Tango
The atmosphere during the afternoon was comfortable and pleasurable for Burke, as it always was when he spent time with Donna and the kids.
Even with Donna’s mom there all afternoon and at dinner, it didn’t change how it felt so normal to him.
He allowed his thoughts to linger on what a permanent relationship between them could look like and how it could be achieved.
Until then, he’d told himself it was impossible.
The kids helped him make dinner, which was a fun time with a lot of laughter.
Jeriah may not have laid the noodles in straight lines, but she was proud of the job she’d done.
And he taught the boys how to brown ground beef in a pan.
They’d never cooked anything on the stove before.
Donna and her mom sat at the table and watched as the meal was made, marveling at Rich’s patience.
While the lasagna cooked in the oven, they played board and card games, as there were shelves full of games in the kid’s bedroom.
Each kid got to pick one game they all played together.
They ate as a family. It was relaxed, and Burke was aware that he felt something inside that was very different this visit from past visits.
It was an openness to exploring a deeper, more official relationship with Donna, a desire to make the arrangement permanent.
It was also an appreciation that this was his family, and he wanted an official recognition of that fact.
Somehow, he would have to try to help her be okay with his job.
Maybe Wilson was right. If Rae talked to Donna or if she had an appointment with Lassiter, just maybe, Donna could be okay with the job.
Burke read the kids bedtime stories, and he and Donna tucked them into bed.
Dorthea had retired to her room shortly after dinner.
And then he and Donna returned to the family room.
He sat on the couch and pulled her onto his lap.
“The day was perfect,” he said. He wrapped one arm around her, and he laced his fingers with hers with his free hand.
“It was,” she agreed. “I wish you could spend more time with us.”
“I've was thinking about that, Donna,” he said. “I wasn’t going to talk to you about this until after Christmas, but since we’re on the subject, I would like to spend more time with you guys.
But the job I do isn’t easy on families.
I’ve tried to keep our relationship as just friends so it’s not too much on you. ”
“I told you I can handle it, Rich,” she insisted, irritated that he felt he had to keep their relationship as just friends because of how she had reacted to his job previously. If she could take back how she freaked out about her sister getting shot and the danger their job brought, she would.
“I have my weapon holstered in my boot today so that you wouldn’t accidentally bump into it and freak out like you do,” he said. “That’s not handling it.”
“I don’t freak out! It just startled me because I wasn’t thinking about it.
” She shook her head. “Rich, we’ve only been together a few times over the last year.
Each time, I was just excited to see you, and my thoughts weren’t on the fact that your weapon would be on your hip or at the small of your back.
I admit, I overreacted a few times. If I know where you’re carrying it, I won’t be surprised.
And I was wrong to ask you not to bring it into my house.
I know you’d never let one of the kids get their hands on it. I promise I’ll handle it better.”
“Maybe,” he said. “It’s not just that, Donna. You know I work long hours and am deployed on missions five days out of seven most weeks, sometimes more. We’re on call and deploy with little notice sometimes. It’s not easy on the families.”
“I know,” she said.
“I don’t want to end up hurting you or the kids.”
“I trust you, Rich. I trust that you won’t hurt us. You’ve stayed in our lives by choice for over a year. You didn’t have to. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had, and I can’t imagine you not in my life.”
Burke pressed a closed-mouth kiss to her lips. “You’re very special to me, too. I don’t want to fuck that up. It would break my heart if you ended up hating me.”
“I could never hate you, Rich.”
“Sure, you could. If we take this past friendship and you can’t live with the job, you’ll hate me because I’ll never make a choice. Think about that for a minute; what I mean by that. And what that will mean for you.”
She dropped her forehead against his. She wanted to argue with him. She wanted to convince him that she’d never ask him to make a choice between the job and herself, but she knew she couldn’t swear to that. “I want to be okay with it.”
“My buddy, Wilson, suggested you talk to his fiancé, Rae, about what it’s like.
