Chapter 33
thirty-three
MAYA
“Of course we’re coming with you.”
When I told Liam I was going back to visit Ellie this morning, I assumed I’d be going alone.
“It’s really okay, I’m just worried after everything Ezra said last night. I need to see her. You stay here, enjoy your day off.”
“Maya,” Liam says, wrapping a scarf around Poppy’s neck. “We’re coming. Even if we didn’t care about Ellie, we’d want to support you. But as it is, we want to see how she’s doing too. You don’t have to go through this alone.”
God, he’s sweet. But also, I’m not sure I want him to come. I decided last night I have to help Ellie, in any way that I can. And having Liam and Poppy with me is only going to make it harder.
“Are you having second thoughts?” Liam asks when we’re halfway to Burlington.
“What? What do you mean?”
“About me. About last night. You seem like maybe…”
“No.” I turn in my seat and try my best to catch his gaze. “Zero second thoughts. I promise. I’m just…everything changed last night. Not with us, but with Ellie. I’ve never seen Ezra like that. I have to do something.”
My lip must be swollen and red from how much I’ve been chewing on it. I spent half the night going over different phrases in my head, trying to find the perfect words to wish for Ellie to be healthy, words that couldn’t get twisted in any way. Now I just hope that once I see her, I’ll know exactly what to say, how to make things right.
Ezra might feel powerless, Theo too, but I’m not.
Words have always been my favorite source of magic. My own personal brand. It might terrify me sometimes but it’s also a part of me. It’s made me who I am. Maybe I need to take the thing that scares me the most and spin it into my very own superpower.
Because I have power. And it’s about time I use it.
“Are you—” Liam stops abruptly, choosing his words. “You’re going to do it, aren’t you?”
“I have to. I can’t just wait around and hope for the best. What if—” No. I won’t say it. Because it doesn’t matter what could happen. I’m not going to let it.
“I was just about to call you,” Ezra says when he sees us outside the hospital entrance.
He looks different from last night. Worse. His eyes are red again, but now he looks like a ghost, all pale skin and dark circles under his eyes. He looks like someone who spent the night in a hospital under fluorescent lights and didn’t sleep a wink.
His hair sticks up in every direction, like he was actually trying to pull it out.
“What’s going on?” I ask. “Why are you out here?”
“They just took her into surgery. I…I just can’t be with my parents right now. I needed air.”
“Surgery?”
“Her blood pressure wouldn’t come down. They have to do an emergency c-section.” His words sound robotic, like he refuses to internalize what they mean.
But he has to be wrong. “She’s not due for at least another two months.” I start doing the math in my head but Ezra beats me to it.
“Eleven weeks,” he says weakly.
Liam has been doing a decent job of keeping Poppy distracted. God knows I don’t want her to be traumatized by this situation. But suddenly he grabs my hand. “I think it might be time, Maya.”
My heart feels like it’s beating out of my chest. I’m not ready. I thought I’d get to see her, maybe even get her permission. Something about this feels wrong without?—
“Where’s Theo?” I ask Ezra. “Is he with her?”
“No, he can’t see her until she’s out of surgery. None of us can. He said he wanted to go talk to his parents.”
His parents? They died years ago. I look to Liam, see if he has any clue what it means.
“Does the hospital have a chapel?”
I sprint through the hospital like I’m training for a damn marathon.
The chapel’s tiny. And very inclusive. Three crosses hang right next to a beautiful stained glass Jewish star.
Theo’s alone, sitting on one of the benches, his body folded forward with his arms resting on his knees.
I slow my steps and take a few breaths to compose myself. Then I hear him talking, half the words caught in his throat.
“I know you helped me get her back. You both have already done so much for me. But now I’m scared I’m about to lose everything. She means everything to me. I’m just asking for one more favor.”
He really did leave to talk to his parents. God, I don’t know if I can do this. I pivot, turning back toward the door, but then I hear him.
“Maya?”
Shit. I turn back around. “Hey, Theo.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Looking for you, actually. I’m so sorry if I interrupted you.”
