Chapter 38
38
Theo
L orenzo invites us to a gala that night. It’s a pre-race party, and the world’s elite are gathered in Lorenzo’s palatial seaside home. He lives just outside of Monaco, on the part of the coastline that belongs to France. The house is perched on a cliff, with terraced gardens, a hidden pool, and swaying palms. I tuck Cat into my side as we exit the limo. She’s wearing the pink dress, and she looks absolutely delicious. Soft and kissable, if a little uncertain.
“Nervous?” I murmur. “We won’t know anyone here.”
“I’m worried we’ll be caught,” she says. “I hate lying.” A uniformed man opens the door to the opulent home.
“We’ll be fine.” I run my fingers over her arm, and she shivers.
“This is amazing,” Lane says in an awed tone. “Maybe I should try to act casual, but I can’t. I need to take photos. Cat, want to join me?”
They head off for the terrace, and I’m stuck in the ballroom with Miles, who looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.
Jonah is already leading Callie to the bar, his eyes only for her. Miles watches them go with a faint smile .
“Never thought I’d see the day,” he says with a tilt of his head toward our friend.
“You sound like a satisfied mother hen,” I say.
Miles snorts. “I’m happy. Is it so terrible to want the same for my friends?”
“I suppose not.” I scan the room, looking for Lorenzo. He’s in the corner with his wife, talking to a few younger couples.
“You think he’ll invest?” I ask, tipping my head toward him.
“I’m not sure,” Miles says slowly. “I think he likes toying with us. With you. And my patience is running low.”
Mine too, but I’m paid to keep things easy, not rile my partners up. “You sound like Jonah,” I say.
Miles grins at me. “How’s it going with Cat?” he asks.
“You’re a nosy bastard,” I say lightly.
“And you’re keeping secrets,” he says.
I take a glass of wine from a passing caterer. “What makes you say that?” I ask, looking back at my friend.
“Because there’s this look in your eye when you watch her. Like you’re desperate.”
“Fuck.”
“It’s okay—”
“No. It’s very much not.” I take a gulp of wine, barely tasting it. “I feel like I’m sliding deeper and deeper into a pit. Every time I try to claw myself out, I end up farther in.”
“What’s happening?” Jonah strolls up.
“I’m falling for my wife,” I say bleakly.
Miles’s brows go up. “Glad we’re being honest now.”
“She’s not falling for me,” I respond. We’re doing the list, and I’m helping her, and we’re faking it really well, because, for me, it’s not fucking fake. I drain the drink. A class act, that’s me. I look around for another waiter.
Jonah raises a single brow, a motion that comes more naturally to him than breathing. “I thought you didn’t like her.”
“I was wrong. There’s a good heart under all her prickliness. She wants to save her family company and do right by its employees. She gave her friend half the bar. And yet…” I swallow. “It would have to be a hell of a lot of change to overcome the past.”
“You knew this would happen,” Miles says quietly.
“Yeah,” I say roughly, watching Cat beyond the doors as she laughs with Lane, looking happier than I’ve seen her for a long time. Callie wanders out, and Lane gives her a kiss on the cheek that makes her squirm and push Lane away.
“So go after her,” Jonah says, shrugging. Miles cuts him a look.
“It’s not that simple,” I say. “Cat has never wanted me. Not the way I want her.”
“Maybe she’s changed,” Miles says.
“Or maybe she hasn’t, and she’s going to ruin me.”
I don’t repeat my words from last week. It never lasts with me. It started with Cat, the first woman to reject me, and it ended a week before Cat and I got married, with a woman whose name I never learned. Shame rises inside me, a tide of mortification I can’t shove down and I can’t drown with alcohol.
Even if Cat did want me, I’m not good enough for her.
“If you don’t pursue her, you might regret it forever,” Jonah says. He’s watching the women too. “Can you live with that?”
I’m saved from responding by a loud “Theo, darling.” The accent is posh and familiar.
I turn immediately.
Shit. Saved is the wrong word.
The voice belongs to Katrina Jasper, the wife of an investor we’re courting for a property development. Her husband hasn’t invested yet, and it’s Katrina’s opinion that matters most. I’ve been to plenty of dinners with her. Enough to know that her nails feel like daggers on my thigh and that after two martinis, she starts to make suggestions about getting out of here. She’s the last person I want to talk to.
She goes for a cheek kiss, and I respond a second too late. I should have shaken her hand and prevented this. She always lingers a little too long. Her perfume makes my eyes water as she pulls back. She’s standing too close, looking at me like I’m a piece of meat. My gaze darts. Her husband has pulled Miles and Jonah away .
“It’s so good to see you,” she purrs. “You’re looking well. You always did fill out a tux so nicely.”
“That’s what they say,” I tell her with a wink. This is my role. The devil-may-care playboy. The guy who responds with a laugh and a smile, even when I feel like I’m being suffocated.
“We never did have that drink in Paris,” she says. Her eyes flicker with avarice. For my money or my body, I’m not sure.
“You wanted to talk about the potential investment in SunTech, right?” I know damn well she didn’t, but for once, I’d like someone to take me seriously.
“Among other, more interesting things. Come on, Theo.” She laughs, a fake tinkling sound. “I know you’re not into all that.”
“Into what?” I’m not playing my part, but I can’t bear to. It would be a relief if the ground opened right now and swallowed me.
“Business.” She winks. “I know it’s just for show for you. You have your business partners for all that. That leaves you able to focus on more…earthly pursuits.” She smiles. I’m sure she thinks it’s alluring, but all I see are sharp white incisors and lips the color of blood.
This is what they think of me.
I look past her to where her friend is staring at us, whispering to another woman. The weight of their gazes presses into me. I’m going to lose it. I want to run. I could leave right now and never do this again, and fuck , Jonah and Miles would be so disappointed. I swallow hard and cover it with a sip of wine.
She puts her hand on my chest. I freeze, my gaze lifting to hers. This can’t be happening. Just a foot from her husband, and she’s coming on to me. She’s touching me. I’m going to be sick.
“Hello, darling,” Cat says. Her hand slips into mine, and she leans into me. An anchor. I stiffen. Cat shouldn’t have to bear witness to this.
Cat’s eyes lower to Katrina’s hand before she slowly tilts her head. “Have we met?” Cat sips her champagne like this woman wasn’t just fondling me.
“I’m afraid not. Katrina Jasper. And you are?” Katrina raises a brow, like she doesn’t think Cat could be competition for her .
“His wife.”
Cat smiles sweetly and places her hand on my chest, right where Katrina’s was. The diamond is so large that it’s twisted to the side of her finger. I know she might hate that stupid ring, but I’ve never been more grateful for it.
“You’re married? I can’t believe—” Katrina shakes her head. “You know he’s been with half the women at this party, right?” She smiles sharply, like she just won a point. Each word is a bullet.
“Practice,” Cat says with a calm smile. “For me.”
“You’re not bothered?” Katrina asks.
“Why would I be bothered?” Cat’s brow wrinkles. “The way I see it, he had his pick of everyone, and he still chose me.”
Shock keeps me rooted in place. Cat is magnificent. She hates public confrontations. She’d never defend herself like this, but for me, she’ll go to war.
She’s not the woman I thought she was.
The thought pings through me, settles in my veins.
I’m falling for her, and she will never, ever choose to be with me.
Fuck.