Chapter 23
23
JARED
T he week had passed in a haze of frustration and simmering anger.
I was in purgatory, grumpy and snapping at anyone who dared to look in my direction.
It wasn’t exactly a new state of mind for me, but it felt more pronounced.
I felt off balance. The team was avoiding me, which was probably for the best. If my normal setting was abrasive , these days I was set to actively destructive .
Amelia’s sudden disappearance during the conference had hit me harder than I wanted to admit.
I’d taken it as a rejection, and I didn’t handle rejection well.
Not when it came to her.
I was the one that cut people loose, not the other way around.
They didn’t just love me and leave me.
It was a very strange feeling.
Even stranger because I felt like we had connected.
She wasn’t the type to just use me and never look back.
Not that I knew her all that well, but I felt like I knew her somewhat.
She had always seemed like a kindred spirit.
Then again, sex wasn’t exactly getting to know someone beyond the physical.
That’s why I liked it so much.
Usually. Amelia is different.
I do want to get to know her beyond the physical.
Being with her is different than being with any other woman.
I felt like we barely got the chance to scrape the surface.
She was there one minute and gone the next.
All I knew was that she’d asked for PTO, and that was it.
No explanation, no warning.
Just gone. I’d tried calling her a few times, but she hadn’t answered.
I’d left messages, but she hadn’t called back.
It was like she’d dropped off the face of the earth.
I didn’t know how to process that.
I stared at a stack of files on the corner of my desk.
I hadn’t touched them.
My mind was all over the place.
This wasn’t normal for me.
I was the guy that lived and breathed work.
Nothing ever distracted me.
Why couldn’t I be the cold, uncaring robot everyone accused me of being?
There was a knock on the edge of the door given it was wide open.
Clair was standing there like she was afraid to come in.
That wasn’t surprising given my mood all week.
“Yeah?” I asked, not bothering to hide my irritation.
“Your disposition is particularly pleasant today,” she said dryly and walked in.
“Did you have gravel for breakfast again?”
“You thought you’d stop by and let me know you don’t approve?”
“Yes, because I was thinking my day was going so well already, I may as well come over here and poke the bear.”
“Rough day?” I quipped.
“No. Yes. Doesn’t matter. Here are the files from my lab.” She put yet another stack on my desk.
“You asked for them yesterday.”
I nodded, barely glancing at them.
“Thanks.”
She hesitated, her eyes scanning my face.
“What?” I snapped.
“You look like hell, Jared.”
I scowled, leaning back in my chair.
“Thanks for the update, Clair. Anything else?”
She crossed her arms, her expression softening just a little.
“Amelia’s back.”
I froze, my heart skipping a beat.
“What?”
“She got in late last night,” Clair said.
“She’s in the lab right now. Back to work.”
I stared at her with several questions running through my head.
For one, why did she think that information would be important to me?
And two, why did she look like that was only one half of what she wanted to tell me?
“Really?” I said, keeping my expression neutral.
Amelia was back. And she hadn’t even bothered to let me know.
I felt a flicker of anger, but it was quickly overshadowed by something else—relief.
She was here. She was okay.
I had actually been worried about her.
Why? It wasn’t like she was under my care.
She wasn’t my girlfriend.
I wasn’t even sure we were friends.
Clair was still watching me.
That look of something big was still on her face.
I narrowed my eyes, leaning forward.
“What aren’t you telling me?”
She shook her head.
“It’s none of my business, Jared.”
I stood up, my patience wearing thin.
“When has that ever stopped you from talking?” I muttered.
“Hey, I’m not a gossip.”
“I didn’t say you were, but when there is something on your mind, you tend to express your opinion. It’s one of the reasons we get along. Clearly, you’ve got something you’re contemplating. I can’t fix it if you don’t tell me.”
“I don’t need you to fix anything,” she frowned.
“And I don’t think I appreciate you insinuating I need you to fix anything.”
I rolled my eyes.
These verbal sparring matches were lots of fun, but I was not in the mood.
“Clair, spill. What do you know?”
She hesitated, then sighed.
“I don’t know much. Just that she had to stay in Miami for a few days. Something about her mom.”
I frowned trying to remember her mentioning her mother.
I didn’t even know she had family in Miami.
I’d always assumed she was alone, like me.
I assumed her family was back in England.
But clearly, there was more to her story than I’d realized.
And who was to blame for that?
Me. I didn’t exactly ask a lot of questions.
“What about her mother?” I asked.
Once again, she looked like she would prefer to chew off her tongue than tell me what I needed to hear.
“I can’t.”
“Dammit, Clair, why say anything?”
“Because I think you should talk to her,” she said.
“She’s sad.”
“And you think I’m the guy she should talk to?” I asked with a laugh.
“I’m not sure we’ve met.”
