Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“I’m sorry,” he says breathlessly as he gently rubs his forehead against mine. “I’ve never had the chance to do this before because I wanted to, but I won’t force you, Gen.”
I put my hands on his chest and gently shove him back. He looks a little deflated, but the smile he forces onto his face masks the pain of rejection he assumes he’s facing.
“Tell you what,” I begin as I glance at the classroom door. “If you can promise me that this isn’t a trick, that you really want this, I’ll give you something no one else has taken from me yet.”
Lake runs a hand over his mouth as he contemplates the offer. I hope he knows this means that I’ve never had sex before and that he’ll have to teach me, but there was always something special about him that stuck with me.
Trust.
I was the only person that he ever saw worthy of placing his trust in.
He drops his hand as he steals a glance at me, then quickly makes his way toward the entrance of the room. He closes the door, then retrieves one of the chairs to rig the handle.
Lake smiles as soon as he turns around and starts closing the gap between us again.
“I promise.”
With a nod, I reach down for the hem of my shirt and pull it over my head with shaky hands. Lake watches for a moment, completely transfixed, but I think it has to do more with the fact that this isn’t, part of the Bitch Brigade Blackmail Scheme.
“Can I tell you a secret?” he asks as he places a hand on either side of the table, boxing me in.
Another shiver goes through my body when he presses himself against me.
“After the first time you sat and talked to me when we were kids, any time I was forced to fuck someone, I found a way to make it better.”
“How?”
“Every time I closed my eyes, I saw your face,” he confesses softly. “With each and every one of them.”
I push the hair out of his eyes and when he turns his lips against the palm of my hand, I smile.
“But then I went home and thought about how I tried to push you away and it fucked me up.” He pauses for a moment before he continues, “Maybe I can finally put the nightmare of being someone’s fucktoy behind me.”
“Lake?”
“Yes, Gen?”
“Don’t be gentle.”
“What?” he asks as he turns his face toward mine.
“You need to take out the aggression of all of those years so you can start over again. I’m not going anywhere, I promise. I can take it. Even if it looks like I can’t.”
Lake leans down and gently kisses me as he moves his hands up my back.
“So to be absolutely sure, you’re going to let me be myself,” he murmurs as he pulls the undergarment off.
I nod as his eyes instantly lower to my small breasts and I can feel the heat of embarrassment wash over me.
It’s not because I’m standing here in front of him like this. It’s because I’ve always hated being built more like a boy than a girl and I have so little to offer him.
“I’ll do my best not to hurt you,” he says as he looks up into my eyes again and wraps his hands around my tits, squeezing them so goddamn tightly that a sudden burst of stars explodes in front of me.
“Liar,” I grunt out, and Lake chuckles again.
“I said I’d do my best; I didn’t exactly say what that was. And if you’re willing to let me be myself with you, then you’re going to have to learn a higher threshold of pain.”
I grit my teeth, but nod.
I’m not going to puss out on him after I told him he could do whatever he wanted with me.
“I’m ready. Do your worst, Lake Walker.”
He leans his head back and lets out a laugh before something in him changes. In the next breath, he turns me around and roughly pushes me against the table. I let out a grumble as the air escapes me upon impact, then become rigid the moment I feel his hand wrap around the back of my neck.
He uses his thumb and forefinger to apply pressure and I close my eyes tightly. If his idea of getting off has anything to do with choking me to death, then clearly I’ve fucked up.