.
“Don’t worry. I’ll still pay for your meal. ”
“You don’t have to pay for my meal. I’m more than capable of paying for it. I had every intention of paying for yours too,” he said as she rose from her chair, so he stood too.
“That’s not necessary. I obviously make more than you do. Well, it was nice meeting you. I wish you luck finding another match on the site. Goodnight, Kyle.” The woman turned on her heel before Kyle could say another word and marched to the door.
“Sir, would you like some coffee?” the server asked Kyle when she approached the table.
Kyle shook his head. “No. I’m good. I just need to pay my ticket and leave,” he said, trying to collect his thoughts.
“Right away, sir,” the girl told him and headed toward the kitchen.
He couldn’t wait to get out of there. The last thing he needed was a woman he’d only just met telling him what a failure he was. Life was hard enough. He didn’t need anyone who’d make it harder. And if he kissed that frog?
No telling what he’d get. But the one thing he didn’t need was a lip full of warts.
All it had done for three days was rain.
There was nothing to do but work on the tractor, and Myla was going stir-crazy in the house.
Connie picked her up to take her to their house so she could at least see the boys, and that left Kyle alone.
After catching up all his bookkeeping chores and doing some long-range planning for crop rotation, there wasn’t much left to be done except laundry.
Connie would feed Myla, so Kyle looked in the freezer and found a frozen dinner.
He ate it in the silent house and thought about Becky.
Her love was all he’d ever known, and it had been more than enough.
They’d been high school sweethearts, then broke up two weeks after graduation because she was going to Europe with the community college choir there.
Her reasoning had been that she didn’t want him sitting around waiting for her in case she met someone.
That lasted for about three days, and she called him from London, crying and begging him to take her back.
It had taken all of three seconds for him to tell her that he’d be right there waiting for her when she returned.
After that, they’d been inseparable. They waited until she got her associate’s degree before they married, and then planned and hoped for a little one to fill the second bedroom in the tiny house.
It had taken a few years, but when she found out she was pregnant, she told him by buying a king cake for Mardi Gras and bringing it home.
When he cut the cake and found the baby, she told him it wasn’t the only one in the room, and he whooped and hollered and swung her around, kissing her the whole time.
He remembered every moment of the disaster that had begun before Myla could even arrive.
There was the dimple that appeared in her breast, and then the palpation that revealed the lump.
The biopsy came after that, and then her firm decision to undergo no treatments that would hamper her ability to take care of Myla in any way.
She’d gone on bravely, enjoying a baby shower, looking at the ultrasounds the doctor’s office gave her, and smiling for picture after picture with her big belly front and center.
By the time the baby had been delivered, it was obvious to everyone that Becky was in trouble, but she smiled and went on with her day-to-day life as a new mom until she couldn’t go on anymore.
Kyle stared off into space, mechanically lifting his fork, taking a bite, and repeating until the little dinner tray was empty, all the while trying to remember her smile, her laugh, and the way she’d looked as the nurse had placed Myla on her chest. It had been a dream come true, followed by the most horrible nightmare he’d ever had to live through.
At times he wished he hadn’t; he wished he’d died instead of her, because life was almost impossible to live without her.
And yet, there he was with a six-year-old daughter.
He knew Connie was trying to help, but being alone was almost more than he could bear.
The house still carried touches of Becky everywhere, even though Gwen had talked him into donating Becky’s clothes to the town clothes closet about a year after her death.
Parting with her shoes had been even harder.
She loved shoes, and even though he gave them all away, he couldn’t part with the western boots he’d bought her for Christmas the year before she lost her fight.
They were still there, on the closet floor, and from time to time he’d pull them out and hug them to his chest. When he held them, he felt closer to her, and that was all that mattered.
When he’d finally finished the tiny meal, he rinsed out the tray before shoving it into the trash, then cleaned out the sink and turned off the kitchen light.
Myla would be home in about an hour, so he went back into his little office.
It was a tiny bedroom, barely more than a closet, in the back of the house, but it gave him some privacy to work and think.
He opened his laptop, typed in the PIN, and then remembered to check the dating site.
It surprised him to find a message, so he opened it and read it silently.
Hi! I’m Dorinda! I was reading your profile and I’d love to meet you. If you’d like to meet up, just send me a reply and we’ll work something out.
As soon as he’d closed the message, he hit her profile, and he was pleasantly surprised.
It seemed she was also a widow, had a little boy about ten, and enjoyed hiking and swimming.
Those were two things he liked too, so those were things they had in common, plus it said she’d grown up with a farm in the family.
The picture that accompanied the profile was of a slim, smiling woman with blond, shoulder-length hair and bright eyes.
According to her info, she was a nurse in Oak Grove.
Perfect! It only took him a couple of seconds to answer.
Hi, Dorinda. It’s Kyle. I’d like to meet you too.
He thought for a few seconds. The last couple of dates hadn’t gone very well, so maybe he’d go for something less date-like.
We could meet for coffee if you’d like. Just let me know where and when.
As soon as he’d sent it, he headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth and comb his hair.
After he washed his face, he slipped out of his clothes and into a pair of pajama pants and a clean tee, then headed back to the computer.
He was shocked to see that the woman hadn’t waited a split second to answer.
How is Saturday morning at 11:00? My son has a church function that morning, so he won’t be with me. Josie’s Coffee Corner in Hoptown? Let me know.
Kyle couldn’t believe how well that would work out.
Sounds great. 11:00 in Hopkinsville at Josie’s Coffee Corner. I’ll be there! Thanks for answering so quickly. See you then.
Saturday. It was Thursday. Two more days and he’d try again. He prayed that this time would go better than the last two. A guy could only stand so many frogs. There had to be a princess out there somewhere.
Myla had spent the night with her little friend, Kenyan Warren, and Kenyan’s mom was taking the girls to the zoo in Nashville for the day on Saturday.
She’d asked if Kyle wanted to come, but he’d never really liked Annalee Warren.
She was always gossiping about someone, and he wanted no part of that.