Chapter 11 Weston
WESTON
Ipaced the length of my office, the black walls and walnut furniture shrouded by the night and lack of power.
My laptop screen glowed from where it sat on my desk.
Upon leaving the break room and coming in here, I hit the power button on it, drawing it out of its bottomless slumber for a shred of light.
I brought my hand up to my face and ran it over my chin. I could still taste her on my lips, on my fucking tongue. The sweetness that existed between Olivia’s legs was now a part of me, sinking deeper into my goddamn flesh and turning me into a madman.
Because I wanted more than what I got.
Despite how wrong it was, and the shit I’d have to do to right my actions, my body bustled with enough energy to light this place for the next week. It traveled up my legs, making my muscles ache in a way that forced one foot in front of the other until I couldn’t stand it anymore.
Eventually, I rounded my desk and dropped into my seat with a heavy sigh, eyes locked on the coding program on my laptop screen.
The same one I spent so many of my days working in.
My email app wasn’t far south. It had its very own spot on the taskbar, that red circle indicating I had another new message demanding my attention.
I ignored it. I couldn’t fucking deal with that right now.
Not after what happened.
Not after spending the last few hours trapped with Olivia, every ounce of me twisted in a painful war against having her and not being allowed to touch her.
She was my little brother’s girlfriend, for fuck sake.
There was no valid excuse that would justify me putting my mouth on her.
The facts were simple, and while they might have sounded like an excuse, they were no less true. My life was days away from turning into complete chaos. And nobody knew it. Not even Lennon. I was purposeful in keeping it close to my chest in efforts to not hurt those around me.
And yet, look what happened, anyway.
When Lennon found out what the hell Olivia and I got up to tonight, he’d blow a gasket.
And it’d be worse than all those years ago when I told his at-the-time girlfriend that he was running around on her.
Back then, I was the chivalrous bastard that wanted the truth printed on the biggest damn billboard.
I wasn’t the same person now.
My good intentions were muddled, the white that once casted itself over my choices faded into a slate gray.
I was filled with a messiness that rivaled Sharpie scribbled on walls.
The shit I was keeping to myself couldn’t be undone or reversed.
It was a bleach stain on a brand new navy linen towel, easily seen but impossible to fix.
Everyone knew the only way around either was to replace what’d been ruined.
Unfortunately, that was a lot easier with inanimate objects than human error. My fuck up couldn’t be erased. It couldn’t be ripped out or thrown away. It couldn’t be expunged with the click of the backspace button.
I couldn’t open a program, move around a few numbers and letters and create something totally different.
My dark truths were there to stay. There to burn their way deeper and deeper into my flesh and bone.
The truth was, they were rewriting my code.
Infringing upon my DNA and turning me into something else entirely.
Like the kind of person who fucked around with his only brother’s girlfriend.
I pushed the thought away, even though I knew it was impossible for it to go away completely, and scooted closer to my desk where I had set up my laptop when I came in.
Thankfully, it was still charged from the last time I used it.
Only when it died would I call it a night and head home, providing the power wasn’t back on by then.
I pulled it closer and reviewed the program I was so familiar with—the same one I used on a daily basis to run security code for our camera systems.
The digits on the screen called out to me, steadying the rhythm of my heartbeat and shooing away the thoughts that hammered their way into my subconscious.
It took seconds to get lost in it and nearly forget where I was.
That the power was still out and rain continued to slide down the stretch of windows on the far wall of my office.
And then the briefest noise caught my attention—a click—that triggered a spark of curiosity.
I lifted my gaze, looking over at my open door.
It took a second for my eyesight to adjust from my computer screen, but once it did, my body sang out in whispered satisfaction that not many people in my life triggered.
Olivia’s outline stood at the threshold, her hands linked together at her stomach. I could smell her from across the room, that’s how fucking in tune and desperate I was for her. Her scent was flowery and sweet like honey—my favorite goddamn sweetener of all.
Nothing artificial compared to it.
Nothing ever would.
Irritation billowed from within me and took hold. Because as much as I wanted her here, I also didn’t.
It’d been hard enough all these months to keep my distance.
