5
Milly
Zoe settled into the passenger seat and looked at her expectantly. “How was the date? Was it fun? Did you like him? Tell me everything.”
Milly felt a stab of guilt. “Zoe—”
“I’m okay with it, honestly. You deserve to be happy. Can I meet him?”
She broke off, uncertain. “If you don’t want to talk about it, I get it.”
How had she ever got herself in this tangled mess? She tried never to tell lies, and she hadn’t lied. She just hadn’t told them what she was doing, and when they’d made assumptions she hadn’t corrected them because she knew that if she’d corrected them, then they would have wanted to know the truth, and that would have meant violating her promise to Nicole.
Also she didn’t want to talk about Nicole. She’d told no one that her friend had ghosted her. It had been too painful, so she’d kept that to herself. It felt like another failure on her part. She imagined people looking at her and thinking First her husband, and then her best friend.
It was at times like this she wished she wasn’t so close to her family. Normally she was grateful for it, but it made things complicated when you had something to hide.
“Zoe, there’s something I need to tell you, and I need to tell you before you get home tonight.”
“What? Is he at the boathouse? Are you about to tell me that your date went so well he’s moving in?”
“No! Why would you—”
Milly took a deep breath. “It wasn’t a date, Zoe. I never said it was a date.”
“But Gramma and Nanna Peg said—”
“I know what they said. When I told them I needed you to stay with them for the night, they jumped to conclusions, and I didn’t correct them.”
“Why not?”
“Because they needed to think something, and I couldn’t tell them the truth. I made a promise to someone.”
And now she was about to break that promise, but she couldn’t see any other way. Zoe lived in the boathouse. What was Milly supposed to do? Arrange for her daughter to stay with her grandmother for the duration of Nicole’s visit however long that turned out to be? That wasn’t going to happen. After all the upheaval Zoe had endured in the past eighteen months, Milly was determined to minimize any change in her life. No, Zoe was staying in her own home. Sleeping in her own room.
All the same she felt uncomfortable because she prided herself on being one hundred percent discreet and dependable as a friend, and that wasn’t going to change just because Nicole’s own behavior had fallen short. If someone told her a secret, she guarded it fiercely. And Nicole’s presence was a secret.
She wished she’d thought to discuss this part with Nicole so at least she was warned.
“I’m going to tell you something, and you can’t repeat it to anyone. Not to Dad, not to your friends at school—especially not your friends at school. I’m trusting you with this because I know you won’t gossip.”
Did she know that? Zoe was thirteen and had a close group of friends. Granted, they spent far more time outdoors on their bikes than they did curled up indoors painting their nails, but they were still teenagers, and they still giggled and talked. Milly didn’t know what they talked about, but remembering herself at the same age she was pretty sure there weren’t many topics that would be out of bounds. Zoe probably talked about things she wouldn’t discuss with her mother, which was exactly how it should be, of course. But gossip? The sharing of secrets? That was different. Having Nicole Raven staying in your house would be enough to make the average teenager burst with excitement, but hopefully Zoe would be able to contain herself.
Milly drove out of the village and eased into the traffic on the main road.
Zoe was virtually vibrating with expectation. “What?”
“Do you promise not to say anything?”
“I promise! Am I supposed to swear a blood oath or something? This is pretty intense. What’s going on?”
“Last night I had to go out, that’s true, but I wasn’t on a date.”
“I know! You just said that, but where were you, then? Mum, you’re killing me. Just say it!”
But once she said it she wouldn’t be able to unsay it. She wished she’d never been put in this position. “Nicole called me a couple of days ago.”
“Nicole?”
There was a pause as Zoe absorbed that. “You mean our Nicole? Aunt Nicole?”
“Yes, our Nicole.”
She felt a pang of loss because there had been a time when she had indeed thought of her friend that way. When they were young she’d thought of Nicole as family. Sister. She’d had such a shiny view of their friendship. “She called and asked me for help. She’s in some trouble.”
“Is this anything to do with that story a few days ago? The one with Justin Fisher pulling stupid faces next to his wife? Awkward. You could tell he so didn’t want to be there. She had her hand locked around his wrist, like literally trapping him in place so he couldn’t run.”
It probably shouldn’t have surprised her that her daughter knew more about it than she did, but what did surprise her was that Zoe hadn’t mentioned it.
“You’ve seen those stories?”
“Everyone has seen those stories.”
