Chapter 7
CHAPTER SEVEN
CORINNE
Well, that was a stressful game. I remember playing spoons when I was younger, but not at the level Tiffany and her cousins play it.
It's more intense than it should be. All I want now is to change into my jammies and fall into a deep sleep.
I know Stella and Johnny have a day full of stuff planned for us tomorrow, but I'll also need time to slip away from the group to take pictures of Tiffany and Spencer.
It can always wait until we get back to Austin, but the scenery around here is absolutely gorgeous.
The light is off when I enter the room. That's one thing about Carter.
He's quick to fall asleep once he's in bed.
I only hope he appreciates me making his bed for him, considering it wasn't something I had to do.
I pull my phone out of my back pocket and use the dim light to find my suitcase.
I didn't even unpack everything earlier and will probably wake up Carter while looking for my stuff.
I unzip the suitcase as slowly as possible to minimize the noise.
Present me is grateful that I put my jammies on the top.
Not that it's anything special. T-shirts and shorts are the fanciest I get.
With the clothes in hand, I debate going to the bathroom to change on the off-chance Carter is actually awake.
I shine my phone in his direction, but his eyes are closed.
I think that's safe enough. I pull my shirt off and replace it with my sleep shirt.
Next is the pants and I'm ready for bed.
Crap my bra. I unfasten it and pull it through the sleeves of my shirt.
Tossing it on my suitcase, I turn back toward the bed.
I don't bother plugging my phone in. I don't have the energy to find the cord and the alarm isn't needed.
Sliding between the sheets, I get comfortable.
My eyes are drifting closed when I hear the air mattress move.
The plastic squeaking is annoying as fuck.
I don't know if I'll be able to sleep if he keeps flopping like a fish and making that noise.
After a few moments he settles and the noise stops. Finally, I can fall asleep.
Closing my eyes, I turn to my side and start drifting into a dream filled oblivion.
Moments away from deep sleep the mattress squeaks again, and I sit up, sighing.
"Carter." He doesn't answer so I scoot to the side of the bed the air mattress is on and lean over.
"Carter," I whisper yell. Still nothing.
I reach out and shake his arm and say his name again. This time louder, "Carter."
He sits up and I can't tell because the only light in here is coming from the moon, but it doesn't look like he's been asleep at all. "Yeah." He rubs his hands over his eyes, but he's not fooling me.
"Can you please stop moving around? The mattress is keeping me from sleeping."
"I can move to the couch." He looks toward the door, but I know he wouldn't be comfortable with that, either. "Sorry I'm keeping you awake."
He could always sleep in the bed with me.
I mean it's not the first time we've done that, but also not ideal with my brother a couple of doors down.
"It's okay." Now's the time to decide. If he sleeps on the couch, he'll end up back on that damn air mattress when everyone goes downstairs, and I'll still get woken up.
But if he sleeps on the bed...both of us will actually get some sleep.
"Look, we're both adults. And even though we have a past, I feel like we can share this bed without things getting weird. "
"Are you sure?" Carter cocks his head to the side, "I have no problem sleeping on the couch."
"Nope," I shake my head, "I'm not sure at all.
But I need some sleep or else I'm going to have a massive hangover in the morning.
This is the easiest way to solve the problem.
" I scoot back to my side of the bed and wait for him to get in.
I grab all the decorative pillows from the bottom of the bed and put them between us.
"There. This should keep us away from each other and temptation. "
"I don't think all this is necessary." He points toward the wall of pillows. "I'm perfectly capable of keeping my hands to myself."
Little does he know, it's not him I'm worried about.
While I did brush my leg against his as a distraction during the game, I also wanted to see how he would react.
Everything he's done today signals that he wants to build something between us again.
But I don't know if I can. What tore us apart last time was not being on the same page, and I refuse to let that be the case in the future. "It'll make me feel better, okay?"
"Okay." Wow, that was easy. I expected an argument.
The bed shifts and I assume he's laying on his side, facing the opposite direction.
To make me feel better? Maybe, but most likely to keep temptation at bay.
Especially after that almost kiss earlier.
He's quiet for a few moments, and I think he's gone to sleep but then just above a whisper he speaks. "Rinne?"
It takes everything in me not to groan. I just want to go to sleep. "Yeah."
"Do you think there could ever be an us again?"
Seriously? He wants to talk about this now?
He's had so many opportunities over the last six months to talk to me.
But he didn't. Not that I would have answered the phone, and I have been avoiding him at all costs.
So, the opportunity wasn't really there.
"I don't know, Carter. We had fun when we were together, but I can't be in a relationship in secret. It's not fair to me."
"I understand that." The bed shifts again.
I'm not sure which way he's facing because I'm scared to look.
Scared to see what might be written all over his face.
The fact we're having this conversation in the dark with only the light of the moon makes it feel heavy and intimate.
Both things I don't know that I'm ready to feel right now.
"I'm going to sleep now." I fluff my pillow and pull the blanket tighter around me. A safe little cocoon to ward off the feelings bubbling up once again.
"One more question." Ugh, he just won't stop. "If I were to remedy the secret part, would you consider giving us another go?"
In all honesty, I never wanted to end things with him.
Not really. Even when my step-brother warned me against him.
I imagined a future with him, but he was too scared to tell Justin we were together.
How was I supposed to build a life with him, or possibly start a family with him, if I had to hide it all from the people who mean everything to me?
"I don't know, Carter. Maybe? But it would have to be something we tell everyone from the beginning.
No more secrets. It felt wrong to hide our relationship, and it feels even worse that you are the one that pushed for that so hard. "
The bed moves one last time and I'm certain the conversation is over. "Goodnight, Corinne."
"Goodnight." As much as I want to sleep, at least that is out in the open now. He knows how I feel and he can do whatever he wants with the information. Sleep comes quickly once the night stills.
Weight on my waist jostles me from my sleep.
I glance over my shoulder and the pillows are squished between me and Carter.
His arm is slung over my waist and his hand’s gripping my shirt.
A clear sign he's not quite ready to let me go.
Despite my protests, I'm not ready to let him go, either.
I should push his arm off me. I know that, but for now I'm going to sink in the comfort of him being with me.
Tomorrow, we'll have to have a conversation.
One that is long overdue. And most importantly, if I continue to let him hold me like this.
Like his life depends on it. We need to be on the same page.