Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-Six
I nstead of answering “no,” Jenna scurries toward the door, which serves to convince me that my feelings aren’t one-sided. What to do with them? Can we get beyond the ghost playing the keys between us?
I walk to the dining room to set the table and stop. This room is too big for the intimate conversation we need to have. So, I return to the kitchen, glance toward the island and then spot a small banquette tucked into the corner. Perfect. I make quick work of setting a couple of placemats down before she returns with the bags.
Handing her a plate, I take mine and slide the chicken parm onto it. If I were alone, no way would I bother with such niceties. With Jenna, I want to be more civilized. At least for dinner.
She carries her plate over to the dinette and sits on the cushioned banquette. I join her, sliding in next to her rather than doing the more expected thing and sitting across. My body crowds hers into the cozy nook.
She picks up her fork.
I do the same.
She cuts a piece of chicken .
I mirror her action.
She brings it to her lips and bites.
My cock shifts. When she finishes chewing, I bring my forkful of chicken to her mouth.
Grey eyes blink.
She opens her lips.
I deposit the food into her mouth.
After her lips close, I pull the clean utensil toward me.
A “pop” is the only noise she makes. I adjust my erection, which is begging for the same kind of attention.
“Good?”
“Very,” she replies.
I mimic her next few actions, feeding her my dinner despite wanting to taste my meal. I simply want to taste her more.
Her knife and fork clatter to her plate. “Bennett, what are you doing?”
Damned if I know. “Taking care of you.”
“I’m a big girl. I can do it.”
With any other woman, I wouldn’t bother. With Jenna, feeding her amps an unknown protective streak in me. “Maybe I want to.” I lean in, offering her another piece of chicken, to which she scrunches her eyebrows and shakes her head. Hint taken. I take my first bite of the meal and my mouth explodes with delicious flavors.
My head leans back and I emit a groan. “This is fucking good.”
Next to me, Jenna giggles. “Bet you’re upset by how much of yours you gave to me.”
“No.” I sit upright, donning a smirk. “But I do want to eat it now.”
I shovel forkfuls into my mouth, enjoying the vibrant Italian meal, punctuated by her floral-vanilla scent. After a moment, she picks up her utensils and continues eating. We don’t speak another word until both plates are clean.
“So good.” I extend my arm on the top of the banquette behind her. “I don’t only mean the food, although it was pretty fucking excellent. ”
“Darren always loved Italian too.”
This is the opening I need. “Are you really okay about what’s going on between us, considering he was my bandmate?” I replay my word salad. I’m usually much more articulate—hell, I write lyrics for a living.
She licks her lips. “Darren still means a lot to me, even though he’s been gone for a couple of years. He opened up my life to experiences I never would have had. He made me laugh.” A sad smile emerges. “I’m forever grateful he was in my life.”
Makes two of us. Guess he sort of saved us both.
“I like you, Bennett. This version of you anyway.”
My brows pull together. “What do you mean? What version do you see?”
She twists in her seat, dragging one leg under the other. In her quiet, deliberate tone, she says, “The one who needs help and guidance. Who needs the physical therapy I can provide.” She takes a breath. “Not the arrogant one who performs in front of thousands of people. Who discards women and drinks like they’re candy. Or the one who’s hiding his injury from the world.”
“That’s a mouthful.” I take a minute to digest what she piled on me. “There are expectations of me as the lead singer for UC. I have to always be ‘on’—for the cameras, reporters, fans. You’ve seen, firsthand, how the paparazzi can be. I’ve had to build a layer of protection around me, otherwise I’d go insane. I give them what they want, they print whatever stories they see fit. The wheels go round and round.”
“Wow. That’s just,” she tosses her napkin onto the table, “cynical. When do you have time for a private life?”
Private life? I haven’t had one of those since I joined the band. Except. “I got my GED. That was something I did for me.”
She nods. “True enough. How about a more recent example? Do you have any hobbies?”
A smirk crosses my face. “Arcade games. Especially Asteroids Deluxe. ”
“Touché. You’ve been playing a lot of that here in Aroostook. When was the last time you played before you got here?”
Her question brings me up short. “Honestly, I can’t remember.”