“You didn’t mention it.”
“Because you hate that stuff. You always have.”
That was true. “I’m guessing it’s linked. She’s being hounded by the press. She asked for my help, and I agreed. I picked her up from the station last night. We got in late and both went straight to sleep. We haven’t talked about it properly yet.”
That conversation was still to come, and she wasn’t looking forward to it. Even though Nicole had hinted that there was more to the story than the headlines suggested, technically she was Avery in this situation. Milly wasn’t confident she’d be able to offer nonjudgmental support. She wanted to be worldly and broad-minded, but she wasn’t feeling either of those things. She was feeling disillusioned and disappointed, and she didn’t understand why people couldn’t exercise more self-restraint. There were plenty of men in the world, plenty of single men, so why did Avery have to target Richard?
She realized that Avery and Nicole had somehow merged together in her mind. She needed to separate them.
“You’re saying Aunt Nicole is staying in our house?”
Zoe’s voice was an excited squeak. “Like hiding?”
“Yes, I suppose you could say she is hiding.”
Milly felt a sudden flash of panic. What if someone knocked on her door before she got home? It was unlikely, but not impossible.
Hopefully Nicole would have the sense not to open the door.
“This is amazing!”
Zoe virtually bounced on her seat. “Aunt Nicole in my house. Unbelievable.”
It was a good thing that one of them was excited.
“You’ve known her since you were a baby, and we’ve stayed with her before.”
“I know we have, and that was amazing too, but this is different. Nicole Raven is in my house! It’s a very big deal.”
Zoe was transformed by the news. There was no slump in her shoulders, and her face was one big smile. “Can she share my room?”
“I’ve made up the sofa in the study for now.”
“I can’t believe she’s staying with us. How long for?”
“I don’t know.”
Forever. No, surely Nicole had been kidding about that. On the other hand if her presence was going to make Zoe this happy, then as far as Milly was concerned Nicole could move in for good. “You can’t say anything to anyone.”
“I won’t. But why is she hiding? She shouldn’t be the one hiding. He should be hiding. He’s so fake. And weak.”
Zoe injected the last word with all the disdain of her thirteen years. “Also a cheat. Nicole can do so much better.”
Milly hadn’t expected that reaction. She hadn’t expected her daughter to have an opinion on the subject at all. She still thought of her as a child most of the time. “The news reports are calling her a home-wrecker.”
“Ugh,”
Zoe said disparagingly. “They always blame the woman. Have you noticed that? Cally says it’s a sign the patriarchy is alive and well. Aunt Nicole is single,”
she said. “She didn’t cheat, lie or break promises did she? He’s the one who is married. He made a choice, and now he’s been caught out he’s like making out he’s some sort of victim because he’s too much of a coward to own his decision.”
This conversation wasn’t going the way Milly had expected it to. “You’ve talked about it with your friends?”
“Aunt Nicole is our favorite actor. She’s Amara, Mum. She saved the world, remember? You saw the movie.”
One minute they were grown-up and talking about the patriarchy and the next they were children talking about a character as if they were real.
“Right. Well, Nicole/Amara is staying with us, and we can’t tell anyone. I probably should have checked you were okay with it before agreeing, but it all happened quickly, and she was desperate, and I felt I should offer support.”
And she still didn’t know if that made her a good friend or a total pushover.
“Of course you had to help. She’s your closest friend.”
And for Zoe that was all it took. It seemed simple to her, just as it would have seemed simple to Milly at the same age. You helped your closest friend. You dropped everything for your closest friend. Sisterhood was real.
Until it wasn’t.
“So you won’t mind her being there?”
“Mind? Are you kidding?”
Zoe grinned. “I mean, she’s like the biggest actor in the world. So hot right now. I really liked her as that archaeologist in the dinosaur movie, but Amara was her best part. I have seen that movie at least nine times. She doesn’t take any crap from anyone.”
“Language.”
“Sorry, but it’s true. She’s so strong. She meets every obstacle head-on.”
Milly wished she was more like Amara. If she was, she’d talk to Richard face-to-face about his bad behavior instead of calling when she knew he wasn’t going to answer his phone and leaving an insipid message.
Although, he did the same to her. He’d left a message on her phone an hour ago telling her he wasn’t going to be able to have Zoe to stay at the weekend after all.
