Chapter Six #3
We are welcomed in the store by a woman named Luz who tells us all about how the candles are all handmade and how most of them have herbs or crystals within them.
Janelle asks Luz for the candle we’re looking for and thankfully she does have them, but she only has three so hopefully Amerie will be satisfied with that.
Luz must help another customer before she can pack up our order, so we scan the remaining rows of candles.
Janelle picks up a navy blue and white candle that is shaped like a teapot, inspecting it closely. “You know what I was thinking?”
My brows pique at her question. “What?”
“I was thinking that I could expand Labor of Love to be more than just a birthing center.” When she first told me about her plans for Labor of Love over a year ago, I told her it was a brilliant idea.
We’ve talked about it a few times on this trip as well and I’m happy to see she’s still just as passionate about it.
“Okay, expand how?”
She gets a faraway look in her eye. I’m not even sure if she’s really talking to me or if she’s in her head.
Either way, I’m enraptured with what she has to say.
“You remember at first, I just wanted it to be a birth center geared toward women of color, specifically Black women. The mortality rate for Black women during childbirth is three times higher than that of white women, so it was important to me to offer them alternative approaches to hospital births with doctors who look like them and not only hear them but listen to them. That’s still my goal, of course, but I just keep thinking there’s more that can be done.
The care of Black women is sorely lacking in several areas, not just childbirth.
I’d like to offer other services too. Mental health services, counseling, holistic medicine, homeopathy, nutrition and dietary counseling.
I want it to be a one-stop shop for Black women, make all their care easily accessible with doctors they can trust.”
I smile at the excitement in her voice. Her energy feeds me in a way I’ve never felt before. Her drive to serve her community drives me to keep striving to do my part for our city.
“That’s a great idea. Where are you with your planning now?”
“I’ve been toying with the idea of expanding the center to be Labor of Love Health Center rather than Labor of Love Birth Center for a while, but something about these crystals and herbs embedded in these candles got me thinking about it again.”
“Take it as your sign, then.”
“Yeah. If I do it, I would need to form a board of doctors to invest and help me with it. I was prepared to go into it alone when it was just a birth center because I already have a network of doulas and midwives who would come work with me. I don’t have the network for the other services though.”
“Yet.”
She stands up straighter. “Yet. You’re right.” She looks at me with a shy smile. “I already found a place I like for it. I haven’t looked it up in a minute so it could be off the market by now but it’s perfect.”
“Where is it?”
She rattles off the location and I have to fight to keep the emotions off my face. The location she wants for her health center is a building I already own.
I had originally bought it with the intention of doing something with it for The Baltimore Collective but given the fact that it used to be some kind of clinic before it shut down, it would be an ideal setting for Labor of Love.
The Baltimore Collective is a foundation that Arnold, Christian, Micah, and I started because we wanted to see to the growth of our city.
We offer scholarships for minority students in our fields of study—computer science, sports management, communications or journalism, and art.
We also offer mentor programs for all minority students whether they want to pursue a college degree or not.
We’ve all bought buildings in and around the city to use for businesses made for us, by us.
If my building is the location Janelle wants for her center, I’ll hand her the keys tomorrow.
Getting her to agree to that, however, would be impossible.
I’ll let her go about it in her own way.
In the meantime, I make a mental note to put together a list of contractors I can give her that can help get the building where it needs to be.
“That’s a great location. It sounds like you got it all figured out. You just need to go for it.”
She sets the candle she was holding back on the shelf, tapping her lip with her finger. “Yeah, maybe. If the building is still available, then I’ll commit to looking for doctors who can join the mission.” She rears back at the Cheshire grin clouding my face. “Why do you look like that?”
“Nothing, I just have a feeling this is all going to work out in your favor.”
“I guess we’ll see, won’t we?”
“I guess so.”
When Luz brings out our package, we carefully put it in the basket on Janelle’s bike and make our way back to the hotel.
We continue talking about her ideas for Labor of Love until it’s time for her to head to her cooking class, leaving me with nothing to do. I download the second book in the series she put me on to and dive in.
