Chapter 7
EVER
While I war with myself on whether to tell Bobby the truth or give him a fictional version of it—oh God, I’m rationalizing a lie with the excuse that Gwen’s problem is fictional—Bobby waves the server over and asks for more water, cheese sticks, and a glass of sparkling cider.
“Cider?” Bubbly. Non-alcoholic. Good man.
“To celebrate more nights to come.”
“More nights?” I’m like a parrot, repeating his every word.
“I would like to see you again.”
“My brother’s rule. My shadow.”
“Make an exception. Ditch the shadow.”
“You’re asking me to be bad.”
“I’m asking you to take control of your life.”
He isn’t wrong. “Can I think about it?”
“No pressure, Ever. I never want to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do.”
“But you said you have rules for the women you see.”
“That’s different. The rules are so we’re on the same page.”
“What are they?”
“You give me full control in the bedroom. I glove up every time, and you must be on some form of birth control. No-strings sex but exclusive. Outside the bedroom, you want something, you give up something in return. If I break things off, we go full no contact. No exceptions.”
He’s asking me to take control of my life, yet if I see him again, he’ll be the one taking the reins. I’m exchanging one form of control for another, and I’m finding out that I am torn when it comes to this man.
Give in or resist? Live recklessly by breaking Ty’s rules and keeping Gage in the dark? Or continue life as is, living vicariously through my friends and the ups and downs of their latest relationship or their hang-ups on their crushes?
Something is going on with Gwen and Dare. Arie has a love-hate situationship with Riot. Riley and Midnight can’t decide whether their relationship is on or off. And I heard from Riley that Syn’s ex-boyfriend from high school just transferred in as DU’s starting quarterback.
That boy has balls.
No one transfers in and takes the starting position from the current starter without a battle of egos and a pissing match happening. I wish him much luck. Wish him more luck if he’s looking to reconnect with Syn, pronounced like sin. She hates jocks.
“What if I do the breaking up?” Riley and Syn had, at some point, broken up with Midnight and Taron, respectively.
“Won’t happen.”
“You’re that confident?”
“I am.”
I shrug, not too worried about these rules of his, because we will never happen. “I expected worse.”
“Like what?” He leans back with his arm resting along the top of the bench as he unbuttons the top three buttons of his shirt, giving me a hint of more ink and dark chest hair I would love to rub my fingers through.
Then I would rest my head in the crook of his neck and discreetly inhale his scent.
He would smell like soap, freshly washed clothes straight out of the dryer, and a musky male scent.
“Rules I expect from a no-exceptions kind of guy would be no kissing on the mouth. Too intimate. No PDAs. Too showy. But open for late-night booty calls and an NDA.”
“Ouch.” He rubs the spot over his heart. “Should I follow your rules, Ever?” With one arm still resting on the back of the bench, Bobby reaches for my hand, collapses it, and brings my knuckles to his mouth.
I watch, mesmerized, as he dips his head and grazes his teeth on my skin before he blows at the wetness he’s left behind. I tremble, imagining what his tongue and warm mouth could do to other parts of my body.
“They’re not my rules,” I stammer. “I made them up to make a point.”
“That there’s worse out there?”
“That your preference isn’t someone else’s.”
“Are you saying you’re fine with kissing, PDAs, late-night hookups, and NDAs?”
“Everything but the NDAs.”
He blows out a breath. “Thank the stars. I gotta have a taste of you.”
His words wet my already soaked panties. I squirm in my seat. He traps my sneaker between his shoes and plays footsie with me under the table. I laugh. This guy. He is sexy one minute and playful the next.
“Tell me why this week is your last at DU. Maybe I can help.”
“It’s complicated.”
“I understand complicated.”
I would love to prove to him how complicated my life is, but I’m running out of time.
Soon, Ty and the guys will realize I’m not in Dumas. They’ll come looking for me when Ty uses his phone app to get my location and find out I’m in a place I should never, ever step foot in. I quickly review in my mind the latest rom-com movies I’ve watched and find a plot I can use.
“I told my brother a small fib that I got into DU on scholarships and grants, but I had private funding that dried up at the end of my junior year. I have loans, but there’s a gap of five thousand.
I worked as many hours as I could, but I became sick and was in the hospital with bad pneumonia.
The hospital bill is huge. Some of it was forgiven.
I’m making payments on the rest. My emergency fund is depleted.
” I down my sparkling cider, wetting my parched mouth from the lies I’m telling.
“Payment is due by next Friday. If I don’t pay, I can’t continue with my major. ”
After graduation, I’ll find Bobby and tell him the truth. I owe it to him for listening.
“Can your brother help?”
“He’ll ask too many questions.”
“Is that so bad?”
“Yes. He’s persistent.”
“Persistence can be a good thing.”
“Not with my brother. He persistently uses my bad decisions as reasons to control my life more than he’s doing now. I can’t give him more ammunition.”
Why did I tell Bobby such a personal thing?
“Talking to you tells me your brother is a good guy. He has your safety and well-being in mind. He’ll understand.”
“He might understand, but he can’t help. His tattoo business isn’t doing well. I would hate to trouble him with money issues.” Another lie. Ty is booked for the next six months. “Do you know people file for bankruptcy because they can’t afford to pay their medical bills?”
“I had no idea. Did you write a report for a class? Is medicine your major?”
There’s genuine curiosity from Bobby, and I like it. Ty has never showed an interest in my classes. He’s after who I’m hanging out with and what kind of trouble I’ve gotten into lately. “Close. I’m pursuing a bachelor’s degree in recreational therapy.”
“Never heard of it.”
“You’re not alone.”
I finish the last of the mozzarella sticks and wipe my mouth with a napkin.