What the hell was I supposed to do when she was willingly encroaching upon my space?
I couldn’t push her away. I already did that, and I couldn’t do it again.
We were in this new, weird territory now, which meant I had to acknowledge her. Even if I knew it’d ruin me.
“What are you still doing here?” I snipped out, hating how harsh my words sounded.
“It’s nice to see you again, too,” she replied, that sarcasm laced in her tone. She had no problem giving it back to me and putting me in my place.
My heart picked up speed, thumping against my ribcage with each step she made as she walked over, rounding the edge of my desk to stand in front of me.
I held onto the armrests of my chair to keep myself from reaching out. “I wish I could say the same.”
It was the wrong thing to say, even if it was a little bit true. That quick, she swiveled on her foot and moved away from me. Those few feet felt like miles. I must have been a masochist, because even while knowing this wasn’t—couldn’t—go any further, I darted up from my chair and reached out.
My hand curled around her arm, her skin wet from the rain.
My fingertips pressed into her soft flesh in a squeeze before slowly slipping down to her wrist and then her hand.
I weaved my fingers through hers and brought my other hand up to her hip, holding her steady.
Holding her in place. Holding her to me.
Because I wasn’t ready for her to walk away.
Not yet.
“Wait,” I breathed out, inhaling her honeyed hair. I closed the space that existed between us, knowing how damn dangerous it was being so close to her. My brother could walk in on us at any time. “Where’s Lennon? He did pull the car up for you, didn’t he?”
“Yes,” she murmured, “but then he left.”
My hand tightened around her fingers. When she turned her head to the side, her hair tickling my nose for a split second, my body eased the tiniest bit.
She was so good for me she was bad. I knew it down to my damn core.
Still, I said. “What do you mean, he left?”
“I mean,” she said, “he went home.”
“You’re being vague, and I don’t like it. I need to know what’s going on, Olivia. I need to know if the possibility exists that he’s going to walk his ass back in here and find my hands on you.”
She huffed out an annoyed breath. “Did you not hear what I said?” A beat lingered. “He left, Weston. He went home. He’s not going to find you in a compromising position. It wouldn’t matter, anyway.”
“You know it would,” I told her, my voice low.
“I broke up with him.”
My breath caught in my throat, and my heart skipped a beat. Both of my hands fell from her, dropping to my sides. Her news was a bucket of ice-cold water down my back. “You told me you weren’t going to do that tonight.”
“Yeah, well…” She turned on her heel, facing me. She was a good few inches shorter, but that didn’t matter. It changed nothing. Certainly didn’t take away from the fact that there was something about her that called out to me. “I decided I didn’t want to put it off any longer.”
“Jesus Christ, Olivia,” I hissed. “You really know how to time things, don’t you?”
“So we’re back to that, then?”
“Back to what?”
She scoffed. “Back to you spitting your vicious words at me. Back to talking down to me. Back to being a complete and utter jerk.”
I walked around my desk, needing space. “Hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but I never stopped being an asshole. I’m no different now than I was three hours ago.”
“Unbelievable,” she huffed out. “I came back in here to see you because I couldn’t…
I can’t ignore whatever this tension is between us.
It’s there. I feel it, and I know you do, too.
What we did back there… That wasn’t fair to Lennon.
But it’s also not right for us to continue to ignore something that is very, very obvious. ”
I spun around, my hand clenched in a fist. I brought it up and hit my chest, this unknown fury and frustration coursing through me.
“I’m not Lennon, Olivia! You are not going to find in me what you saw in him.
I’m not the kind, noble Taylors brother.
I’m on the opposite side of the goddamn Earth while everyone else is experiencing summer.
I’m in the area that is covered in shadows and frigid ice. ”
“I’m not afraid of the dark, Weston. Or the cold.”
I chewed on the insides of my cheeks, hating the way those words felt a lot like an embrace. I ground out, “You should be. You don’t find anything good in the darkness, Olivia. It’s a cold, damp place with little life. There’s nothing here that’s going to help you thrive.”
She stepped closer. “Turns out, I’m not much of a green thumb. The last three succulents I owned, I killed.”