Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-Three
Lennix
Iwould have been lying if I said I wasn’t nervous as Raylan guided his truck up my parents’ drive. I was a nervous freaking wreck. My stomach was a tangled mess, my heart was beating faster than was safe, and I couldn’t get my palms to stop sweating.
“Relax, baby.” Raylan reached over the center console and placed his hand on my knee, giving it a squeeze. “It’s all gonna be okay. You’ll see.”
I didn’t know how the hell he figured that.
My brother had lost his freaking mind when he walked into my house and caught Raylan and me kissing.
The only reason it hadn’t come to blows was because Rae was with him and put herself between my brother and my boyfriend.
I’d attempted to do the same, but Raylan had shoved me behind him, determined to protect me—like I was the one who needed it.
He’d stormed out shortly after, not giving either of us a chance to explain.
Then I’d gotten a group text from my mother, summoning everyone to my parents’ house, and I couldn’t help but feel like I was in for some sort of reckoning.
“How can you say that? Raylan, he lost his shit. I’ve never seen him turn that shade of red before.”
Raylan threw his truck into park then killed the engine before twisting in his seat to face me.
He took my chin in his hand and guided me to look at him.
“Baby, it’ll be okay because I love you and you love me.
Your brother can be as mad as he wants, but it won’t affect how we feel about each other.
As long as we have each other, we can get through anything. ”
I reverted to my default setting of smart ass whenever my emotions were feeling really big. “You know, for a guy who had his head shoved up his ass for way too long, you’re surprisingly good at this whole boyfriend thing.”
He gave me that crooked, dimpled smile that I adored. “You say the sweetest things. If you don’t stop, you’ll make me blush.”
Despite the fact that my brother was right inside, probably planning out exactly how he intended on killing the man I loved, I couldn’t help but smile. “What can I say, I’m a romantic like that.”
His face grew serious. “I love you. No matter what happens, just remember that, and everything else will work itself out.”
“I love you too.”
I caught movement from the corner of my eye and turned to see that my mother had stepped onto the front porch, her expression inscrutable as she watched us through the windshield.
I huffed out a wary sigh. “Guess we better get this over with.”
I reached for the handle, but was stopped by Raylan squeezing my thigh. “Stay there. I’ll get it.”
My heart flipped in my chest, a cheesy grin taking over my face as he rounded the back of his truck and opened my door for me.
He helped me out, then laced his fingers through mine and held on tight, offering his silent support as we moved up the stairs together.
As soon as I was within reach, my mother took my face in her hands and stared into my eyes.
I wasn’t sure what she was searching for, but after a few tense, heavy seconds, a brilliant smile lit her face.
“There she is,” she whispered, and I got the distinct impression she was talking to herself. Then to me, she said, “Yeah, you’re going to be just fine, honey.”
Before I could ask what she meant, she moved on from me and pulled Raylan down so she could press a kiss on his cheek. “Welcome to the family officially, son. Cord and I have your back in there.”
I looked up in time to see Raylan’s throat work on a thick swallow, his eyes rimmed with emotion. “Thank you, ma’am.”
My mom turned back to me, her face growing serious. “Take it easy on your brother, okay? He can feel really big, and sometimes he doesn’t know how to handle it, but you know him, and you know that he’ll eventually see reason. All he wants is your happiness.”
I couldn’t speak past the lump that had swelled in my throat, so I simply nodded.
“All right, then. Let’s get this done.”
Raylan and I followed her into the house I’d grown up in, and as the comforts of my childhood home surrounded me, I was grateful to my parents for insisting we do this here.
It was a safe place for both my brother and me.
Raylan was steady beside me, his hand firm and unwavering in mine as we crossed into the living room.
My father gave me a tender smile from his place resting against the wall, and Rae was sitting on the couch, anxiously fiddling with her fingers.
Her smile was wobbly, but I could see the happiness she felt for me through the worry in her eyes.
Zach was pacing the room like a caged animal, and as soon as he spotted us, his eyes narrowed on a vicious glare.
“Get your goddamn hands off my sister, you piece of shit.”
“Zach!” I snapped, my own anger rising to the surface.
I dropped Raylan’s had so I could step forward and go toe-to-toe with my brother.
I couldn’t exactly get in his face since I was a foot shorter than he was, but what I lacked in height, I made up for in attitude.
“You do not get to talk to him like that. Ever. Do you understand me? If you have an issue with us being together, we can talk it out like adults, but I won’t stand here and let you insult him.
Especially when he hasn’t done anything to deserve it. ”
My brother let out a guffaw of disbelief. “Not done anything to deserve it?” he spat in bewilderment. “Are you fuckin’ kidding me? He’s been screwing my sister behind my back!”
“First off, what’s happening between us is so much more than what you insultingly whittled it down to. And second, who I sleep with is absolutely none of your business!”
He crossed his arms over his chest and glared down at me with indignation.
“It absolutely is my business when you’re making terrible decisions like this.
” He threw his hand out to indicate Raylan.
“The guy’s a man whore. Jesus, Lenni, I thought you were supposed to be smarter than this.
I didn’t think you’d be dumb enough to fall for his brand of bullshit. ”
Okay, that one hurt, but before I could lash out, Raylan’s arm banded around my waist, and I was yanked behind him faster than I could blink.