Me: My room tonight?
The bubbles start and stop on my screen several times for quite a few minutes before a reply finally comes through.
J: I’m struggling
Me: With what?
J: I want to tell you no that I’m staying in my own room by myself tonight bc it’s been a shitty night and I’m in a bad mood
Me: So what’s the struggle?
J: I don’t want you to suffer my attitude but I know you’re the only one who can make me feel less shitty and I promised you my yes’s
I hate that she had a terrible night, no doubt a result of whatever bullshit Amerie must’ve been on tonight, but I do love that she knows I can make it better. Even if she’s trying to fight it.
Me: Doesn’t seem like a struggle at all then. Come to my room. Let me take care of you
I don’t receive an answer to my text. Instead, I get a soft knock on my door five minutes later.
I open it to find Janelle looking beautiful as always in black wide-leg pants and a pink, white, and black floral embroidered crop top.
Her hair is pulled back into an intricate ponytail with a pink headpiece adorning her head like a crown.
She looks exquisite but the one thing missing from her attire is her confidence.
She’s practically hunched over with her eyes firmly planted on the ground, no trace of the bold woman I’m quickly becoming addicted to.
I pull her inside and kiss her temple. Her eyes squeeze shut upon contact. “Want to tell me about it?”
“I-I think she hates me,” she whispers then jumps, shocked to hear the words come out of her own mouth.
“Amerie?” I hold out a bottle of water to her and she absentmindedly takes a sip.
“All night—all night she just kept throwing digs at me. About every fucking thing. My cooking, my outfit, my career, my love life. It was nonstop. Dani even got in her ass about it, and you know she’s normally on some keep the peace shit with us. What did I do?”
“You didn’t do anything, J.”
“No. I must’ve done something because this isn’t us. This passive aggressive hostility. It’s not how we operate, and I am trying to understand where the fuck we went wrong.”
I plant my hands at the base of her neck to keep her from going too far into her head. “Tell me what you need right now.”
“Honestly? I wanna beat her ass. I think that might make me feel better right now,” she sighs. “But I know I’ll feel like shit about it in the morning. Maybe I should leave.”
“Leave Tulum?”
“Yeah. Maybe she should make Dani the maid of honor and I should just go home.”
“And you wouldn’t feel like shit leaving before your sister’s wedding? Come on, J. You know yourself better than that.”
“I don’t know what else to do. I am losing my sister and I don’t know how to make it stop.”
“So lose her.”
Her neck snaps back and she glares at me. “What?”
“Sometimes the people who are supposed to love you the most are the ones who hurt you the worst. They don’t get a pass just because they’re family. Choose yourself.” I’ve seen the damage holding on to a toxic relationship of any kind can cause and I don’t want that for her.
She takes a moment to mull that over and I want her to think very carefully about it.
Arnold is my boy and I respect his and Amerie’s relationship but what I won’t do is tolerate disrespect shown to Janelle.
She has become far too important to me for me to watch her lose herself trying to save a relationship that isn’t serving her.
“I don’t want to give up on my sister.”
I can’t make her cut off her sister. All I can do is be there for her through this and hope that eventually she sees the people who are worth her time and the ones who aren’t. “Then allow me to take away the pain tonight.”
She looks at me with glossy eyes and dips her head bashfully.
I pull her into me and kiss her with everything in me.
I want her to feel this kiss down to her toes.
I want what I feel for her to be imprinted on her skin.
I grip the waistband of her pants and pull them down, dropping to my knees so I can provide her with support to get her shoes and pants off.
She looks down at me with pure adoration and it hits me so deeply in the chest I almost fall over.
When I stand back up, she helps me get her top off, leaving her in nothing but her pink lace lingerie set. I back her up to the bed, picking her up and placing her right in the middle.
“I want to try something with you. Do you trust me?”
“Yes,” she says without hesitation.
I grab the edge wrap scarf I bought for her in case she found herself in my room without it and place it on the bed. Then, I go to the bathroom and take the belts from the robes the hotel provided and add them to the pile.