Chapter Forty-Five
Asher
After the dishes are done, I return to the couch and boot up the laptop. Burning Eddie was a choice I’d make again in a heartbeat. I won’t put Raine in any more danger than she’s already in.
But if GSD really did track Eddie through Mason, they could be onto any of my other aliases. Including the one whose shell company owns the lease on this apartment.
At the table, Raine is copying codes and system messages from this morning’s files into a notebook. The layout is clean. Lines, arrows, notes, all perfectly aligned in rows and columns. A pattern only she could build.
I run a final check on Eddie. No results. Good. Everything I buried stayed that way. No surprises. There’s one more thing I have to do before I check on Tessa.
It takes me almost an hour. By the time I’m done, anyone who even breathes near the shell companies tied to this apartment or the one in Bellevue will light up half a dozen tripwires before whoever’s asking knows what they’ve found.
I log out of everything and bring up a map of downtown Seattle. She’ll be safe here until I get back from checking on Tessa and picking up Raine’s fresh ID from the dead drop. But that doesn’t mean I can leave without worry.
She notices the second I push up from the couch, placing her pen directly above the notebook, shoulders tight, and swiveling in the chair. “You’re…going to check on Tessa?”
“Yes. I need to make a grocery run too.”
Her thumb drifts to her index finger. But the moment they touch, she stifles a wince.
Sinking down next to her, I cover her left hand with mine. “Raine? What are you looking for?”
“I told you. Patterns in these escalations—”
“No. There.” Nodding toward her hand, I shift until her thumb and index finger are free. “You keep reaching for something. I’ve seen you do it every day—multiple times— but I didn’t want to push.”
After a sharp inhale, she drops her gaze and almost…
deflates. “I had a ring. It wasn’t anything…
expensive. Or particularly meaningful. I bought it a few years ago.
Just a band with a bunch of tiny lab-grown diamonds all around it.
” She sighs, her shoulders curving inward.
“I told you I have issues with textures…”
“Beef and pork. Seams. Synthetic fabrics. Some sounds. Silence.”
With each one I name, her eyes widen a little more. “You’ve been keeping track.”
“I live here.”
That earns me something that might almost be a laugh. “Fair enough.”
“So…the ring? You don’t have to explain. I just…want to know you.” It’s the simplest version of the truth. But not the uncensored one. I do want to know her, but I also want to undo all the damage Coherent Path did to her.
“The diamonds were tiny. Not much more than chips. But the way they were set…the texture was uneven. Like…pebbles. I should have hated it.” Her voice splinters around the edges, and she balls her left hand into a fist. “But it was predictable. Calming. Every time I touched it, I knew exactly what I’d feel. ”
“And now you don’t.”
“They took everything.” That last word is a harsh whisper, and she swallows a soft sound, not quite a sob, but close.
“My clothes. They cut them off me rather than remove the restraints. And the ring… To them, it was just something else to strip away.” After a long moment, Raine lifts her chin, her voice steadying. “My body hasn’t…adjusted yet. It will.”
I dip my free hand into my pocket, find the warm edges of the coin I’ve carried for more than fifteen years, and close my fingers around it. I know each ridge along the outside, the slight bevel where the edge dips, the raised lines in the center—a triangle over the letter Z.
“I helped a team with a few extractions and surveillance missions before my father was killed and I committed to this life. After the second one, Dad gave me this.”
I set the coin on the table between us. Raine frowns, her gaze scanning the surface of the bronze piece before lifting to mine.
“He told me to carry it so I wouldn’t forget what I stand for.”
Raine studies the coin the way she studies everything. Cataloging, filing information away for later in case she needs it.
“Try it.” I nudge it closer to her.
She shakes her head. “Asher, this matters to you.”
“It does. So do you. If it helps, hold onto it for me. If it doesn’t, you can give it back.”
For a long moment, the only sounds in the apartment are the low music playing and our breathing. Hers is quicker, but eventually settles into a rhythm that matches mine.
Raine picks up the coin, closing her fingers around it once, then loosening them so she can drag her thumb over the lines in the center. “It’s solid. And predictable. But your logic is flawed. I can’t take something that anchors you.”
“I won’t forget what I stand for just because that coin is in your pocket and not mine. I’m not trying to replace what they took. And before you say it, I’m not going to run out for coffee and come back with diamonds.”
The look she gives me isn’t quite disbelief, but it’s close.
“Raine, I see you. All of you. If this helps when your brain starts to go somewhere you don’t want, then it’s doing a hell of a lot more good in your hand than in my pocket.
” I pause long enough for her to know I’m not saying any of this lightly.
“I’m not going anywhere, remember? You can give the coin back any time.
Tomorrow. Next week. When this is all over and you buy yourself a new ring.
Or…never. As long as I know it’s safe, I’m good. ”
She studies the coin in her hand, her thumb moving along the ridges on the outside. Once. Twice.
“Okay,” she says softly. “For now.”
“For now.”
I don’t want to shatter the moment—this connection we’re building with every real conversation we have—but if I don’t leave soon, I’ll miss my best chance to check on Tessa. “We should go over our contingency plans again. I don’t expect you to need them while I’m gone, but—“
She nods. “It would be irresponsible to ignore the possibility.”
I offer her my hand. Her fingers are cool but steady as I lead her into the bedroom. Our go bags are side-by-side on the bed. “The left one is yours. Make sure it’s not too heavy?”
She tests the weight, first in her hand, then on her uninjured shoulder. “It’s fine. Even with the laptop and the access point, I can manage it.”
“Good. I packed two sets of your clothes, an extra pair of socks, and your toiletries. Plus cash, a medical kit, and a Beretta with a full magazine in the inside pocket. I left a ball cap and a pair of sunglasses for you on the coffee table.”
Another nod.
“Safest exit is the service corridor behind the laundry room on the first floor. It’ll spit you out on the west side of the building. Two blocks south, one block east, you’ll see a UPark lot with a dark blue Chevy in spot A20. Here’s the key fob.”
She tucks the clunky piece of plastic into her pocket.
“If you’re being followed and you can’t shake the tail, go to Pike Place Market. It’s busy enough you should be safe for a short time. Otherwise, meet me at the Bellevue safe house. The code to the door is inside the medical kit. If I don’t make contact within an hour of your arrival, run.”
Raine steps closer, her arms winding around my waist and her cheek resting against my chest. Slowly, I bring my palm to her lower back, giving her every opportunity to tell me to stop. I’m so fucking glad she doesn’t.
“Don’t go dark on me, Asher,” she says, her voice quiet, but steady. “If they touch you, I won’t just expose them. I’ll burn the entire system down.”