And we do have a team shrink. You could talk to him too,” Burke said.
“Well, if we do get deeper into this relationship, you’d definitely talk to the team shrink.
All the wives and girlfriends talk to him to help deal with the job we do. ”
“I’m not opposed to talking with either of them,” Donna said courageously.
Burke kissed her again. A real kiss, a passionate kiss.
Instantly, he was aroused. He pulled his lips away.
He needed to have more of that conversation with her before he made love to her, and he was close to doing that.
His eyes stared deeply into her half-hooded eyes, which beamed desire, affection, and trust at him.
“What do you think a deeper relationship would look like between us?” he asked. He truly wanted to know what she wanted in a relationship.
“Well,” she began, not sure how honest she should be. She didn’t want to scare him away. “For starters, I want to make love with you, and I want us to sleep in the same bed all night. I need to know that we’re exclusively seeing each other,” she said bravely.
A smile pulled up Burke’s lips. “Donna, I haven’t seen any other woman since I met you. We’re exclusive and we have been as far as I’m concerned.”
Relief flooded through her, bringing peace to her as well. She didn’t know if he’d been seeing other women or not. She’d never asked. “I haven’t been with any man since Jeriah’s father. And he left when I was pregnant with her.”
“His loss,” Burk said. “And I’m sorry he made that choice. You deserved better.” He continued to stare into her eyes. “Anything else?”
She knew he was asking what else their deeper relationship would look like to her. Her self-confidence to put more out there faltered. “What do you see it looking like?”
“Like this,” he said.
He kissed her again, this time parting her lips with his tongue.
This kiss was different from all others they’d ever shared.
He kissed her with intent, with affection, with unrestrained desire.
He wasn’t sure how far the physical relationship would go tonight, if he’d make love to her tonight or not, but it would go farther than it had in the past, he was sure.
And unlike in the past, he wasn’t already thinking about when to pull back, how to stop it from going too far.
He enjoyed the kiss, and he allowed himself to enjoy it.
Donna returned Rich’s kiss with much passion, matching the enthusiasm he showed.
Something was different. Maybe it was how he held her.
Maybe it was how she didn’t sense that he was going to stop and pull away any second, like he always did.
Or maybe it was because of the conversation they were having.
His hands caressed places on her body he had never touched, which gave her the courage to run her hand over the front of his pants, over his very hard member.
She had only stroked him there a few times, and he always removed her hand and halted anything physical between them.
It was akin to getting her hand slapped.
This time he didn’t. She shifted her position, so that she straddled him, to allow her hand better access to his cock.
In doing so, she raised up just enough that her breasts pressed into his face.
He moaned his pleasure at her touch and at her breasts in front of his eyes.
He slid his lips down her neck and into her cleavage as his hands massaged her breasts, cupping them both.
Encouraged by his advances, Donna worked his belt until it was undone and then pulled at the button. Then she lowered his zipper.
With the sensation of her hand slipping between the fabric of his boxers and his lower abdomen, coming in contact with his throbbing shaft, Burke pulled his mind from the erotic fog, and he leaned back to create a little space between them, his eyes boring into her dilated, wide eyes.
“We need to slow this down,” he said.
Donna saw the shift in him the second it happened.
And when his gaze met hers, she knew the switch had flipped in him.
He was about to pull away. What the fuck?
Instead of stopping, she grasped him more tightly and stroked his full length.
“No, I think that’s the last thing we need to do,” she purred while she flashed him her most erotic smile as she continued to stroke him.
“Oh, fuck, does that feel good,” he growled. Damn, did the soft skin of her hand, with its impossibly firm grip, feel amazing on his cock.
“Just enjoy it,” she said, still working her hand over his shaft.
She could tell that he was having a hard time telling her no.
She leaned in and left a trail of wet kisses up his neck.
She paid special attention to his ear, nibbling on the lobe and blowing a hot breath over it.
He even leaned in a way that gave her better access.