Unlike me, he was able to go eye-to-eye with my brother, and based on what I could see of his profile, he’d officially reached the same level of pissed off as Zach. Suddenly I was worried about bloodshed.
“Never again.” His voice was so low and menacing that a shiver worked its way over my spine.
“You want to insult me go for it. Hate me all you want, but that is the first and last time you talk to your sister like that. I want your acceptance, I want you to be happy for us, because I love her more than you can possibly know, but if I ever hear you call her dumb again, or anything else that could hurt her feelings, I’ll knock your goddamn teeth down your throat. You hear me?”
Oh shit.
Zach pushed in closer, his mouth a snarl as he hissed. “You don’t love her. You don’t know the fucking meaning of that word. You’re only using her to get your dick wet, and as soon as you get tired of her, you’ll toss her aside just like you’ve done with every other woman that came before her.”
“Zachary Paulson!” At Rae’s shrill yell, we all turned her way.
She’d shot up to her feet, her hands fisted at her side and murder gleaming in her eyes.
“I knew you could be stupid sometimes, but I forgave it because you’re a man, and men can be dumb more often than not, but I’ve never known you to be cruel.
You keep this up and you won’t be sleeping on the couch; I’ll throw your ass into the barn! ”
He looked stricken at her threat. “Hollywood—” he started, but before he could get any further, I rounded Raylan, putting myself between him and my brother.
I didn’t bother to mask the pain his words had caused, and the instant he saw it written on my face, he flinched like he’d just been slapped, the color draining from his cheeks.
“Zach, I love you with everything I have. You’ve always been the best brother, at least until right now.
” I couldn’t keep the wobble out of my voice.
My chin trembled and my eyes welled with sadness.
“You’re breaking my heart,” I whispered.
“Lenni, sweetheart—”
I held my hand up to stop him. “I love him, Zach. And when I say that, I mean I’ve loved him for more than half my life.
I know exactly who he is, and so do you.
We know his character. We know his heart.
And we both know he’s a good man. Knowing those things is precisely why I love him.
How you feel about us being together is never going to change that.
I’ll choose him over and over again, because it’s only ever been him.
” I heard Raylan suck in a gasp behind me, but I couldn’t turn to look.
I had to get this out before it tore me apart inside.
“I want nothing more than for you to support this relationship, but believe me when I tell you, even if you don’t, I’ll still be with him.
But it would kill a little piece inside me. ”
“Oh, sweetheart.” Zach looked ravaged as he stared down at me, his forehead pinched with sadness. “You don’t understand.”
“Then explain it to me,” I pleaded. “Because the last thing I want is to lose my brother.”
Then he proceeded to gut me . . . in the very best way.
“My life started the day I met Mom and Dad, but you have to understand, I didn’t really learn the meaning of true, unconditional love until the day you were born.
I’m talking the kind of love where I’d gladly give my life for yours.
When you were born, I made a promise to myself that I would do everything in my power to make sure you never got hurt.
I never wanted you to go through anything like I did, and I’ve spent every day since you were born, worried that I’d fall down on the job, and wouldn’t be there to protect you when you needed me.
I couldn’t live with myself if I ever failed you like that. ”
I lost the fight with my tears and let them stream down my cheeks unchecked as I lunged for my brother, wrapping my arms around him, hugging as tightly as I possibly could.
A single sob broke free when he squeezed me back.
This was the brother I’d always known. The one who could heal most anything with nothing more than one of his incredible bear hugs.
“You’re the best big brother a girl could ask for,” I sniffled, holding him for another second before pulling away.
“But you can’t protect me from being hurt.
It’s going to happen no matter what anyone does.
That’s just a part of life.” I reached back with one hand, Raylan’s fingers automatically tangling with mine, infusing me with his silent strength.
“Raylan is going to hurt me. Probably more than once. And I’m going to hurt him too.
Because we’re humans, and humans screw up from time to time.
But you have to trust that, even when that happens, we’ll be able to work through it and get to the other side. ”
Raylan’s fingers pulsed around mine. “She’s the love of my life,” he said fiercely.
I whipped around in shock at his moving declaration, but he was laser-focused on my brother.
“I’m going to marry her one day, and she’s going to give me a family, just like Rae is giving you.
” At that, my sister-in-law sniffled, tears staining her face.
She wasn’t the only one. My mom was also glassy-eyed as Raylan confessed his feelings for me publicly for the very first time.
“I’m going to spend the rest of my life doing everything possible to make sure she feels happiness and love every single day because she deserves nothing less.
You have my word.” Those eyes met mine, the gunmetal swirling as he smiled down at me.
“And for the record, Chaos, for me, it’s only ever been you. ”
“You really mean that.” At the awe in my brother’s voice, my gaze went back to him but he was too busy staring at his childhood friend, understanding melting into his features. “You really love her.”
“She’s air for me. She’s the blood in my veins. Without her, there’s no surviving.”
Oh my god. That was so much better than simply saying “I love you.”
“Then I’m happy for you both.” And just like that, my heart pieced itself back together. “But just remember, you treat her wrong, I’ll be there to break both your legs.”
My head fell back on a laugh. I’d expected nothing less from my overprotective big brother.
“Understood,” Raylan returned, his mouth hooking up in a grin.
“Great!” my mother declared with a clap of her hands. “Now that that’s finished, who’s hungry? I made meatball subs.”
I wasn’t sure it was possible for life to get any more perfect than it was in that very moment.