She goes to fiddle with her ponytail, only to realize I took it out. Her arms return to her sides. “Tell me, when was the last time you went off the grid to do something for yourself? Something you wanted to do, without any expectations or cameras?”
“I went on vacation to Ibiza not long ago.”
“Which is a place for the rich and famous to party.” She twirls a lock of hair, biting her lip. “Darren knew how to turn off the fame, and be a more subdued version of himself. It doesn’t seem to me that you ever shut down your public persona.” She tosses her hair behind her shoulders. “I’m your polar opposite, not your plaything.”
Her words lodge in my heart. “I’ve been more real with you than anyone else in memory.” My only girlfriend, Lissa, pops into my mind. I was an inexperienced teenager back when I was with her. After her, too. No one scaled the wall of infinity she left behind. I didn’t want anyone to try. Until now. “I want to allow you beneath the surface.” I blink. If there’s anything to see.
Her grey eyes get wide. “You’ve said it yourself, Bennett, many times. You don’t do friends. You like your life that way.”
My heart rate speeds up. “Maybe no one’s made me want to dive deeper?”
She shakes her head. “I’m a physical therapist, not a psychoanalyst.”
“I don’t need a shrink. Just someone who challenges me.” I follow her lead and put my napkin on my plate. “You do, Jenna. You don’t care I’m a rock star with legions of fans. You don’t let me get away with shit. Au contraire , you treat me like a normal human being. Hell, any other physical therapist would’ve been kissing my ass and letting me skip workouts. Not you. You didn’t let me get away with anything.”
“For your own good.”
I acknowledge her defense with a hand wave. “You also didn’t drool over my body, make inappropriate comments about my injury, or try to massage my cock when you were working on the muscle pull.”
Her nose wrinkles. “No self-respecting physical therapist would do any of those things.”
“Believe me, they would. I was lucky you were in the audience when I got hurt. If a groupie got a whiff of my injury, she would’ve blown me to make it better.” I don’t censor myself. Jenna needs to understand my life in order to appreciate how difficult diving deeper with another human being is for me. “I’m under no illusions that another female physical therapist wouldn’t try the same.” I fold the napkin.
“I don’t believe you about the women in my profession. Your attitude shows how jaded you are.”
We’re getting nowhere. “How many boyfriends have you had since Darren?”
She pulls her leg out from under her and sets it down on the floor. “What concern is that of yours?”
I have an unquenchable need to touch this woman. Feel her. Worship her. My hand contacts with her shoulder. “You must feel this thing between us. Hell, when we kissed, it was unlike anything I’ve ever felt.”
“I fail to see what one thing has to do with the other.”
“Because it’s bad enough I have to compete with a dead man. Who else do I have to fend off to reach your heart?” Heart ? WTF am I saying? In the past, if it didn’t have to do with pussy, I wasn’t interested. Yet, with Jenna, everything’s turned on its head.
She remains silent, so I press, “Austin?”
My question gets a reaction. “Austin?” She rears back. “No. He’s an employee. Nothing more.”
“Not from my vantage point. But I digress. If not him, then who?”
“The cocky lead singer of Untamed Coaster doesn’t ‘do’ girlfriends. Or care about relationship status. ”
“He might not, but I do. Only with you.” There. I’ve said it. Laid my heart bare. My gaze bores into hers, trying to dip into her soul.
Her head bows. She whispers, “None.”
The enormity of her answer weighs on me for a second. It doesn’t matter the legion of women I’ve been with—so it cannot matter the small number of notches on her bedpost. “All that matters is what’s between us now. It’s unlike anything I’ve experienced before. Have you ever felt like this?”
She licks her lips. “It’s different with you,” she admits. “Maybe because you’re uncontrollable.”
I sit taller. “Uncontrollable?”
“Wild. Spontaneous. Daring.”
A slow smile creeps across my face. “I like being all those things.”
She tucks her hair behind her ear. “None of them are me. Nor do I want them to be.”
“Oh, come on.” I tug on her hair to dislodge it from behind her ear. “Staying here with me was spontaneous. Taking me on as your patient was daring.” I lean in closer. “Kissing me was wild.”