He looks down at his feet, then over to the wall with the crosses, like he’s searching for whatever I did interrupt. “Ellie’s umm…she’s in surgery. They said it could be a while.”
“I know.” He looks surprised by this, like he can’t understand why I came to him if it wasn’t for information.
“Look, I have to tell you something. And I know it’s going to sound ridiculous, but I’m out of time. I want to help Ellie and I think I know how, so can you keep an open mind for a few minutes? Can you just…believe what I’m about to tell you?”
He blinks a few times, digesting my words. “Okay.”
“I have…an ability. Any time I wish for something, if I do it aloud, it comes true.” I pause, trying to gauge a reaction from him, but he just stares blankly at me. This isn’t going to be as easy as it was with Liam. He had a reason to believe me. But I don’t have time to earn Theo’s trust right now. “Fuck it,” I mutter and then wince realizing where we are. “I wish I had a hot cup of coffee right now.”
In seconds, a nurse walks in, rolling a cart of beverage dispensers, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee beans swirling through the air. She quietly mentions that tea and coffee are available before she makes a polite exit.
Theo’s eyes go wide. “What the…”
I walk over to the cart and pour myself a cup. It feels like I’ll have bad karma if I don’t.
“I know. It’s crazy, right? I don’t know how or why or anything really. I just know that it works. Every single time. And I promise if you have questions I will answer them but for right now, I just need to know if?—”
“Can you wish for Ellie to be okay? And for the baby? Can you do that?”
Well, at least I know we’re on the same page. Theo’s shock has immediately morphed into hope. It excites and terrifies me.
“I want to. I want your permission to do it. But I need you to know that most of the wishes I’ve made…they backfired.” As soon as I say it, coffee spills over the rim of the cup and onto my hand, burning me. “Ow.” I set down the overly full cup and suck on the burned skin. “See what I mean?”
“Backfired? What does that mean? You got exactly what you wished for. You just happened to pour too much.”
“But that’s the thing. When I was a kid and wished for my dad to stop traveling for work, he did. But it meant we had to move every year. I wished away my whole childhood to travel the world with my parents. The day I was supposed to elope, I wished for Ryan to be honest with me and he told me he’d been lying since the day we met, that he never loved me. There are always these unforeseen consequences that are impossible to predict. I want to help Ellie. I’m prepared to do whatever I can, but I’m also scared out of my mind that I’ll mess up something else. So I’m not making this decision without you. She’s your girl too.”
“Hey,” Theo says, grabbing my shoulder. His face is thoughtful, his eyes roving over me. “What if you’re just looking at it all wrong? I don’t think any of that means your wishes backfired. I think you always got what you wanted, or maybe just what you needed.”
“What do you mean? Of course they did. Did I mention that I wished for a cat that gave my whole family a very disgusting parasite? Or that I erased my own memory because I was trying to get over a guy. Or what about?—”
“ Maya ,” he cuts me off. “You might have this power, but you’re still human. Just because you have a wish come true doesn’t mean your life will be perfect. Life sucks, for everyone.” He chokes on this word, glances back at the wall of crosses. “There always has to be balance, that’s all it is. And I bet some of these things haven’t played out fully yet either.”
“But—”
“Isn’t being a world traveler half of your personality? I’m sure it was tough as a kid but you wouldn’t be the same person you are now if you hadn’t grown up that way. You would have never started Wander with Ellie. And good riddance to Ryan the fuckface. I’m glad you were able to get out of that relationship when you did. Otherwise you wouldn’t be here, with us. Ellie wouldn’t have had you these past few months. That wish was a blessing, no matter how much it hurt you.”
I mull over his words. A part of me wants to say that I know he’s wrong, but another part of me… “You really think that?”
“Go ahead, Maya. Make a wish. I have nothing but faith in you.” He opens his mouth but his next words don’t come, like they’re stuck in his throat. Tears well in his eyes and he grabs both of my hands. “Keep my family safe. Please?”