She rolled her eyes.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, we have met. And this new compassionate side of you seems to only show up when her name is involved.” She moved to the door but turned back.
“Just for the record, Jared, some people might care about more than their own feelings.” She marched out, leaving me staring after her.
Amelia was back and already in the lab.
A hundred scenarios ran through my head.
What if she didn’t want to see me?
What if she did? Was I just going to barge in and demand answers?
My hand hovered over my phone.
Call her? Text her?
The hallways buzzed with activity, people rushing past with files and coffee cups, avoiding eye contact with me.
I caught a few curious glances as I walked past. They were probably wondering if they’d need to duck for cover.
I supposed that depended on how my conversation with Amelia went.
Each step closer heightened something inside me.
A combination of anticipation, dread, and hope all at once.
When I reached the lab, I hesitated outside.
I watched her through the glass wall for a few seconds.
Amelia stood at a bench in deep concentration, surrounded by equipment and charts that seemed chaotic but made perfect sense to people like us.
Her hair was pulled back hastily; she wore no makeup, as usual.
It hit me how much I’d missed her presence.
My mind was racing, my emotions a tangled mess.
I didn’t know what I was going to say to her, but I knew I couldn’t let this go.
Not again.
She looked beautiful.
And it only made me angrier.
I stormed into her office.
She jumped, her eyes widening in surprise as she turned to face me.
“Jared,” she said, her eyes wide with surprise.
“What are you?—”
Her research assistants were staring at us with wide eyes and curiosity.
“Excuse us,” I said, leaving zero room for questions.
They scrambled out of the lab.
I shut and locked the door and pushed the button to close all the internal blinds, plunging us into privacy.
I didn’t care if the little gossip queens talked.
“What are you doing, Jared?” Amelia asked.
I turned back to look at her.
Her hands were on her ample hips.
Her expression was colored with frustration, but beyond that, I saw exhaustion.
There were dark circles under her eyes, and she looked tired.
Like the kind of tired you get after fighting a war for years.
What was she fighting?
“Why did you leave?” I blurted out the question.
“Why did you disappear without a word? You checked out early and just… left. Why didn’t you call? Or answer any of my texts or phone calls?”
She blinked, like she was actually surprised I had questions.
“You have someone in Miami? A partner? A boyfriend? Someone who’s freeloading off your health insurance plan?”
Her eyes widened, and then her expression hardened.
“What are you talking about?”
“I saw the charges on your insurance. You have a dependent. Who is it?”
She crossed her arms and shot me a withering look.
“How’s Gemma, Jared? You two looked pretty cozy at dinner.”
She’d seen us.
She’d come back to the hotel, seen me with Gemma, and left.
That’s why she’d disappeared.
I was both relieved and irritated.
She did care. She was jealous.
“You came back,” I said.
“Yes, I came back,” she snapped.
“I was supposed to be at the dinner, remember? No, you probably didn’t remember because you were clearly distracted.”
“Nothing is going on with Gemma,” I said with a shake of my head.
“And there won’t be anything going on with Gemma. You could have just said something instead of running away for a week.”
“I didn’t run away.”
“Why would you think I was with Gemma?” I asked.
“She’s the worst. I mean, she’s a decent surgeon but a terrible human being.”
“I saw you,” she said.
“I have eyes. I know what I saw.”
“No, you don’t,” I assured her.
“It was dinner. We weren’t alone. We were in a room full of people. She just happened to be there.”
She shook her head.
“Whatever. It’s not like what happened between us meant anything to you, right? Just a one-night stand. That’s how you roll. I get it. Just don’t come in here demanding answers to questions you have no business asking.”
“You think I have no business asking?” I took a step closer.
I stared at her, my mind reeling.
Just a few days ago, I’d been thinking the same thing.
But seeing her again, standing here in front of me, had me questioning everything.
I didn’t know what I wanted, but I knew one thing for sure: I wasn’t ready to let her go.
“Jared, I work here,” she said.
“That’s it. What happened, it probably shouldn’t have, but I’m not holding you to anything. There’s no reason for us to pretend things are anything but what they are. I am not looking for anything. I don’t have the energy.”
The more she talked, the more I wanted her.
My gaze dropped to her mouth.
How was I supposed to just walk away from this woman?
I took a step closer to her.
She frowned, dropping her hands from her hips.
There was a flash of concern in her eyes.
“What are you doing?” she whispered.
Before she could say anything, I kissed her, pressing her against the wall.
She gasped, her hands flying to my chest like she was going to push me away, but then she leaned into the kiss.
It was raw, intense, and everything I’d been craving since that night in the hotel.
I didn’t know what this meant, or where we were going, but I knew one thing for sure: I wasn’t ready to let her go.
I couldn’t get enough of her.