She focusses on my lips. “It was that.”
I lean closer still. “Want to be wild again?”
I don’t press her. I’ve never forced myself on a woman before and I’m not starting with this one, who means more to me than any of the others. She’s real and brilliant and challenging. Three things I didn’t know I needed in my life.
“I think I do.”
This is all the permission I need, as my hands cup both of her cheeks and I bring my lips to hers. One touch is all it takes before the wildfire reignites in my soul. With a moan, I give all of myself to her. Well, all I can considering our confined space.
My hands skim her torso, cupping her boobs. She’s natural, which is another thing I like about Jenna. Nothing on her is embellished—she’s not trying to become an Instagram model or get picked off the casting couch. She eats normal-sized portions. Kisses me like I mean something to her .
I take a breather. Before I know what I’m spouting, the truth leaks out. “Jenna. I’ve never met anyone like you before. I like who you want me to be. I want to be him. For you.”
She touches my hair, my ears, my nose. “I understand why you keep this hidden from the world.” Her hand covers my upper left chest. “I only wish you’d let me or your bandmates inside your real world.”
I’m not about to let anyone into my “real world,” let alone this beautiful creature. “Believe me, it’s much better this way.” I trail kisses down the side of her neck, pausing as her pulse pounds.
She tilts her head back to give me better access. Being no fool, I take her up on her unspoken offer. Soon, though, this banquette is too constricting. I want more room to spread out and enjoy her. “Up.”
“What?”
“What I want to do to you requires we have more space. A lot more space.”
“Oh,” she pants. “I, uhm . . .”
No time for her to worry about something stupid, like the dishes aren’t put away. Or the curtains aren’t drawn. Or whatever nonsense is running through her beautiful mind.
I tug her shirt up and over her head. It lands with a tiny plop on the floor. “Unless you want me to lay you out on this table. Which would mean I’ll have to toss these dishes onto the floor.”
That gets her attention. I suppress my chuckle when she leaps from her seat and skirts around the table, causing me to get to my feet and hiss. Stupid fucking groin pull. I remain still for a moment, until the pain dissipates, then walk to the kitchen island. Hopefully Jenna didn’t notice.
“How’s your leg?”
Leave it to my observant physical therapist. “It’s fine. I’m more interested in how you’re doing.” I don a lascivious grin, one I hope hides my pain.
Her head tilts. “How about we put more ice on your thigh.”
“How about we don’t? ”
“Which leads me to believe you need it now more than ever. Come on.” She disappears, and the freezer opens. I hear her rummaging with a baggie, then the clinks of ice. Her blonde head appears next to mine. “Why don’t you sit in the family room so you can stretch out?”
I need to turn this table back to the fevered kisses. “How about this? We do a little hot, then cold.”
“Excuse me?”
“If I have to have another freaking ice pack, then I’ll need something to warm me up. I’ll sit on the sofa over there”—I quirk my head toward the family room—“and you play nurse. Then I’ll play...My voice trails off. Pimp. Dom. Alpha . Jeez, all these are not what I’m looking for.
Jenna rescues me. “Randy teen?”
“That’ll do.”
We relocate to the family room, where she slaps the ice pack on my thigh as soon as my butt hits the leather sofa. When she’s finished inspecting my muscle pull, I grab her around the waist.
“I’ve never seen a nurse as sexy as you, Miss Westfield. Especially one without a shirt.”
Her brow arches. “A gentleman such as you, Mr. Hardy, shouldn’t speak of my state of undress.”
“Even if this ‘gentleman’ was the cause of the article of clothing being missing?” My hands reach out and weigh her boobs. Not huge, but definitely more than a mouthful. “Let me reciprocate.” I toss my shirt somewhere into the room.
Her gaze lands on my necklace, then lowers to my tattoos. Her breath catches. “Oh my.”
“You know what, nurse? It hurts down there too.”
“Looks like it might.” Her hand remains on my thigh.
I reach around and unhook her bra, with practiced ease. “I think these might be a good distraction.”
My lips close in on her nipple, sucking. Her back arches, giving me better access. Without hesitation, I nibble and then lave her distended nipple. Then I move to the other boob. Have to give them equal time.