“RTs plan and coordinate treatment programs for people with injuries or disabilities. They’re like physical therapists but use creativity to stimulate the mind rather than working on the physical body.
I interned with one last summer, and taking the clients to sporting and community events was eye-opening.
It gets them out of their houses and connects them with the outside world. Isolation isn’t good for our minds.”
Carlos loved my plan. He understood how much music and dance helped me grow as a person and feel more connected to the world around me.
“DU is one of the few universities that offer the degree. I had to have a four-point-oh, send in three letters of recommendation, and go through a panel interview.”
“Fuck.”
“Yep.”
“I can’t let you throw your dreams away.”
“I’m sorry, but the dream is mine, not yours,” I remind him.
“Let me help.”
“How?”
Here’s where he comes up with a multitude of solutions. Many brains are better than one is my motto, and my brain is fried after writing a ton of essays using APA formatting.
“I’ll give you the money.”
That’s not the solution I was fishing for. “You can’t. You barely know me.”
“Then let me.”
“Let you what?” My brain isn’t following where he’s taking the conversation.
“Spend time with you.”
I shake my head. “Five thousand dollars for time with me is not an equal exchange. How about we start with a car wash, then maybe an auction for fancy pottery, or even better, time with you and some of your friends? Kind of like, win a date with a hottie, or hide and seek with a baddie?” I tip my chin in the direction of Gage’s lookalike, Mr. Snarly Face.
Bobby looks where I’m looking and ducks his head, his body shaking with his closed-mouth laughter.
Joy bursts through me, and I smile, unable to stop staring at his dark head of hair. Bobby is handsome and boyish looking when he does that, but underneath his clothing, he’s all man.
“How about it?” My voice comes out a little too out of breath for my liking, but being near this man . . . His large body and confident presence suck the air from around us, leaving me lightheaded.
Bobby lifts his head. “A car wash won’t bring in enough money. The auction won’t work either. I don’t have friends, Ever.”
I scoff. “That’s difficult to believe. You’re easy to talk to. You came right up to me, a stranger, and helped me feel like I belonged. I’m sure you have a lot of friends.”
He shrugs and says, “I’m a workaholic,” as though that sentence is the answer to all his problems.
My lame excuse for going out is similar, and I throw in, “I’m behind and have to study.”
Bobby toys with our napkins before sliding them to me. Wondering whether he feels as lonely as I do, even in a room full of people, I shape our napkins into two hearts. Except sitting here with him, I am more seen and alive than I’ve ever felt since Carlos’s death.
“When you say you want to spend time with me for 5K, how much time are you asking for?” I spell everything out so there are no misunderstandings.
“One day and one night.”
That’s it? “There’s a catch, isn’t there?”
“None. Unless you want more time with me. The ball is in your court.”
“By ‘with you,’ do you mean between the sheets?”
“Up to you.”
“I . . .” My gaze strays to his cupid’s bow, the luscious fullness of his lips, and the tan column of his neck. Dark, curly hair shows just above the open collar of his shirt. Can I resist wanting to stay with him longer than one day and one night after being in his sexy, charming presence?
I’m confident I can. “Are you sure it’s what you want?” I give Bobby a chance to back out and keep his pride. “I won’t think less of you if you change your mind. Five thousand is a lot for twenty-four hours with someone you don’t know.”
“The world needs someone like you.”
It doesn’t. I’ve been nothing but trouble for my brother, the crew, and my father. What the world needs more of is someone like Gwen, who forgave a stranger too easily for landing her brother in prison for five years.
“Let me do this for you, Ever.”
I think it over. The silence stretches on, and Bobby doesn’t fill it. Usually, someone in my friend group or the crew does. Instead, Bobby lets me breathe and think.
With the money in my account, I’ll head to the registrar’s office on Monday.
Skylar is on shift and can accept payment.
Then, I’ll draft a letter letting Gwen know that an alumnus has made a charitable gift and paid for the overdue tuition of five lucky seniors.
She can’t refuse what’s been done. Yes, that’s what I’ll do.
I agree. Bobby hands me his phone, and I put in my number. He sends me a text. My cell phone beeps. I enter him into my contacts as “B.”
“Do you have Greenback Wire?” he asks.
“I do.”
“What’s your username?”
“Promise you won’t laugh? I created the account when I was seventeen.”
“Cross my heart.” He mimes crossing his heart.
I give him my username. He ducks his head.
“Oh, fine, you can laugh,” I say, smiling.
He does, and I join him. ThatOneAwesomeDancer is a lame username, but back then, it was what I wanted to be the most, and Carlos helped make my wish come true. “What we do when we’re young, right?” I ask. What was Bobby like when he was younger? I bet he got all the girls.
“You speak as though you’re old.”
“Young age, old soul. That’s what my best friend said about me every chance he had.”
“He was very special to you.”
“He was.” Am I betraying my memories of Carlos by being with Bobby?
My phone pings.
“Money sent with extra for whatever your heart desires. Hold up your end of our agreement, Ever. I make the call, and there will be no denying me, understood?”
Am I making a deal with the devil, rather than the angel I believe Bobby to be?
Told you so. Ty’s voice in my head.
Shut it, Ty.
I give Bobby my word. “Indulge me before my ride turns into a pumpkin?” I’m not betraying Carlos. He said to live for him. That’s what I’ll do. I’ll dance in his honor and live. For him. My first love.
“Fairy tales? Happily ever after?”
I smile past the ache in my chest. “I don’t believe in fairy tales, but I do believe in fantasies.”
“What’s your fantasy, princess?” He pulls me close.
I stare into his gorgeous eyes and whisper over his lips, “Pretend to be the bad boy. My secret lover.”
“As you wish.”