As usual he’d left her to break the news to his daughter. She was expected to reframe the message in a way that was more palatable. But now wasn’t the moment. She was too upset with him to keep her tone neutral.
This was one of those times when she missed her old friendship with Nicole. She could have vented and maybe laughed, but now there was no chance of that.
She forced her mind back to the current problem. “I’m glad you’re excited, but keep it to yourself.”
“Got it. It’s a secret. But you’re going to have to tell Gramma and Nanna Peg, otherwise they will keep asking about your date. Also they’re always popping into the boathouse on their way past, so unless Nicole is going to be hiding under the bed the whole time they’re going to find her.”
She wasn’t wrong about that.
“I am going to tell them, but I wanted to discuss it with Nicole first.”
Zoe grabbed her schoolbag from the floor of the car. “And how exactly are you going to hide her? Is she going to wear a disguise or something?”
“I haven’t figured that part out yet. For the moment she is staying indoors, and hopefully that will be enough.”
Milly pulled up outside the school. Her head was throbbing. “Have a good day. I’ll be back here at four to pick you up.”
“Five. I have an extra drama session because the play is coming up.”
“Five it is.”
Was it her imagination, or did Zoe seem less enthusiastic about that than she should have been? “How’s that going?”
“Great.”
Zoe smiled brightly. “I’ll see you later, unless you want to send Nicole, and if she could come dressed as Amara, that would be even better. At least it would make me popular.”
“She’s keeping a low profile, so she won’t be coming dressed as Amara. Oh, there’s Cally—”
Milly spotted Zoe’s best friend heading toward school. She gave a little beep of her horn, and Cally glanced briefly at the car but then carried on walking. “She didn’t see us. If you sprint, you can catch her.”
“Sure. See you later.”
Zoe opened the car door and headed toward school, but she didn’t sprint or yell for Cally to wait.
Milly watched her go and only then did Zoe’s words penetrate her busy brain.
At least it would make me popular.
What did she mean by that? To the best of her knowledge Zoe had never had any trouble making friends, but her best friend had always been Cally. They had the same special bond that Milly and Nicole had once had. As close as blades of grass, as her mother used to say.
So why the comment about being popular? Was she being flippant, or did it mean something?
Exhausted at the thought that she now had something else to worry about, she drove home, thinking instead of what her daughter had said about Nicole.
She didn’t cheat, lie or break promises did she? He’s the one who is married.
The same could be said of Richard, but Milly had directed most of her anger toward Avery. She’d been angry and upset that Avery had chosen to have an affair with a married man when she could have picked anyone. But Richard could have chosen not to, couldn’t he?
He could have chosen Milly. But he’d chosen Avery.
Milly’s eyes stung. She hated feeling this way. Richard was getting on with his life, and she was still stuck in the same place, her confidence stripped away.
That was why she preferred to blame Avery. It was easier to handle emotionally than acknowledging that Richard had made a choice not to be with her.
But he had made that choice, and it was time he took responsibility for it. And it was time he took responsibility for his daughter.
She pulled over and dialed his number. It went straight to voice mail, which was a relief, and she almost left her usual civilized polite response acknowledging that she’d received his message and would pass it on, but then she stopped herself. Be more Amara.
“You know what, Richard?”
Her voice was strong and clear. “If you can’t keep your promises to your daughter, then don’t make them in the first place. Every time you don’t show up, you’re telling her she’s not important, that she doesn’t matter, and I’m damned if you’re going to make her feel as if she doesn’t matter. So don’t do it. Just don’t.”
She was shaking as she ended the call, but she also felt vaguely satisfied. Okay, so she hadn’t actually said the words to his face, but at least she’d made it clear that his behavior was unacceptable. It was a start.
Maybe she wouldn’t ask for a refund on her assertiveness course after all.
Feeling a little more in control than usual, she headed back to Forest Nest and parked outside the building that housed the reception area for the resort and their offices.
“Hi, Milly!”
Anna was working behind the reception desk. “Everyone is already in the meeting. There’s a coffee waiting for you.”
“Thanks, Anna. Any problems?”
“Not so far. There was a leak in the bathroom in Aspen Lodge, but the new guests aren’t due to arrive until five, and Joel thinks he will have it sorted by then. He sent his regrets. He’s prioritizing plumbing over the meeting. He says he needs to talk to you later about doing some maintenance on the deck.”
“No problem. I’ll find him when we’re done here. Thanks, Anna.”
