Chapter 22
22
Cate and Natalie strolled across the Rialto Bridge side by side, backs to the camera. The morning’s shoot was over; Natalie no longer had to worry about whether a shadow was creating a double chin effect nor whether the camera was zooming in on the fine hairs above her top lip. Presenting wasn’t as much fun as Natalie remembered; perhaps she’d been less self-conscious in the days of Panda’s Place .
Despite Phil’s temporary absence, the Venice leg of the series was shaping up nicely. Cate was the perfect, camera-friendly contestant. The backdrop of the palazzo, not to mention the city itself, was advertising catnip and was certain to send their viewing figures soaring. The only thing preying on Natalie’s mind was the fizzing out of her evening with Eraldo. Trying not to dwell on it was as futile as wishing she had Mandy Miller’s natural warmth and charm.
‘That is all for today.’ Lucia glanced at her clipboard for confirmation, though she doubtless had the entire fortnight’s schedule committed to memory.
‘Thanks, Cate, you did a great job,’ Natalie said.
‘No problem, it was fun.’ Cate smoothed her hair back, sending a waft of Chanel perfume Natalie’s way. Today, she’d teamed a blush-pink blouse with an elegant pencil skirt and a dotty scarf tied just-so at the neck: a look that would scream cut-price air hostess if ever Natalie tried to emulate it.
‘We are so lucky you persuaded the crew to take the rest of the day off and add a little time on at the end, Lucia. It will make it much less of a rush once Phil is here,’ Natalie said. ‘Poor fellow, it can’t be fun being stuck at that airport hotel all day but at least he’s not sleeping on the departure-lounge floor.’
‘It is such a shame we could not book him on a flight today but he will be here by tomorrow evening,’ Lucia said. ‘Now you are free to explore our city. You are two old friends, so this will be fun for you, sì ?’
‘Yes. It’s so lucky we found each other again.’ Cate’s voice was genuine.
Natalie held back responding in kind; she didn’t want Cate to think her apology had been accepted so readily. Instead, she just said, ‘It’s going to be a lovely day.’ It was already warm, the sky the colour a paint company might suggest for a little boy’s room.
‘Then I will leave you to enjoy your day.’ Lucia turned to the director, speaking in Italian.
‘Well?’ Cate said.
‘Coffee next.’ Natalie used her most decisive voice.
It didn’t take them long to find a little place with empty tables to be had. It was still early; the day trippers had yet to descend on the city. The café’s chairs were comfortable: rattan with round, red cushions secured to the seats and backs. Natalie stretched out her legs, the tension of the last few days beginning to drift away like stray strands of seaweed in the canal’s green waters.
Cate didn’t seem so comfortable, sitting ramrod straight as if afraid that the red cushion’s vivid colour might rub off on her blouse if she leant back against it.
‘Are you okay, Cate? You aren’t worrying about Phil getting here, are you? I can’t imagine anything else can go wrong.’
‘Of course not. Third time lucky!’
Natalie ignored Cate’s super-bright tone. ‘There’s no point worrying; there’s nothing you or I can do.’
‘I know.’ Cate picked up her teaspoon, seemed to examine her reflection in its tiny bowl and put it down again. ‘It’s not that… I was wondering about today… if you had any thoughts about what we should do.’
‘We could take a boat trip out to Torcello. That’s one of the lagoon islands we won’t get to film on.’
‘Do you remember our trip to Murano where they make the glass? Julie Paine blew bubble gum balloons every time that fellow blew into his great long pipe.’ Cate laughed.
‘Shy Kelly bought that turquoise glass turtle for her mum and dropped it on the boat on the way back. She wouldn’t stop crying.’
‘Honestly, what a drama! Things seemed so important back then when really we had nothing to worry about.’
Natalie didn’t reply. She waved for the bill.
‘Oh, I am sorry. I didn’t mean…’
‘It’s okay.’ There was no point making Cate feel any worse.
‘Nat…’
‘What?’
‘Could we take the waterbus out to a different island? I want to go to Burano.’
‘The one where they have all the colourful houses? It’s already on our itinerary.’ Natalie fished out her phone along with her purse to pay for the coffee. ‘Yep, we’re filming there in a few days’ time.’
‘I want to go there today.’ Cate’s voice was strange; all traces of her adopted ‘to the manor born’ confidence had vanished. ‘I need to go to Burano before Phil gets here but I don’t want to go alone. You will come with me, won’t you?’
‘Sure. We can stroll up to the Fondamente Nuove and get a boat to the island from there. Why do you want to go?’
Cate’s eyes flicked from side to side. She snapped open the catch on her bag, removed a scrap of brown paper held together with sticky tape and smoothed it out on the table.
‘What’s this?’ Natalie peered at the blurred ink.
Cate’s forefinger stroked the curvy script. ‘It’s an address on Burano. The house where my mother, Lina, lives.’