I slide my hand down to her pants and pop open the button. My fingers dip inside, reveling in her warm heat.
“I need to check the ice pack.”
My fingers tap against the sofa as she stands and takes a step. I reach out and grab her around the waist. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“I was giving you some room. Because of the ice, you know?”
“Good try sweetheart.” Sweetheart . There’s that word again. I tug her body and she comes closer to me. We both watch as her zipper lowers.
Her pants and panties sail to the floor.
She stands before me, naked. “You’re beautiful, Jenna. Do you know that?”
A bemused smile crosses her face. “I’m nothing special.”
“If you believe that, then you’ve been hanging out with the wrong men.” I’m sure Darren wouldn’t let her believe such foolishness. I shake my head to clear it. The only people in this relationship tonight are Jenna and me. All others can fuck off. “Open your legs.”
“What?” I tap the insides of her thighs, and she complies. No sooner are her legs open, then I rub her clit. “Oh!”
“I like the sound of that, Jenna.” My fingers do a circling motion, causing her lower torso to roll for me. The ice pack falls off my thigh and lands on the floor, but she doesn’t notice. I’m too wrapped up in bringing her pleasure to care.
Her hands blindly reach out to hold onto my shoulders, causing her boobs to dance in front of me. I do the only sensible thing, and latch onto one while my fingers play her like a well-tuned guitar. I want to make her scream in pleasure. Lose herself to me. This is happening.
My mouth moves to her other nipple. I dive deeper into her wet core, and make a come-hither motion to hit her G-spot .
“Bennett.” Her breathing turns erratic, her hips moving in time with my fingers.
I circle her clit, wishing it were my tongue rather than my fingers doing the work. Next time. Eyes closed, her body is mine to direct. She keeps climbing and climbing, but never lets go.
She needs to surrender.
I bite her nipple, then soothe it with my tongue. She’s like a live wire, ready but unable to explode. I pull back. My fingers continue to play music only she can hear. Her breathing becomes more labored, sweat drips down her torso onto mine. I want her to be free.
Unable to do any more for her in this position, I say, “Come for me, Jenna.”
No sooner is my command out of my mouth, then she blows apart. Her core clutches my fingers in a vice-like grip, even more liquid coats my fingers. She screams something undecipherable as her back arches. I’ve never seen anything more beautiful in my life. I’m fully hard.
She collapses and I catch her by her shoulders, directing her onto the sofa next to me. Her head connects with my chest, and her hand plays with my necklace. The one she gave me so long ago. My cock twitches, reminding me he’s more than ready to play.
“Oh my God, Bennett. Oh my God.”
“I’m not a deity, Jenna.” I kiss the top of her head. “But I can be yours.”
Her hand trails down my chest to the top of my jeans. And lower. And lower. She sits up, staring down at me. “What happened? Your ice pack is on the floor.”
I shrug. “I think it fell off somewhere between your calling me a god and my fingers encircling your clit. Or was it when I was kissing your tits?”
She turns beet red. I fucking love that my words—however crude—can do this to her. Her hand snakes out and she picks up the ice and returns it to my thigh.
“Shit, that’s still cold. ”
“You need to keep it on.” She stands and walks deeper into the room. She’s so gorgeous, in an unassuming way. Bending down, she picks up my discarded shirt and tosses it over her naked body.
I cross my arms and fake pout. “Not fair. You look better in my shirt than I do.” Something primal in me puffs out at her wearing my clothing.
“The doctor said no sex.”
If the ice pack didn’t do it, her latest reminder did. My cock deflates as if it were a bad boy and needed to be punished. “Nothing wrong with getting you off, though.”
Her blush returns. “Thank you.”
I don’t think I’ve ever been thanked for an orgasm before. “You’re welcome?” I let my question end on an upward note.
She looks around the room. “Well, I think I should go to bed. To sleep. Tomorrow’s a very big day, you know? I shouldn’t stay here. With you like that. I mean, keep the ice pack on for another fifteen minutes, then you can go to bed too. In your own bed. Good night!” She runs out of the room, never even stopping to clean up the dirty dishes.
If this is how she reacts to my fingers, I can’t wait to see what my cock does to her.