She walked through to the private staff offices that were behind the desk.
The buzz of conversation eased as she walked into the room. “Hi, everyone. I know you’re all busy, so let’s make this quick.”
She sat down, took a sip of coffee and glanced at her team. Most of them had worked at Forest Nest for years, first for her mother and now for her. The people here felt more like family than colleagues. “Sofia? Why don’t you start?”
Sofia was head of Guest Relations. She made it her business to know as much as she possibly could about each person checking in so that they could deliver a bespoke service.
“The guests in Hazel, Blackthorn, Elder, Hawthorn and Aspen have all checked out this morning, and those cabins are booked out next week so we have a busy turnaround day. Mark and Philip Tyrell are in Hazel, and this is their honeymoon, so we need to add a bottle of fizz to their welcome pack, Lorna.”
“Got it.”
Lorna was head of Housekeeping and prided herself in keeping the mud and all evidence of the lake and forest outside the cabins.
“Blackthorn Lodge is booked out to a young couple from Australia who have visited before,”
Sofia said. “They’d like mountain bikes for the whole week. Geoff?”
“Already waiting for them outside the lodge.”
“He’s six foot three—”
“I know. It’s in the notes. We didn’t have the right bike, so I had to do a fast negotiation with my opposite number at a certain hotel we will not name, but it’s all sorted.”
Not for the first time Milly was grateful for the excellent relationship they maintained with all the local businesses. It was something her mother had started, and Milly had been careful to continue that approach.
This area was blessed with more than its fair share of upmarket hotels, which meant they couldn’t afford to let their standards drop even for a moment.
Milly was confident that what they provided was every bit as luxurious as the five-star hotels close by, but with more flexibility and a personal touch. They kept meticulous records on every guest and offered a degree of privacy that was rare these days. The cabins had views across the lake and forest, and there was a wildness to the surroundings that guests found restorative.
“Elder is booked by a family who are new to us. It’s a seventieth-birthday celebration, so we have three generations in that lodge . . .”
Sofia carried on, running them quickly through the names and details of the new arrivals so that everyone had all the necessary details.
Milly checked her notes. “Brendan Scott has booked Beech for the whole summer to finish writing his novel, so we just need to get in there at some point this week and make sure the place is clean for him.”
There was silence around the table, and she glanced up. “What? Did I miss something?”
She saw Sofia glance at Lorna, but Lorna kept her eyes down.
Trouble, Milly thought, but decided it was probably best dealt with privately.
“Leo is going to start opening the coffee shop at seven from tomorrow, and he’ll be serving the usual cakes and light lunches, with help from Tilly, who started two weeks ago and is doing brilliantly.”
Maybe she should volunteer to help out. A commercial kitchen, even a small one, might cure her of her urge to bake in her own home. “Lorna, we’re going to start including some of their homemade brownies in the welcome packs.”
“The woman staying in Aspen is gluten-free,”
Sofia said, and Lorna made a note.
“Tilly makes a perfect gluten-free cupcake, so I’ll substitute with that.”
Geoff smiled at her across the table. “How do you know it’s perfect? You’ve already tried it?”
“I’ve tried everything we offer to the guests,”
Lorna said. “I ordered the cupcakes for my birthday along with a massive bunch of flowers.”
Sofia raised her eyebrows. “You ordered your own cake and flowers?”
“Yes, because I knew that if I waited for Duncan to do it, then it wouldn’t happen. Romantic gestures aren’t really his thing.”
Duncan was Lorna’s long-term boyfriend, although she’d recently confided to Milly that she wasn’t sure if he was the one or not. How do you know if you want to marry someone or not? It seems a big step.
Milly, who had been questioning everything about her relationship since Richard had cheated on her and then walked out, had no advice to impart. In the end she’d suggested Lorna follow her heart, and she’d tried not to think about the fact that she’d done exactly that and look where it had got her.
Conscious that she’d left Nicole on her own for far too long, Milly tried to move the meeting along. “I’m replenishing the reading nook this week, and remember that Leo and Tilly can also do packed lunches, so if any of the guests are planning a long hike and need that, they can order with him the night before and pick it up after seven. And if they need any equipment, they can talk to Geoff. Okay. We’re done. Onward, team.”
Everyone stood up, and Milly reached out a hand to Lorna. “Can I have a minute, Lorna?”
She waited for the others to leave the room and then sat down again.