‘So, you’re in touch now; that’s fantastic!’
‘No, we’re not.’ Cate’s voice was bleak.
‘You’re not? After all this time, why not? Were you worried about upsetting your dad?’
Cate gave a strange sort of snort. ‘Hardly. He wasn’t worried about upsetting me.’
Natalie hastily ordered two more coffees from the confused waiter who’d appeared holding the card reader. Never mind the extra caffeine, she and Cate weren’t going anywhere. Not until she’d got to the bottom of this.
‘Why then? What’s the big mystery?’
Cate sighed. ‘I used to fantasise about meeting Mum, you know. I imagined her living in a grand palace or castle in some faraway place with a big doll’s house in a pink bedroom just waiting for me. When Dad confessed he’d always known where she was, I wanted to get straight back on a plane. But I was just a school kid; how could I have afforded to get the money for a ticket? Dad wasn’t going to give it to me, that’s for sure, even if he’d had any spare cash, which he didn’t.’
‘But that’s hardly a problem now.’ Natalie glanced pointedly at Cate’s handbag.
‘No. Of course, you’re right, that’s not the reason. And even at uni, I could have lived on beans and gone to Italy. It’s just…’
Natalie waited, glad that the swift arrival of the coffee gave her something to do other than watch Cate shifting awkwardly on her chair, playing with her gem-studded stacking rings.
‘Dad and I never moved; he stayed in that council house where he and Mum lived until he had to go into the nursing home. He wouldn’t even budge after I married Phil. He said he didn’t want our charity. Mum knew where I was. She knew exactly where to find me. She could have come back to see me any time. Dad couldn’t have stopped her. Not if she really wanted to.’
‘Oh, Cate.’ Natalie’s heart went out to her. ‘There could be any number of reasons why she didn’t come back.’
‘Dad never really explained why Mum went. I always thought they’d had a row and he’d told her to leave. I wish I’d pushed him for answers back then, but the way he is now, it’s too late. Now I’m here, it feels like I’ve got to find out. But I’m scared. Scared that she won’t want to see me.’
‘What does Phil say about all this?’
‘I haven’t told him. I don’t want to tell him unless she wants to see me.’
‘Doesn’t he think it’s strange you’d come to Venice and not try to visit her?’
Cate chewed her lip. A couple sat down at the empty table next to them, dropping their shopping bags at their feet, discussing what they would and wouldn’t have to drink whilst the waiter hovered. Natalie waited.
Eventually, Cate mumbled, ‘He doesn’t know she’s still alive.’
‘You told him she was dead?’ Natalie’s voice came out a little louder than she intended. The women on the next table, who’d finally decided on nothing more exciting than a couple of caffè latte s, turned and stared.
‘Not exactly. I just never corrected him when he assumed that was the reason I’d never tried to make contact.’
‘But why?’ Natalie asked, dropping her voice this time.
‘Phil’s always got on with his folks; he struggles to understand why I didn’t make up with Dad. I always get the impression he thinks it’s a bit of a character failing though he’d never say so. He knows Mum left when I was a baby but when I told him she was no longer around, he misinterpreted what I said and it just seemed easier not to correct him. I knew he’d be nagging me to go and find her and I didn’t know if I could. Phil’s parents doted on him. His dad’s passed away but his mum’s house is full of family pictures. She’s even still got one of his first day at school up on the mantelpiece looking all shy in his cap and a blazer that was way too big for him. I don’t want him dwelling on why Mum left. I didn’t want him or my boys to see me as someone damaged and unlovable.’
Natalie instinctively touched her old school friend’s soft hand. ‘I’m sure whatever the truth is about your mum, it wouldn’t affect how your family think of you.’
‘Maybe you’re right but if Mum rejects me, I couldn’t bear Phil to know.’
‘This has been haunting you, hasn’t it?’ She couldn’t imagine what Cate had been going through. Natalie had always taken her own mum and dad’s love for granted; she supposed most people did.
Cate nodded. She looked close to tears. ‘I’ve been terrified of the thought of sneaking off by myself. You will come with me, won’t you? There’s no one else I can ask.’
‘Of course. We’ll go now.’ Natalie rooted in her purse to find some cash; she was too impatient to wait for the waiter to go off and fetch the card reader.
Cate picked up her bag, her second coffee untouched.
‘Are you okay, Cate? Are you sure you want to do this?’
‘Yes… but you won’t put any of this in the programme, will you? Promise me.’
‘Of course not, don’t worry. Together At Last is a completely different show.’ Flo-Go’s other production specialised in heartwarming family reconciliations. The stories that ended in slammed doors and shattered dreams didn’t make the screen. That wasn’t what the gene-testing company who sponsored the show wanted their viewers to see.
Natalie forced a big smile. ‘Everything will work out, you’ll see.’