“Problems?”
“It’s nothing. I can handle it. You’ve got enough going on, Milly.”
That was true, but she’d have even more to handle if she lost Lorna to one of the local hotels, which was always her nightmare scenario. Good staff were in high demand.
“What are you handling? Or should I ask who?”
Lorna looked at her for a moment, torn. “Brendan Scott,”
she said finally. “I knocked on his door this morning to check when would be convenient to change bedding and towels and clean the place and there was no answer, so I assumed he wasn’t in, and I opened the door.”
Milly sensed that whatever was coming wasn’t going to be good. “And?”
“Turned out he was in, but he hadn’t heard me knock. He said he was writing and he never wants to be disturbed when he’s writing. His exact words were ‘I checked in to this place precisely so that I wouldn’t be disturbed, so why are you disturbing me?’ He looked furious. Like he was going to commit one of those murders he writes about.”
Lorna shuddered. “I’m sorry, Milly. I know he’s famous and important and he pays a lot of money to book that cabin for the whole summer. I hope he doesn’t complain.”
Milly wondered why people couldn’t just be kind and polite to each other. It would make life so much easier. She’d never been rude to anyone in her life, not even the horrible woman at the doctor’s who had told her that she should be grateful to be given an appointment at all, even though it was in a month’s time and Zoe’s leg was clearly infected. She always tried to be civil, not because she was some sort of saint but because having worked in a service industry all her life, she knew how hard it was and how people were usually doing their best, and yelling at them just made it even less likely that they’d help you.
But yell people did, and she knew what it was like to be on the receiving end.
“You have nothing to be sorry for. If there any apologies owing around here, it sounds as if they should be coming from him.”
But she had no expectations of that happening. Brendan Scott was a repeat guest, and a long-stay guest at that, which was valuable to them. She couldn’t afford to lose his business, so it was a delicate situation. “When does he want us to clean the cabin?”
“I don’t know. He flustered me so much I just wanted to get out of there.”
Lorna gathered up the empty mugs from the table. “I’ll go back later and ask, but I need to make sure my last will and testament is up to date first, because I swear he looked as if he was going to kill me. He’s a moody monster.”
That decided it. “Don’t go back. I’ll handle it.”
“You? But you can’t—”
“Yes, I can. This isn’t the first time he has stayed here. I’ve dealt with him before.”
And she remembered that the last time he’d stayed with them, a few years before, Richard had asked him to sign a book and had stammered with gratitude when Brendan Scott had signed with a flourish and handed him a copy of his next book as a gift.
Richard had been starstruck. He’s a superstar, Milly.
Milly already had one superstar staying at Forest Nest. She didn’t have the energy for another one, and she didn’t think success should excuse you from displaying good manners.
“I’ll take charge of the housekeeping for that cabin for the rest of his stay. Strike it from your list.”
“Are you sure?”
Lorna breathed out. “I feel as if I should argue with you, but honestly it would be a relief.”
“I’m sure.”
Not that she was looking forward to the conversation, but she valued Lorna too much to delegate it. “Anything else on your mind?”
“No. That’s it.”
“Great. You’re doing a fantastic job, Lorna.”
Please don’t leave.
Lorna left the room with her head held high, and Milly followed her out of the building.
The sun warmed her face, peeping through the trees that shaded the reception building and the offices, and for a moment she pushed the problem of Brendan Scott and his black moods to the back of her mind. She’d work out the best way to deal with him later.
Instead of getting back into her car, she took a shortcut through the trees to the coffee shop where guests often gathered first thing in the morning.
It occupied a prime position overlooking the lake, and already a couple with their two children were sitting outside on the deck sipping cappuccinos and milkshakes in the sunshine.
She knew it was their first time here. They were staying in Cherry Lodge and would be checking out in the morning. Which made this their last day. Her mother had always insisted that guests were treated like friends, and Milly had continued that tradition. She was responsible for her mother’s legacy, and she took that responsibility seriously. “Everything okay here? How has your week been?”
“Perfect, thanks, Milly. Bliss in fact. We’ve already booked for next year. And now we’re killing time until horse riding at eleven.”
The man smiled at his daughter. “Highlight of the week.”
“Horse riding?”
She took a minute with them, chatting to the children and mentally filing away information that the team could use to enhance their next visit.
Then she walked into the café to talk to Leo.
“Hey, Milly.”
He was adding marshmallows to the most indulgent hot chocolate she’d ever seen. “Can I get you something?”
Would Nicole be hungry? What did she eat? Probably not carbs.
“Nothing, thanks, Leo. Just wanted to say hi and check everything was okay.”
She scanned the blackboard. “Today’s specials look good.”
“The roasted veg and mozzarella ciabatta is Tilly’s creation, and it’s a winner. Come back later and sample it, if you like.”
He put the hot chocolate on a tray along with a cappuccino.
“I might do that.”
It would be nice to bring Nicole here and sit on the deck so she could enjoy the view, but she knew she couldn’t risk that. It would be safer, much safer, to make her food at home. “Any problems?”
“Apart from me trying to resist Tilly’s double chocolate cookie? No, all good.”
Satisfied that everything seemed to be running smoothly, she took the path that led from the café to the lake and then followed it around the water and past the sign that said Private—nesting birds.
Nesting birds and fugitive actors, she thought as she carried on walking.
She was proud of this place, and the part she played in keeping it running. Her grandparents had built it, her mother had expanded the business, and Milly had added all the extra luxury touches from the waterside café that buzzed with activity all day to the tubs that overflowed with colorful blooms on every terrace and deck. She’d planted pots of fresh herbs for each cabin and added locally sourced food to the welcome baskets. She’d built a sauna and a games room, which had proved a hit in wet weather.
The boathouse was tucked into an inlet in the lake, hidden behind the trees, visible only at the last minute.
There was no sign of Nicole, but she could hear the shower running, so she headed for the kitchen and selected four of the eggs her mother had given her when she’d dropped Zoe off the day before.
She cracked them one by one into a large bowl and whisked them with a fork until the mixture lost its streaks and turned golden.
Then she took a pair of scissors and snipped a thick bunch of chives from one of the herb pots she kept on her windowsill. She chopped them finely, sprinkled them over the mixture and then turned on the heat under the pan.
She waited until it was exactly the right temperature and then poured in the eggs, letting them cook for a moment before coaxing the sides inward, tilting the pan so that it cooked evenly. When it was starting to set she crumbled on some soft goat cheese, added a few young spinach leaves and then folded it in half, allowing the heat to slowly melt the cheese and wilt the spinach.
“Hi.”
Nicole wandered into the kitchen, her hair still damp from the shower. She was wearing a pair of cutoff shorts and a T-shirt, and her face glowed pink from the heat of the shower.
She poured herself a glass of water and drank the whole thing.
Milly watched her for a moment, wondering what it must be like to be that beautiful.
If she looked like Nicole, maybe Richard wouldn’t have left.
She turned the heat off under the pan. She had to stop thinking like that. It wasn’t helpful or healthy.
“I made breakfast. Sorry it’s so late. I had a meeting. We’ll eat this out on the deck. There’s no one around.”
Milly divided the omelet and slid each half onto a fresh plate. Then she sprinkled the top with finely chopped parsley and handed one of the plates to Nicole, who lifted it to her nose and sighed.
“It smells incredible, but I don’t normally eat breakfast.”
Tiger appeared in the kitchen, alerted by the smell of cooking.
“You had a long journey, and you didn’t eat last night. I don’t want to have to take you to the emergency department because you’ve fainted. The eggs are fresh and organic, so is the cheese, which comes from the goats down the road. And don’t tell me you’re not hungry because that isn’t possible.”
“I’m hungry, but I’m always hungry. It’s part of the job.”
But Nicole lifted the plate again and breathed deeply. “Okay. Let’s do this. I don’t suppose one plate of eggs is going to do much harm. And my acting days may be over anyway.”
She said it lightly, an almost throwaway comment, but Milly knew Nicole. Whatever gulf there might be between them, she knew her. And she knew the comment wasn’t made lightly.
“That’s the way you feel?”
Milly handed her a fork. “You love acting.”
“Maybe. But I don’t love all the things that go with it. And things are complicated at the moment.”
She paused, and Milly had the feeling that she was going to confess something momentous, but then she shook her head. “I’ll figure it out.”
Figure what out?
In the old days they’d had no secrets from each other, but that was then and this was now.
And how complicated could Nicole’s life be, really?
Milly had a job to do, a child to care for, a life to live, and she had an A-list movie star hiding away in her home. It didn’t get much more complicated than that.
Was Nicole afraid to do another movie because of the adverse publicity? No, surely not. She was used to that.
She wanted to ask what this was all about really, what Nicole was doing here, but she was conscious of all the jobs stacking up waiting for her attention. She didn’t have time for a long conversation. Later, she thought. It would have to wait until later.
“What are you going to do all day? I’m worried you’ll be bored.”
“I never have time to myself. This is going to be a treat.”
They settled themselves at the table by the water and Nicole sampled a mouthful of her food.
“Oh—”
she said and closed her eyes, lost in a dream state as she chewed “—this might be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”
“It’s just eggs and cheese.”
Nicole shook her head and opened her eyes. “No, it’s—”
She sliced another piece with the edge of her fork. “I don’t know what you’ve done here, but you should open a restaurant.”
“When? In my spare time? Also, I’d just comfort-eat more than I do already, which wouldn’t be good.”
But she was warmed by the compliment. And the biggest compliment was that Nicole had devoured every mouthful and was looking sadly at her empty plate as if she could have eaten exactly the same again had it been on offer.
“What did you do to that food? I feel a thousand times better. It’s like magic.”
“Good.”
Milly put her fork down. “I told Zoe about you. I couldn’t see a way to avoid that.”
“It’s fine. I understand.”
“She won’t say anything.”
She hoped to goodness that was true and that Zoe wasn’t currently huddled by the lockers with her friends telling them her new and shiny secret.
“You should tell Connie too. And Nanna Peg.”
Nicole put her fork down. “Unless they’re shocked by my latest scandal, of course.”
She sounded flippant, as if she didn’t care, but Milly knew she cared a lot. Nicole was desperate for approval. Desperate for a place in the sun.
“Nothing shocks them. And they love you, you know that.”
“Do they? Even though I’ve been a useless friend lately?”
Was she expecting Milly to deny it? Because that wasn’t happening.
“I haven’t told them about that. They don’t know we haven’t been in touch.”
They would have been upset for her. Angry with Nicole. And Milly didn’t want that. She’d kept hoping it would come right, and by the time she’d realized that wasn’t going to happen, there didn’t seem any point in telling them. “Are you sure you’re comfortable with me telling them you’re here? It would make things easier.”
“Yes. Having me here is an imposition. I don’t want to make this harder for you.”
Nicole sounded almost humble, and Milly stood up and cleared the plates.
“I have to get to work.”
“Now? I thought we could talk. Like we used to.”
Like we used to.
There was a wistful, apologetic note in Nicole’s voice, and for a moment Milly felt a yearning so strong that she almost flung her arms around her friend just for the comfort.
She was tempted to blurt out how frustrated she was with Richard, how tough life was and how much she was struggling. That’s what she would have done in the past, and somehow just sharing it with Nicole would have made it all the more bearable. The old Nicole would have hugged her tightly, shared her disgust at Richard’s behavior and then somehow managed to say something that made her laugh, despite everything that was happening. She’d often thought that a really true friend beat comfort-eating, drugs or alcohol every time. But that was then and this was now.
Nicole hadn’t been there for Milly at her lowest point. She hadn’t cared enough, and Milly couldn’t get past the hurt she felt about that. Her pride and her sense of self-preservation wouldn’t let her get past it. The trust between them had been damaged. If Nicole didn’t need her, then she’d make sure she didn’t need Nicole. She’d offer sanctuary and whatever practical help was needed because she liked to think she was the sort of person who would help anyone who was desperate, but that was all she was offering.
And she needed to accept that in life people disappointed you and let you down. That was a fact. But she’d be fine. She’d been forced to manage without Nicole in the wings cheering her on, and she’d survived, hadn’t she?
Maybe it hadn’t been fun, but she’d survived. And she was proud of that.
“There will be plenty of time to talk later. I need to get to work. We’re fully booked and short-staffed. I need to talk to Joel about maintenance, and then I’m rolling up my sleeves and cleaning a few cabins.”
Not a few. Just the one currently inhabited by Brendan Scott, but Nicole didn’t need the detail. “You should probably stay here, out of sight. Is there anything you need before I go?”
“A new identity? A do-over of my whole life?”
Nicole gave a tired smile. “Just kidding. No, there’s nothing I need. And I’ll be fine. I’ll have a quiet day. Thank you.”
Milly thought of Nicole having an entire day to herself and felt a twinge of envy. She would have given a lot for a quiet day.